webnovel

4. Chapter 4

A/N: Welp, this took longer than I thought. I've been at this since- well, I think it's been 12+ now. Needless to say, I'm exhausted and it's unbeta'd and I'm not sure how I feel about the last bit but I really wanted to write this and give it to you.

Thank you all for you continued support whether it be in the form of comments or follow/favorites or kudos. It's all most welcome. And I know this may come off obnoxious and needy and desperate, but I hope most of all for this chapter in particular you'll take the time to leave me a comment because it really truly helps to know if I did this POV justice.

Please, enjoy the last chapter of this story.

Same disclaimer as always; characters and the show and the comics etc are not mine.

It's one of the few quiet mornings she's had since she landed in Earth so many moons ago.

She thinks, often, that it's probably due to the time of day her body rouses; not many humans are inexplicably awakening with the sun because their very molecules are humming for the rays of this planet's yellow sun, reaching out earnestly, entire body all but singing the second the first ray touches her skin.

To say it was an adjustment would be an understatement, especially when she was 12 and suddenly super and every little move would wreak havoc on the Danvers' home because Kara had sneezed and flown through the wall from the force of it.

Alex had been really… miffed… at that rude awakening at 5 in the morning during her summer holidays.

So Kara quickly learned to follow the pull and give in to her body's cravings for sunlight, and the Danvers' smiled softly and nodded quietly and didn't freak out whenever they'd wake up and find the teenager missing because one look out the window and they'd see her, lying on her back with her eyes closed on the grass of their back yard. She looked at peace.

Truthfully though, she was, somehow, even lonelier.

Eventually though – and it took quite some time – Alex warmed up to Kara, and the blonde was getting less lonely, not by much, but it wasn't as heavy as the boom of a planet in her chest, a constant ache anymore.

The mornings when Alex would find it in her to drag herself out of bed – because even if she didn't have super hearing, she became so attuned to her baby sister that she'd wake even though Kara had long ago mastered the art of being quiet – to join Kara out for the sunrise are her among her favorite memories and will be forever.

When she moved National City, there was, understandably, less capability to lie out on grass as the sun broke behind the city skyline; she got weird looks and was almost robbed at gunpoint that first morning she tried to lie down in the park. Thankfully she managed to, uh, outrun her would-be assailant.

She learned to settle for standing in her apartment, behind the floor to ceiling windows that were the reason she bought the place to begin with.

Some nights, when the weight of the loss of Krypton was heaviest in her heart, she'd sleep on the couch so the sun's rays would be the first thing to happen to her that morning – seeping into her cold bones; setting her cells on high alert; making her whole frame vibrate at a soothing frequency; let the light push out the sadness from her blood stream and takes its place instead.

She had stopped resenting her body's inability to let her sleep in like she sometimes wishes she could; it's just another reminder that she isn't human, and she's made her peace with being an alien because the pros outweigh the cons when she reminds herself that she saves people instead.

Though standing here, behind a different set of floor to ceiling windows, she finds herself wishing she could indulge in the comfort of sleep just a little longer.

She wishes she could let her eyes flutter slowly like she's seen so many humans do when they wake up, instead of waking up painfully alert and on edge, ready for a fight that isn't there.

She wishes it would take her a few seconds to recognize where she is and just get to be lazy in bed, instead of the instant hum of energy turning on just beneath her skin.

She wishes she could experience everything with the shroud of sleep still pulling at her eyes; see things with a hazy edge that dulls the crisp angles, instead of the clarity and sharpness of colors and corners and points that are almost painful.

Turning, she looks at the large bed in the middle of the enormous room, with its rumpled sheets and the beautiful woman still peacefully asleep.

She wishes she could wake up at a more normal time so she could watch her bedmate's greener than green eyes flutter open, so she could say that's the first thing she saw every morning.

She wishes she could wake up at a more normal time so she could see her bedmate's softer edges, before the CEO face had to slot into place.

With an amused smile, Kara marvels at herself for holding out as long as she did because, really, she never stood a chance.

Falling for Lena Luthor was inevitable, like growing old.

She sure hopes she'll get to do just that with Lena too.

Lena Luthor who – with her sinfully red lips forming naughty smirks, and eyes achingly green, had snuck up on Kara Danvers – was the other reason for the quietness in the superhero's mind.

With Lena, Kara's mind wasn't buzzing at all times; her ears weren't pushed to the limits of the city in case of trouble; her mind wasn't being split in half trying to keep up with which persona she was at any given moment. Lena neatly and wholly slotted herself into Kara's conscience and sub conscience and, put very simply, consumed all of Kara's attention.

Unlike the rest of Kara's life, it wasn't some big affair or production. It just… clicked into place, quietly and without fuss.

Try as she might to resist, to stay in this quiet moment just a little longer, she has no other choice but to let the sounds of the city slowly filter back into her ear and invade her brain; there is always someone that needs her help, even at this ungodly early hour.

But, she thinks to herself on a rare selfish moment, the cats stuck up trees can wait just a little longer, and that family moving in down the block don't really need help moving their couch in this exact moment, and Mrs. Jacobs in her own building won't need help to get groceries for another two hours. So, sooner than she has in the past, Kara's stepping away from her spot in the sun behind the glass and moving back towards the bed, pushing aside her cells' protest that they're not full yet, musing to herself that it reminds her of when Alex takes away the container of potstickers.

Her smile is soft and reverent as she slips back into her side of the bed – she has a side of the bed – and allows herself a few moments of basking, of letting the backs of her fingers run ever so lightly down the middle of Lena's bare back, of letting her lips find a home against the back of the CEO's neck, of letting her forehead lie gently against her girlfriend's shoulder blade and breathe her in.

As she stays there just long enough to feel more intoxicated than any Zakarian ale can do to her, she smiles because her body's tugs to get back into the sun have ceased, and she knows deep down, as another piece of the puzzle slots into place to fill part of the gap left behind by the destruction of Krypton.

Lena Luthor – who has sharp edges and a lifetime of heart wrenching issues, who lives her life in broad strokes of grey and monochrome, who has more love than she knows what to do with because she didn't experience it herself throughout her life – she's all the sun Kara needs.

The superhero takes her time trailing the tip of her index finger on Lena's back down to where the sheets rest on her lower back, touch getting lighter the further she goes as she eventually pulls away with a last lingering kiss to the raven-haired woman's shoulder, resigned to starting her Super day when she can hear someone's car get a flat tire down the block.

Thankfully, it's a quiet morning, and Kara thanks Rao for small blessings as she flies home – back to Lena - after checking up on Maggie, complete with breakfast and a hangover cure, hearing some officers talk about Maggie's latest victim being a toddler. She still shudders with disgust at the thought and the grief running through her, vowing to double her, admittedly already extensive, efforts to find the person or people responsible for the recent anti-alien attacks plaguing the city.

She also makes a mental note to organize a game night for her friends and family after this ordeal is over with because they've all been put through the ringer.

Plus, she muses as she gets closer to Lena's balcony, her CEO girlfriend gets really competitive which is incredibly sexy.

(And she tends to get into arguments with Alex whenever they're playing Scrabble which is just downright hilarious.)

Her thoughts fall away as she lands oh so softly because she can see Lena leaning up on her elbows, sheets halfheartedly held up to cover bare body, and smiling at her with so much love in her spring-green eyes, and Kara's own loving smile blooms because, "wow, how did I get so lucky…?"

She's barely remembered to put the coffee and pastries she picked up while getting some for Maggie down literally anywhere before she's leaning down over the CEO for the morning kiss that'll give her that extra kick for the rest of the day. Never mind that one or the other or both, because she certainly can't tell, is smiling so hard the kiss breaks in giggles.

She never thought she'd be this happy someday.

She knows that Lena probably didn't think so either, if her girlfriend thought she'd be happy ever.

The thought makes Kara's heart swell.

With love that she wants to spend the rest of her life showering Lena with.

With rage at Lillian for everything she's ever done to Lena.

With sadness because how can anyone look at Lena and mistreat her so completely.

And some of her inner turmoil must show on her face, in her eyes, because soon Lena's slipping out of bed and into Kara's button down – leaving it unbuttoned with a cheeky smile – and twirling her finger so Kara turns to offer her back, and delicate fingers are being even more gentle and slow and worshipping as they start unclasping her cape – their own morning ritual that always takes Kara's breath away because it feels so right.

The Super smiles softly as she feels Lena's soft kiss on her shoulder behind her as she bends her knees just so, enough for Lena to be comfortably undoing her cape, picturing the CEO's playful eye roll because, "I'm not actually that much shorter than you, Supergirl."

Their showers are separate this morning because while they're not really late yet, they'll be cutting it really close. Instead, they enjoy a comfortable breakfast just being. And while Kara loves the Danvers' with every fiber of her being and wouldn't ever think of them as anything less than family, she can't help but marvel at the feeling of being utterly whole in moments like this with Lena.

It's the closest she's felt to being on Krypton again.

Except, it's even better.

Because Lena Luthor is also very firmly her home here on Earth; she's the balance between both of Kara's worlds.

She's about to broach the topic of finally revealing their relationship to Kara's friends and family, or at the very least to Alex when duty calls in the form of an irate Snapper Carr, and the DEO's reminder for Supergirl about the bake sale she agreed to go to today, much to Lena's displeasure at having to cancel their lunch date.

Thankfully, the CEO's not immune to Kara's charms and the Super takes full advantage because, "they were so cute, babe, all shy and scuffling their toes in these adorable Supergirl costumes as they asked me if I could come say hi, how could I not say yes? Plus, it's a bake sale; I'm going to get so many cookies! Ooh, maybe you can stop by too!"

So it's with wide smiles softened around the edges, and an obnoxiously cheeky smile as she vaults overhead towards the balcony while serenading her girlfriend with Defying Gravity, that Kara dashes off to save the day either by writing a snappy (she fist bumps herself for that one) article or while flying around in blue tights and a cape, barely zooming back around to drop hurried kiss to Lena's cheek and call out a promise that she'll be careful out there today and that, "It's a bake sale, love, the worst thing that'll happen is me getting a sugar rush. Honestly, what could go wrong?"

Later – much later – Lena makes Kara physically write down a note to never tempt fate like that ever again.

Her first thoughts are of the children crowding her after her landing, of how she's going to protect them.

It's only after having that thought does she actually feel it, and lets out a blood curdling scream as she crumples.

She heard the snap, and feels it inside her, wedged into her muscles as she falls to her back and ends up digging it deeper into herself.

For the first time in a very long time, Kara can't breathe.

Supergirl can't breathe.

She can't because with every rattling breath she tries to gasp in or out she swears she can feel the sharp tip grate against her spine.

She wonders, distantly, about how fast whoever did this was because she didn't even have time to feel sick from the proximity to the Kryptonite let alone hearing her attacker.

So fast.

So unlike the slow death that she's experiencing.

Inhale. Pained gasp as the blade presses into her spine just a little more. Exhale. Pained gasp as the blade presses into her spine just a little more.

Repeat.

The tears form rapidly, from pain or the thought of these scared children watching her die, or from the knowledge that it's too deep in there for anyone to pull out.

If anyone got to her in time.

Perhaps the tears are from the all-consuming unfairness of it all.

Didn't she deserve to be happy for once, dammit?

Her mind is rapidly deteriorating, all thought slowly being replaced by the splitting pain, the scorching fire licking its way through her veins.

Veins that are filled with poisonous green.

Green, like Lena's eyes.

She clings to that, to the memory of Lena and her green eyes.

Eyes that have breathed nothing but love into Kara.

Eyes like spring and creativity and life.

Eyes that make her weak in the knees from happiness, from sadness, from passion.

Eyes that are nothing like Kryptonite but could still very well kill her and she'd welcome it with open arms.

Eyes that she finds her strength in.

So Kara holds on to those thoughts, if for a few more moments, as sirens get closer.

But it's so hard; there is so much pain and she's a sobbing mess because it is overwhelming her senses so much she can't even keep her grasp on the image of Lena in her mind.

Oh, Rao, make it stop, please-

It's Maggie.

Maggie's here and that's a good sign; at least someone will be there, she doesn't have to be alone when-

She's asking things, Maggie is asking her things but all Kara knows is that, "Maggie, it hurts- I can't breathe, Maggie, please-"

She just wants someone to make it stop.

She whimpers because her fingers won't bend like she needs them to so she can grip Maggie's jacket; she can't feel them beyond the searing in her palm.

She can't even bite back her cry of pain as Maggie tries to get to her back to help, murmuring in an attempt to be soothing though failing miserably, "it'll be okay, I've got you, and you're going to be okay…"

Kara knows she's not going to be okay.

She appreciates Maggie's attempts at trying to be strong though, respects it.

Alex is going to need it soon.

She wonders if she can squeeze the words past her clogged throat to ask Maggie to take care of Lena too as she feels the detective ever so gently move her head to her lap, fingers stroking through her hair.

She closes her eyes in pain, mostly, and to avoid having to see the red of her blood stain Maggie Sawyer's fingers.

She's still talking to her, Kara vaguely registers, words too soft to be the truth, but Maggie tells her anyway that, "It's nothing, Supergirl, you're gonna be fine…"

"The DEO will be here any second now, Alex will be here to take even better care of you, just breathe…"

If only Kara was a fool. She'd give anything to be able to believe those words right now.

Someone else is touching her, and it makes her see stars in the worst way imaginable.

Alex.

Kara's breath shudders and she sobs some more and her arm flails stiffly in the hopes of holding her big sister's hand through this – not for her own comfort, because there is no comfort for her anymore, but for Alex because the brunette behind her is hysterical; the hand on her back shaking too much.

A detached disinterested voice in the back of her mind notes that this isn't exactly the most ideal doctor she wants probing around in what is probably a gaping wound in her back.

The same voice notes that the very human detective holding her still isn't struggling to keep the superior alien still like she should, that Kara's getting weaker by the second.

It won't be long now.

She makes Maggie promise to take care of Alex, and she's about to add Lena too when there's a breeze behind her, and Alex's hysterical frantic screams to be let go are farther down from where Kara lies in a pool of her own green-red blood.

Of course that could mean nothing more than Kara's mind shutting down further on her.

But then there's a voice right behind her, and hands that drive- drove her up the wall with their touches are on her back and arm and shoulder and just everywhere, and a murmured, "it'll be over soon, love, I promise, just a few more seconds…" as she feels the cold tool Alex was using again.

This time, the hand's more sure and steady.

It doesn't hurt any less though.

But at least now Lena's there too and Kara can't really think of anyone else she wants with her when-

Well, Kara can't really think at the moment.

She can't see much either; her vision started darkening around the edges a while ago and the blackness just swam inwards her sight is completely gone.

She can't hear much either; nothing beyond her own heart beat slowing in her chest.

She can't smell much either; aside from the coppery smell of her blood mixed in with the rancid effect of the Kryptonite.

She can't feel much either; she wonders if Lena's still touching her, if Maggie is still running bloody fingers in her hair, if she herself is still holding on to the detective's knees.

She's not eating anything, but if she were, she's sure it'd probably taste like sand. Assuming she could taste even that.

It's an eternity, waiting for death.

A death which doesn't come, not just yet, because suddenly she feels an agonizingly slow pull and she's left gasping and shaking in Maggie's lap, gagging a little as the cold sharp nails of sweet, sweet oblivion that were clawing at her spine recede.

She feels trembling hands on her shoulder and bicep, a forehead pressed against her in controlled sagging relief.

She feels more comforting nails lightly scratching at her scalp, a shaky breath inhaled and exhaled overhead.

She feels frantic hands and lips on her face, a desperate voice apologizing and telling her she'll take care of her better back at the DEO.

And then she feels nothing.

It's quiet when she blinks, and she feels the tug of her cells towards the sunlamps overhead.

The quiet is only disturbed by her own ragged breath, so soft she's sure she herself wouldn't have heard it if it weren't for her super hearing.

But maybe she's been out long enough for humans to become Super too because apparently the two women in the room heard her loud and clear.

The grief in their eyes threatens to drown Kara and she can't help but want to wipe it clean, along with the tears she sees falling, so she takes in another ragged breath and swallows against the sandpaper lining her throat and musters a weak but still-brighter-than-the-sun smile, murmuring about, "My two favorite girls. What more can a girl ask for to wake up to?"

She slips her eyes shut again from the sheer exhaustion she's feeling still, smile serene as Alex laughs a watery chuckle, as Lena's ramrod straight back and stony expression finally melts away and makes way for her sobs to break loose, Kara swallowing thickly again as she feels those soft strands of raven hair against the hand trapped in Lena's strong grip, barely managing to twist her fingers enough to scratch the CEO's scalp soothingly.

She knows she should address the fact that Lena Luthor is distraught over Supergirl, that she clearly knows the hero and the reporter are one in the same, that she has some explaining to do.

But the harder Lena sobs, the less Kara seems to care as she tiredly tugs her up onto the bed she's been laid on. And Lena doesn't have it in her to fight or pretend nor does she really want to as she tries to get into Kara's arms without hurting the blonde.

Alex wordlessly helps secure Lena in her baby sister arms and cape.

And Kara lays there, murmuring soft nothings into Lena's hair as the Luthor shakes in her arms, takes Lena's hand in hers and lets her thumb caress the delicate inside of Lena's wrist, cooperates with all of Alex's tests to ease Lena's mind.

It doesn't last more than 90 minutes before Kara's itching to get up and leave already because, "I'm fine, guys, honest. You said I've been out for days, I've had more than enough time to heal otherwise I wouldn't be awake yet. Besides, wouldn't real sunshine be better? I think it would be, I'm gonna go get some-"

And she's up and swinging her legs around, studiously ignoring Alex's protests and attempts to get her back in bed, studiously avoiding looking at Lena because if she does it'll break her heart and her resolve.

Turns out, she doesn't need to look at Lena to lose a fight.

Turns out, all it takes if for Lena's perfect hand – scrubbed raw for days to get the visual of her girlfriend's blood off – to settle on the House of El's coat of arms that she wears on her chest, and for her to stand so intimately close and press her forehead against the blonde's temple.

"Please, love…"

Turns out, you don't need Kryptonite to render Supergirl helpless.

You just need two broken words whispered in the barely-there space between two lips.