Am I Really Ugly? Maybe I Should Die

"You are kinda ugly, aren't you?" I say as the short fat man walks into my cave. "I was thinking, maybe you could be the one to kill me, but I don't want to be taken out by someone so ugly." I say while sitting on my ledge.

The little man starts to huff and puff, "You aren't pretty either. I bet your true form is even uglier."

"Ohh. My true form? Like... me with no clothes on? Yeah, that is weird. Maybe it is ugly, but you aren't gonna see it."

"Die!" The man shouts, raising the wooden staff he carries. After a moment, a ball of fire forms at the end of the staff and it darts toward me.

"Ahhhhh. That looks hot! If I am killed by something that hot, it had best be a woman." I yell as I dive to the side.

The fireball hits the wall behind where I was and sends small pieces of stone flying; leaving a crack on the wall.

"I have to live here, you know! Let's not be so violent."

"Monsters don't deserve places to live." Another fireball appears at the end of his staff. The flaming ball flies toward me and I dive out of the way again. Once again, a crack was left in the wall.

"STOP. HITTING. MY. WALLS!"

"Stay still then, you monster." The fat man is red in the face by now. He loads up yet another fireball.

"Do you know how to do anything aside from make fireballs? They are starting to get annoying." The man ignores me and flings the fireball at me.

As the fire ball flies toward me I look at the wall behind me in a moment of indecision. I make my decision after a moment and leap into the fireball.

"You aren't gonna destroy my home!" The fireball explodes on my breastplate, "OW! Hot, hot, hot. That is hot. I feel so sorry for my walls right now."

My breastplate is red hot, so I throw it off as quickly as I can and decide it is time for the offensive. I take my sword and charge the man who is unsurprisingly sending another fireball at me. 'I really need a real shield.' I think as the fireball slams into my chest and catches my shirt on fire.

"You pig! You caught me on fire!" I yell, "It's hot. Don't you have any manners?"

The blast sent me to my butt, but I tore my shirt off and jumped to my feet. Before he could ready another fireball, I closed the remaining distance and swung my sword. He finished a fireball at the moment my sword was about to connect and blasted my sword out of my hand, so with no other option, I tackled him.

We crashed to the ground, and I fell on top of the rolls of fat that were much softer than the plate armor I fell on yesterday. Sadly, he was still conscious, so I pulled out the dagger that I had tucked into my waist band. The handle was hot from the fireballs that I bathed in earlier. It burnt my hand, but I brought it up to the fat man's neck.

"Why don't you get on out of here? My house isn't big enough for the two of us... though I am not sure any house is big enough for you."

The man reaches into a bag that he had secured to his waist and pulls out a red crystal. He closed his eyes and a moment later he disappears, and I fall the rest of the way to the ground.

Now that the immediate danger is gone, my mind focuses on the huge burn that spans my entire chest. I grimace and look around at what the fat man left when he teleported. There was the staff that he dropped when I tackled him and a lot of sweat, though I won't be getting much use from the sweat.

I grit my teeth and pick up the staff. Instinctively I feel that I can push energy into the staff and make something happen. Right now, however, all of my energy is being spent on trying to keep myself from crying, so I'll try that out later. I shuffle back over to my ledge and painfully take a seat. I lean back against the wall and rest my eyes.

"I wonder if the next person will be worthy of killing me?" I ask the cave, "Actually, I think I'll be okay if I just stay alive for a little longer. Life burns, but it is kinda exhilarating."

The cave doesn't hold up its side of the conversation, so I doze off. I must have slept through the night, because when I woke the chest was different than when I went to sleep. There was a sack attached to the chest along with a note.

"Here is some food. You are making great progress. Keep it up."

"Forget you! I just wanted to die," I yell, "But I guess living might not be that bad."

I look in the bag and find food along with some bandages that I use on my chest.

The rest of the day passes uneventfully, and I go to sleep. Today's chest doesn't have a note, but it came with a bit of food. The next few days pass in a similar fashion and my chest starts to heal.

Now I am sitting on my ledge gripping the fat man's staff and staring at the door, waiting for my next visitor to appear. I am about to doze off when a little girl walks in.

"You... are definitely not who I was expecting. Maaaan. I can't expect you to take my blood on your hands, you are too-"

"Ew. You're ugly," The little girl turns and walks out of the room.

"Augh." A noise that I didn't know I was capable of making jerked its way out of my mouth and I crumpled like I had been struck in the stomach.

"Hey! Am I really that ugly? Wait! Come back! I have treasure! Don't you want the treasure chest? Come baaaack!"

She kept on walking without even acknowledging what I was saying.

"You know, cave? Life really is that bad. I don't know what I ever thought could come from living. Maybe I can go find a deadly trap in the maze." I stand up and wander listlessly toward the door. When I make it to the door there is an invisible force field keeping me in.

"Oh come on! What am I? The boss? This is ridiculous. Oh, yeah! I have a sword in here." I pick up my sword, but then look at the chest sitting in the middle of the room.

I walk over to the chest and pat it's lid, "You'll be fine without me. Really, you don't need me. You'll do great without me."

I stare at the chest, "Oh don't look at me that way. This is my choice, not yours. Quit! I can't take it when you look at me like that. Fine. I'll stay with you a little bit longer. I don't want to, though."

I raise my voice, "You hear that, you dragons? I don't want to! I am gonna live a bit longer, but I don't want to. I am only doing it for Chest, not me or you."

"But Chest, you don't think I am ugly, do you?"

"Chest?" I wait for his response.

"Now you are going silent on me? You do think I am ugly, don't you?"

I cross my arms, "Humph. Why don't you leave, just like that little girl did, then? What do you mean 'I would if I had legs'? Waaaaah. You are so mean."

"Hey, dragons. Tomorrow, I want you to bring me a nicer chest, please."