Chapter 15

Seven Years ago:

"I like her."

"She hates you."

"She's going to be in my harem."

"She's going to murder you before that."

"For the harem!"

"You can't fall back on saying that whenever you can't think of a legitimate reason to justify your actions. It only works so many times before people won't accept it as an excuse for your poor decision making." Azazel deadpanned as he walked Issei towards the Principal's office where the boy would sign the last of the paperwork needed to register for classes next semester. "That girl is a student here. She has more important things to focus on than kids that ogle and feel her up on first sight."

"You just don't think I can do it because she looks like a challenge and you're used to setting the bar low for yourself." Issei reached the door first, leaving a stuttering governor looking in absolute confusion and disbelief at the back of the kid's head.

"Guh?!"

"Ahahahahaha!" As usual, Ghost played the role of the one man audience, laughing his ass off whenever Issei absolutely tore into anyone with no sense of shame. "It's funny because it's true!"

"No! It's not true! No! You haven't even seen me on my game you ungrateful brat! I have standards!"

"The non-soundproofed walls between hotel rooms says otherwise."

"Erk!"

"Scrub! Total scrub mistake! Scrubbing it up three nights straight! Ya Scrub!"

"At least I'm able to get some! Keep talking like that and I'll make it my goal to make the kid immortal just to make sure your sack discharges dust the next time it fires off!"

"Bitch say that to my eyeball gem gauntlet face thing!"

"Calm down you idiots." Ddraig tried to be the voice of reason. "Azazel has done a lot recently. You can spare to ignore a few of his shortcomings for the time being."

"You too Ddraig?!" Azazel was both agonizing over the loss of his dignity, and absolutely thankful that no one ever seemed to be around whenever Issei tore into him like this.

"Fine. Fine. I can let him off the hook for now. I'd rather talk about Onee-san anyways." Issei waved off the subject with a tired sigh. "I still think she should be in the Harem though. She looks lonely."

"Lonely?" Azazel blinked, trying to figure out what the hell Issei was talking about so suddenly before the kid opened the door and walked in. Almost instantly, Ddraig's and Ghost's presences vanished inside their host, knowing now was not the time for them to participate.

"Ah. Azazel of the Grigori. And I assume you are Issei Hyoudou." An aged man of European decent if the full face of hair was any indication greeted them behind a desk in the office with a kind smile. "Welcome. Welcome. I've been expecting you two."

"Ah. R-Right." The Fallen switched gears instantly, walking forward and reaching out peacefully with a hand. "Alexi Blavatsky. Descendent of the famous Helena Blavatsky. I've heard quite a few things about you. I was quite surprised that someone of your reputation and lineage would aim for a position like this."

"Like this? He's the head director of one of the biggest neutral party educational and magical facilities on the planet." Issei was confused.

"He's referring to the fact that I'm here and not in Grauzauberer, the leading academia in human based magic."

"And a part of the Magician Council." Azazel added pointedly.

"Oh." Issei blinked in understanding and already visually losing interest in the subject.

"Hmhm. I see that our young prospective here may be talented, but still has some growing up to do." The head of the college chuckled, giving Azazel the briefest of scrutinizing looks as if trying to figure out what the man's hidden motive was. "You have gone through all the legal hoops already, but I am obligated to ask you again, Issei, are you certain that you wish to enter my school? You have proven yourself academically, fantastically so, but you are still a child. You should spend your youth enjoying it."

Issei tilted his head curiously at the man, before turning to Azazel. "What is he evasively trying to warn me about?"

Alexi, understandably, coughed nervously.

The Fallen, on the other hand, laughed, having already gotten somewhat used to Issei calling people out on their bullshit. "This school's reputation is well earned Issei, but you were so focused on the academics that you never bothered researching the politics of this place. It is a neutral entity as far as the factions and other pantheons are concerned, but that doesn't mean that games aren't played here. Actually, you could say that it's considered a local sport. Many notable and wealthy families from all regions send their kids here not only to learn, but to get practice dealing with friends and foes alike. If you aren't a name here, odds are you're being used by one."

"Oh." Issei blinked understandingly. "… So what you're saying is that this place is constantly getting bribes from all the pantheons to look the other way whenever their kids screw up… meaning that the research facilities here must be better stocked and diverse than I thought! Well, that or things are destroyed so frequently from infighting that the civil engineers here must make a killing."

Azazel and Alexi shared a look. The kid wasn't wrong, but he completely ignored the point they were trying to get across.

"Issei, I think the bottom line he was getting at was that some of your classmates would try to take advantage of you once they find out who you are. Regardless of the fact that Ophis likes you or not."

"I thought that the people here were supposed to be at least somewhat smart." Issei looked confused.

"Coming from the impulsive brat that constantly rips on a certain Heavenly Dragon and Outer God without shame."

"… Ah." The boy looked to the side, slightly embarrassed for being called out for something so obvious. "So what should I do then? I don't care about any of that stuff. Power. Fame. Money. All of it is superfluous acclamations that matter more for social constructs and self-gratifying measurements that have little to nothing to do with my ultimate aims. I have enough of each already to accomplish what I want, and can easily get more on my own if needed. What should I do to avoid getting dragged into these worthless dick measuring contests? I have more important things to do."

The head of the College had to stifle a choke of surprise and laughter. He could only imagine the expressions that half the student body would have if they ever heard anyone blatantly dismiss their activities and interactions with one another as "worthless dick measuring contests".

He hoped that, should the day ever come, he would be there with a camera at the ready.

Azazel coughed. "Yes, well, that was something that me and some of our acquaintances talked about before coming here. I was actually planning on setting up shop in the area to do some Sacred Gear research for a while since things were calming down, but that's just me being a nearby friend to talk to."

Actually, it wouldn't be far to assume that he was using Issei as bait to see what underground parties might be interested in the current Sekiryuutei. Especially if the kid was smart enough to get into college before hitting puberty.

Issei deadpanned. "I fear for the future cumulative GPA of this place if you're staying in the vicinity long term."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"How many fraternities are you a part of or had a part in founding around the world again?"

"Oi oi. Cut me some slack. My wild rabble rousing days of youth are behind me kid. I prefer researching these days. Not partying."

"Says the guy that's seen more often with hard liquor than not these days."

"I wonder why."

Alexi laughed nervously as the mismatched duo were giving one another the stink eye, glaring with such intensity that lighting was clashing viciously. "Issei, like Azazel was saying, we did speak of this beforehand. I can clearly tell that politics is not exactly your forte, or in your interests, so I proposed a workaround solution for the time being."

"A workaround?" The boy was interested and confused.

"Mmm. Interacting with your fellow students is unavoidable, however I felt that controlling who you spoke to first would curve things to your favor. There are many programs across campuses these days that serve to aid and acclimate new students to college life away from home and their families. Normally it's handled by the student government body or a related club. This campus is no different." The man pressed a button on his desk, prompting his secretary to allow the person in question into his office.

"I hope you got someone with a good head on their shoulders." Azazel sighed. "Issei's a personality, but he's got quite a number of eyes on him that are curious about his growth."

There are many parties that are invested in the boy. I am not the only one keeping an eye on the kid. Azazel's unspoken message about the boy was heard loud and clear by the Headmaster.

"Don't worry. This person is on the freshman student body. He is already aware that he is tasked with guiding a special human student sponsored by the Grigori through the school and will stay to his duties."

"Which is it?" Issei rolled his eyes, already knowing where this was going. "Devil or Angel."

"He's-"

Before the man could get another word out, the doors to the office opened to reveal a tall and handsome blonde teenager with a confident swagger and smirk on his face.

Said smirk dropped almost instantly as the owner took one look at the unremarkable image that was Issei and the very familiar sight of the Leader of the Grigori, and realized that this job was not going to be as easy as he had thought.

"Azazel. Issei. Allow me to introduce you to Riser Phoenix. Third in line to the Phoenix clan of the 72 Demonic Pillars."

"… Can I trade him for a her please?"

Azazel face palmed. This was going as expected faster than planned.

o. o. o.

Current Day:

Three hours had passed, and the second it had been acknowledged, Raynare had collapsed on the ground unable to do anything but breathe and barely keep conscious.

"Haaah." Issei breathed out slowly. He was also covered in dirt and sweat, but despite being human, he appeared to be more or less still ready for action. His breathing was deep, but not labored, and otherwise he looked like he was able to go for another hour or two without too much problem. "Damn. I really must be out of shape if I'm this tired already. This weekend's gonna suck."

"I do hope that does not mean that you are going to give us a similar treatment." Rias tentatively stated from what appeared to be a safe distance away from him, alongside Akeno and a sullen Koneko. The youngest of the three had red eyes, clear proof that she had been crying a good deal recently, but no one dared to point it out for obvious reasons.

Mostly because almost everyone present was more concerned of Issei potentially going after them with dildos for several hours next.

They, along with everyone else in the school facility had served the roles of confused spectators for at least an hour each as Issei chased after Raynare in a blind sprint while they shouted the most bizarre and vicious things at one another. After which the audience, much like during a NASCAR race, realized that they had better and more productive things to do with their lives.

"Kill. Them." Raynare managed to wheeze out between breaths. It was the only thing she could do in her current state.

Issei rolled his eyes, moving his hands, which were still gripping the "trucker dildos", behind his back. "Stop clenching your sphincters already. Unless you three have been doing nothing but eating, sleeping, and doing barely any physical and magical activity for the past two months, you're in the clear."

"Hate. You. Hate you, so much."

"Well, that is a relief. Although, considering your track record that does make me somewhat wary of what other horrifying experiences you might make us undergo in the future." Akeno smiled sweetly.

"Keep talking Yandere. You might actually learn to be subtle at some point." Issei deadpanned.

"Couldn't she have just flown away?" Rias asked in confusion. Issei was still for the most part a human. Raynare could have just used her wings to get out of range.

"She tried." His eyes momentarily flashed with a sadistic satisfaction that he didn't even attempt to conceal. In the back, his victim shivered unconsciously, trying to suppress the horrifying memories.

All the girls present made a mental note to up their personal training regimens to avoid ever finding themselves in Raynare's position.

They were so off put that they almost didn't notice him returning his hands to his sides, the sex toys nowhere to be seen.

"How do you do that?" Koneko blinked, her tired expression not changing at all.

"Do what?"

"You keep on making things appear and vanish behind your back." The Rook pointed out. "Your phone. Those stupid toys. I don't see any light that comes from magic when you do it."

Issei shrugged. If he had been surprised about being called out by his gimmick, he didn't show it. "Pocket dimension."

"That, still doesn't make any sense." Rias frowned in confusion, trying to make sense of what he said. "Even if you did have one, normally you'd still need to use magic to access it. We would have sensed or seen at least something, even from this angle."

"It's a special pocket dimension." He lamely added without any shame.

Rias, knowing a lost cause when she saw one, gave up the investigation. "Really, Issei? Never mind. Leave it be, Koneko. We'll probably find out eventually regardless."

"… Fine." The girl didn't look happy about the dismissal, but she didn't look like she was up for a fight right now either.

"I must say though, I am impressed that you could move so fast for so long." Akeno giggled. "That sort of stamina is quite uncommon, even for Devils. If I was told that a hikikomori did what you just did, I wouldn't have believed it myself."

"You do realize you're making a sexual stamina joke to a guy that can literally write you a statistical report off the top of his head on how long a person can last in bed based on age, gender, and species, right?" Issei asked skeptically.

"Yes. But while we are on the subject, I'm curious, where would you be on said list?" You had to give it to her, Akeno wasn't backing down.

"Akeno!" Rias blushed.

"Top hundred thousandth percentile of human males, but that's mostly because I cheat. Top seven percent of males of all sentient species." Issei didn't miss a beat. There was no shame in him at all. "Ballpark estimate. Angels aren't included because they skew the graphs and there isn't enough data on them."

"Issei!" Rias turned on him, trying very hard not to think about what his supposed stats said about him.

"Oh my. Someone certainly thinks highly of himself." Akeno had no such reservations, before pausing. "Ara? I thought that you don't masturbate?"

"I have my ways." In typical Issei fashion, his ominous answer left everyone with questions that they really didn't want to ask or spend time thinking about.

"I thought Angels were eunuchs." Koneko threw in her two cents, clearly not caring at all about his supposed sexual prowess.

"A common misconception. They have the gear, but can only use it under specific circumstances otherwise they'll Fall." Issei corrected her factually. "It was originally a petty insult Devils and Fallen used on Angels that was somewhat popular around third century BC because like I said, Angels are rarely able to have sex without Falling. But, it eventually somehow got to the humans that didn't know the true nature of the world at the time. A few false assumptions and generations later, and the idea became mainstream. By the time the upper brass in Heaven realized it was a thing, it was too late to change it without putting in far more effort than it was worth, so they just left it alone."

That, and it gave the male Angels some relief that any paintings and sculptures that were made in their images wouldn't have their junks on display for the world to see. Self-conscious virgins.

"I, huh. That is actually pretty interesting." Rias admitted, allowing herself to be distracted. She knew that Angels weren't eunuchs, but the other details were never explained to her in full other than the basic common knowledge that "if an Angel falls in love, or enjoys sex, they Fall".

"It is. I almost pity them, being unable to freely express and enjoy themselves." Akeno agreed.

"Don't bother. Most of them are so married to their jobs that it's practically hardwired into them. They're the types that practice what they preach so much that they'd be absolute shit at domestic life." Issei waved them off. "Fallen are unstable as fuck, but they're still leagues ahead of them when it actually comes to understanding others and adapting to life on terra firma and raising families."

Nobody had expected Issei to dismiss Heaven and Angels so viciously. Even Raynare had stopped trying to kill him with her eyeballs.

"Unstable?" Koneko tilted her head, confused. Unlike her, Akeno and Raynare suddenly appeared uncomfortable. Rias was too, albeit less so.

"It has to do with God's system and the Falling process. The flaw or action that made them what they are throws a metaphorical wrench into their otherwise idealized structure." Issei gave her a vague explanation. "A Fallen's sin is an extremely personal and private aspect of their being for several reasons. It's a part of their very definition. A conceptual scar. The closest comparison I can come up with is that it's akin to the relationship between a Dragon and their Nature."

A Dragon's Nature. After Issei's episode half a decade ago, the topic of Dragons in general had been all the rage for quite some time. Breeds. Notable figures. Physiology. Powers. Etc.

What most people weren't aware of until then was the subject of a Dragon's true Nature. Their goal. Their obsession. Their definition. Their meaning for existence.

All Dragons had one, but very few were ever truly aware of what their respective Nature was exactly. What was known though, was that Dragons did not take too kindly to outsiders interfering with the objects of their fascination. And they were not the most patient of creatures to begin with.

The number of Dragons throughout history whose Natures were known publically could be counted on one hand. For Issei to make an analogy underscored just how sensitive the topic was to other Fallen in general.

"That… makes sense." Koneko frowned in deep thought. She looked up at Issei and appeared as if she wanted to ask another question, but stopped herself at the last moment.

He hazarded a guess what she wanted to ask, but didn't even hint that he had done so.

"As enlightening as your lectures are, don't you think that we are a bit off topic?" Rias sighed. "We are here to train after all."

Issei looked at her skeptically before turning to Koneko with a raised eyebrow, accompanied by an unspoken question. It was clear he had doubts that the girl was in any state to do training at that moment.

To her credit, Koneko was self-aware enough to know exactly what he was getting at, and shifted on her feet with a faint blush on her face. "I'm fine."

"Hmmmm?" Issei seemed to close in on her almost immediately, looking down on the girl almost comically and almost giving the impression that she was shrinking while his deadpanning face grew bigger.

"I said I'm fine. Now get your ugly face away from me perv, before I punch it." Koneko held her ground, her embarrassment giving way to irritation and annoyance. Despite that though, her blush seemed to double in size and color.

For the briefest of moments the girls could have sworn that they saw his body sag slightly in genuine relief.

"Fufufu." Akeno giggled, enjoying the interaction between the pair.

The only male there shrugged off her threat as meaningless and took a step back. "Fine. Whatever you say Jailbait."

Rias shook her head, not knowing how she was going to deal with the two constantly taunting the other.

"Well?" Koneko almost demanded as Issei casually looked at her with an unreadable expression.

"Well what?"

"Train me."

"How?"

His question caught Koneko flatfooted. "What do you mean, how? Just do what you've been doing with everyone else you stupid perv."

"Fine then." Issei crossed his arms. "What are you? What are your strengths and weaknesses? Do you have any particular hobbies or skills that can be exploited?"

"I…"

"How strong can you hit? How much damage can you take? Do you have a Sacred Gear? Do you have any unique events in your background that exposed you to uncommon sources of power and or entities? Do you have any allergies? What is your familiar? Is it useful?"

"Stop!" Koneko shouted, finally putting an end to Issei's rapid fire questions with a pale expression. She turned to Rias frantically. "He did this to you too?"

"I, no." The King was almost as confused and overwhelmed as her Rook, looking to Issei for an explanation.

He pointed to Rias. "Gremory that can use the Power of Destruction."

Then to Akeno. "Yandere psycho Queen that excels in lightning based magic."

He jabbed his thumb behind him. "Standard Fallen grunt with a set kit that I'm already familiar with. Man Slave is a borderline copy for one of the most famous fictional blacksmiths in the past two decades. Dio is Dio. The Enabler is a Sitri, and I've already learned and prodded her Peerage on what they can do."

He pointed at Koneko. "You, are a midget Rook. That is all I have seen, and all I have been told. I can't work with that. The long term training I'm giving to everyone is to make what makes you barely special, into something that makes you stupid and unfair. Unless your Rook trait made you impossibly sturdy or strong compared to literally everyone else, you're going to have to give me something to work with. I wouldn't give a damn if you're secretly a descendant of the original Lucifer or whatever. I would just do something similar to you that I did to that other dumbass descendant that I kicked around for years. Just give me something already."

Rias held back a frown as she digested his words. Issei had a knack for bending the truth, but even this was extreme. He knew she was a nekomata. He knew she was Kuroka's sister. But he wanted her to say it for herself, and...

"Wait, did you just say that you know a descendant of the original Lucifer?"

"Details." He brushed her off as if the subject didn't matter in the slightest.

Her cheeks puffed out. She hated it when he threw out random subjects on the fly that distracted her only to disregard them as meaningless information an instant later.

Koneko shifted uncomfortably, clearly looking for any out she could to avoid the topic of being a nekomata. She knew that he was trying to get her to admit it, that he already knew what she was, but she wasn't ready yet. Even after learning the truth. Even though it probably was for the best if she did.

"I… know how to use Ki. But I haven't practiced in a while." She met him with an unexpected curveball though. A user of Chakra was a user of Ki, and anyone that could master Ki was a force to be reckoned with on the battlefield.

She wasn't ready for Chakra yet. Or to face her inner demons. But, she was at the very least prepared to take a few steps forward. Hopefully.

He gave her a flat look. One that was hard to read, but for once he appeared to be inspecting her instead of judging or expecting anything.

"Hah. Fine. I can work with that. You already know that this is going to take a while, right? Ki isn't something that we can just cover or learn a trick or two over the course of a weekend."

"Y-yeah." Koneko stood up a bit straighter, relieved that he was going with the charade.

"Then just review what you already know for now. The basics. Meditation and re-familiarizing yourself with the flow if your inner energies. You can show me what you got at the end of the weekend and then we'll work from there."

"Mmm." She nodded.

"Do you need anything for the time being? Review books? Meridian and life energy pathway charts and diagrams? Meditation 101 videos?"

She paused for a moment, trying to recall what she actually remembered, what she had available on the subject matter, and what she could get quickly. She did have some material on the matter, but most of it was gathering dust in a storage space that she rarely touched. "… I'll take the books."

She barely had time to react before a small stack of small books were tossed her way, catching them at the last moment.

"I expect them back intact."

"Did, did you actually expect this to happen before you even got here?" Rias was having trouble trying to determine whether to focus on Issei or the items he had lent Koneko at a moment's notice.

The books weren't that big individually, and they were clearly not new either, but they still almost stacked up to the small girl's shoulders in her arms. All of them had shown signs of being used before, and several had sticky notes popping out of all sides with surprisingly neat handwriting on them.

It was a bit of an assumption, but, Rias suspected that they were the books Issei personally used when he learned how to use Ki. She made a mental note to ask Koneko to have a look at them later when she had an opportunity.

"I have a bunch of stuff on me. I don't know everything. I only know what I know. I try to have some reference material on anything else I think might be useful at some point." He shrugged.

"Sounds handy." Akeno smiled, impressed. "At the very least, you certainly are one that tries to come prepared."

His cell phone with Gabriel's chanting on it. The Church gun. Books. Spray paint. The Dildos. Issei seemed to have something on him for any occasion. Was it out of obsession or paranoia though, no one could make an educated guess yet.

"It's better to be prepared than screwed over. Less to clean up afterwards." He brushed off the compliment automatically, as if what he was doing was simple common sense.

Koneko gave him a flat look. Even if he didn't lead her to this exact moment on purpose, the mere idea that it was a likely truth didn't appeal to her. Between the revelation of her sister's past, her emotional breakdowns, and Issei being Issei, she couldn't handle much more stress. "I'm going now."

"Have fun Jailbait. Don't hurt yourself on the big words."

"Fuck you, Pervert Batman." She snarked, turning to walk away without giving him another chance to respond.

Issei tilted his head to the side. "You know, that's actually not the first time someone's called me that."

"I wonder why." Even Rias knew of the famous American comic book character, and the fact that he practically had everything under the sun stored in his utility belt. The comparison was actually pretty accurate in retrospect.

"I think she's starting to like you." Akeno teased.

"That poor misguided child." He shook his head in pity, getting a couple of smirks from the girls around him.

"I'll keep an eye on her." Rias took a step towards Koneko's shrinking form. It would be a lie if she said it was purely for the girl's sake. In truth, she was curious as to what Issei could have written in the books he loaned her Rook. "Is there anything you need before I go?"

Issei looked at her for a moment before clearly remembering something. "Actually, can I use your shower and a spare room in your clubhouse?"

"Oh my." Akeno swooned.

"I thought you were going to train in the field." Rias pointed to the sports field where the paint he had sprayed several hours ago was almost dried.

"I am. It's for the Cougar." He jabbed his thumb back at Raynare, who was fading between consciousness and a blissful coma.

"Her?" The revelation caught both Devils off guard.

"Yeah." He nodded, unashamed. "I think I might have overdid it a little. If I don't do something remotely immediately beneficial to her soon, I think she really might try to kill me in my sleep. Which would be annoying."

Truth be told, he wouldn't have been surprised if she attempted to stab his kidneys from behind right now if she wasn't so exhausted.

Rias and Akeno looked at one another skeptically before glancing at Raynare's exhausted form. They, really couldn't argue with that logic. Nor could they determine if Raynare was conscious or not.

"That does seem to be a problem you would likely have." Akeno agreed with him, completely honest. "I'm surprised it hasn't happened already."

"I have to perpetually remind her that I cook her food whenever things get bad." He lamely revealed his secret, walking over to the fallen Fallen and hoisting her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes with ease.

"I thought you carried her like a princess…" Rias was slightly disappointed by the unromantic sight.

"She isn't liable to regurgitate all over me right now." He shamelessly shifted her a few times with one arm while giving an unnaturally proud thumbs up with the other. "She started to dry heave after the two hour mark, so I know she doesn't have anything left to spew."

"Well, there goes one fantasy." Akeno sighed, sending Rias a sly look, knowing exactly what her King was possibly hoping for in the near future. Issei was an ass, but he was not bad looking in the slightest. Getting the bridal treatment from him wouldn't have been too bad so long as he kept his mouth shut. "I do hope you aren't using this as an excuse to skip my training though, Issei-kun."

"Already have something for you in mind. We can go over it while we walk." Issei already started to make way for the clubhouse.

The King and Queen exchanged a quick glance at one another before Rias gave a helpless shrug. "Might as well show him where everything is in the clubhouse while you're at it just to be safe. I'll look after Koneko in the meanwhile."

"I'll try to keep things clean and steer him away from our secret places." The newly designated guide gave her a saucy grin.

"Just to let you know, my room stocks more custom sex toys than some specialty shops. I highly doubt whatever you two are hiding will impress me." Issei factually stated behind them accusingly, as if daring them to try and rise up to the challenge.

"I thought you said you don't masturbate." Akeno steered the bait in a new direction just as quickly, while Rias' face quickly tried to match hue with her hair. While she was fairly open about her sexuality and her habits, she was normally in control when the topics were brought up in conversation. Having them brought up out of the blue on the other hand left her completely unguarded and exposed.

"I don't. If you paid attention to the past three hours, you'd know that I make and sell the things as a side business, along with writing reviews and articles for porn outlets. They fuck. I make bank from home. Everyone wins."

"Ara? How interesting." Akeno's grin widened as her mind started to concoct devious ideas. "However, I'm pretty sure that having a side occupation of any kind would go against school rules. Sona-san wouldn't take too well to this fact when she remembers this."

Issei waved her off easily, turning to walk to the clubhouse. "I doubt that'll be a problem. She'll keep her nose out of my business, or she'll have to stick her nose into it. Which means she'd have to learn who some of my clientele are."

"And that would be a problem because?" Rias didn't understand what Issei was getting at.

"It means that my services are indiscriminate and cater, but are not limited, to humans, Fallen, and Devils. Of all societal ranks and occupations."

The only thing anyone could hear for several seconds was Issei's footsteps as he walked away from them as the girls eventually realized what he was hinting at.

Akeno turned to Rias with puppy dog eyes, her eyes begging without shame as she bounced on the balls of her feet like a child on sugar. "You have to let me be there when Sona learns of this. I want to see everything."

It wasn't for the first time that Rias pondered just how well Issei's and Akeno's personalities would mesh if given the chance. The two were so subconsciously sadistic and built for exploiting and basking in the humiliation of others it was scary.

Well, maybe a few minutes of private talking and training would help… or turn the situation into a potential inconsolable train wreck like with Koneko. One of the two.

Rias mentally paused upon realizing just where her mind had taken her. Normally she was less, flippant, about the potential severe mental anguish of her peerage as a consequence of someone's actions.

Damn it Issei.

She pinched the bridge of her nose, which Akeno mistook for a reaction to her own actions. "Just, just go with Issei and try not to push him too hard. You know how he likes to turn things against people if they're taken too far."

The Queen's energy dropped significantly, clearly disappointed by Rias' lack of a guarantee to what would undoubtedly be an amazing show. With a controlled bow and a fixed smile, she relented. "… As you wish."

Rias held back a reaction, knowing that Akeno wasn't pleased with her dismissal. Despite the front she put up, her best friend could be quite a selfish child at times. That, and she couldn't help but agree with Issei that her Queen's fake smile was a bit off putting. "Stop sulking and go already. You'll learn something interesting to waste your time on soon enough. I know I have."

"Hai hai." The Queen turned and walked briskly to catch up to the annoying teen in question.

The King couldn't help but sigh in frustration. At the rate things were going, she couldn't tell if her Peerage was going to get used to Issei or wind up self-destructing from their insecurities being constantly poked. Gasper and Koneko were somehow surprisingly turning out better than she had thought, but Kiba and Akeno…

"Issei. You're being rude, not waiting for me." Akeno chided as she jogged lightly to where he was, her massive breasts bouncing with each step she took.

"I can't waste that much time on you. The longer I wait, the higher a chance the Cougar will shank me while I carry her like this." Issei didn't slow down, but he did sneak more than a few unsubtle peeks at her breasts defying the laws of physics.

Seriously, what sort of mystical reality defying skin cream does that woman use to ensure that she doesn't get premature stretch marks?! Most human women would have surgery to reduce the breast size just to avoid those at this point!

Unconsciously, he sniffed the air quickly to see if she was using any product. Sakura petals? He didn't know any compounds that used those. Must be perfume.

… It wasn't bad though. Not obnoxious or overpowering like what most girls wore. It was almost soothing actually.

"Ara? Well, when you put it like that, I can't really blame you. That woman does give a rather unreliable impression." Leave it to her to make an easy jab when available.

And like that his curiosity was gone.

"Yeah well, she still does her job when needed, so I'll give her that." Surprisingly, Issei didn't follow through with the roasting. So much so that Akeno blinked in momentary surprise by his words.

"Really? That's rather unexpected. Half of what either of you do is complain about the other."

"That's because outside of dealing with me, she's got an easy job. Say what you want about her personality and work ethic, she's still been a spy for years. Unlike the Devils here, I wouldn't be able to peg her as a non-human from a crowd at first glance if she was on her game. That alone indicates she's more capable than most."

Sign number one that the non-human female you are with is possibly a spy: she regularly uses bras with proper bust support. Note: investigate further for additional patterns.

Akeno paused in mid step as Issei's words sunk in, and looked at Raynare's slump form over his back. It was hard to see the mouthy and bitter woman as any form of competent spy, or possess a hint of subtlety, but then again, it was rare that she was seen not near Issei either. It was widely accepted that Issei had a habit of purposefully getting on everyone's nerves and prodded at their insecurities one way or another. That being said, it could also be reasoned that none of the Peerages had ever actually seen what Raynare was like at the top of her game without any real distractions around.

All in all, it was the closest thing to a public compliment he had ever given Raynare.

"Eeeh? Is that right?" She quickened her step to catch up to Issei again, her fake smile once more back in place, and smug with confidence as she noticed him trying to not ogle her chest again. She decided to give him a little service by arcing her back just a bit to make her breasts more prominent. "Well, I guess she's good for something then."

His ogling stopped, and his eyes were replaced with annoyance. "… You know, you're embarrassing not only yourself, but the Weeb as well when you act like that, right?"

Once more he caught her by surprise. So much so that she forgot to be angry or annoyed. "Excuse me?"

"The Cougar's a Cougar, but if I had to compare the seducing abilities between you, she'd win every time, and it's not because I'm sucking up to her ego so she won't stab me." He stood his ground.

Behind him, a faint golden light slowly died off, as if trying not to be noticed.

Akeno wasn't smiling anymore. Even if it had been for a moment, she had forgotten just how easily he could get under her skin the moment he set his sights on her. "I fail to see what your point is."

Issei rolled his eyes. "Your fake smile. Your uninterested eyes. Every tempt you make is just a hollow bluff. You're a child that happens to have a good body and likes teasing other children. A schoolyard bully that just happens to be bigger than the other kids and knows it. You don't want sex. Hell, you likely haven't even blown a guy before. You tease all the time, but you probably don't even know what to do if your bluff was ever called. Any idiot with genuine training in the seduction arts, politics, and reading others would be able to peg you for a novice with a single glance. That includes probably half of the older generation nobility that the Weeb has introduced you to. I can only imagine just how much patronizing they did every time you tried that weak shit around them and their entourages. Zechs has probably had to cover your ass behind the scenes a few times more than a few times after you left the room and have them disregard you as mere eye candy."

He shifted Raynare on his shoulder. "At least the Cougar knows that if she tries that shit in the real world, there's a chance that she'd have to put out one way or another eventually. And you know what? She'd probably knows how to do it well too. Because she knows that she can't bluff through everything."

Akeno had stopped walking again.

He, he did NOT just say what she think he just said, did he? This boy that had done nothing but a shut in for half a decade is really trying to lecture her about seducing others?

Without even noticing it, sparks of electricity began to spark around her, reflecting her weakening hold over her emotions.

"You… I find it rather hypocritical that you chide me for my behavior when you mouth off to everyone perpetually."

If Issei was worried about her gathering power, he didn't bother to show it. "It's not hypocritical if I actually can and am willing to back up what I say."

The arcs of energy increased around her. "And what of your claims earlier that you can beat us easily? Without tricks or your Sacred Gear?"

He rolled his eyes and flexed his free hand, gathering some power in the process. "Stop showboating and zap me already."

He pretended not to feel Raynare's body stiffen in alarm on his shoulder as he called Akeno's bluff.

For a brief moment, it looked like the Queen was beginning to have second thoughts, what with Issei not backing down from her threats in the slightest. However his cold, unimpressed gaze seemed to push her over the edge. With a frustrated yell, she threw her hands forward, manifesting and shooting several bolts of lightning at Issei.

The target, at the same time lazily swiped his free hand to the side, trailing several smaller lines of electricity in front of his body straight to a nearby guardrail.

In high speed, Akeno watched as her significantly stronger and more violent attack approach Issei, but then suddenly get swept up in the trails he had made and strike the nearby rod as if it was her target all along with a loud bang.

The abrupt reversal and display of magic had caught her completely off guard. Almost as much as the fact that she had actually attacked him out of childish anger. "… I thought you said you were a fire specialist."

"I am. Naturally at least." Issei inspected his fingers, watching the small sparks of electricity dance between them. "Pure fire magic isn't really that helpful when it comes to the medical field and diagnostics though. Or for anything that doesn't involve mindless destruction. I trained to control it, and a couple of other small tricks, but never bothered with much more than that. Believe it or not, I prefer to waste my time on things that are actually productive. White and electrical elemental magic are far more useful and applicable to all sorts of fields, so that's what I spent the most time practicing, even though I have next to no natural talent in them. Easier to practice subtly without risk as well."

"No talent?" She looked at the obliterated metal and held back a wince. Sona was definitely not going to be happy when she saw that they had destroyed school property. "I may still be in school, but I am already known as the Lightning Priestess in several circles. There are not many that could take away control of my elemental magic."

"Then you haven't met the right people." If there was a compliment in her words, Issei didn't hear it. "There's more to magic than just power. Physics matters. Even a hundred of me wouldn't be able to compare to the electrical output you have. But you're sloppy. Crude. Too heavily dependent on Devil Magic basics and your natural talents."

"I… that doesn't explain what you did though." Akeno tried to piece together what Issei was saying, but she still came up with a blank. "Even if you were as strong as me, your magic should have clashed with mine instead of redirected it."

As if giving up on the conversation, Issei rolled his eyes and turned around to walk towards the clubhouse again. "You know, for an electrical specialist, you know surprisingly little about your element. Electricity is energy in a state of extreme imbalance. Electrons naturally flowing from high concentration to low concentration via the path of least resistance. Basic electrical users use their magic to either force this power in directions that it wouldn't flow, or it makes said path of least resistance in the direction they want, while also generating the attack simultaneously."

She didn't even notice the fact that she was walking quickly to catch up to him. "… That doesn't make sense. Devil Magic is based off of imagination and intent. Even if you simply made a new path of your own with your spells, even if they were of the same nature, they still should have clashed. It goes against one of Merlin's basic rules of inter system thaumaturgy."

"Hooh? You actually bothered to know the rules?" He sounded almost amused.

"Of course I do. Any Devil that intends to specialize on magic learns them. We may not use human Magic, but that doesn't mean we can't learn from it."

"So you know about the second reason why Magicians make pacts with Devils."

There were three common and publically accepted reasons why these sorts of pacts were made. Protection. Information. And, in the case the Devil was well known, Reputation.

While Human and Devil Magic were different, there was a wide plethora of subjects that Devils could assist Humans on in their research, be it spells, artifacts, techniques, general knowledge, or otherwise…

… However what wasn't said or understood as often was that Devils often learned just as much as Humans in this regard. Technology in the underworld developed at roughly a similar rate to earth's because Devils were always watching Humans innovate and learn. Whatever was developed down there were just modifications of what humans made.

Advanced Magic theory, was no different in several ways. Devils and other races would always be superior as a species when it came to enacting magic. But Humans were the species of knowledge and obsessing over trying to understand what they did not, the intricacies of everything. When it came to discovering something new or old, they would always be among the first to try and write down every fact possible.

"I do. However I haven't made a pact yet with anyone. It isn't recommended for any Devil to make one until we finish our primary education for the sake of time constraints." She had a feeling he was leading her to a conclusion but couldn't see it yet.

"That, and to protect younger Devils from rushing into pacts like idiots without thinking first and getting stuck in crappy situations." He surmised. "So I assume you know about the adapted rules for elemental Devil Theory then."

"The less against Nature and the local laws a spell's intended nature will be, the less magic it will take to enact." She recited word for word. It was simple and self-explanatory. Using fire magic to heat things was less cost intensive than using water magic to do the same action. The latter was possible, but far more expensive.

"Mmm. So using that logic, wouldn't it be possible to manipulate your lightning with my magic via natural physics so long as I am able to supersede the authority of your intended spell?"

"If that was so easy, people would have learned and done it in large numbers already." Influencing and disregarding another's magic was not an easy thing to do, and almost always required a significant amount of power to back it up.

Issei let out a hum that was almost a chuckle, as if she had said exactly what he had expected. "You sure about that?"

Akeno frowned in confusion. "What on earth are you talking about?"

He waved his hand behind him, fingers splayed wide open. "There's already a magic that allows others to supersede the spells and natural energies of others. A common one that all species have used for years."

On one finger, electricity sparked faintly.

On another, the tip glowed pure white.

She froze in her steps, her eyes wide open.

White magic? Healing magic?

Wait. Wait wait wait wait wait. It couldn't be.

"You… You're a battle medic?"

Issei paused before looking at her confused. "Battle what now?"

"You used white magic to sublimate the intent and control of my attack, and electrical elemental magic combined with physics to redirect it. Synchronizing white magic with other elements to take control over the spells of others."

Even unconscious, a person's natural energies always strove to protect its host from threats and irregular influences, be it internal or external. Despite this, White magic users still managed to cast spells to alter and heal the target directly. Their spells were designed to synchronize or bypass the natural defenses of the patient's body… their magic.

It was a relatively new role of specialists that had debuted in Rating Games only recently. Due to the difficulty of the style of combat, synchronizing one's magic with an opponent's signature in the middle of battle, only a handful of Bishops and Queens could manage to utilize it efficiently in fights. But, the results were unquestionable.

Battle Medics were remarkably useful in whatever teams they were in. They were top tier support as healers, and as counter specialists for enemy mages.

But their most renowned traits came from the fact that if they got their hands on their targets, it was almost a guaranteed kill regardless of what natural and magical defenses their targets had. Their white magic enabled them to bypass literally everything with terrifying ease.

TLDR? They were White Mage Assassin hybrids with anti-magic tricks that almost guaranteed them to OHKO almost anything they got their hands on regardless of the power difference.

"No, I mean… Battle Medics? They actually stuck with that?" He gave her a strained look. "'Zaz you, fucking lazy prick."

"I don't follow. You sound like you were involved in making the style."

Surprisingly, Issei began to sulk like a child that didn't get their way. "Battle Medic was the supposed to be placeholder name until someone came up with something that was actually decent. I wanted to call it Caduceus, or something else badass like that, but noooo, the others wanted to hold off on any names that might piss off the other pantheons or pay royalties. Cheap bastards. Not like the Greeks already make a boatload from loaning out their names to practically a third of the fantasy franchises that hit mainstream."

Word on the street was Hera had become a monster in the court of law after having who knows how many incidents with Zeus that either ended in domestic violence or her husband paying child support. So much so that she apparently had her own law firm set up with a rather impressive track record.

"A-ara. It, sounds like you've had a hand in quite a number of projects." Akeno's fake smile this time was more a poor attempt to hide her inability to keep up with Issei. The more she learned about him, the more she questioned just who the hell this guy was in the first place.

She blinked as something caught her attention though. "Issei…"

"Of course they didn't bother changing the name to something decent. Not like anyone ever listens to me whenever it wasn't important to them. Stupid Angels. Stupid Zaz. Stupid ass-"

Thunk. "Gah!?"

Issei's petulant grumbling was cut short as he walked face first into the ORC clubhouse door.

"We're here." Akeno lamely pointed out three seconds too late. It wasn't on purpose. She'd swear it.

He gave her a deadpan glare, daring her to say what was really on her mind.

"After you." She smiled innocently.

He continued to stare at her, glanced at the door, and back at her. "Did the Weeb turn off the security spells on the place?"

"Now you're just being paranoid." She sighed. The ORC building was decked out with safety features, but nothing genuinely over the top.

His stare intensified. "Was 'Zechs, a registered Sis-con and man that more often than not throws far too much of his vast range of power and resources into petty things that have his attention, given an opportunity to get involved in the making of this place and its defenses while your backs were turned?"

It took a few seconds for his words to sink in, and the result was for one of Akeno's delicate eyebrows to start twitching. "… Fine. I'll walk you in if it'll make you happy."

"Registered. Sis-con." Issei hissed, stressing the words as if they were all that was needed to validate his paranoia.

It had been years since he had seen the current Lucifer, but the hours upon hours he had been forced to endure while Sirzechs had gushed over his wife, son, and sister, complete with a genuine photo reel and baby stories, were enough to traumatize anyone.

Serafall's rendition on the other hand, was only bearable only because she had just one person to gush over.

"Just come in already." Akeno gave into her urge to roll her eyes and opened the door, disarming the security on the building. She had all but given up on trying to stay angry at him for his behavior. She had learned too many surprising facts about him in too short of a time to be able to stick to any one particular topic, and it was starting to give her a headache.

The pair traveled through the first floor of the building in relative silence. Said first floor was actually as dilapidated as the outside to keep up appearances, despite the insulation and foundation being intact and still in pristine condition. Only the upper floors and the basement were actually used by the club in earnest.

"Come to think of it, you never did explain what you have intended for me." The guide gave Issei a curious look. "I do hope you have something monumental saved up."

"It'll do, but it won't save that trainwreck of a seduction game you're playing." Issei shot her down instantly.

The upperclassman frowned but didn't let her anger get the better of her this time. She had already been suckered into his pace once already and wasn't going to fall for it again. Instead, she settled for sticking her nose up in the air and dismissing him. "That's amusing, coming from someone that can't even talk to people properly. At least I can play the game. You probably wouldn't even know how to satisfy a woman if you had the chance."

And like that, instead of getting drawn into another game, she had unintentionally started a new one that she had absolutely no hope of winning.

Inside Issei's soul, Ddraig groaned. The girl just had to call him out on this topic, didn't she?

"… Oh really?" He turned on her with a mad glint in his eyes that caught her by surprise. "How much do you want to bet on that?"

"Wh-what? A bet?"

"Yes." He borderline hissed like some sort of stereotypical villain.

"Wait, you actually are going to try and seduce someone?" Akeno tried to keep up with Issei's madness, but only resulted with her mind burning out. Stop changing the mood whenever you feel like it!

"That's right. A bet. An erotic, un-kosher, dirty little bet between the wannabe dirty minded virgin Yandere, and the porn obsessed anti-social shut-in." It wasn't hard to tell that Issei had clearly taken her accusations of his supposed inexperience very personally if the strained tone and slightly mad gleam in his eyes was any indication. "That is, if you think you can manage it."

"I-is that so? I didn't think an unstable wreck like you would manage to muster the nerve to start something like this." Akeno instinctively held up her hands in front of her body. This wasn't the first time a male of questionable intent approached her, but it wasn't often that she felt like any of them had a hope of actually doing anything to her. Even so, she wasn't going to surrender to his manic behavior just yet and cow to him like everyone else did whenever he got the slightest bit agitated. Her pride would not let her. "What are you thinking? Do keep in mind that I have standards that will not be crossed."

"Don't worry. It won't be anything beyond your low hanging threshold." He crooned, holding up a finger, and generated a tiny ball of magical energy. "I bet, that with just this much magic, and my skills, you won't be able to last the weekend without rubbing one out while thinking about me."

A normal person his age wouldn't dream of making a challenge like this.

A normal person wasn't used to dealing with Devils and completely comfortable with their significantly reduced inhibitions.

Her face turned as red as her King's hair. "H-huh? Wait. Me? As in-?"

"Battery testing. Self-pleasuring. Clit beating. Ménage a moi. Finger painting. Fucking masturbation. Don't tell me you don't even know how to do that."

"I know what you meant!" She snapped, her polite shell finally shattering. "You think I'd actually, that you are able to seduce me?"

She didn't know what she was having more trouble believing. The contents of the bet, or the fact that Issei was actually taking the initiative with her, and going far past even what she was willing to do.

"As for the terms." Issei went on, her question completely disregarded.

"Don't ignore me!"

He ignored her. "I'll keep it simple because you're new to this. If I win, you have to order a sex toy through the store I run. And if you win, I'll make you a sex toy of your choice free of charge. Oh, and loser has to admit that the other is their superior in all things sex related."

"I don't need any more toys to begin with!" Her eyes were spinning now, completely unable to keep up and unable to filter out what she was saying. "N-no! Never mind that! Why are you so determined to get me to masturbate? Is that your fetish? Do you get off thinking about getting other people to get off?"

"I don't masturbate."

"No one believes that!"

"And for someone who is so comfortable teasing others about their sexual habits, you're embarrassingly easy when put on the defensive. Of course, that's to be expected from someone with no actual experience whatsoever."

… Oh he did not just say that.

Sparks and bolts of magical electricity were arcing around the irritated Queen. The fact she was being called out by this boy of all people was infuriating. She was one of the great Onee-sans of Kuoh. Men and women melt under her teasing and whims. She's folded more people just by smiling at them than she can count, and yet he's calling her bluff?

This simply could not stand.

"Ara. It sounds like someone is rather confident in himself." It took a good deal of self-control to regain her composure. It took three times as much to not zap him in in any way. "So much so that I wonder if he's interested in upping the stakes."

"Bring it." Self-respect was for scrubs. Like Azazel.

"Loser is the slave for the winner for a week."

"Not interested." He instantly shot her down with a dead look.

"Scared?"

"No. I'm just not interested in bossing you around for a week. And you'd probably be unable to stand being close enough to order me around after a few days in the imaginary timeline where you do win. Either way, the victor would be just as miserable as the loser." He reasoned logically.

She glared at him. Angry at his dismissal, and even angrier that deep down, she knew he was right.

But she couldn't leave it at that. She would never let herself get over it if she let him have the final say. If only there was something that she could use against the pervert. Something that she knew he didn't, or wouldn't normally…

"Fine then." She smiled confidently, taking a step closer to him with a sultry look. "Loser has to masturbate. In. Full. View. Of the winner."

Much to her disappointment though, the biggest reaction she got out of Issei was some confused blinking and a slight tilt of his head. "But I don't masturbate."

"That's my point." She tried to keep her irritation from showing again.

"… Ooooh." For someone supposedly so smart, he could be a bit of an idiot at times.

She couldn't help but frown this time. "You sound awfully disinterested in the prospect of watching someone of my stature pleasure herself in person despite the contents of the wager in the first place."

"You are vastly underestimating the amount of porn I have watched." He dismissed her observation while looking at his hands, as if seriously trying to decide which one he should use to do the deed with should the need ever arrive. "I'm not blind. You are beautiful. Exceptionally so, even by non-human standards. But between porn and the fact that I've been psychologically shafted by a good number of visually appealing women, one free show isn't going to do much."

Akeno clicked her tongue. He seemed to have an answer to everything she threw at him. He was unflappable. He seemed to just take any extreme or humiliating risk as if it was normal, but at the same time freaked out over the dumbest… little…