Hell's One: Serenity/Pandemonium or The Song Of Solemn - Letter #1

In another parallel universe...

This is a collection of three different letters.

I've come to you again, O' vast eye.

Each time I've wrapped a universe with the chains of my resentment, I've just craved to do something as simple as painting my thoughts on a canvas.

That canvas is a poem.

So full of hatred, yet I'm obsessed with literature.

Perhaps this is my serenity, perhaps also my form of pandemonium. I also title this to be my Song of Solemn, not to be confused with the Song of Solomon; however, I do in fact find that use of poetry to be quite fascinating as well.

Amongst all rubble, peace discovers itself in a minuscule bubble.

Though I have won and conquered, amidst the battles, I have sauntered.

I find no pleasures within the thirst of blood, for I find myself to be empty when faced with the void that is "victory".

For when I hold a sword, zilch of my pride is restored.

One wishes for completion, yet I wish for nothing more but to restore my conception.

I dance.

I dance.

I dance.

I dance, hoping that one day that joy shall remove the shadows.

Ever since I was a kid, I found joy in my pillows; delicate and lukewarm.

I found joy within the view of the clouds, for it was clear.

My pride and vanity, it was never near.

So it seems that making one bite the dust just adds another pebble to the sands of grief.

Why find hope in myself when I am responsible for removing the hope within those who surround me?

I achieved, yet I grieved.

I dance.

I dance.

I dance.

I dance, hoping this treacherous run of nothing but murder halts.

Like a dog returning to its vomit, I stay true to my duty.

Within that world they claimed to be perfect, I found no beauty.

René Descartes once said "I think; therefore, I am".

I wish to be nothing like him.

I wish to doubt my existence, though I am absolute.

Absoluteness creates the cries for doubtful thought.

Curse me and my sinful heart!

I find myself to be quite the hypocrite, for I do find joy.

Joy in sin.

Joy in failure when faced with temptation.

Joy in darkness, where shadows dance in the night, yet in my heart, I know what's wrong and what's right.

Joy in the deprivation of light.

Joy in pandemonium, for that's where the absence of serenity lies.

I find my neck to be wrapped in chains…chains of resentment.

I can never find a candle within a dark room.

Hopelessness suffocates where melancholy resides.

In failure, happiness it never provides.

I dance.

I dance.

I dance.

I dance, hoping that I find my serenity and peace, perhaps with a knife, once again, I shall know life.

O' how they speak of peace.

In shadows' embrace, seeking solace without cease.

Who shall know of the occurrence of coincidences?

Perhaps the absolute?

Perhaps those who know of omnipresence?

No matter, for we all live in the flow of calamity.

It matters not if I get impaled in the eye, or if an arm is severed, for I possess insanity.

The flow of thoughts within my mind is not of a stereotypical ocean, it more resembles that of a typhoon.

I can never choose.

Serenity or pandemonium?

I speak of both, much like a fool.

I no longer am able to comprehend what's comprehensible, for I operate solely on insanity.

Oh but never blame me, blame calamity!

That natural flow flows like an imbecile!

Like a hypocrite!

I don't reside within the shadows of the night, I simply got pushed into it.

To fate, we're like cattle receiving a label, and it's up to fate whether it's rotten or not.

Fate makes futility of all thought.

Oh but never blame me, blame calamity!

I too have faced the consequences.

Serenity or pandemonium?

You too shall make a choice.

Is it wrong to shatter the blade of others within a battle?

I think not!

For it is nothing but self-defense.

I despise, yet I adore.

I can never decide.

I thought that I found no purpose in being the embodiment of hatred, for I thought it was dated.

Within every universe I reside.

I've been, am, and always will be a fool.

Oh but don't blame me, I'm not cruel.

I dance.

I dance.

I dance.

I dance, hoping that you are satisfied.

So, what shall it be?

The flowers of serenity?

Or pandemonium it shall be?

So be it

便如此吧

Así sea

तो हो

Ainsi soit-il

Così sia

So sei es

Sic fiat

Sincerely, ?#&*@$!