Chapter Six

Sarah is a CEO, as I have learned. I was drinking wine with her in her apartment. Sarah asked me if I would like to attend church with her. As I realized I was uncomfortable, I asked her, "Are you okay about attending church?" Sarah asked. I sighed. "I guess so." I sipped the wine again. Bradley was still in his bedroom. I moved in with him because he's helping me move on. My belief that I couldn't live on my own was false. I am afraid, and I just need him. So Bradley and I agreed to live together.

I was sitting in church on a Sunday morning. I was listening to the pastor's sermon with Sarah next to me. As I sat on the bench, I noticed the pastor talking about guilt. After listening, I started feeling uncomfortable. As time went on, I began to feel guilty. For me, I didn't have a bible, Sarah had hers open. So I listened, and may God have mercy on me.

We leave the church together. The preacher shakes hands with everyone as we depart. He is introduced to me by Sarah. "Hello, pastor, this is Jessie. He has never attended our church before, so he came today." The pastor greeted me and we shook hands. "It's nice to meet you, Jessie." I replied that it was nice to meet him, too, and he just started talking about God. "Has God been good to you lately?" He asked.

I was quiet the whole time I was driving home. Sara sat in the passenger seat. We were driving home. She could tell that I was thinking about something as she turned her head. Does she read minds now?

I went straight to my nightstand as soon as I walked into my bedroom. I unplugged my smartphone. Bradley turned to me and asked if he had found his missing shoe. When I walked out of my bedroom, I said, "You've been losing things." "Uh, you do know that you've lost things as well, right?" I chuckled, "But not as much as you."

Sarah and I decide to have a picnic on what feels like our hundredth date. The picnic basket was placed on top of the blanket. She and I knelt down to get comfortable. The sky looked cloudy, and I sensed rain.

I asked. "How are your parents?"

"I suppose they are good. I rarely see them."

When I opened a bottle of champagne, it splashed everywhere. Sarah laughed. She was hysterical as she laughed. I was laughing right along with her. During our conversation, I played with Sarah's hair. When she moaned, I asked her if that felt good. "It does," Sarah replied. Then I played with her hair some more.

"Dude, you're gonna kill me." Bradley and I were playing video games on an Xbox. When I beat Bradley, "Awww dang it." I softly laughed, "I beat you again." I got up and walked to the kitchen. Bradley and I were talking about random things, so I went to one of the cabinets to get a bag of chips. When I returned to the counter, I opened the bag. After pouring the chips into the bowl, I closed the bag with a clip and set it aside. I sat down again with the bowl of chips in hand.

Sarah and I went out for ice cream and chatted. In response, Sarah asked, "So, what is your life story?" I sighed, "I guess I just told you." She chuckled, "Not your typical story." Sarah ate her ice cream as she asked, "What are your hobbies?" I licked my ice cream and began to speak.

According to Sarah, I am a writer, however, at the moment I am experiencing writer's block. "So?" I asked, "What else is there to know? Sarah shrugged, "Is there anything else I should know about you?" I didn't want to tell her I was guilty. That's who I am. The fact that Rebecca won't return has just dawned on me. I feel guilty, and I am filled with guilt.