Broken heart

The last raindrops fall with a soft thud from the green-colored leaves. Here and there a warm sunbeam peeks through the trees their leaf crowns. Early birds whistle their most beautiful song as they settle on the mossy roof. The warm sunlight awakens Katara abruptly. The pale sun shining through the roof heralds a new day. Covering her naked body, she sits up. She is all alone in the chilly cabin. Reki has left. Without saying anything, before she woke up. Why does that hurt her so? What did she expect? "Oh, Katara what have you done stupid girl" she whispers to herself. Nobleman, she thinks mockingly as she closes her eyes. She sighs and lets her head fall into her hands. "Come on Katara, just forget him" she says softly and grabs her clothes. It's a new day...

A warm summer breeze slowly sweeps away the April whims to make way for a chilly autumn breeze. The trees lose their leaves as the animals prepare for a long hibernation. Despite her still grieving heart, Katara had moved on with her life. As if nothing had happened. But something had happened. And no matter what she tells herself, she can't forget him. She often thinks back to Reki.. His bright eyes and what it felt like to stare into those ponds.

Walking to the little village of Maranwe ,she curses herself. It has gotten colder, winter is approaching. Sighing, she hides her bulging belly under a thick cloak and squeezes herself among the crowd to the right market stall. "One honey jar please," Katara asks politely. The trader smiles softly and hands her two jars. "That's two ponds and 4 shilling. And the second one comes from the house, to ease your suffering" he winks warmly. Gratefully Katara pays and leaves the stall again. That whole trip. For a pot of honey, she thinks with a sigh. Her stream of thoughts is interrupted when a familiar image appears in the corner of her eye. That tunic. She'd seen him before. The virginal white that stuck out against the gray sky. The four red lilies on his back and chest, the brown leather weapon belt. That is. She stares intently at the knight. "Impossible" she mumbles slightly irritated.

The crusader is talking to a young maidservant and unaware of Katara making her way towards him. Katara takes a moment to think. Would she give him a chance? Would she let him explain his disappearance? Don't be stupid Katara, what is he going to explain. He flirts with another girl she bites herself. But what stops him? Four months had passed. Why shouldn't he move on? Why couldn't she? Was it because of the baby? No, there was more than the baby. Katara had lost her heart that night. Despite her stubborn denials, she had fallen in love with the knight. They had shared a true love kiss. That had saved him. She couldn't just let him slip away. But then again? She fell in love when he threw himself before her. His heroism, bravery, and nobility had made Katara's heart race. And all that, all those feelings. Were gone when she awoke alone. At least she thought so. There was something left that kept drawing her to the brave warrior. Her heart wouldn't let go of him just like that. But if he didn't share this, she had no choice. Perhaps she just needed to hear the words out of his mouth before she could go on. Was that what she wanted to hear? Anyway, she needs to have a conversation with him. She has to tell him about the baby. He deserved to know that he would become a father.

Anger reappears in Katara when she sees his hand slide down the virgin's cheek. Without warning, she takes a bystander's cup and empties it over Reki's head. Startled, he retracts his neck and turns around indignantly. His hand rests on the silver tip of his dagger as an angry look reflects in his eyes. Katara doesn't know what annoys him most, his fellow knights laughing out loud, the girl walking away grinning, or the cold water on his head. "I would almost think you don't recognize me anymore. And somehow this doesn't surprise me," she blows irritated. Reki looks tensely at Katara. "Oh Reki, No. You really didn't" laughs his squire next to him as soon as he sees Katara's belly. "I, no," defends Reki; "not at all." "Are you sure? I'm not," Katara hisses angrily. "Shut up" Reki whispers and places his hand over her mouth. "Come on," he hisses, pulling her out of the crowd who stare at them with a smile. "Bravo, Reki" laughs his partner and gives him an encouraging pat on the back. "Not now Ward" Reki curses softly. Why did he have to make her pregnant?! Why couldn't she just leave him behind?

"What do you want?" "Do I really have to explain that to you? You were drunk, I believe." "Be quiet!" "Why?" "Because ... because I'm here with my clan." "And? May they not know that you cannot bear beer!" Reki sighs and looks at her. "How much do you need?" "What? Do you think you can just bribe me? Forget that!" " What do you want me to do?" "I want you to take responsibility." "Come on Reki, I can't do this alone. Why were you gone that morning? I thought we had something. Something more." Reki looks deep into her eyes. A loving smile curls around his lips. Katara looks into his heavenly ponds and grabs his strong hand. "Come on Reki, we can do this. Let's try it." She strokes his fingers gently and rests her hand on his shaggy knuckles. Reki smiles soft and places his other hand on her belly. Katara smiles again. The baby in her stomach reacts on his touch.

Most of all Reki wants to tell her what he feels, he wants to help her... Help them. But the headmasters would hunt them as sheep. They wouldn't be safe anywhere. If he wants to give them the best chance, they must move on... Without him. As painful as this is for him. Why are the right choices always the hardest? He can't risk their lives. Yet this was really what he wants A family, ... And he would love to meet his son or daughter. He could already imagine their life. It was going to be so beautiful. The first steps, the first words. Maybe even the first braids. It was all so wonderful... But it can't be. No matter how much he craves it. It's selfish. It's his duty to protect them. Keep them away from war. They deserve freedom. It's selfish for dragging them in. And no, it wasn't her fault. But she is a witch. And she is who she is. And he can't change her. He loves her as she is. But the world is sometimes unfair. And he can't just leave the knights just like that. No, this is not a multiple-choice option. He can't be a part of their lives. Their lives are worth all the tears. All the pain. But how can he tell her this isn't her fault? That she has to live without him? How can he make sure she won't follow him? Will not seek him? There was only one way to make sure she would never look for him again. To make sure everything would be okay.

The smile has disappeared from Reki's lips. "Reki" Katara repeats. Reki turns his eyes to her and swallows. "This is not going to happen. It is impossible, it is not allowed and above all dangerous, and you have to." He can barely get the words past his lips. He doesn't want her to forget him. He doesn't want to be forgotten by the only woman he ever loved. "You must forget me," he says. "What?" Katara asks indignantly. "Reki!" Reki pushes her arm back causing her to fall to the ground. Sighing, he closes his eyes when Katara falls on her back in shock. "You idiot" she yells. Reki sighs and looks at her. He holds out his hand hesitantly, but she knocks it away. "How dare you abuse me like that," Katara growls softly at him. "I never saw you, it's best that you say this too" he replies hurt, and turns around. But Katara doesn't want to stop there, she wants to make sure he never forgets her.

She places a broken wood splinter in her palm and closes her eyes. The sharp wood glows golden when Katara says the words; "Uann bren Or Glaeth. "Reki" she yells and taps his shoulder. With a swift movement, she lets the splinter slide past his right eye. A deep scratch appears over his eye socket. A slight growl escapes his throat as the magic drips into his wound. His clear blood is black and red. "Ah, you dirty!!" "Hey, we're not going to do that" shout two knights and quickly grab Reki's arms when he wants to grab her. Katara recoils in shock when she sees the impact of her spell. Too late. "I'd disappear if I were you," Ward whispers, clearly struggling with Reki's power. One last time, Katara glances at Reki's bright eyes, this time filled with hate... Katara sighs and makes her way to her house. For starters, this wasn't worth the fight, and she's no match for the trained warrior. Nor would she stand a chance, she still has too much to learn. All she could do was accept that she has to do this alone. Why did she think she needed him anyway? Why was she only now realizing that he was actually right? It wasn't like he forced her. He had broken her confidence, yes. But she had asked for it herself. She kissed him. She now sees that besides the fact that he left her alone with a child... he had indeed done nothing cruel. Other than the fact that she was going to be a single mother, she couldn't blame him. Single mother. That sounds so. So lonely. Can she actually raise a child? And most importantly, she can raise a child on her own. Maybe she should give up the child? Deep in thought, she stumbles on through the forest. A withered branch cracks behind her, revealing a presence. Distrustfully, she looks back and peers at the misty edge of the dense forest.

The bleak wind plays with her cape as she searches intently for a shadow that shouldn't be there. Her heart races through her chest when someone abruptly grabs her. Screaming, she protests and fights the strong hands that cling to her body. "Shh" a familiar voice silences her before the grip on her slender arms disappears. Startled, Katara turns around. Reki... Hesitantly, she steps back. She has no idea where he comes from nor how he is able to sneak up on her like that. Confused, she stares at the cut on his face. Why is he here? Why had he followed her? Bravely she pulls herself together and raises her chin. "I don't want to hear anything more than an apology from you," she begins stubbornly. Reki smiles amusedly and steps over to her. Katara's heart rate rises as she steps back. Her eyes dart back and forth nervously, looking for a way out. Whatever he's up to. Why he came. It can't be anything good. Her distrust turns to fear as he gets closer and closer. "Shh, don't be afraid. I swear to you. I really don't want to hurt you," he whispers. A playful smile appears on his face when Katara bumps her back against an old tree. Katara shakes her head gently. "Reki" she begins. She swallows and tries to take the shiver out of her voice. "Wh.. Why are you here?" "Don't you know that?" he whispers and places his hands on her upper arms. Katara looks again at his wound. A dark shadow rests under his eyes. She has used an innocent spell, a spell to sharpen the splinter so it can cut through its skin. But now. Now she doubts the innocence of this spell. What if this had caused something worse? Something like a character change? The Reki she knew would never go after her. Not like this. Reki's grip tightens as he moves closer to her. "Reki" she shivers. "Shh" Reki soothes and places his lips on her neck. Hopelessly she makes an effort to push him away from her. "Shh" soothes Reki again and grabs her tight. "No" she protests scared as he pulls her back against his chest. "You asked for this, you wanted so badly to accuse me," he whispers and continues, "Now you have something to accuse me of." "No", she screams loudly and tries to slip out of his arms. Katara is no match for the strong arm that rests around her waist. Tears sparkle in Katara's eyes as his soft hand glides over her hip. "Reki, please," Katara begs softly. Tormented, she lets out a crying cry as soon as she feels his penis penetrate. "You asked for this" echoes in her head again. In fact, he was right. She had challenged him. Why also? Why had she sharpened the wood with a forbidden spell? It seems as if the honorable knight is cursed.

Listening to his breathing, she whimpers again and again. The strong muscles in his arm, protected with chainmail, are getting tighter and tighter. "Reki I can't breathe anymore" she begs hopelessly but Reki doesn't listen. Finally, he stops and lets her go. Broken, she sits on the forest floor, tears streaming from her eyes. She's not sure if Reki is still there. It doesn't interest her. She needs a moment to get herself back together. "No" she whimpers as he grabs her again. "You better watch out. Before you call someone an abuser again," he whispers viciously in her ear and disappears into the rising fog.

As the cold slowly increases, Katara immerses herself in the ancient magic. The months pass slowly as do the countless books she reads. Hopelessly searching for the right power... Desperate as she was, she had called on Isobelle for help. She was desperate for strength. For revenge. And to get her revenge, she must learn the dark magic and read the forbidden book. Despite the fact that everyone warned about the ancient forbidden spells, Katara doesn't give up. She knows it was partly her fault. But like then. So vulnerable. So scared. She never wanted to feel that way again. She had exchanged her love, her weakness, for hate. There had even been a moment of regret. Regret she hadn't let the Crusader die. As with Isobelle, Selina had her back turned to her. "Nobody can save you when you use this book. Dark magic is bad and you know it," she had said. And while Katara had laughed this off, Selina had walked away. No reason. Just like she had with Isobelle. Selina had abandoned both her sisters. Because she thought dark magic was good for nothing. But Katara knows better. At least she thought so. Just as Isobelle had told her, dark magic would be the answer. All she wanted was to rock him to sleep. Not just any sleep. A sleeping curse would be too easy for him. No, she wanted to give him a restless sleep.

Just like he had given Katara. She would make sure that no one could help him anymore. No true love kiss, no good magician... When she's done with him, he would be in the deepest caves of hell. At least that was her idea. To her relief, she finally finds the appropriate curse in the forbidden book of shadows. She learns the hellish curse with satisfaction. The curse is what she's looking for. Not looking at the warnings, she studies the forbidden words. Now it's just a matter of waiting. Wait for her to meet him again. No doubt he won't be in the same village again, but she would find him. Ever. As she drills the right words into her head, she feels the power flowing into her body. The darkness everyone warned about is planting itself in her body. It's dangerous claws, wrapped tightly around her heart where it will settle for eternity...