Bitter End

February 6 3:12 PM Dogenzaka Street, Shibuya District

"Who are they? Are you recruiting them or you're doing one of your shady dealings again?" Sakusa asked while lighting up his cigarette.

"Them?" Kuroo smirked before wrapping around his arm around Sugawara's waist. "We're friends." He then look at Sugawara to meet his eyes and asked, "Right?"

Sugawara breathed deeply, his lower lip trembled, and tears filled his hazel brown eyes as he stares at Atsumu. "Yes."

Atsumu was taken aback upon hearing Sugawara's answer that sent shivers down his spine. The atmosphere around them was tense. He knew something was wrong that time. Iwaizumi was behind Tsukishima while Oikawa and Daichi were on the other side of them, holding a gun on their hand.

"Hmm.. so it's a shady dealing again, huh?" Sakusa assumed as he notice Sugawara's hands that kept on shaking.

Kuroo chuckled before releasing his arm wrapping around Sugawara's waist. "Why would you think about something like that, Kiyoomi? They really are my friends."

He walked towards Daichi and grabbed a Heckler & Koch P30 gun from the black bag, forcibly giving it to Sugawara. "See? We really are friends."

"I don't really care what you are up to but..." He stubbed out his cigarette and looked over to Daichi, saying, "Don't mingle with him too much, Sawamura. You're the new leader of the Kita family so my father expects good results from your side."

"W-what...?" Atsumu blurted out without thinking. "Shit. This is bad. I shouldn't have butted in." He thought as sweat trickled down his face.

Sakusa turned his head towards Atsumu. He gazed intently into his eyes as if looking through his soul. "'What?' you asked?"

"I... kno---" He was cut off when he saw from the corner of his eyes that Sugawara was shaking his head.

"You what?" Sakusa asked who's starting to be suspicious of him.

"I... was just... wondering who will replace Kita since... you know..." Atsumu doesn't want to continue what he was about to say. He doesn't want to be rude to Sakusa, knowing Kita has been a good friend to him.

"Is that so?" He gently stroke Atsumu's hair using his fingertips and added, "Don't worry about it. Sawamura won't betray me like what Kita did to me."

He looked back to Kuroo and pointed at the end of the alley. "You're trying to kill them here, aren't you? I saw your men at the end of the alley, waiting for your signal. Clean up the evidences after you do the deed." He said while staring at the CCTV cameras around the alley.

"Oh.. you mean those cameras?" A wicked laugh escaped Kuroo's mouth. "Those are only for display purposes so that someone over here..." He glanced at Sugawara and smirked, ".... will let his guard down."

"I see. Nowadays, people can track down your location using the live footages from the cameras. So did you install signal jammers around too?" Sakusa asked while walking around the CCTV cameras and noticed that the small red lights around the camera aren't on.

"Yeah. Kenma told me about it. He was the one who planned everything."

"Kenma too?!" Atsumu glanced at Sugawara, horrified from what he is hearing right now. He didn't have the slightest idea that many people have been betraying the agency.

"If it's Kenma then this shady dealing of yours will be guaranteed a success, Takahiro."

"I already told you, they really are my friends." Kuroo chuckled while hitting Tsukishima's shoulders non stop that made him clicked his tongue in annoyance.

"I don't care about that as long as you do your work well." Sakusa said before walking away.

Atsumu didn't move an inch from where he is standing. He was just staring back at Sugawara, wanting to grab his hand and escape away from this alley. He knows that if he leaves them right here, Kuroo will definitely cause harm to them.

"Suga---"

"Atsumu." Sakusa called out. "Let's go." He grabbed his arm and pulled him close to him.

He looked over his shoulder and saw Sugawara staring back at him with a small smile on his lips.

"Trust me." Sugawara mouthed before leaving with Kuroo and the others.

Atsumu couldn't feel but worried but with those assuring words from Sugawara, he knows that he still has counterplans prepared.

He gave Sugawara a small nod before going in to Sakusa's car, trusting everything to him.

"Good luck, Sugawara-san."

February 6 5:23 PM Koishikawa District, Bunkyo City, Tokyo

On a 30 minute drive north, Bunkyo City that is located at Tokyo, about 11 km from the heart of Shibuya is where Sakusa and Atsumu were headed. They were silent for a long time on their way back and no one dared to talk about what had happened earlier.

"We're here." Sakusa said as he removes his seatbelt. He walked around the car and opened the door for Atsumu.

"Where are we?" Atsumu asked, staring at a two-story house, simple but seems to be peaceful.

"This is my home."

Atsumu couldn't help but feel surprised but before he could question Sakusa any further, he continued, "Come in."

As soon as they entered the house, it was neat and clean but there were not much appliances and furniture inside.. There was a shoe rack on the entry way but two pairs of slippers were only there.

"Do you want something to drink?" When Atsumu nodded his head, Sakusa leaned to gently kiss him. "Wait for me on my room upstairs." He whispered against Atsumu's lips.

Atsumu knew his face was getting red so he pushed Sakusa away from him, covering his face with his hand.

A small smile formed on Sakusa's lips as he saw how cute his lover is. "He's definitely the tsundere type." He thought.

"Turn on the left corner and you'll see my room at the end of the hallway." He said as he gently caress Atsumu's hair. Atsumu nodded his head, watching as Sakusa went to the kitchen.

Unlike on the ground floor of his house, the second floor was full of books scattered around his workroom.

"Harrison's Principle of Internal Medicine..." He mumbled, reading the title of a book he grabbed from the pile of journals.

"How can he even understand everything that is written in here. It's all in English." Atsumu said while trying to read the difficult terms he saw as soon as he opens the book.

Turning on the left corner, a door was there at the end of the hallway.

"I wonder how his room looks like." He thought before opening the door.

To his surprise, his room was not pretty big. The wall is painted white but the window frames are black. The curtains were dark gray and it looks like they are kept closed like that. There weren't much to be seen inside but the bookshelf on his right caught his attention. All of it, everything in his bookshelf are books for medication.

He roamed his eyes around and ran his fingertips on Sakusa's bed. He took in a deep breath, taking in how the room smelled so strongly of Sakusa.

"It really is his room." He thought.

Atsumu flinched at the sudden sound of a knock from the bedroom door and he saw Sakusa's head peaking out.

"You can use my bed so you can rest."

Sakusa came back holding a tray with a glass of oolong tea and red bean buns. "You need to eat, Atsumu." He said while placing it at the mini table.

"How do you feel right now?" He asked while handing the glass of tea to Atsumu. "Sorry, this is the only drink I can offer to you.

"No, it's totally fine!" Atsumu exclamed and took the glass from Sakusa's hand.

He could feel Sakusa's eyes on him the whole time he drank but neither said a thing until he's done.

For a moment, both of them were silent. Only the sound audible was the wind making a queer sobbing sounds as it swept over the window and the rustling sounds of the leaves falling.

"I'm... sorry." Atsumu mumbled when the silence became uncomfortable for him.

Sakusa sat beside Atsumu on the bed and asked, "Why are you apologizing?"

"Because... I... if I didn't took the drug Futakuchi gave me... that wouldn't happen..."

"Listen, Atsumu." He cupped his face before gently bumping his forehead to his. "It's done, okay? Don't blame yourself from what had happened. It was all my fault. If only I refused Oiwake-san's proposal to tag you along with the drug dealing, this will never happen to you. It was not your fault so please don't blame yourself."

Atsumu held his head down and bit his lower lip as he tries to fight the tears welling up in his eyes. Sakusa's love for him is so pure. He expresses his love for him with full of emotion while here he is, betraying him as an undercover agent.

"You haven't slept properly, have you?" He ran his hand through his hair before leaning forward to give him a kiss on his forehead. "I'm really worried about you." He then wiped off the tears flowing down Atsumu's cheeks.

"I'm... fin----" Atsumu's breath caught when finally he met eyes with Sakusa. Sakusa's eyes were full of so much concern, it was almost overwhelming and he looked so tired. Atsumu had never seen him so tired and pale.

"You're the one who needs sleep." He said, reaching out to touch his face.

"Why did you bring me here instead of going back to the mansion?"

"I want you to move here. It's not safe for you to live on your own any longer." Sakusa spoke before pulling away from his lover.

Atsumu gripped the glass tighter. There was a part of him that just felt so happy that Sakusa wants him to stay by his side but he knew just how much harder this would make everything for him.

He barely had control for just being infront of Sakusa for a couple of minutes - the thought of living together was frightening for him. He might lose his cool and spill everything to him.

Atsumu knew it will be a good advantage for the case but he doesn't know if he could hold it all together. "But my apartment and the flower shop?" He spoke as his excuse.

"I'm not asking you if you want to, Atsumu." His face and voice were as cold as ever and Atsumu couldn't help but feel annoyed with him.

"And what if I refuse?" Atsumu replied, watching closely how Sakusa would react.

Sakusa suddenly chuckled. "Why do you like to push my buttons so much?"

And then things were silent again as the two got lost in their thoughts. It felt like an eternity had passed before Sakusa sighed softly.

"I don't want you to get hurt again." He admitted, looking away and Atsumu looking back towards him with a surprise look on his face.

"I don't want you to be one of the hitmen of the clan and I don't want you to be anywhere near on what I do for living because it's not safe."

"No... What about the... case? A lot of people have sacrificed already. People have died and there's no way I can bring those people's life back. The only thing I could do for them is to move forward and close this case for good." Atsumu felt a panic overcome him but he bit down onto his tongue as he quickly calmed his self.

"You want to lock me up in here?" His voice was barely above a whisper as Sakusa finally looked at him again.

"I want you safe." Sakusa replied, dodging Atsumu's question.

"Sakusa, you can't just lock me up in here and do---" He flinched when he watch how Sakusa frowned deeply. He's starting to get annoyed already.

Atsumu couldn't let Sakusa keep him from his work. His goal for his mission is not just to obliterate the clan but to learn everyone's secrets and weakness, that includes Sakusa Kiyoomi.

He couldn't do that if he's locked up on his house. "I want to work with you, Sakusa. It's not just about myself. I still want to do everything that I can to avenge for my brother's death." Atsumu lied.

Sakusa's eyes narrowed and his jaw clenched tightly as he stared at Atsumu. "I will do that for you."

He stood up and walked towards the window and open the curtains just enought to see outside.

"We'll go back to your apartment and pack your things. As for your flower shop, if you still want to continue, me or my men will accompany you everytime you open for business."

Atsumu felt like screaming. He wanted to. No. He really wanted to live with Sakusa but he knew it was just going to be so much more difficult living with him. He only hoped he could stay in control but part of him thought he might run his mouth and spill every lies and every secrets he have to Sakusa.

"I don't.... want this." He murmured and Sakusa turned around to face him.

"You don't want to live with me?"

Atsumu's tears started welling up on his eyes. "I want to live with you." He thought but nodded his head anyway. His heart hurt. It hurt more than the pain he felt from the comedown of the drugs he took. His heart felt like it was being shred into a million pieces.

He wondered what their life would be like if they were both a normal person but he can't imagine how would it be like. Sakusa wasn't a normal man. It was impossible to think of him as a simple, family man because he's not the Sakusa Kiyoomi he knew. He knows for a fact that Sakusa will never have the opportunity to escape his fate. The fate and path his father paved for him.

Sakusa was silent for a moment, glancing back at his lover. It was the first time he invited someone to live with him and he didn't know that it will hurt so much by being rejected by the person he loves.

"I'm... sorry." Atsumu cried out. "I... don't want to live with you." His lip quivered and a sob threatened to choke off his voice.

"Is it because I'm the leader of the Sakusa clan? Is it because I don't have a proper job and I work illegally?!" Sakusa shouted, his anger ranging through him.

"No... Sakusa please listen to me... it's not like that..." Atsumu pleaded while pulling Sakusa shirt.

"Then why? Why don't you want to be with me?" Sakusa asked, hoping it was not the reason why Atsumu doesn't want to live with him.

Atsumu fell silent, pensive and troubled. He could have just said anything and give him a reason as to why he doesn't want to but the thoughts of lying to him again, haunts him. 

"If that's what you want then I don't care anymore." He said before leaving his room. He knew Atsumu won't be giving an answer to his question.

Sakusa never thought or even considered that this might happen. He thought Atsumu was his and nobody can steal him away from him but Atsumu himself doesn't want to be with him.

He stood close to the door and he could hear the sound of Atsumu crying. He was sobbing painfully.

"I can't take this anymore." Sakusa reached into his pocket to grab his phone to call one of his favorite call girls, only to pause for a moment. He suddenly remembered that he deleted all of his contacts the night after he slept with Atsumu.

Sakusa frowned deeply, glancing over his shoulder at the bedroom where his lover is. It didn't felt right. It didn't felt right to even think about calling a woman over to a hotel for sex just to relieve his stress.

He made his way into the bathroom, stripping of his clothes to take a shower. He felt ridiculous of himself. Atsumu is in his room -he was there and he didn't have to pleasure himself alone. He could have force him to sleep with him but he didn't do it. He could invite anyone for that matter but guilt was eating him up.

The fact that he himself didn't want to have sex with anyone was a new and uncomfortable feeling. If he was his old self, he could have had gone to a hotel right now and call anyone to relieve his stress.

Sakusa gritted his teeth in annoyance, he'd never felt loyal to anyone before and the feeling was suffocating him.

Part of him wanted to go to his club and invite a woman for sex so that he can prove to himself that he didn't care so much, that he hadn't fell deeply in love with Atsumu but he couldn't do it. The thought of touching anyone other than Atsumu no longer seems pleasing to him.

Sakusa closed his eyes, gripping his half hard erection, giving it a firm and slow stroke. He gritted his teeth together, feeling foolish. All he wanted right now is Atsumu.

He silently curse his lover, hating how Atsumu made him feel like this. He could hear Komori's words repeating in his head. He told him he wouldn't lose focus - that there's no way he would lose focus. He worked too hard for this and followed all of his father's order for his mother's safety but he doesn't want to lose Atsumu.

He wanted to leave everything behind and be with Atsumu but his mother will be left alone with his father and he doesn't want that to happen.

If only he was just a normal person with a normal job, maybe things would be different.

He bit back a groan as his thoughts went back to Atsumu, crying in his bedroom. There was something different about him that he didn't find with people he had relationship.

He felt a sense of pride, knowing he's the first man to take Atsumu and he fully intended to not let anyone touch his lover. He didn't want to care so much but he did. He did care for him to the point of sacrificing his self to save Atsumu.

There is no denying it, Sakusa Kiyoomi has fell in love deeply with Miya Atsumu.

He wasn't scared that much but the thought of being in love was terrifying. "So this is how it feels." He thought, reality sinking in.

People had always come and go and he'd never once thought about caring or crawling his way to get the person back but Atsumu was different. He's the first person he felt the urge to lock him up and never let anyone touch or see him.

There was a part of him that felt like something wasn't right but he ignores all of the signs. Sakusa is not a fool but there was a part of him that wants to trust Atsumu. He wants to trust Atsumu and to believe that he's not an undercover agent. His background and profile was checked out properly - everything. But, something, just felt off.

He didn't want to think about it, Sakusa wouldn't allow himself to think about it.

He hated Atsumu for invading his thoughts, for making his chest ache in unfamiliar ways. He didn't want this and it was dangerous, too dangerous to be in love but he was too far gone.

He wanted Atsumu to stay to ensure his safety but if he refuses and force his self to work with him, he doesn't know onto what extent he can protect his lover knowing his father and Oiwake have the control.

He let out a grunt and closed his eyes as he came into his hand, breathing heavily for a while before walking out of the shower and going to his walk in closet to pick his clothes.

He soon went back to his room after changing and saw Atsumu curled up on his bed. He heard him sighing loudly, catching his breath more and more to stop himself from sobbing.

He thought that if both of them haven't met at the gunshop, if he didn't approach him, if he didn't invite him on a duel and if he didn't force him to be one of the hitmen of the clan, will everything be different?

If it wasn't for him, he wouldn't be feeling these things -these horrible things that made him feel like a teenager in love for the first time. "Is it so bad? Is being in love a bad thing?" He wondered. For once, he didn't know the answer to his question.

All he wanted was to not lure in Atsumu on his world. A world where only cruelty, distress, brutality and barbarism exist. Atsumu doesn't belong to this world. He wanted to protect the man he truly loves.

He walked towards the bed and gently caress his lover's head. "Atsumu." He called out.

Atsumu looked over to where Sakusa is and saw a painful smile forming on his lips.

If this is for your own safety, I'd gladly make this decision even if it will hurt me.

"Let's break up."