12.Gringotts Owns Lucius

It was several days after the canceled second task and Harry and Hermione were once again at breakfast in the Great Hall. They were talking about a Transfiguration assignment between smiles and small kisses when a blue sleeved arm reached between them and laid a wand down on the table. Looking up they both saw Fleur Delacour standing there. Both Harry and Hermione pulled their wands out quickly.

"Mademoiselle Granger," the part Veela champion said in a soft tone. "I 'ave come to apologize. I've given you my wand to prove I 'ave no ill will. Eet ees up to you to decide if you return it."

Hermione eyed the Beauxbatons witch carefully and finally nodded and said, "I'm listening."

Fleur's eyes blinked as she seemed to want to look away, but she held them firm looking into Hermione's. "I… I... did you and Monsieur Potter wrong after ze Yule Ball. I admit zinking I could steal your boyfriend's affections and didn't consider or even dezire to consider yours or 'is feelings in ze matter," Fleur paused to catch her breath as wetness showed in her eyes. "Zanks to you, I've 'ad a long time to zink about a lot of zings. Everyone says you are ze smartest witch in ze school."

"I wouldn't…" Hermione started.

"But everyone else would," Harry said to her, causing Hermione to blush.

"Zen you're obviously familiar with ze idea of having ze power to do somezing can corrupt your zoughts into believing you 'ave ze right to do zat zing."

"I am very familiar with it," Hermione replied. "In the muggle world, there was a Lord Acton who, in denying that the Pope, which is a religious leader, was infallible, gave a speech in which a quote that even today stands alone in its understanding. It simply says, 'Power tends to corrupt, absolute power corrupts absolutely'."

"Exactly, Mademoiselle," Fleur replied. "I 'ave abilities zat allow me to do certain zings, and I fell under zat trap. I would like to say I zink I am a better person now. I see ze love your beaux 'as for you, and wish now to find someone who cares for me as much without influence of my powers. For somezing real."

Hermione studied the Beauxbatons witch, looking for any duplicity in her tone or actions. After staring at her for a minute or so, she finally replied, "Miss Delacour, what you did was beyond reprehensible and it will take more than a simple apology to make up for it. However, I actually believe what you are saying is true and you do want to be a better person."

"Zank you."

Hermione looked at the wand laying on the table before turning back to Fleur. "But you have to apologize to more than just me. I will give your wand to your Headmistress. I will request that only when you and your fellow student, I think her name is Michelle, appear together requesting it, is she to return it to you."

"But my..." Fleur had started to complain that she would need her wand to continue her studies but immediately stopped and considered. She looked over at the Ravenclaw table where her fellow students were sitting, some of whom were staring at her and quite possibly hoping to see her do something foolish. Fleur knew that she had to do it, and she would be subject to some harsh responses from her schoolmates. She turned back to Hermione and with a nod, agreed. "Zat's fair."

"If I hear that you attack them as a Veela, I will also teach them the spell I cast upon you earlier," Hermione continued.

Again, Fleur nodded and turned to start walking away. Then she turned back one more time and said quietly, "Zank you." Then another question came to her. "Can I turn into a Veela and attack ze fourth champion if 'e slaps my derrière again?"

"Ron?"

"Yes, zat is 'is name."

"As long as you don't kill him," Hermione replied and could have sworn a look of disappointment crossed Fleur's face. A little later that day she and Harry walked to the Beauxbatons carriage where she discussed the matter with Madame Maxime and also talked to Michelle where she requested that the young Beauxbatons witch judge Fleur on her sincerity of wanting to change rather than past injuries inflicted.

It was three weeks later that Hermione saw Michelle and Fleur walking together talking to each other. When they saw Hermione, Fleur and Michelle smiled at her and Fleur raised her hand showing her wand in it. Hermione returned their smile and nodded to the two French witches before continuing to her class.

xXxXxXx

The Weasley twins followed up the second task by introducing the waddling, fire breathing, golden egg laying duck figurine along with Ducky Delights. Ducky Delights were delightful tasting toffee that transforms the eater of the treat into a fire breathing duck. Fred and George gave several boxes to Ron with the appropriate compulsion charms on them. It was rare not to see an overly large duck roasting his own food in the Great Hall for several days afterwards.

xXxXxXx

Lucius Malfoy was once again drinking heavily of Ogden's Finest. He'd just had to sell some of his hidden dark art collection to Borgin and Burkes that he had recently purchased. He had spent almost all of his gold for the collection, but knew that he could sell it for two to three times the amount of purchase once the Dark Lord had returned and the devices were not illegal anymore. He had, of course, had to sell to pay the monthly payment for the loan he had taken out from the goblins at Gringotts to cover the price of the betrothal agreement to that damn toad lady and to pay his bill to Ogden's distillery. 'My son's betrothed left everything to...' Lucius gnashed his teeth in memory of Umbridge's will.

"I leave my entire estate to the Ministry in hopes they use it to improve the conditions of the Dementors of Azkaban as I have found they are the only beings that I have ever felt a kindred toward. Their icy cold, soul sucking abilities always brings a warm feeling to my heart."

Lucius slammed down his glass, causing it to shatter. He had just cleaned up the mess himself ('Damn that Potter brat for freeing my servant!') and was still seething when an official looking owl started tapping on his window. The senior Malfoy quickly realized it was a Gringotts owl. 'What do they want?' He asked himself. 'I paid them on time.' Malfoy knew the dangers of reneging on a goblin-based loan instrument. He opened the window and took the letter and read.

Lucius Malfoy,

The loan you received from us on the tenth of February of this year is now in default. You have failed to pay the required monthly payment constituting one twelfth of the principle and the accrued interest. The entire loan amount is now due in full, including all loan interest that would have accrued during the term of the loan. Please present yourself tomorrow at Gringotts to pay your debt in full.

Gorpus

Default Loan Collector

Lucius stared at the letter for a few minutes before the outrage took him over. 'How dare they accuse me of defaulting on my loan? I would never do such thing if there was a chance of being caught!' He thought. 'Tomorrow, I'll go talk to this Gorpus and straighten him out.' Lucius pulled out another glass and continued his drinking. His mind continued to churn over various problems in his life.

'My liquid assets are almost gone.' He looked down at his bottle of Firewhisky. 'Speaking of which, time to get a new bottle of this liquid asset.' He crossed the room and opened his liquor cabinet. He pulled out a new bottle of Firewhisky and, just as he was about close it, he decided it might be better to go ahead and have two bottles. He reached in a grabbed the second bottle as well. Once he was settled back in his favorite chair, his mind turned back to his problems. 'My liquid assets are almost gone because of the dark magic collection I just purchased, my investments are crap, the Dark Lord is coming back, my wife hasn't slept with me in almost fifteen years and my son is gay and getting more sex with an old friend of mine than I get with my wife.' It took both bottles to sooth Lucius' nerves that evening.

The next day, Lucius Malfoy made his way to Diagon Alley and quickly strolled into Gringotts, his cane tapping the ground with every second step. As he crossed the wide expanses, goblin after goblin raised their heads to stare at the wizard whose cane was causing the tapping noise. Every time it came in contact with the marble floor, the tap echoed throughout the lobby. Goblins everywhere were losing the count of galleons because of it. Lucius finally found the shortest line, only to find it was manned by the slowest goblin. All the other lines moved much more rapidly. After waiting in line for almost an hour, he finally reached the teller stand.

"How may I help you today, wizard?" The goblin snarled as he looked down from his lofty seat at Lucius.

"I have need to speak to..." Lucius looked down that the parchment he had received the previous day, "Loan Collector Gorpus."

"May I see the letter?" The teller asked.

Lucius handed over the letter and, after a quick perusal by the teller, he noticed the teller make a quick hand motion. Immediately, he found three armed goblins surrounding him. "What is the meaning of this!" Malfoy snarled.

"You have been found in default of a loan, Mister Malfoy. That is a very serious offense to the goblins in general and especially those in this bank. This is to make sure you do not leave Gringotts without settling your affairs with us. Now please make your way down that corridor and Gorpus' office is the fourth door on the right."

Malfoy's hand tightened around the knob of his cane, which was also his wand, as he glared at the pompous teller. When he hadn't moved in twenty seconds or so, he felt the point of a goblin borne spear touch him in the back. His hand loosened on the cane and he turned and made his way to the correct office.

"Come in, Mister Malfoy," the goblin behind the desk said when Lucius opened the door to an office. "I'm goblin Gorpus, Default Loan Collector of Gringotts." The Goblin looked past the blond-haired Malfoy as if looking for something. "No trunks of Galleons?" He asked. "I specifically stated in the letter that you must pay the entire amount to fulfill your debt to this bank."

"I dispute that I am in default," Malfoy sneered at the goblin. "I made my payment on time just last week."

"Hmmm..." Gorpus hummed thoughtfully. "I have your records right here. You attempted to pay twenty thousand galleons last week. That money was returned to your vault because it did not cover the amount due."

"WHAT!" Malfoy roared but quickly quieted down when two spear points touched his back rather sharply. After a look back at the guards who had the spears touching him, he turned back to Gorpus and continued. "Twenty thousand galleons was more than what I owed. I calculated it myself. One twelfth of the loan is less than seventeen thousand and a month's interest at ten percent is less than another seventeen hundred galleons. If anything, I OVERPAID," Lucius's voice was once again rising, which he became aware of when the spears reminded him.

Gorpus looked amused. He reached into one of the many drawers in his desk and pulled out a scroll. When unrolled, it was at least ten feet long. His finger ran down the scroll until it came to a certain paragraph. He nodded and his smile grew wider. "Do you recognize this document?" He asked Lucius.

Lucius glanced at it and, seeing the header of it, he nodded. It was the loan agreement between the bank and himself.

"And this is your signature and seal?" Gorpus asked Lucius.

Again, the elder Malfoy looked closely at the bottom of the document that was stretched out on the enormous desk in front of him. Seeing his signature and the seal of his family ring, he again nodded.

Gorpus looked at the three guards in the room. "Bear witness that Mister Malfoy has agreed this document is his loan agreement and has also affirmed he did indeed sign it," The three guards all nodded at the higher ranking goblin. Gorpus looked again at Lucius. "Now, Mister Malfoy, I think you didn't read section forty-eight, subsection A, sub subsection eighteen, which clearly states that the ten percent interest is per WEEK and not annually."

The color of Malfoy's face turned as white as his hair and he quickly bent over the document and looked for the offending entry on the contract. He had to squint to finally make out the extremely small writing. When he finally looked up, he could see the goblin grinning at him and showing a large number of very sharp, very pointy teeth.

"Now, Mister Malfoy, since you missed your first scheduled payment, the entire loan is in default. Per section nine-two of the contract, the entire principal along with ALL interest that would have been paid over the life of the loan is due immediately," Gorpus said. "Since you missed your first payment, we have the right to presume nonpayment throughout the whole year, which puts you at owing us twenty-five million eight hundred thousand galleons. Add in the legal fees and other fees as spelled out in section ninety-seven and we'll call it a round twenty-six million galleons that you owe. That is all due immediately."

"But… but..." sputtered Lucius. He knew he was down to only one hundred thousand galleons in his vault. But he also knew he had over forty million galleons' worth of dark magical items in his vault. He had moved them there from Malfoy Manor when the blood traitor Weasley had started his raids. He had spent most of his fortune in collecting the items, and knew in a future time he could sell them for a lot more than they were presently worth. Lucius looked at the smile on Gorpus' face. "I'll need to sell a few things from my vault before I can repay the loan."

"Your vault was seized this morning to prevent you from withdrawing additional funds while you owed us money," Gorpus replied. "The hundred thousand galleons, of course, were not enough to cover the loan," His smiled deepened even more as he continued, "as for the other items in your vault, we determined since they were of dark magic, they had no value and they were all immediately destroyed per our agreement with the Ministry of Magic."

Lucius' skin tone whitened even more. He knew the agreement that the goblin was referring too. "All confiscated dark magical items were to be destroyed by the confiscating party with no reimbursement required." He, himself, had bribed Fudge into getting it passed to help drive up the value of the dark magical items he had purchased. Of course, Lucius Malfoy never expected to have anything confiscated. He tried to swallow once, and then twice. His mouth was extremely dry as he looked at the goblin in front of him. He could feel the knob of his wand in his cane and wanted nothing more than to hex the smile off of the goblin's face, but the hard points of the steel tipped spears were still touching his back. "It will take some time to raise that kind of money to reimburse the bank," Lucius finally said. He was thinking about the only thing he could do is sell Malfoy Manor. At the last tax appraisal it was worth thirty million galleons.

"Time?" Gorpus asked. Then he nodded down at the contract. "Where in this contract does it say you would have time to fulfill a loan in default? No, we will take what we can now and provide you with a single chance to contact an outside party to facilitate additional payments." He nodded at the third guard who was not currently holding Lucius at spear point. That goblin grabbed Malfoy's cane and handed it to Gorpus.

"Nice ebony cane, silver inlaid," Gorpus said while examining the cane carefully. He pulled on the knob at the end and Lucius' wand appeared. "We'll give you credit of one hundred galleons for the cane and another ten for the wand." Gorpus examined the wand carefully before continuing. "Unfortunately, per our agreement with the Ministry, we goblins are not allowed to own wands." He took the wand in two hands and, while looking Lucius in the eyes, he made a quick movement and snapped the wand into two pieces. He nodded again at the third security goblin. The goblin pulled the cloak from the shoulders of Lucius and handed it over to Gorpus. "Very elegant, but used. We'll credit you ten galleons for it."

"But that cloak cost two hundred galleons!" Lucius cried out.

"The used clothes market is so poor right now," Gorpus said as he continued to smile. "Ten is the best I can do."

And so it continued until Lucius Malfoy was standing naked in Gorpus' office. "Now," said the goblin, "you can make that one contact to an outside agent."

"I'd like to call my wife please."

"Certainly," Gorpus said. "We don't have a public floo here in Gringotts, so my security guards will escort you to the Leaky Cauldron so you can make your call."

"What about clothes?"

"What about them?" Gorpus asked.

"I can't go out without any clothes," Lucius snarled.

"Oh, well if you don't want to make that call, that's fine," Gorpus replied. "I'll have the guards escort you to the nearest holding cell until your trial for fraud and theft is arranged."

"Fraud? Theft?" Lucius cried out. "I haven't done either of those things."

"You entered into a contract without the means to repay it," Gorpus said. "We at Gringotts consider that fraud and theft."

"Can't you use my home as collateral?" Lucius asked desperately. He just needed a little time and he was sure he could arrange some kind of payment. "I'll sign anything that will give me time to repay this loan."

"We can't do that," Gorpus said. "We looked carefully at the option to seize your Manor this morning at the same time we were securing your vault, but we discovered the home is entirely in your wife's name. Normally, you would have control over any property in her name, but it seems you specifically detailed it in the ownership paperwork that you declined those rights."

Lucius tried to swallow again. He had put his ancestral home in Narcissa's name to save on his taxes. It had been another law he had bribed Fudge into passing.

"Your wife will have to come down here and sign over the manor herself and, after we have judged the value of it to be sufficient to cover your debt, we shall let you leave," Gorpus replied and looked expectantly at Lucius.

"Well, can you contact my wife and ask her to come down here?" Lucius asked.

"No. That would be up to you," the goblin said. "We are only willing to consider collateral from a third party for your debt. We are not required to assist you in actually obtaining it, nor do we wish to offer assistance to a thief."

"So how do I contact her?" Lucius asked desperately.

"As I said earlier, you can be escorted to the Leaky Cauldron."

Malfoy thought about walking nude through Diagon Alley and shuddered at the humiliation. "What about an owl? Can you provide me with the use of an owl?"

"We do offer our customers that service, but..."

"Fine, get me an owl," Lucius said quickly.

"There is a service fee of five galleons for the use of one of our owls," Gorpus replied.

"Add it to what I owe then."

"I'm sorry but we can't do that. That amount is in default and we cannot extend any more credit to you," Gorpus replied calmly, his smile still residing on his face.

Thirty minutes later, Lucius Malfoy was walking up Diagon Alley toward the Leaky Cauldron wearing nothing but his birthday suit and a grimace. He was surrounded by his three goblin guards who were giving plenty of room for people to view the blond haired, pompous wizard who was walking with two hands covering his privates, though he only needed one to do so. As they passed the offices of the Daily Prophet, the sound of flashbulbs popping could be heard. His entry into the Leaky Cauldron stopped all conversations immediately as they stared at him. Lucius walked over to the fireplace, grabbed some powder and threw it in the fire. Before he could say anything, he felt three sets of goblin hands grab his legs and arms to prevent him from jumping into the fire and escaping. "Malfoy Manor," he said as he stuck his head into the green flames.

"Narcissa?"

"Lucius?" Narcissa replied. "Where are you and why don't you have clothes on? Have you been drinking again so early?"

"I'm at the Leaky Cauldron, but no I have not been drinking. Please, I need you to listen. I ran into a little financial trouble with the goblins. I need you to get the paperwork for the Manor and bring it to Gringotts. I need you to put it up for collateral on repaying their loan."

"Why can't you do it, dear?"

"I put it entirely in your name, Narcissa," Lucius explained. He had never told her he was doing it, since it was purely for tax purposes and she never wanted anything to do with the taxes.

"Oh, well why do we need to put it up for collateral? We should have plenty of money in the vault to pay off the loan. After all, it was only two hundred thousand, wasn't it?" Narcissa asked. "Though I never did understand why you even took out the loan to start with."

"We... uh... I used most of our money to make uh... some… ah... purchases," Lucius explained nervously.

"How much did you spend, Lucius?" Narcissa snarled at her husband.

"Well… uh… thirty-five million galleons."

"WHAT!" Narcissa's voice echoed throughout the Leaky Cauldron. "That should still leave us a couple of million, so what's the problem?"

"I... well... I spent that, too," Lucius said.

"How much do we have left then?"

"We had a hundred thousand galleons and all the stuff I bought which I could have sold for a profit."

"Well sell it!" Narcissa replied getting very testy. No woman was ever ready or willing to give up her home. Especially for her husband's idiocy.

"I… I can't. It's gone," Lucius replied.

"It's gone?"

"The goblins confiscated our vault this morning and uh… ah… destroyed the things I bought."

"We can sue them, then!"

"No, uh… they did it legally."

"LUCIUS MALFOY!" Narcissa screamed. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?"

"We'll talk about it later, Cissy. Right now I need you to come down and sign the paperwork on the manor! The goblins are going to arrest me if you don't. They plan on charging me with both fraud and theft."

"How much do you owe the goblins, Lucius?" Narcissa asked.

Everyone in the Leaky Cauldron was listening intently to every word being said in the fireplace. "We… uh… I owe them," Lucius's voice dropped to a whisper, "twenty-six million galleons."

"TWENTY-SIX MILLION!" Narcissa screamed. "How did a two hundred thousand loan go to TWENTY-SIX MILLION?"

"There was some confusion on the interest amount," Lucius replied.

"Then our solicitor should be held responsible for not catching it, not you!"

"I… I… didn't take it to a solicitor," Lucius admitted.

"YOU SIGNED A GOBLIN CONTRACT WITHOUT LEGAL HELP?" Narcissa screamed again. "HOW STUPID ARE YOU?"

The people who were in the Leaky Cauldron listening to the conversation all started laughing. Everyone knew that to enter a contract with the goblins without having it reviewed by your own counsel was financial suicide.

"Time's up," one of the security guards said to Lucius as he pulled him from the fireplace.

As Lucius Malfoy was being marched back to the bank, his wife was sitting in her living room contemplating what she should do. It had come as a surprise to her that the home was entirely in her name. 'Of course it's something Lucius would do without telling me,' she thought. She strolled down the hallway to the music room. It was a room Lucius would never enter unless his life or a galleon was in danger. She took out her wand and tapped the third panel on the right and it slid open, revealing Narcissa's private storage area. Magically expanded to a very large area, and currently holding her private funds. She had been squirreling away galleons here and there ever since the two of them were married. 'Six million the last time I counted,' she again thought to herself. 'It's not enough to pay the goblins, so I guess we will have to sell the manor.'

She thought of the last fifteen years she had been married to the man and wondered to herself if she wanted another hundred years with him. She finally made up her mind and, with a sweep of her wand, the galleons started piling into her bottomless and weightless bag. When the galleons were all secured, she looked for and found the paperwork on the manor and made her way to her private solicitor.

"What can I do for you today?" Solicitor Goodwin asked Narcissa.

"Take a look at these papers." And Narcissa passed over the documents on the manor. "Is the manor truly in my name alone?"

The solicitor spent several minutes reviewing the parchments. He then called in a junior solicitor and had him run over to the Ministry for a quick review of the records. "Now while we are waiting for him to return, is there anything else I can do for you?"

"Can you see what Lucius' current financial state is?"

"Certainly." The solicitor sent another junior solicitor scurrying off to Gringotts. "Now anything else?"

"I'll let you know when I have those two questions answered."

It was only a half hour before both men had returned and given the information to solicitor Goodwin. "Malfoy Manor is entirely in your name. Interestingly enough, the goblins made a similar inquiry this morning," Goodwin looked at the other set of papers. "And Lucius is currently knutless with a claim of a little less than twenty-six million galleons against him at Gringotts." The solicitor looked up at Mrs. Malfoy. "I'm sorry Narcissa, but with this information, unless you can pay me now, I can do no further business with you."

Narcissa reached into her bag and withdrew a hundred galleons and placed them on his desk. "Will this cover what you need?"

"It most certainly does. Now what else can we do for you this morning?"

"I would like to sell Malfoy Manor as quickly as possible and I would like to file for a divorce. I will relinquish all claims to our son if the divorce can be pushed through as quickly as possible."

"Well, normally it would take time and your husband would need to agree with the divorce, but if there were an appropriate…" He didn't finish the statement before Narcissa pushed another two thousand galleons across the desk. "We can have you divorced within two days."

"Excellent Solicitor Goodwin."

In less than a week, Narcissa Black was lying on a beach in the south of France, drinking cocktails and looking out over the beautiful blue Mediterranean. Even at age thirty-nine, practically still a schoolgirl by magical standards, she was still an extremely attractive woman, especially now that the look of something bad smelling under her nose had disappeared. It wasn't long before she was being hit upon by several strapping younger men. As she later was strolling back to her hotel room with one of those young men, she had a quick thought. 'I wonder what happened to Lucius?' The thought quickly passed as the young man's hand found her rear and gave it a little squeeze.

When Lucius had been returned to Gorpus' office to await the arrival of Narcissa, the minutes had turned to hours until finally Gorpus spoke. "Where is your wife, Mister Malfoy?"

"I… I don't know."

"I have too much other work to be doing," Gorpus replied as he nodded at one of the guards. "Take Mister Malfoy down to a holding cell."

"What? I'm sure she's just having trouble finding the paperwork. She'll be here any minute!" cried Lucius.

"When she arrives, I'll send for you, Mister Malfoy."

Lucius tried to swallow again and, realizing how thirsty he was, he made a request. "Can… Can I get a drink of water and maybe something to eat?"

"Water is two knuts a cup and food is one sickle. Since you have neither, I'm afraid I can't help you."

"But you're holding me prisoner. You're responsible for my well-being."

"We're only responsible once you're formally in our care, Mister Malfoy." Gorpus pulled out some parchment and a quill and quickly wrote several sentences. Looking back at Lucius he said, "This is a full confession admitting your guilt to thievery and fraud. Once you sign it, we can sentence you to your punishment and then you'll be in our care. As of now, you're only being detained while waiting for the arrival of your agent." He handed the parchment and quill over to Lucius who looked at it. "I'll never sign this. I'm not guilty of anything."

"Your choice, Mister Malfoy. Now if you'll excuse me," he nodded at the guards who dragged the blond haired wizard away.

Once Lucius was tossed into a holding cell, he sat quietly waiting for his wife to appear. His thirst only got worse and worse as the day continued. There was no bathroom in the cell, only an old chamberpot. He relieved himself some time that afternoon, and again before he drifted off to sleep as he wondered why his wife hadn't shown up yet. By the next day, the thirst was so bad he started drinking out of the chamberpot instead of putting more liquids in it. Still, he thirsted and still, no wife showed up to save him. By the next day, Gorpus made a stop by the cell to find Lucius almost mad with thirst.

"You can sign the confession, Mister Malfoy, and we will provide you water," he said. "Oh and your agent has made contact via a solicitor," he handed a note to Lucius. "It seems she has filed for divorce and is in the process of selling your manor. Once it is sold, of course, it cannot be used for collateral."

"I'm sure she's selling it to get the money to have me freed," Lucius said around a swollen tongue.

"You can hope so," Gorpus announced. "But that does not explain the divorce, does it?"

Lucius looked down at the note that Gorpus had given him. "Divorce?" He read the note from a solicitor Goodwin explaining that Narcissa was filing for a divorce, giving up all rights to any value in the marriage along with rights to their son. The divorce was being streamlined and should be completed some time today.

"Looks like that divorce will happen very soon," Gorpus explained. He turned to leave before turning back. "Good luck and I'll check back on you in a few hours."

Lucius' confused mind thought over his situation. He had no home, no wife, a gay son, and was being held by goblins. His wand had been snapped and he didn't have a stitch of clothing. 'If I sign the confession, they'll sentence me to maybe four, five years and then when I get out, I can have a new wife and still have my heir,' he thought. When Gorpus arrived later that day, Lucius handed him the signed confession. "Water... please," he pleaded.

"Of course," Gorpus said and motioned for a couple of the guards to bring water and food. "Please deliver Mister Malfoy to my office for his sentencing when he is fed and watered."

Twenty minutes later, Lucius Malfoy was back in Gorpus' office, dressed in an outfit that made house- elf clothing look fashionable.

"Now for your sentence, Mister Malfoy. It's very simple. We want our money. You will be sent to our branch office in Greenland where you will be digging new vaults by hand," Gorpus said. "You owe us twenty-six million galleons. We will credit you one million galleons for every ten years of service provided. That means you will spend the next two hundred and sixty years in our care. Good day, Mister Malfoy, and have a wonderful life. Oh, I should warn you, if you decide to try to take your own life, any and all medical expenses needed to restore you to health will be added to the amount you owe, thus extending your stay in the caves. When you become too old to work efficiently, we have several expensive potions which will be administered to bring you back to a more youthful state of being, but for every two years we have to increase your lifespan, we will add one year to your sentence."

It was only after Lucius Malfoy was portkeyed away to Greenland that the realization of his sentence hit him. He sat down and cried. The goblins docked him a day's pay which only added to his length of sentence.

Two hundred and ninety years later, Lucius Malfoy was given an early release. His frequent injuries due to broken fingers (when goblins say digging by hand, they mean digging by hand) and age rejuvenation potions had brought his sentence up to four hundred and thirty years, but the goblins were finally just tired of him. As the frail ancient wizard stepped out of the branch office, the sunlight he hadn't seen in all of the years he had been sentenced instantly blinded him. The goblins, realizing the blinded elderly human wizard would only be a nuisance outside of their bank, handed him a portkey which instantly transported him to the Greenland Ice Sheet. As Lucius stopped spinning and the cold started to creep into his elderly bones, he heard a sound other than the whistle of the frigid winds.

"GRRRRR!"

The polar bear had an enjoyable snack after spending several minutes playing with his food.

xXxXxXx

Over the next several days, various articles ran in the Daily Prophet. The day after Lucius signed his confession and was sent to Greenland, the front page showed a bare arsed Lucius Malfoy being escorted to the Leaky Cauldron. The headline read:

Lucius Malfoy Guilty of Fraud and Theft!

The goblins of Gringotts convicted Lucius Malfoy of fraud and theft yesterday. His signed confession was formally submitted to the Ministry of Magic, along with the declaration that the goblins were fully within their rights to sentence the former Hogwarts Board of Governors member. We at the Daily Prophet have discovered that Lucius Malfoy will be released once he has earned enough money to repay the loan in its entirety. We were not able to determine how long that was expected to be. Lucius Malfoy was a pillar of the wizarding community and the Daily Prophet wishes him a quick release from his imprisonment.

xXxXxXx

Ragnok, Chief Goblin in charge of Gringotts, slammed down the Daily Prophet after reading the article. 'The Daily Prophet makes it look like we didn't treat Mister Malfoy fairly! Hmm...' He thought. "Griphook!" he yelled.

"Yes sir?" The bank teller responded as he rushed into Ragnok's office.

"I do believe the Editor of the Daily Prophet has been asking for a loan recently, hasn't he?"

"Yes sir, but we keep turning him down due to his inability to repay the loan."

"Excellent. If he asks again, please insure the loan is approved. No collateral needed, and make sure section forty-eight, subsection A, sub subsection eighteen is appropriately filled in," Ragnok said with a smile to his young employee.

"Yes sir. I will tend to it myself," Griphook replied and left the office.

xXxXxXx

"CRUCIO… CRUCIO… CRUCIO!" Voldemort screamed time after time. The subject of curse screamed much louder than his master as each of the pain inducing unforgivable curses hit him. Voldemort was currently sitting in his playpen… er... Psychopathic Entity Lair. Normally, Voldemort would be concerned that such prolonged torture by the cruciatus curse might cause long term brain damage, but he reasoned that since Wormtail didn't seem to possess a brain, the chances of it happening were almost negligible.

Pettigrew was currently being subjected to the extended torture because he had startled Nagini, causing the snake to regurgitate the rabbit it had killed and eaten shortly beforehand. What made it extremely bad was the fact Nagini was sitting in Voldemort's lap being petted at the time the regurgitation happened. Dead rabbit bones and partially digested skin and other stuff had poured all over the self-proclaimed most evil villain to ever walk the earth. This had, in turn, caused said evilest villain to promptly piss in his diaper… er… Evil Villain Waste Capture Device, which pissed off the most evil villain.

When Voldemort finally grew tired of watching Wormtail lurching around on the floor (later magical researchers in muggle customs came to believe the birth of Street Dancing in major cities occurred when someone witnessed a wizard being tortured by use of the cruciatus curse and thought it looked like fun,) he turned his attention to the Daily Prophet that Wormtail had acquired. It was the Daily Prophet striking the snake that had started the early snake startling incident. Fortunately for Wormtail, the paper itself was not spoiled by the regurgitation. As the evil wizard looked at the front page of the newspaper, he saw one of his top Death Eaters walking naked down Diagon Alley, he only had one thought. 'Good help is so hard to find. How in the bloody hell can I take over the world with incompetent followers?' Voldemort pondered the problems he faced. 'But then again, most of my current followers were taught at a Dumbledore-led Hogwarts. What else should I expect?'

xXxXxXx

The last couple of weeks could have been much worse, Draco Malfoy came to realize. He still might be friendless, but at least he wasn't under the death sentence… er... married to that toad woman. As he ate his breakfast, the owls started delivering the morning mail. Draco picked up his copy of the Daily Prophet and opened it. His mouth dropped open as stared at the picture of his father on the front page in horror. He quickly dashed to his dorm where he wrote a letter to his mother asking for an explanation and sent his eagle owl off with it.

The next morning, his eagle owl returned with his letter unopened. Magical Mail Delivery had stamped the envelope, "NO SUCH PERSON AS NARCISSA MALFOY EXISTS IN THE MAGICAL WORLD."

The answer to his confusion came when the Daily Prophet arrived shortly afterwards. The front page, again, had the picture of Lucius as he walked starkers up Diagon Alley, but beside his picture was one of Narcissa putting suntan lotion on her scantily clad body as she sat on a beach chair. The picture showed her smiling and laughing as she was obviously enjoying herself.

Malfoys Divorce

In a surprise announcement, Solicitor Goodwin of Goodwin, Badwin and Callevens announced that Narcissa Malfoy has filed a quick divorce from her husband of fifteen years, Lucius Malfoy. As the Malfoys currently have no shared assets, the divorce was handled in a record amount of time. Narcissa has taken her maiden name of Black and, as you can see, is currently dealing with her separation grief on a beach in southern France.

Since the divorce preceded the conviction of Lucius Malfoy, the status of their son, Draco, is unknown. Mrs. Malfoy, or now Ms. Black, declined all rights to her young son and has left the country. Now with Mr. Malfoy having been sentenced by the goblins, this reporter was unable to determine exactly who would have custody of their son. If no legal guardian can be found, he will become a ward of the Ministry. As a side note to this story, this reporter has discovered that Ms. Black sold Malfoy Manor to an unnamed bidder. According to rumors, the price was much lower than expected. It is rumored that Ms. Black was more interested in selling it quickly rather than obtaining the best price.

Whispers from all around the Great Hall could be heard. As Draco looked around, everyone seemed to be looking at him. He looked back down at the pictures of his parents and thought, 'What happened?'

xXxXxXx

Late in the afternoon of the same day, a Gringotts owl delivered a package to an overly large black dog hiding with a hippogriff in a cave outside of Hogsmeade. Once the owl had departed, the dog quickly morphed into a man. He ripped open the package and found a letter, along with a few keys.

Mr. Black,

Your bid of fifteen million galleons for Malfoy Manor was successful. Per your instructions, a team of goblins have been dispatched to modify the wards to accept you. The deed to the property will be held in your vault and not filed with the Ministry until such time as the Ministry sees fit in providing you with a trial.

Gricorc

Black Account Manager

Sirius Black's laughter could be heard almost all the way to Hogsmeade. He turned to Buckbeak. "Come on Bucky! We have a nice home to go to. What do you think, Malfoy Manor should be a great wedding gift to Harry and Hermione when they finally get married, don't you think? It will be the ultimate prank on old Lucius!"