Ambivalence

The king—the man who was once a king—spoke:

"Life... it is something that ends. Life is a pilgrimage that accumulates suffering. However, it is by no means a tale of death and disconnection."

Now, I understand. I recognize the meaning of an end. I acknowledge the value born from suffering. But that doesn't mean I agree. There's no way I could agree.

Is there value in life? Does death have meaning?

But what about reality?

There are lives without value. There are deaths without purpose. There are lives that end without anyone witnessing them. There are living corpses. There was unrequited love. There were hearts that couldn't be saved. Nothing remains. Nothing lingers. It's just sad. It's just lonely. It's quickly forgotten. It can be easily forgotten. There's only pain. There's only lamentation. There's only hardship. There's only fear. There's only despair. There's only resignation. It's lonely. It's powerless. It's a tragedy. It must end.

It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. There's nothing. There's nothing. There's nothing. There's nothing. There's nothing. There's nothing. There's nothing. There's nothing. There's nothing. It's just suffering. It's just suffering. It's just suffering. It's just suffering. It's just suffering. It's just suffering.

There are lives that aren't even sacrifices. There are lives that don't even serve as a foundation. Deaths that are merely consumed still hold some meaning. What kind of story exists for deaths that are processed only as numbers?

Such a reality cannot be accepted.

That man is truly an incompetent king. A merciless king. Reality diverges from those words. There are things that won't be saved. There are things that no one will save. This world is filled with deaths that are nothing but endings. There are lives that can only be filled with accumulating suffering. There are lifetimes that end with nothing but suffering.

That's why such a world must be denied.

I can't accept lives without value. I can't acknowledge deaths without meaning. Every life should begin with celebration. Every death should end with regret.

You are truly detestable, Solomon. Because of your words, we had no choice but to start this plan. The world that is about to begin will surely be filled with the hope you entrusted to 'him.' We will accomplish what you couldn't.

Let us prove that your idle talk was correct.

These abominations that only increase the tragedies in this world, become at least sacrifices for this great feat. That is the final value bestowed upon you. Let us turn your ugliness into nourishment for a beautiful world.

Even your deaths should have meaning, shouldn't they?

***

"So, all of you in the Hero faction are going to fight against the Goddess Rhongomyniad, right? Lint-san."

"Seems like it, Valerie-senpai."

Half-vampire Valerie Tepes, who possesses the Holy Grail, and Lint Selzen, a warrior from the former Church's dark faction chosen as a wielder of the Holy Cross, were having such a conversation while enjoying their tea.

"Fighting a goddess in modern times... It's a bit scary. I'm glad I'm not affiliated with the Hero faction!"

"But I'm worried. I hope everyone remains safe."

Their presence is significant in the plans of the Demon Pillars. That's why they have been excluded from the forces against the goddess rhongomyniad. However, Lint's brother, Freed, is considered part of the fighting force.

"You don't need to worry, Valerie Tepes. We will definitely win."

Cao Cao, the bearer of the Holy Spear, declared. The value of Cao Cao, the two girls, and Cao Cao himself is almost the same. However, due to their "incompleteness," Cao Cao is allowed to participate in this battle. He himself also desires it.

In the past, Cao Cao would have challenged the goddess to become a hero. But now, he is slightly different. His reason for fighting has changed. He has found a reason to win.

"By the way, haven't you seen the Professor around?"

"I haven't seen him either."

"I see. I wanted to hear his opinion now that we know some of the forces associated with the goddess. If you see him, please ask him to come to the usual room."

As Cao Cao was about to leave, Lint asked him a question without preamble.

"I've been thinking for a while now, Cao Cao-sensei. Do you know who the Professor really is?"

Cao Cao was taken aback by the unexpected question, but he quickly regained his composure. He smiled faintly and shrugged his shoulders. Every aspect of his attitude was a silent affirmation.

"Well, well. With that tone, did the Professor himself tell you?"

"No, it was Lord Amon through Brother Freed."

"I see..."

"If things continue like this, won't the Hero faction be completely used up?"

In response to Lint's taunt, Cao Cao remained calm.

"That might be possible. I don't know what intentions he has or what kind of fate he plans to force upon me. I gave up a mundane long life and chose the turbulent life of a hero, but I lacked both the determination and the intellect. If I continue to follow his words, I might meet a miserable end. However, no matter how it may turn out, I am grateful for meeting him."

This is undoubtedly his true feelings. And this is also his true feelings.

"Besides, surpassing the expectations of my mentor is the greatest form of gratitude. From now on, we will defeat the goddess. But that won't be the end, right? I want to do something that someone in the past once did, you know."

As Cao Cao said that, his eyes turned dark red.

"I will definitely save the world—... But let's not get carried away."

The words to Cao Cao were spoken by none other than Cao Cao himself. Valery, Lint, and even Cao Cao himself showed no surprise. There was a slight but definite annoyance in his voice.

"You cannot save the world. We cannot be surpassed by you. You lack both aspirations and beliefs, determination and ideology, madness and desires. You are deficient in what you need. Whether you possess the Holy Spear or you are a descendant of heroes, whether you were nurtured by gods or Buddhas, you cannot become like Fujimaru Ritsuka."

Fujimaru Ritsuka. The Demon Pillars occasionally mention that name. Although there are individual differences, generally, their hatred is directed towards that name. Especially the Demon Pillar that had its cells transplanted into Cao Cao holds the strongest hatred.

"You are special. You are an exception. That's why you cannot surpass that average and ordinary man. I have no reason to hate you. You just need to destroy the goddess, merge completely with our factors, and complete the spear. That's enough for you."

Cao Cao's eyes returned to normal.

"...So, for them, defeating the goddess is something they should be able to do naturally. I guess they want to say that if you are special, you should be able to accomplish this much."

Cao Cao smiled deeply as he tapped his shoulder with the Holy Spear.

"Very well. I will show you the potential of humanity."

***

I—Hyoudou Issei, am repeating the days of being chased by a giant dragon in the Gremory Territory of the Underworld.

It's not that I'm being attacked by a monster; it's training. Training, I tell you. I thought I was going to die countless times, but it's training. It's become like a survival game, completely devoid of meals and sleep, but it's training.

Tannin, the Former Dragon King and Ultimate-class Devil, the "Devil Dragon King." He's my current teacher. He looks exactly like a "dragon." A giant monster talked about in legends and myths. But he's not a ferocious and unintelligible monster. He's a dragon, but a good guy.

I'm training under him because it was arranged by Azazel-sensei. As Club President peerage advisor, Azazel-sensei provided us with a training regimen. Right now, my basic abilities are lacking. That's why I'm strengthening my body through simple yet grueling survival-like training.

I can't defeat Vali as I am now. Azazel-sensei, who has lived since the dawn of the Bible and is known as the strongest White Dragon Emperor throughout history and beyond. Vali Lucifer. He's different from me, who was born and lived as an ordinary person, a culmination of talent. Even the word "genius" is not enough for him.

I heard about that guy from Azazel-sensei, who came to watch our training.

"Huh? So you have no idea where Vali is right now?"

In response to my question, Azazel-sensei nodded.

"Yeah. He's part of the Old Satan Faction, one of the major factions of the Khaos Brigade. Although they are a mysterious terrorist organization, his movements, being a descendant of Lucifer, are noticeable. Even if I don't know the exact details, some rough information should come in... But I can't sense anything. There are rumors that he leads a team with special authority, but it feels odd."

"I see."

"Well, it's him we're talking about. You don't need to worry."

From what I heard, Vali was raised by Azazel-sensei for the most part. I didn't ask for more details. Even though he's a battle maniac, there must be something he values.

"Anyway, focus on your training with Tannin. We don't have much time until the game with Riser Phenex. Your Forbidden Move is essential to defeat the Phenex. "

"Yes! I will definitely make my Forbidden Move and blow away that grilled chicken bastard!"

"That's the spirit."

The game with Riser Phenex, which had been postponed, is approaching. It seems to have caught the attention of the important figures of each faction due to the future of Satan sister being at stake and the timing of the agreement. It was originally a battle that couldn't be lost, but it's become even more embarrassing that I can't afford to make any more mistakes.

If it weren't for this game of breaking off the engagement, I heard from Club President father that I would have ended up fighting Saji, one of Sona Sitri's peerage member. If that had happened, there might have been a possibility of fighting that spoon guy. It would have been alright for soldiers with the same master to clash with each other and express their feelings at least once.

"Oh, speaking of missing persons, Azazel-sensei. Do you know anything about Irina?"

"The Protestant Swordswoman, Shidou Irina. No, I haven't heard anything from Michael either. It seems that there has been no progress."

Shidou Irina. My childhood friend whom I reunited with after moving overseas was a Holy Sword user belonging to the Church. She returned to Kuoh Town after the Excalibur incident caused by Kokabiel. Xenovia was present at the scene where Kokabiel exposed the absence of God, but Irina was not. Irina, who was spared from knowing about the absence of God, returned to the Church Headquarters with the fragments of the shattered Excalibur—or so it should have been.

However, my childhood friend is still missing. It seems that traces were found up until she left Japan and entered Europe, but that was it. The whereabouts of the fragments of the Holy Sword are also unknown. The most plausible possibility is that someone attacked her for the Holy Sword. Whether she was taken away or killed. I hope she's at least alive.

Come to think of it, Zenovia, who learned about the absence of God, also seems to be missing. She was expelled from the Church, with Durandal serving as her severance pay, but her whereabouts are unknown. I remember club president father regretting that he couldn't scout her as a servant.

"Oh, speaking of which, Michael didn't know about me."

To the sudden voice, I became puzzled. In that moment, Azazel-sensei and the old man, Tannin, entered a battle stance. When I looked in the direction of the voice, Shidou Irina appeared from among the trees. Instead of her usual battle attire, she was wearing light armor like the ones worn by Western knights.

The first one to react to the appearance of the girl who was just mentioned in the conversation was not me, Azazel-sensei, or the old man. It was Ddraig, who resides within my Sacred Gear.

"I've been waiting. Have you come as my wielder?"

"...Ddraig?"

I couldn't tell who was the one sounding puzzled by the nonsensical statement. In addition to the true meaning behind it, more and more questions floated in my mind. Why is Irina here? Why didn't Azazel-sensei and the old man notice her approach? Why did the Church member Irina call Michael by his first name? And why—are we surrounded by knights?

Unadorned knights in full-body armor. It's not just because their skin is completely covered that they feel eerie. They lack not only humanity but even the sense of being a living being. However, the only thing emanating from them is an intense killing intent. It's enough to make me feel like my consciousness is about to fade away.

Every time the knights move, the sound of metal rubbing against armor echoes. Even though I want to ignore it, it enters my ears because of the silence around me. It's terribly annoying.

"Issei-kun, can I have your arm, even if it's just the contents?"

Irina took out a sword from her pocket and pointed its tip at me. Of course, that sword was not Excalibur—it was something else.

"Everything is for the Lion King."

***

If you want to read more than 10 chapters ahead of the regular update schedule, you can visit my patreon and subscribe.

Pa treon.com/miraclebringer

Your support will really help me to be more passionate in writing more interesting stories.