Ero-Sennin - 1

Chapter Soundtrack: "Bluebird Story" by DJ Okawari feat Jumelles

Hazy steam drifted upwards from the hot springs.

It was a relaxing afternoon until a woman with dark hair turned to her friend after hearing a peculiar noise from outside.

"You didn't hear that? It sounded like someone talking or…giggling... am I going crazy?"

Her friend nodded, "Yeah, I'm pretty sure I heard something to that effect."

Both girls peeked over the fence, but their eyes met nothing but the surrounding forest. A loon called out an eerie cry as they suspiciously scanned the area.

The dark haired woman shook her head and settled back into the water.

"Maybe we're just imagining things..."

Her friend nodded again and did the same.

Little did they know that they were in fact the subject of one ninja's undivided attention.

Stooped in the high branches of a sycamore tree was none other the Legendary Sage Jiraiya, renowned author of the Icha Icha Paradise series. He scribbled notes down furiously while watching the girls bathe, it was after all…

Very important research.

"Heh, heh, this is probably the best yet..." He muttered excitedly to himself.

He had recently returned to the Fire Country and dropped by the Leaf Village; however his research there had been nothing short of a disaster when a certain green-spandex clad jounnin caught him near a women's changing room, and accused him of disrupting the girls' "Springtime of Youth!"

"Feh...weirdo..." Jiraiya frowned as he recalled.

What did he know anyway? Why, Jiraiya was quite certain he was overflowing with youthfulness, and was by no means disturbing anyone's "Springtime".

The small town called Kuro had given him the perfect opportunity to seek new inspiration for his story. Boy did he ever get it. In the midst of his work, he abruptly felt a fierce wind catch him from behind.

Reluctantly, Jiraiya tore his skillful eyes away from the girls and looked behind him. Approaching at an alarming speed was what appeared to be a large whirlwind of sand and debris. The wind was heading straight his way.

"What the-?"

He had no time to evade it, and was hurled from his hiding place with tremendous force and sent hurtling through the air until he crash-landed in the middle of the hot springs on his head. Tree branches and stones rained down beside him.

"...ow."

As if the encounter had never happened, the gale continued on, leaving Jiraiya bruised and soaked with his notes soggy and unreadable.

"Damn gust's gotta screw up my brilliant notes and-!"

"Eh-hem!"

His attention was redirected by the sound of someone clearing their throat noticeably loud from behind him. He jumped to his feet and faced the throng of savagely angry and nude women beginning to surround him.

"Oh, hello there ladies! You're all looking lovely today."

The dark haired woman who thought she was hallucinating before smirked at their discovery.

He received a merciless beating at that point in time, and because the women were both beautiful and not trained in combat he had no choice but to take it without retaliation. The spandex-wearing jounin from Leaf seemed like a mere greeting card after that.

"...WHOA..."

Haku wasn't certain what had just happened. Out of nowhere, a swirling mass of sand blew into Kuro and dissipated to reveal a small red haired boy.

It was enough to throw Naruto for a loop.

"Are you alright?" The blonde was shouting even though the boy who had appeared was currently unconscious.

Haku sighed to himself upon seeing his friend's reaction, 'He is very excitable…'

He and Naruto went to the boy's side to inspect him.

He was deathly pale and covered in perspiration. His face was drawn up in a look of total despair. Naruto was quiet for a long moment before asking, "Is he dead?"

Haku frowned to himself. Was he dead? He of all people should be able to recognize such a state. He placed his hand carefully over the nameless boy's parted mouth.

He drew a weak breath.

"No he's breathing, Naruto!" He reported.

The blonde boy had a look of worry etched onto his face. He could not explain why he was so concerned for the well-being of a person he didn't even know.

Naruto lowered his voice, "What do you think happened to him?"

Haku shook his head, "I don't know."

"What in the world is this about?" Hiroshi wondered out loud as he squatted down beside the two children in his charge, "This poor child just tumbled out of cloud of sand! That's not something you see every day."

"Hiroshi-san, is he hurt? I can't tell why he's in so much pain." Haku observed as the boy twitched and jumped without any clear reason.

Hiroshi shook his head, "It's hard to tell, Haku, he could be very sick. Maybe it was all that sand-?"

Naruto folded his arms and squinted his eyes, "Nah, I don't think so. It kinda looked like that sand was keeping him safe."

Hiroshi and Haku both looked at Naruto strangely. He certainly did have an interesting perspective, although a huge cloud of sand didn't at first look...safe.

"We have to help him, Hiroshi-san." Haku resolved and Naruto nodded in fierce agreement.

Hiroshi looked immensely overwhelmed, "I don't know…I already have you two to look after, and this little one seems to be in very bad shape. I'm not sure where to start..."

Haku looked at him pleadingly, "But we have to do something!"

"Please, Hiroshi-san?" Even Naruto called to him with familiarity. He already had taken in two children, what was one more?

Hiroshi nodded to them, "Alright, Haku, go fetch some water for this poor child. Naruto, there should be a small bedroll by the cart. Can you spread it out for him?"

Both answered in unison, "Yes, Hiroshi-san!"

They both dashed back to Hiroshi's cart to go about their appointed tasks. Hiroshi bent down and scooped up the small boy, wondering what had happened to him

He laid the boy out on the futon Naruto had quickly prepared, and Haku returned hastily with a bowl of water. Hiroshi helped the boy into a sitting position.

"Okay Haku, now just tip some of that water into his mouth." He instructed.

Meticulously, Haku let the unconscious boy take a small sip of water, and he involuntarily leaned up for more. Hiroshi noticed this behavior and concluded that the boy must have been without food or water for a long while.

"Is he gonna be alright?" Naruto was leaning against Haku's shoulder to get a better look at the red haired boy.

Haku was nearly as antsy as Naruto was.

Hiroshi sighed, "I think he'll be alright. We'll have to keep watch to see when he wakes up. Maybe then he can tell us what happened to him."

"Right." Naruto put on a serious face and crept up onto the cart beside Haku. Hiroshi sat down as well with another deep sigh. Good grief.

And as if their day hadn't been long enough, Hiroshi watched with detached concern as a white haired man with red markings under his eyes lumbered towards them in a seemingly foul mood.

He walked with a limp and a scowl was plastered on his face as approached. The cart's occupants looked at him soundlessly until he stopped in front of them. A twig was stuck in his hair.

Just as Jiraiya was about to begin ranting to the odd troop about what mayhem he had went through he felt as if he had been warped back to Konoha.

Bright blonde hair, ocean-blue eyes, and that face...

It was the spitting image of his former student!

Jiraiya blinked his eyes in disbelief. He must be losing his damn mind. He was well aware that his protégée had a son years ago who resided in the Leaf Village and was under the care of the Third Hokage.

And he knew that the child had been named Naruto.

There was no way he could have snuck away without someone taking notice. This was an important kid!

He took a moment to regard the blonde child, trying to verify if it was indeed the one he had in mind. The small boy just gave him a questioning look and seemed ready to shout a snappy remark.

The resemblance was just plain freaky, 'This is him alright…but how the hell did he get here? That is negligence if I ever saw it!'

It quickly occurred to the sage that he ought to return to boy to the Leaf Village as soon as possible. If he didn't he could be held responsible if the Kyuubi fell into the wrong hands.

After a few moments of ordering his thoughts Jiraiya remembered why he was so infuriated.

"Right...have any of you seen a tornado pass by here by any chance?" Jiraiya asked, pulling debris out of his long, white locks.

Naruto immediately identified the man before him as a complete weirdo.

Haku gestured to the unconscious boy as an answer and Jiraiya gave the child a quick glance.

Okay, so the kid was outlandish…but something on the boy's arm immediately drew his attention. A faintly visible, calligraphic arrangement was glowing on the boy's upper arm.