A Glimpse through Rafa's eyes

-Rafa's Pov

Driving the carriage, I feel calm; it is surprising how a few days ago, I didn't even know who I was or what my goals were,

"Rafa sister, if you are exhausted, I can drive" Jue peeked out from the window of the carriage towards the front,

"It is fine, Jue. I feel good driving," I told him truthfully. Jue is a good boy; he is very obedient to Ryu and me too. He offers me help every time and even gives his best in the dungeons.

"I wanted to drive though…." Jue said his face looked a bit sad,

'It is his sleeping time', I thought and told him I was not exhausted. Jue is good overall and very helpful but sometimes pushes himself too hard when it comes to dungeon bosses who are too strong. He will still ask to fight and pouts when he can't help defeat them.

'He is a good and helpful kid,' I thought as I adjusted my grip on the reins. I still do not know what I was before I met Ryu, Aiena, and Jue, but I think it doesn't matter recently. I do not want to remember painful memories anymore; I am not restless without them anymore.

"Rafa sister, are you doing fine?" Ryu asked me from behind; his voice always seemed gentle when he talked to me, leaving the time he scolded me, but he pats me afterward, so it was fine,

"It is Rafa, big sister! Also, horses are exhausted," I told him, as I felt Arion and Glad were slowing down but trying to keep their pace their best, I named them, and they are excellent horses. They never complain and are very loyal to us, I remembered how they kicked a villager back in a village, and Aiena had us apologizing.

'Why did we apologize? That person was bothering Arion and Glad' I secretly praised both of the good kids back then and even gave them special treats Ryu bought to give them occasionally.

"Village is near but…." Ryu stared at me, and he looked confused,

'I must help him as his bigger sister!!' I thought as I thought hard about what we should do,

'Should we go to the village or should we camp…. Or should I ask Ryu to pat me?' the choices were challenging, but the last one seemed best to me, but it wouldn't help us. It'll feel good, though,

"Village is just one or so km away, Rafa sister. Can you ask Arion and Glad whether they can run that much?" Ryu told me; although Ryu mostly acts bash and cunning in front of others, I knew Ryu was very good. He always considers horse's rest too,

"Arian, Glad can you keep going? Or do you need rest?" I asked them while loosing the reins,

"Neigh Neigh, Neighhh", both of them replied. Even though they just neigh, I can understand what they say in my mind somehow,

'We can work hard!! Just double our treat for the night, miss' this is what Arion said, and Glad just said,

'Yes, yes,'

"Ryu, we can keep going," I told Ryu, and he gave me a thumbs up as he came to sit with me in front. Aiena scolded him for opening the gate and coming forward in the middle while the carriage moved.

Aiena looks pretty and cute but is always so protective and scolds a lot. She is gentle but can be scary when she is serious about making us apologize or anything related to manners, although she doesn't look scary. Ryu told me,

"Making Aiena sad and disappointed is scary itself", and I agreed with that strongly. I wouldn't want her to be sad or disappointed with me. Ryu and I talked about various things as the village was nearing.

...

"Big brother, are we really going to the dungeon?" Jue asked Ryu with shining eyes,

"Yes, this dungeon was in the way of Illusia, so I told Pearl party we'll take this one", Ryu replied with a grin, and Jue punched twice in the air,

"Big brother, is this dungeon big?"

"As big as the one as Targan one", Ryu replied simply as we set the camp near the village with the carriage. Aiena was cooking food for everyone. She cooks tasty food; before meeting her, I felt like I'd been eating raw meat forever. I never knew food could be this tasty.

Jue was staring at Ryu and me alternatingly, and Ryu finally asked him,

"What is it, Jue?"

"I wanted to beat this dungeon boss, but I don't want to repeat the promise mistake like last time" as he said this, Jue's face looked pitiful. I was about to say yes, but Ryu spoke before I could,

"Jue, if the boss is below the level or equal to Targan, you can fight it alone, but if it is something way stronger, then I can't promise anything" even though it seemed like being tough, it was actually smart, it was because of me making a stupid promise I couldn't help Ryu earlier last time,

"It is meat today!!" Aiena announced cheerfully, and Ryu's eyes shined. It is always fun to see Ryu eat. He is thin even though he ate so much,

"Ryu, if you eat too much you'll get bellyache in the dungeon!!" Aiena warned with a stern gaze,

"if that happens, Aiena can just fix me with her miracle," Ryu said, filling his mouth with meat, and I, too, began eating.

'Tasty, it is so soft!!' I couldn't help but keep wishing for more of this kind of food. It is so tasty Aiena ate only a little, and Jue ate more than her.

"Big brother, can we go to the dungeon already?" Jue pleaded with puppy eyes, I wanted to fight monsters too for exercise, so I, too, pulled Ryu's sleeve,

"What happened Rafa big sister?" he asked me,

"I want to go to the dungeon too," I said, feeling excited as Ryu sighed and nodded,

'I love dungeons; there, I can be a proper big sister and protect Ryu, Aiena, and Jue.'

We prepared to go to the dungeons, and I gave Airon and Glad their treat after putting the carriage near the Dungeon gate.

"Arion, Glad, don't let anyone steal you!!" I made a fist sign, and both horses nodded and neighed,

'Leave it to us, miss.'

'Yes, will care.'

Both of them said, and I went back in front of the gate where Ryu and the others were standing,

"If something like Drake dungeon happens, we will give Rafa sister lead, okay?" Ryu said, and everyone nodded,

This kind of dungeon was simple for us now. Ryu and Jue killed monsters as Aiena healed them, and when monsters came from an unexpected direction, I provided support,

The dungeon was simple, and the monsters were dumb too.

"Ryu behind!!" I shouted as I rushed forward and kicked the kobold away while Ryu sliced the head of the one trying to attack from behind.

"[Inferno charge]! [Gravel Claw]!!" Jue shouted, and soon his fist was covered in rocks, and then it glowed like magma. The way he punched kobold made them seem pitiful, as they had burn marks on their body,

"[Gravel Shot]!!" as he said this further, the rocks from his hand launched toward the monsters hitting them.

While I was looking at Jue, a larger Kobold rushed toward Ryu,

"You can't!!" I shouted as I punched the kobold away, and Ryu thanked me. I feel happy whenever I protect him. Even when I think about what happened two days before when I overheard Ryu's conversation with Fiona, my heart gets all fuzzy and warm,

'Rafa sister is an important part of Fusion Souls'

'Rafa is my older sister…' yes, I won't ever leave Ryu and others. They are my family.

Suddenly a scene filled with darkness with a huge wolf chained down appeared in my head,

'No, don't do this!!' I heard the voice of someone whom I believed to be me. I don't want to remember this. I want to have new memories, the ones that don't hurt, and I do not have to panic to remember,

As the darkness from my memories, I don't remember, ultimately takes over my head, I feel his touch. Nowadays, I don't need to be scared of getting lost in the emptiness and redness of losing memories.

"Rafa, big sister, are you okay?" Ryu's patting my head, I felt relieved before he saved me from the world that was all red,

'I don't need these!! I am happy now!!' the memories I don't want to remember left my head, and the face of Ryu overlapped with the day we met the first time,

'If something is scaring you, we will hide you… even if it is from the whole world' my first memories I can remember without much effort, words that pulled me out of everlasting redness,

"I am fine, Ryu. My head just ached a bit", I replied, and Ryu asked with a concerned expression,

"Did you remember something Rafa sister?"

"It's Rafa big sister! And I didn't," I replied with my cheeks puffing without me realizing. He patted me a bit.

'Should I tell him… I no longer want to remember,' I thought, confused., Ryu always asks me once in a while if my memories are coming back. earlier, I tried my best to remember things, but now,

'I am trying my best to not remember….'

"Rafa sister, dodge!!" Jue's voice came in my ears, and I reflexively kicked back, making a hole in it,

'I feel if I remember my memories, I'll have to leave Ryu and others…. A fear which makes already painful glimpses of memories more fearful.'

We kept going in deeper into the boss room. As Jue fought the Great hound named boss monster, Ryu told him his moves and skills.

'it is strange how Ryu always knows the names and skills of monsters, ' I sometimes wonder. I was ready to save Jue if anything happened.

"I did it!!" Jue smiled as he defeated the monster alone, and Ryu praised him as Aiena moved to heal and dismantle the boss; Jue was telling me excitedly, too, so I couldn't help but praise him. It makes me more sure,

'I'll always keep looking over them and saving them, they'll hide me, and I'll protect him, this is my place.'