Chapter 15.5| Confession
On the way back, a few people remained taciturn.
Once inside the residential area, Meng Yin finally spoke up, "Xu Zhiyi, I need to talk to you." Zhiyi responded with a simple "Hmm" as they both sat down on a bench within the neighbourhood.
Meng Yin straightened his legs, palms pressed against the edge of the bench, fingers lightly tapping on the wooden surface, her eyelids drooping, gaze unfocused like a guilty child.
On the early winter day, Yin's palms were slightly sweaty, the moment felt both prolonged and fleeting as he took a deep breath, "I lied to you before."
Zhiyi remained silent as Yin continued, "Back in the summer when you asked me about my university plans, I told you that my family arranged for me to study abroad based on my college entrance exam results. That was a lie. I had no intention of going abroad. I actually wanted to apply to the Education Department at University Z."
This confession had weighed heavily on Yin for a long time until he saw them discussing ideal universities at noon, pushing her to come clean and apologize to Xu Zhiyi.
She wanted to study Education, specifically at a domestic university.
"My mindset back then was completely different from now. I didn't want you to know about my situation at THS, about the future, I wasn't sure about sharing it with you."
Apart from the essential eight hours of sleep, one's school life surpassed 12 hours a day, shaping not only their youth with teachers and classmates but also influencing their self-belief and daring for the future.
Xu Zhiyi glanced at Meng Yin's profile, her disappointment and sadness were palpable, without reservation.
Zhiyicouldn't help but think she had been concealing her emotions before. Letting out a sigh, he inquired, "Why didn't you want me to know?"
"Because I felt it would be unpleasant, in both life and studies," Yin replied.
As their gazes met, she no longer veiled her emotions and explained the reason, feeling relieved to unburden herself. "In my first year at THS, I was an avid viewer of Xipei's videos. FHS was my goal for the high school entrance exam, and I was envious. I refrained from mentioning anything about THS because it would give me away, and you are too clever. Once revealed..." Yin paused, saying, "I was afraid you would think I was no longer the Meng Yin you once knew."
When Xu Zhiyi wanted to exchange their happiest and saddest moments, Yin already felt she couldn't keep it hidden. People often discover the most inconspicuous flaws in each other through daily interactions.
"You should know, I am easily happy, a bit proud but sometimes need encouragement to be confident."
Compared to Xu Zhiyi's high school life, her life seemed chaotic, where each experience challenged her formed values. Often, she felt like a tiny organism suppressed by the pressure of the deep sea, struggling for air, desperately swimming towards the direction where sunlight penetrated, trying to break through the surface.
"Those incidents really shook my confidence." Yin paused and continued, "When I was in my second year, I thought about my future plan. It was the first time I was so clear about wanting to study education at University Z and become a teacher. But back then, I seemed... too afraid to speak up."
Some people march confidently forward, unafraid of the future; while others second-guess themselves midway, becoming sensitive, just to ensure they haven't made a wrong step along the way.
"So you found an excuse about going abroad."
"Yes."
"Silly." His not-so-thin palm soothingly scratched her head, warmth seeping through her skin. Yin never expected Zhiyi to suddenly call her out like that.
In that bewildered moment, she heard Zhiyi continue, "Why are you now thinking of confessing your mistakes?"
"Because...because you are important to me, and lying to you would weigh heavily on my conscience."
After Yin finished speaking, her heart rate increased significantly, holding her breath.
Words rushed out too fast, too many.
The stunned person was replaced by Xu Zhiyi, he didn't think that his position in Yin's heart would be - a very important person.
He sighed softly again, withdrew his hand, and seemed to remind, "Meng Yin, I have always been your comrade-in-arms, have you forgotten?" "
You're also a very important person to me.
My dear, my comrade, I have always been proud of you.
yes, if she hadn't realized it, she wouldn't have revealed those stories to Xu Zhiyi.
Because he is a comrade-in-arms, she doesn't want to deceive Xu Zhiyi, he is a very important person.
Zhiyi stood up, his tall figure blocked the light and shadow cast by some street lamps, and he said, "Let's go, I'll go to see Granny Yu again tomorrow." "
Yin raised her head abruptly and blurted out, "How do you know?" "
She was greeted by a sigh of laughter from Xu Zhiyi, who was laughed at angrily.
My dear, I have always been your comrade, forgot what I just said.