72. Chapter 72

"Does that help?" Jody asked, some two hours later.

Castiel blinked at her. "Yes?" he said uncertainly. The list she'd given him was quite long, and he wasn't sure if there was enough time to do everything before Christmas, but she explained everything thoroughly and he appreciated it. Bobby chuckled at his answer, and even Jody smiled.

"Like I said, you don't have to do it all. Pick what you think Dean would like best," Jody said, leaning back in her chair and finishing off the remainder of her second beer. "The best thing about Christmas, Cas, is that you're spending time and doing things with the people you love. That's what matters the most. If you don’t know what Dean would like best, then you may want to ask him. He might even remember some of the things that his family used to do. Before the fire, I mean."

"Probably not," Bobby said. "Kid was only four when his mom died. That's pretty young."

Jody shrugged. "Kids will surprise you sometimes, and it's not like you can ask Mary Winchester what her family's traditions were."

Oh. Castiel sat up straight. "But I can!" he exclaimed, causing Bobby and Jody to stare at him. "I could visit her in heaven."

"You can do that?" Jody leaned forward intently.

"Well, yes. We were never supposed to, but Gabriel is in charge of heaven now. I'm sure he wouldn't mind."

"That idiot in charge," Bobby muttered. "Makes me glad I won't be dying for a while."

"Not so long as you watch your blood pressure, no," Jody said, giving him a playful nudge. She turned back to Castiel. "If you can, I think you should. Imagine how happy Dean would be if you could tell him that you were doing the same things that his mom's family did!"

"Dean will be happy no matter what," Bobby said.

"Of course he will be. But this is special. Traditions matter to some people, Singer. Not everyone ignores the holidays like you do," said Jody. In spite of her words, she set a gentle hand on Bobby's arm and squeezed. "We're celebrating this year whether you like it or not. I've already asked Sam to come stay with us, and I've been planning to ask you, Dean and Gabriel as well, Cas. I'm sure the boys will want to see each other, and this way you won't have to worry about bringing Sam or anyone else to your nest."

"Thank you," Castiel said, smiling at her. "We accept." He wouldn't have minded Sam coming to the nest, but he didn’t think that Dean wasn't ready for that. For that matter, he didn't think that Sam was either. This would solve their problem nicely.

"We'll let you know the details. Sam hadn't quite worked out when he'll be done with school," Jody said. "He didn't know his exam schedule yet."

Castiel nodded and stood. "Thanks. And thank you for your help today. I understand traditions and Christmas better now."

"Good luck," Bobby said, and Jody smiled at him.

"If you need more help, we're only a call away," she said.

With a smile back to them, and a nod in acknowledgement of Jody's kind words, Castiel spread his wings and flew away. But he wasn't returning to the nest. Not yet. Instead, he flew up. As Gabriel's second in command, he could open a portal to heaven wherever he desired. Castiel did so now, flying through the portal and emerging into the place he'd once thought of as home. Now, home was where Dean and Gabriel and Sparks were. Home was a little nest in a cabin in the middle of the woods, heavily warded and made as safe as possible. Home was a hatchling with copper wings and green eyes and a sweet smile.

Gabriel's grace brushed against him curiously, wondering what he was doing in heaven. Castiel explained as he made his way towards Mary Winchester's piece of heaven. What he'd learned from Jody and Bobby was probably enough - but he was determined to make Christmas everything Dean dreamt of, and that meant following up on whatever scraps of information he could get. Frankly, he was a little embarrassed that he or Gabriel hadn't thought of visiting Mary first. They were angels, but sometimes it was easy to forget that when they spent so much time on Earth.

Mary Wichester's heaven was a small house in a small town that she shared with a perpetually four-year-old Dean Winchester and six-month-old Sam Winchester. Noticeably absent from their heaven was John Winchester. Castiel alighted on the porch and looked at the green-eyed child playing in the yard. Seeing the innocence and happiness on Dean's young face made him feel warm from his toes to the tips of his wings. It was a look, he realized, that he'd seen on his Dean's face many times over.

"Who's there?" Mary called out. The door opened seconds later and she stuck her head out. Her eyes widened when she saw him.

"Hello, Mrs. Winchester. I am -"

"Castiel," Mary breathed, and Castiel blinked at her in surprise.

"How did you know my name?" he asked, confused.

Mary folded her arms across her chest, staring at him warily but not threateningly. "There have been rumblings in heaven," she said. "Michael is dead, and the archangel Gabriel now has control. Gabriel and his closest brother... the angel Castiel."

"That's true," Castiel said. "But that doesn't explain how you knew it was me. I could've been any angel."

"Angels don't typically come to the human side of heaven," Mary said wryly. "Besides... I've been watching over you and my Dean for months now."

Castiel stared at her, genuinely shocked. "What?"

"Why don't you come in for some tea?" Mary said, pushing the door open fully. She disappeared inside, and Castiel felt that he had no choice but to follow her. He walked into a home that was tastefully decorated. Signs of children were all over the place: toys on the floor, pictures pinned up on the walls, a bassinet in the corner. There was a baby sleeping inside. Castiel moved over to it, looking down at the memory of Sam. Here was a look he'd never seen before. Sam was so peaceful. Castiel memorized the expression, if only so he could show it to Gabriel later.

"He's beautiful," Castiel said, sensing Mary's eyes on them.

"Yes, they both are." Mary smiled faintly and beckoned him into the kitchen. When they were both at the table, she continued: "Up until about two years ago, I was just like any other human in heaven. I didn't even consciously know I was dead. Not until the day a young woman literally crashed into me while I was helping Dean rake some leaves. She'd been searching for me, she said. She had a way for me to see my sons, if I wanted to. I didn't know until that moment just how desperately I wanted to."

"This young woman..."

Mary smiled. "She said her name was Jo."

Jo. Castiel remembered the young woman with the long blonde hair and the dark eyes well. Dean and Sam had been crushed after Jo and Ellen died. "I don't understand. This is supposed to be impossible."

"They have a friend, Ash, who can move into other people's heavens at will. He explained the theory to me, but I have to admit it was too complicated for me to follow. He'd been looking for me for a long time, but he said it was like my heaven was hidden from him and he couldn't find it until Michael was gone."

"That's... entirely possible," Castiel admitted, his thoughts spinning. He hadn’t known that it was possible for humans to move between heavens. But if he’d learned anything from Sam and Dean, it was that humans had the ability to consistently surprise him. He thought suddenly of how much that must have irritated Michael and couldn’t stop himself from grinning.

Mary beamed at him, her eyes twinkling like Dean’s did when Dean was feeling mischievous. “I’ve enjoyed it, actually. I love my heaven, but sometimes it’s nice to have a change. And it’s so comforting to be able to see what’s going down below. Ash showed me how to get to the Roadhouse whenever I want. I go sometimes and watch over Sammy and Dean. And that means I’ve been watching over you too.”

“I didn’t know,” Castiel said, feeling a flicker of nerves. This was Dean’s mother. If anyone had reason to cast judgment on how things had been going –

“I was hoping you’d come see me someday so that I could say thank you.”

Castiel looked at her in surprise. Mary stared back, all traces of amusement gone from her face. Now her expression was serious, mouth pursed into a thin line, and he realized how much Dean ressembled her. Her hair was a lighter shade of blond than Dean’s, but they had the same stubborn chin and rounded cheekbones and nose. Even their eyes were the same, not just the shape but that deep green color that had haunted Castiel on many nights. The realization left him speechless, and Mary took the opportunity to lean forward.

“You’ve protected both my boys countless times,” she said quietly. “You pulled Dean out of hell when I thought he might be lost forever. And now you’ve spent so much time trying to heal the damage that’s been done to his soul. Thank you, Castiel from the bottom of my heart.”

He wasn’t sure what to say in the face of such open gratitude, yet silence didn’t seem like the right answer. Slowly, he said, “I care about Dean and Sam. Dean especially.”

“I know you do. I’m so grateful that you’ve been there for him. Dean…” Mary looked away at the windows. Castiel followed her gaze and saw that the four-year-old version of Dean was easily visible from where they sat, still busily playing.

“Dean was always my sensitive soul,” Mary said unsteadily. “I’ve seen their childhood. I saw what my husband did. I understand why he did it, but I don’t agree with his methods. That’s why we don’t share a heaven. He raised my babies to be hunters, even though he knew I got out of that life for a reason. That wasn’t the life I wanted for them.” A tear ran down her cheek. She sniffed and raised a shaking hand to her cheek. “I’m sorry. You came here to ask me a question and I’m getting all emotional.”

“It’s okay,” Castiel said. “I… I know Dean had a very difficult childhood and sometimes I wish he could’ve been spared that. But… then I think that if he hadn’t, I wouldn’t have met him.”

Mary’s smile was small. “Yes, I often think the same. And make no mistake, you’re the best thing that ever happened to my little boy. I’m so glad that he has you. I’m glad that you’ve made him yours. Dean needed that. He hasn’t belonged to anyone since I died.” She reached across the table and took his hand. Her hand was small, but she gripped with surprising strength.

“I want to bring him to see you someday, when he can safely visit heaven,” Castiel told her.

“I would like that,” Mary whispered, patting his arm with her free hand. “I’d like that very much.”

“We can bring Sam too, eventually,” he added.

“My stubborn Sammy.” Mary’s smile was back to normal, her eyes shining. “I want to ask you so much, but I don’t want to keep you from them. I believe you came to ask me about Christmas?”

“Yes. I want to make sure it’s a good one for Dean.”

“I’ll tell you what you want to know,” she said, “so long as you promise to ignore Sam’s stubbornness and make him participate. I know he’s not ready to be a nestling yet. I get that. But he needs this, Castiel. He needs Gabriel the way Dean needs you. He just doesn’t understand it yet. I need you to make sure he does. The more he sees you and Dean together, the more he’s going to want what you have.”

“I’m getting used to ignoring the stubborness of Winchesters,” Castiel said. “We’ll be together at Bobby’s house. Sam will be exposed to us a lot, and I don’t imagine Gabriel will let him escape without some degree of fussing.”

“Good,” Mary said with a satisifed nod. “Now, Christmas. My family always used to buy advent calendars. Dean only ever had one, the year before I died, but he loved it…”