Respite

*This chapter is so damn long, it's 4k words, twice what I usually write for a longer chapter. I'm cooked mentally :))

Anyway, nothing too interesting happening here, just a little bit of emotional stuff and the cherry on top at the end (don't judge me for it, I ll say I'm only human after all and I'm already waiting for you guys to post gifs about this meme)

So yeah, enjoy, and I'll come with the omakes idk when exactly, since we're in for a bit of fun now before the Xianzhou. Peace out and Deus vult.*

Once again, Mark found himself on the ground, outside the Express. This time, however, things were different. Nature was slowly blossoming between the fading remnants of snow, the eternal winter that the planet was facing nothing but a foggy memory. Grass began growing slowly, reaching out towards the warmth of the sun. 

"Heh, this place sure looks a lot better." 

His steps guided him slowly back to the city of Belobog, where the people were all outside, enjoying the weather. For them, it was something beyond imagination, something that they wouldn't have expected to see even in their wildest dreams. For Mark, however, it was nothing but a normal scene. 

"That's how stark the contrast between people can be. What's normal for me is special for them. Heh..." 

People from the Underworld were coming to the surface and going as they wished. Their homes were still beneath, and Mark couldn't help but wonder about how it would all unfold. He wiped a few droplets of blood as he thought about the IPC trying to interfere with the world once more. They'd lose their ability to help the world grow as part of what they bring to the table. 

He couldn't help but smile at the thought. Around, the people didn't even bat an eye his way, which he found a little odd since, as far as he recalled, the Astral Express crew was sort of hailed as heroes or something along those lines. He simply shrugged, walking along his way, heading to the Qlipoth Fort, looking for Bronya. 

Just as he was about to enter, a guard stopped him. Mark nearly couldn't believe the audacity. As he hoped to argue his case, a familiar voice could be heard. 

"Let him in." 

The soldier was quick to apologize and allow Mark passage. The one he met was none other than Bronya. 

"Heh, I guess you're all up and about more than I expected. What's the situation like? I was out for two days then randomly bolted before I could have a proper chat with any of you." 

Bronya shook her head slightly, a tiny smile on her lips. Her voice was calm and composed, fitting for someone of her status. 

"Since our return, mother... Madam Cocolia chose to step down from her position as Supreme Guardian, allowing me to take over. Ever since then, Seele has been lending a hand, ensuring that I have someone by my side. Both the Underworld and the Overworld are working relentlessly to adapt to the new environment." 

She looked out the windows as they both paced to her office, their steps light in the silent building. Everyone was out and about working, overseeing tasks, and handling administrative problems. 

Bronya's eyes met his, searching for something, but to no avail. 

"I don't know what trick you managed to pull, but in the end, the world returned to this state. As the Supreme Guardina, I wish to extend our heartfelt thanks." 

Mark nodded, smiling a bit. He wasn't good with those things, so he simply brushed it off. 

"Hey, no need for that sort of talk. We're friends, right? Just say thanks or something and I'm good. I'm also glad that it worked out and I managed to keep my promises." 

They reached her office, and Bronya stood by her seat at the large desk. Piles of papers were stacked there, awaiting her careful inspection. 

"I guess you're buried in work here. I'll take my leave, then. Who knows? I'm sure we'll all meet again, but until then, just in case, I'll say my farewells here." 

She gave a light nod, looking him over once more. She stepped closer and gave him a hug, something he didn't expect in the least. His brain sparked as errors popped in his mind, yet he simply hugged her back. 

"I see. I hope we'll meet again. No matter how far apart, always remember that you have a spot here. Not just you, but the entire Astral Express." 

She let go slowly, and Mark felt the warmth slowly dissipate. It had been quite some time since his last hug from someone non-related to him. 

"I'm glad to know that. We'll visit from time to time, and hey, we've got phones and stuff. We can keep in touch no matter the distance, right?" 

Mark took out his own, only to realize that there would be software issues and whatnot, pure discrepancies with his and what the world had to offer. 

"Well, maybe I should get this one changed. I guess there's something wrong with it. No worries, tho, I'll make sure to grab your contacts from the others. Until then, take care, Supreme Guardian." 

He said her title with a smirk on his face, one filled with joy, not malice. In the end, some things were bound to happen, even if what led to them differed. His steps echoed as he walked out, hands in pockets, his pipe still at his side, gripped under his armpit. Bronya's eyes were glued to him until he disappeared from sight. 

Once outside, his steps took him to another place, the one where it all started. Serval's workshop was pretty much a ghost town, safe for her and someone he didn't expect to see there of all places. He entered, only to see both Serval and Cocolia working on something together. 

Mentally, he braced himself for the worst, for a possible argument or something, yet they shared laughs together, enjoying their time. The two of them finally noticed his presence and lifted their faces to meet him. 

"Oh, Mark, nice to see you here. You just vanished earlier, so we were worried that you left without saying goodbye." 

He chuckled, shaking his head. How could he, who gets attached easily, just do that sort of thing? 

"I'd never do that, trust me." 

He stepped closer, smiling at them both. Somehow, they looked way younger when indulging in their work. 

"So, I see that you two just picked up things where you left." 

Cocolia nodded, her expression faltering slightly. The guilt was visible despite her best attempts at hiding it. 

"Yes, we sure did. It's thanks to Serval for forgiving me and thanks to you for saving me. I didn't manage to say it properly last time." 

She stepped closer, and he found himself hugged once more. Something sure was odd, and he bit his tongue just to make sure he wasn't dreaming or something. Still, he just patted her head and nodded. 

"No worries, it's all fine." 

Serval chuckled and sneaked up closer, pouncing on them both. 

"This calls for a group hug!" 

Mark found himself squished between them both, his face red both from lack of air and embarrassment. 

"You're both kind of knocking my breath out," he mustered, the sound close to a simple breath. They both let go, smiling warmly. 

"Aw, come on, it's not every day two women like us just want to hold you, right?" 

Classic Serval moment. Mark retorted, ready with the line. 

"Oh, shush, I sure hope you didn't ditch Dunn and you went on that date with him." 

She thought for a moment, and surprisingly, her expression was quite pleased. 

"Well, we didn't go on it yet, since he's busy with work, but he did come by and dropped a bouquet of flowers and a formal invitation. I was a bit caught off guard by that gesture, but it was pretty nice of him." 

Inside, Mark hit the victor's pose, glad that things worked out—at least to this point. 

"Well, glad to hear that it's all fine." 

He took one more look around the workshop, pulling out the sword from its resting place on his back. 

"To think that I managed to do this thing a while back with just your tools. Heh, everything is possible when you try hard enough, right?" 

Cocolia's gaze roamed over the simple blade. It wasn't anything special, just a rusted cog for a handguard, with a smaller pipe covered in rubber for a handle. The blade itself was pretty rugged, silvery in color from the polish, but scratches ran along quite deeply. It was clear that he had done it fast, paying no attention to details. 

"It looks good. I'm glad to see that others share in the same passions as Serval and I." 

Mark smiled a bit and put it back, crossing his arms with a smile, the pipe not leaving his side. 

"I do like tinkering a bit here and there. Well, anyway, I simply came here to say my goodbyes. Who knows when we'll meet again?" 

He chuckled, trying to shrug it all off as nothing important. He knew the Astral Express would come by a few more times, he knew plenty of things, and yet he couldn't be sure that the timeline would go on the same way. He'd do his best to follow a specific scenario, but in the end, it's not up to him. 

"Already leaving, huh? It feels like yesterday I had to take care of you because you were frozen." 

He chuckled and nodded, making his way to the exit. The door opened, light streaming in around his frame. He looked at them both over his shoulder and smiled. 

"See you again..." 

The door closed with a soft thud, a sign of his consideration. He didn't want to ruin the moment with loud noises, doing his best to keep the tears in. Indeed, separation puts quite the toll on anyone. 

He made sure to walk around some more, taking in the sights on his own. Slowly, he made his way to the underground, walking to the familiar clinic where Natasha was finally able to catch a break. The place was empty, safe for her. 

"Hey, I hope I'm not bothering," said Mark, peeking through the ajar door. 

"Come in, Mark. You'll never be a bother, you should know that much." 

He stepped in carefully, looking around, reminiscing about how the others had been knocked out cold by Sampo's smoke bombs. He smiled to himself, sitting on the edge of one of the beds. 

"I guess you're finally able to rest a bit, right?" 

She gave a soft nod, looking at him with her usual soft gaze, fatigue gone from it. 

"Yes, I finally have some time to breathe. I'm sure it won't last long, but until then, I'll try to catch up on some much-needed shut eye." 

He gave a light nod, staring out the window. The streets were empty. 

"Everyone went to the Overworld. You should have seen the kids. They were so excited to see the sun. Some of them had never stepped out before." 

He nodded, thinking about the sort of life they had led. Indeed, nothing he could picture seemed pretty. 

"I see. Well, I'm glad it turned out this way." 

He stood up, ready to leave. He was pretty tired, and trying to suppress his feelings even more didn't help a lot. 

"Leaving already?" asked Natasha, a brow raised. 

"Yes, I am. I came here just to say my goodbyes. I'm not sure about when we're leaving, but I'm sure we'll come by again. Still, it could be a pretty long time before we return, so I just wanted to set the record straight." 

She gave a soft nod, stepping closer. By that point, Mark sort of knew what to expect, yet her gesture was more on his side of things. She gently patted his head, and then he realized that, despite being taller, he was still a young man, not even in his twenties, perhaps just a child in her eyes. 

"Make sure to take care of yourself, alright? This is coming from a doctor, so you should listen to me." 

She ruffled his hair, which made him laugh. For a moment, he felt carefree, lacking in worries and trouble. He nodded, smiling. 

"I'll do my best. I can't make promises, tho, and you know it. The stunt I pulled is proof of it. But don't worry, I'll make sure to reach out if I need medical advice." 

She nodded, bidding him farewell, watching as he left. He took a few corners, walking through the underground, looking for someone else—someone that was a mysterious 4th wallbreaker ever since his in-game days. 

"Looking for me, my friend?" 

Sampo was relaxing against a wall, arms crossed, his usual expression on, a mix of cockiness and too much relaxation. 

"Yes, looking for you, comrade. Came here to say goodbye—that much you should have expected already." 

Mark reached out for a handshake, which he got in full, Sampo's grip firm. 

"Well, my friend, I hope we'll meet again." 

Mark nodded, staring straight at him. 

"Yes, I hope so too." 

He recalled the moment in the game where Sampo asked if his funny little acts made the players enjoy themselves, so Mark had to deliver the answer. 

"Also, Sampo, yes... your acts of humor are nice. I did enjoy them." 

The man raised a brow but simply went along with him, shrugging. 

"I'm not sure where that came from, but the great Sampo Koski will gladly accept the compliment." 

Mark went on his way, looking to go above ground. Paying Svarog a visit would be pointless, and Clara wasn't all that familiar with him either way. In the end, he pretty much paid everyone a visit. As he made his way outside, he looked over the Qlipoth Fort once more, only to feel something hit the back of his legs. He turned around, finding Seele with her scythe in hand, the blunt of it pointed at his legs. 

"Well, well, well, look who decided to come back. Bronya told me that you came here to say your goodbyes, so I thought I'd surprise you instead." 

Mark chuckled, the pain fading away slowly but steadily. He moved a little from one leg to another, just to make sure they worked fine. 

"Yeah, I'm out. Also, nice to see that you finally decided to change those tiny shorts of yours." 

She looked down, then back at him, shrugging. 

"It's not like they bothered me that much, you know? Plus, with how harsh life in the underground was, I had no choice but to adapt. Clothes were luxury in there." 

He nodded, understanding where she came from. Still, he didn't think it impossible to find a new pair of pants. Alas, he chose to leave it at that. 

"Well, yeah, I am leaving. I mean, I'm sure the Express might stick around for a while longer, but I, for one, have some work to handle. Not sure you'll be seeing more of me for a while." 

She scoffed, crossing her arms, standing by his side. For him, she was pretty short, but he didn't talk smack. 

"As if I'd miss you or anything. Still, I have to give it to you, you did a fine job somehow fixing the mess. I won't ask for details, since it's probably something I won't understand either way, but... thanks." 

Mark nodded, glancing down at her for a brief moment, then back at the fort. The place had a familiar warmth to it, and it's not that which saved him from freezing on the first day. 

"Seele, please take care of Bronya, ok? She tends to overwork herself. Watch over her, and sometimes smack some sense into her. You're the part she lacks, you know? Same with me and my best friends. We tend to complete each other in different ways." 

She put her scythe aside, giving his words a little thought. 

"I already had that much in plan. Also, what about your friends? The ones you just spoke of?" 

Mark stared off into the distance, up into the sky, way past it, to a point he didn't even know of. 

"My friends, huh? They're back home." 

She looked up, only for her face to show pure realization and shock. 

"Wait, you're not from Belobog? What?" 

He nodded and left it at that. 

"It's something too difficult, something even I don't fully comprehend. For now, just... leave it like this." 

He took a deep breath, and his smile appeared again, yet it still was a far cry from the genuine warmth from earlier. 

"See you later, Seele... I don't know when later, but later." 

She nodded and gave him a few smacks on the back. 

"Take care, alright?" 

His steps carried him slowly, away from the hustle and bustle of the city, right to the quiet place where the Express had landed. He boarded it quietly, just him. No one was around the parlor except for Pom-Pom. Mark gave him a salute in the military style, his palm touching his right temple, and Pom-Pom answered in the same manner. 

"Heh, that's the best conductor there is. Keep it up, Pom-Pom." 

"Aye aye!" 

Mark chuckled and went to his room, falling on the bed as if something knocked him off his feet. The fatigue had caught up to him, both the remnants from the battle and those from him forcing his body to move. 

................................................................. 

His vision blurred, slowly revealing his family home. Again, his nightmare was back, stronger than ever. In none of the prior nights was it that vivid, and the thought scared him. 

"Great, just my luck. Must be from too much emotional stimulation, both the weight of separation here and the weight of separation from my old life without me even having a choice. For them, I just vanished." 

He walked around the familiar place, looking around. Sure, discrepancies were everywhere since dreams couldn't be perfect. Still, the sights he came across were tormenting him. His family gathered together, crying, unsure of where he was. They didn't know what had happened, blaming themselves and the world. Just like the other times, he couldn't interact. 

"It's your fault..." 

The message echoed harshly, crashing against his skull. The pain somehow felt real, against the laws of dreams. 

He kept walking, silently, exiting the house. It only brought him to another place, the spot where he and his friends would hang out. Instead of four, only three spots were occupied, the place where he sat empty. 

"Where could he have gone?" 

"I have no clue. Like damn, he didn't even let us know. He just vanished. What could have gone wrong?" 

The voices of his friends carried pain and anguish within. For him, they were his brothers, the ones who knew all his secrets, the ones who had his trust in full. 

"You're to blame..." 

Again, the voice thundered loudly. He tried moving away, hoping to cling to what little power he held, but slowly his mind slipped past his control, falling in the turmoil of emotions. Suddenly, it was night, and countless whispers were heard all around. Crawling around, thousands upon thousands of creatures called him different things, blaming him, reminding him of everything. 

"No, I have overcome this once, I'm stronger." 

"Are you?" 

The question echoed in the night, his own voice being that to accuse him. Before his eyes stood... him. It was himself, the version of him that he tried to keep hidden, buried. It was all a struggle. 

"Are you truly stronger? Don't fool yourself. You did nothing, just as usual. You merely managed to interfere and cause a mess larger than yourself. It's pure luck that you didn't die, pure luck that THEY didn't die thanks to you. You're reckless, a fool..." 

The voice grew harsher, the disturbing figure of himself changing shapes, altering itself into nothing but a pure nightmare. Mark shrunk, and before he knew it, he was in the middle of the dark, feeling the creatures crawl around and on him. 

"You're nothing." 

The voices kept repeating that, the creatures as well, everything just said it louder and louder until he couldn't take it. 

................................................................. 

He woke up covered in sweat, worse than ever before. That other self of his was new. He hadn't seen it in the other nightmares. Usually, it would end with the creatures surrounding him, but not with them crawling on him, not with them swallowing him whole. 

He stood up, trying to calm down. Nothing could have prepared him for that. Five minutes passed as he simply stared at the floor, trying to calm down and make sense of the world around him. Shouts lingered behind his lips, cries, tears waiting to burst out, but he couldn't let them out. 

"Damn me..." he whispered, his hand clutching his forehead. His steps were shaky, his legs like twigs. As he left his room, he finally became aware that it was night. Oh, he had missed seeing the darkness outside when it was night, not having to guess the time of the day on pure instinct. 

"Well, there goes my sleep," he chuckled, trying to bring out his usual self, the carefree guy who didn't give two fucks. 

Silently, he made his way into the parlor, having walked along the other housing compartment. The door opened slowly, revealing Himeko with a cup of coffee in her hand, sipping slowly, indulging in the bitter taste of her drink. 

"Oh, I didn't think anyone else would be awake at this time of the night," said Himeko, giving Mark a friendly smile. For a moment, he had forgotten about his trouble, but it soon washed over him again. 

"Yeah, couldn't quite sleep, so I said I'd come here. What's keeping you awake, Miss Himeko?" 

Her soft laughter filled the room, revitalizing Mark's tired self. 

"Oh, please, just call me Himeko. As for what has me awake at this hour, it should be pretty obvious. It's work. Being the Navigator, I have a lot of duties to tend to." 

He nodded, taking a seat on the couch, leaving a bit of distance between them. 

"Would you like a cup of coffee? I tried something extra bitter today." 

She said it so proudly that Mark couldn't refuse. 

"Sure, one cup shouldn't hurt. Not like I planned on sleeping either way." 

In the blink of an eye, she handed him a tiny plate with a cup of the dark, steaming concoction. Mark gave his thanks and took a sip. Indeed, it was even harder than the other one, yet the taste brought him tranquility. He chugged it down once more, not bothering to savor the taste. 

"Thank you, Himeko. You're a lifesaver." 

She smiled warmly, her gaze not leaving him even as he put the empty cup away. 

"Now, Mark, perhaps you'd like to tell me why you're actually awake. I'm sure something must be bothering you since you came in with a hint of fear in your eyes." 

Sharp, that's one of the reasons why Mark admired her. Still, in this case, it all worked against him. He didn't wish to reveal anything, so he just stood there quietly. Sensing that something was, in fact, wrong, she moved closer, sitting next to him. She tilted his head slightly with her hand, cupping his chin gently. 

"Now, would you like to tell me what's wrong? I might not look the part, but I'm pretty good at comforting people." 

Mark took a small breath, suddenly aware of the closeness between them. His cheeks betrayed a rosy hint of color, accompanied by a bit of warmth. For the first time in a good while, he felt comfortable enough, so he chose to open up. He briefed her in on the nightmare he had, expecting a few questions that would only add fuel to the fire. 

She followed along, nodding understandingly, aware of what he was going through. 

"Your family. You left without saying a thing?" 

Her voice was soft, as if afraid that asking would hurt him more. He nodded, trying to put his ideas into thoughts. 

"Yes, I have. Not by my own will, but I just... woke up here, on Jarilo-VI, and nearly died from the cold. I have no clue how I got there, no memories of the past beyond a certain point. I'm just... I just..." 

His voice cracked, and he fought back the hail of tears that nearly broke out. He closed his eyes, hoping that it would make the tears go away, or at least remain hidden. Crying in front of others is something that he never liked doing. 

Suddenly, he felt the warmth of her arms wrapping around him, holding him tightly. His face came to rest against something soft, the gentle thud of her heart barely felt. She held him in silence, running her fingers through his hair. 

"Shh, it's ok. It's fine to feel the way you do, Mark. You were taken away without explanation, stripped of part of your memories, then you got involved in something even bigger. Just rest." 

Soft were her whispered words, and softer was her skin. Mark opened his eyes briefly, feeling the tears finally win. He cried in silence, simply letting them roll along his face without making any noises. The least he could do was to keep a straight face. She didn't let go; she just kept holding him, wiping away his tears with gentle touches, her hair tickling him softly. Before he knew it, he had melted fully in her arms.