Hello little monster, I’m Rose

[two weeks later]

Jemisha treatment went well and to her it wasn't as pain full like last time, the only frustration she had was that she couldn't go out for a run when she felt like running because her leg would hurt.

She told Chris and he promised as soon as she was done they would go out for a run with her. He suggested to her instead of running to use the swimming pool instead.

Chris although his treatment hurt a lot, he hid it from Jemisha but she caught on to it and told him if he was in pain he should just tell her instead of hiding it.

'I know you don't like to show your monsters, but how do you expect me to understand your monsters if you keep them in.'

'I didn't hide them from you the first time I was here, why should you.'

Chris hugged her and broke down.

Jemisha sighed in relieve, 'Even if you lash out, I know you don't mean it, I know how much it hurts, please don't hide from me,' she gave him a kiss, 'Remember what I said; the good and the bad, we will get through it and we will come out victorious.'

'And since I'm in less pain than last time I can support you better than I could hope for.'

'Sure I get frustrated when I can't do thing when I want to do them, but still I tell you and you still suggested me to take swims instead of running.'

'So just tell me what you want to do? If you want to stay in bed that's fine, if you want to go somewhere I'll drive you.'

"I'm so useless at the moment… all I want is to stay like this till the psychologist comes."

'Sure thing…'Jemisha gave him another kiss and let his head rest on her chest.

After an hour the psychologist came by and Jemisha woke up Chris.

He got up and but it hurt and he cursed under his breath.

'Don't worry, take your time, I'll get the door.'

Jemisha took a deep breath and opened the door, when she was so close to him she looked warry at him but let him in and she went up to Chris.

She saw he had some trouble getting up so she went over to help him, but he lashed out to her.

Jemisha smiled 'Hello little monster, I'm Rose, nice to meet you.'

Chris looked at her dumbfounded.

The psychologist saw how she reacted to his outburst and found it quite interesting.

She finally got Chris up and helped him to the couch.

When he sat down "I'm sorry about that Rose…"

She shook her head 'No need to apologize, I told you to show me the monster otherwise I won't understand them. It's fine and I don't feel hurt.'

She then walked over to the other side of the room and sat down in a chair.

"Seems you girlfriend still is warry of me, but at least she doesn't look at me like she is going to kill me."

Chris chuckled a little.

"Well it's the fourth time that you are here, and going from looking murderous to looking warry in such a short time is good progress on her part."

"So you lashed out to her just now. Why did you do that?"

"I think because I'm frustrated because I'm in a lot of pain but I don't want to look weak in front of her."

"Well she did tell me this would hurt a lot, and I can't imagine in how much more pain she was when she had a sped up treatment."

"She on the other hand doesn't seem to be in much pain."

"Hold up", the psychologist looked at Jemisha "You were the first patient that endured a sped up process?"

'Yeh so…It's true that it was hell, but what else could I do in order to escape a psychopath…well in the end I shot him through the head, because he had to push my last button.'

'But you're not here for me but for Chris.'

Jemisha drew her line and was ready to pull up her wall if he kept pressing her.

The psychologist then turned to Chris, "So you feel inferior to her."

"I guess I do."

"When you lashed out to her she really made you speechless with her response didn't she.

"She did, before you came we were talking, and she noticed I was hiding from her."

"She said; I know you don't like to show your monsters, but how do you expect me to understand your monsters if you keep them in."

"Well it's understandable you don't want to show them, but does she ever hide her monsters?"

"She never did, she is very open about her emotion, although she doesn't mean it when she lash out to me I understand that much, and when she had lashed out to me she would apologize."

"Chris, why don't you lean on her more? She has been where you are now."

"Yeh sure she gets frustrated sometimes and she probably feel helpless also, because she doesn't know how to help you when you don't really know how to express your feelings and emotions yourself."

"In my opinion she handled your outburst very well, I never seen anybody react so positive like she did."

"Rose?, what would you like for him to do so you can have a better grip on handling certain situation."

'Not much, cry if you feel the need to, scream when you can't handle the pain, and above all else, stop hiding from me. I'll welcome all the monsters inside you and I will give them all my love, because they are a part of you.'

"Chris broke down and Jemisha got up and hugged him."

'It's oké…I'm here for you.'

Chris calmed down again and she gave him a kiss and whispered something to him and he smiled.

Jemisha's phone went off and she saw it was Iris.

'Chris, Iris is calling, is it alright if I pick it up?'

Chris nodded.

'Rose!'

'Hi Iris, what's wrong?'

'Well…I know Jake told me it wasn't the right time to call you but…'

'It's alright Iris.'

'Well I wanted to know if you want me to bring you cookies or flowers on Sunday?'

Jemisha looked at Chris and smiled, 'Why not bring both. Chris could use some flowers right now.'

Iris sounded happy and agreed to it.

'Uhm Rose…I have been drawing and I made a drawing and I want to show it to Chris right now is that alright?'

'Let me ask him first.'

'Chris, Iris has drawn a picture and she wanted to show it to you, you want to see it?'

Chris looked up but was bit hesitant.

The psychologist nodded it was alright.

Jemisha turned on the camera of her phone and so did Iris.

She walked up to him and gave her phone.

Iris saw Chris had cried and had a painful expression on his face.

'Chris are you in a lot of pain?'

"Yeh…but I bet when you come to visit me, it wil all go away."

She then show the picture she had drawn, it was a little mouse sleeping under roses and Irises.

Chris smiled and knew what she wanted to tell him.

"Is that little mouse me?"

'Yeh and the roses are Rose, and the Irises is me. We wil help you and be there for you.'

'Do you like it?'

"Hmm, I like it a lot, thank you Iris."

'I'll bring Noah with me Sunday, because you look like you can use his help too.'

The psychologist saw Chris interaction with Iris over the phone and asked Jemisha.

"Who is Noah?"

'He is Iris therapy dog, I have two at home myself. But they are not here because before we came here I had to travel for business so…and I don't want Spike and Sheila to go through all that hassle.'

'Plus Spike and Sheila, are currently taking care of a friend of ours.'

Chris told Iris he would be looking forward to her visit on Sunday but he had to go and talk to a doctor right now.

Jemisha took the phone and she talked a little more and ended her call.

Just after she hang up, she got a call from Jack.

'Ah crap…I'm in trouble now…'

"What do you mean?" Chris asked her.

Jemisha showed the caller ID and Chris chuckled 'God speed Rose.'

She picked up the call.

'Hi Jack! How are you?'

Jack noticed by the way she greeted him the psychologist was around.

"Rose…why haven't you called for the past 2 session days?"

'Well…I didn't feel the need for it, I'm fine.'

"Sure Rose if you say so…but I don't believe you."

'Really, I'm fine. I'm in way less pain than Chris. Well I do get frustrated when I can't do things, but Chris thinks of alternatives for me.'

"And?"

'Alright…I do feel helpless sometimes with Chris, but that's only because he hides from me.'

'I don't know why he thinks I don't understand his current condition, I have been there so I understand it very well.'

'I try to keep a positive attitude and I do tell him, it's alright if he doesn't feel like doing anything. I mean it took me 6 weeks before I finally felt comfortable to get out of the house.'

'I understand now how frustrate and helpless he felt when I was in his current position.'

'But all I can do is ride it out.'

"You do tell him when you get frustrated right."

'I do…'

"But your hiding your frustration when he is actually the cause of your frustration."

'True…but he is already in so much pain, adding my complain about him to him isn't good for him, and since he is hiding from me, why should I show everything to him.'

'But we made some progress today, me and Chris, he showed me one of his monsters and it wasn't so bad.'

"What do you mean?"

'He was in pain and had trouble getting up and when I wanted to help him he lashed out. When I saw his angry monster I just introduced myself and everything was just fine after that.'

"How are you holding up with your anxieties?"

'Well…it's not good I guess, I feel more and more anxious these day, I try to coop with it but it's hard. And every time the psychologist comes by it's getting worse.'

'I know he is not the same as that psychopath, and I can't run away either because I promised Chris I would stay with him when he has his sessions, but I can't help feeling trapped, and be reminded of the psychopath.'

Chris heard about her anxieties and got up and walked over to her, but since her back was turned she didn't see him coming, and she almost jump through the ceiling when he hugged her from behind.

"Rose, why don't you leave the room when I have my sessions?"

'Why? I promised you, and we don't have secrets…'

"I know and I can record all my session so you can listen to them when I'm done."

'No!'

"Rose, look at you, you're on edge, and your anxieties are almost through the roof. You don't have Spike or Sheila with you."

"And I don't want you to get even more anxious than you already are, because that's not good for you either."

'But…'

"Chris is right Rose, I think you're forcing yourself too much."

"You need to give yourself room to heal, Chris can record the sessions when you're not around, and when you feel like you can handle being in the room with the psychologist, you can stay."

"I know very well what can happen when you feel cornered for too long, or when somebody pushes your buttons."

"Although you don't have a pistol on you right now, who is to say you won't pull a knife?"

"Give yourself some space to breath, Chris won't hold it against you if you're not there. He knows very well you need it right now."

'Alright…'

"Good girl, and when your all healed up drag your boyfriend out of the house and bring him somewhere."

Jemisha smiled 'I will.'

"When are you done with your treatment?"

'Two more weeks, and Chris has 8 weeks left.'

"Alright, let's talk once a week, since you said it yourself you're not in that much pain and you seem to handle it well."

'Alright, but I will call more often if feel I need it.'

"Deal, now take good care of yourself and the little mouse who is in a lot of pain."

'I will Jack, talk to you soon.'

She ended her call but heard a familiar whimpering sound.

'I think I'm starting to hear thing now.'

"What do you mean?"

'I thought I just heard Spike and Sheila whimpering.'

Chris now heard it too and he opened the door.

At the door was Loki, Spike, and Sheila.

Spike and Sheila were happy to see Jemisha and they pounced at her.

She was overjoyed by the sighed and hugged them.

"Why are you here?"

"Well I'm fully recovered and I thought Rose would be on the verge of breaking."

"Plus I came to see how you two are doing."

"Rose, why don't you go take a walk with Spike and Sheila, Loki will be with me till the end of my session."

She looked at him.

"Rose you need space to breath and you promised you would do that."

'You're right, but you better record it.'

"Don't worry Rose, I'll do that." Loki showed his phone.

Jemisha got up and went with Spike and Sheila to the lake and played with them.

Chris resumed his session and Loki was just sitting their quietly and recorded it.

When his session was over the psychologist looked outside. "Chris, while your girlfriend is a sweet and caring girl, she has her issues." 

"But I think you both have issues and as long as you two communicate you both will be each other's cure."

"But remember this, although I don't know the cause of her PTSD, I want you to know that it will stick with her throughout her life."

"I already know, but what I see is a beautiful girl, who is smart, strong and funny. No person is perfect, and I'm not perfect either."

The psychologist smiled and left the room.

"So how are you feeling? Because Rose doesn't seem to be bother by her treatment all that much."

"Well the pain is hellish that for sure, but I know this is only a fraction of what she had been through when she sped up her last treatment."

"I'm quit lucky I guess."

"Although she looked like she was ready to kill the physiologist last week, she is more warry of him now."

"Well she does respond to him when he ask her a question but her attitude is cold and annoyed."

"And when she think he is focusing on her, she will pull up her wall and push him back to me."

"Well it's not unusual for someone like her, and the psychologist said since she won't deny his presence or the help he gives me, she will slowly get used to him."

"But he does admire her positive energy and thought pattern. He advised me to lean on her more because she already knows the pain I go through."

"Does she know how you can be when you're in a lot of pain?"

"I told her, well I did lash out to her a moment ago, and she just smiled at me and said; Hello little monster, I'm Rose, nice to meet you."

Loki burst out in to a laugh "Well that's our Black Rose for you…Only she can see a positive in a negative sometimes."

Chris also started to laugh.

Jemisha saw the two of them laughing and she had a smile on her face 'Spike, Sheila are you sure Loki is alright?'

Spike barked.

'Are you sure?'

Spike and Sheila both started to bark.

'Alright, if you say so then it must be so.'

'You two did a good job.'