Chapter 1: Past life [I]: Sam

[Note: This is an auxiliary chapter, so reading this isn't necessary. I wrote about Sam's past life because it will help you understand Sam's perspective better.]

"I think you should at least learn reading since you're now in 9th grade," a young boy named Sam suggested. Upon hearing this, a teenager named Sol responded with disdain, "Huh! You're still in 11th grade and you're lecturing me?" Sam's face fell at Sol's comment, but he managed to force a self-deprecating smile.

Among them, another boy named Kaushal chimed in, saying, "Alright, let's leave this matter. Why not play some games?" Sam, upon hearing Kaushal's suggestion, realized that Kaushal was trying to change the subject. He replied, "Okay, you two go ahead and play. I'm going to read some manga." With that, Sam reclined on the bed and began reading his manga, while Kaushal and Sol started playing their games.

Yes, you heard it right, this is the story of Sam. The trio sat on the bed, each engrossed in their own activities. Sam immersed in a novel, while Kaushal and Sol became engrossed in playing games. It had become a repetitive routine for Sol to reprimand or even disdain Sam.

But you'd be surprised to learn about their relationship. Sam and Sol are siblings - blood-related brothers. Sam is the older brother, and despite this, Sol often reprimands or even disdains him, much to Sam's passive acceptance. Meanwhile, Kaushal is their cousin, the son of their mother's sister. He is younger than Sam but older than Sol.

As of today, Sam is 17 years old and currently studying in the 11th grade. Despite his young age, he possesses a deep understanding of the world, having witnessed the true face of society. He earnestly tried to convey to his younger brother the importance of being able to read, especially given his brother's 9th-grade status. However, his brother took offense to this advice and responded with reprimand and disdain.

To understand this situation better, it's crucial to delve into Sam's backstory.

Sam's memories take him back to a life spent predominantly in a hostel, starting from nursery school and continuing until the 10th grade, a span of around 5 to 14 years of age.

He recollects that he only had the opportunity to study in his hometown for a year or two, as circumstances led to his relocation to a village hostel at the tender age of 4 or 5 while his parents were in the city for earnings.

During this time when Sam was in his 5th class, his parents visited him a maximum of four or five times. When Sam reached the 4th grade, he mustered the courage to express to his parents his desire to discontinue living in the hostel and to continue his education elsewhere.

Upon hearing this, his parents tried to make him understand that he should study in the village for one or two more years before they would consider relocating him to another hostel. However, Sam remained resolute in his decision. Eventually, his parents had to concede when he was in the 5th class, and he was transferred to a hostel located in a more populous town.

He continued his education there until the 10th grade and successfully passed his matriculation exams with an impressive 91%. Throughout these years, from 1st to 10th grade, he barely saw his parents a handful of times. What's even more heartbreaking is that his father passed away when he was in the 6th grade, and Sam didn't have the opportunity to meet him one last time or attend his father's cremation.

Yes, you read it correctly. Despite being the eldest son, he couldn't be present at his father's cremation due to the considerable distance that separated them.

During that time, it was the most challenging period for his family, but strangely, Sam didn't feel as though his heart had withered away. You could say it had nothing to do with him that's how Sam felt. Sam could only guess that it stemmed from the fact that his parents had left him in a hostel for studying when he was just a few years old, without even contacting him.

He still remembered the first time he spoke to them on phone, which was in 3rd grade. Throughout the years he spent in 1st to 3rd grade, his parents never visited him or even talked with him through phone, and he couldn't fathom the reason. However, from the 3rd grade onwards, his parents began calling him every Sunday, the one day of the week he eagerly awaited.

But what his parents didn't know was that Sam had to endure a lot, including bullying and other challenges. However, he never complained or had the opportunity to confide in his parents, as he had to speak on the phone call with his parents before the hostel owner, whom Sam and every other little boy living in the hostel referred to as "teacher."

Likewise, until the 4th grade, he used to talk to his parents on phone before the "teacher" every weekend, so his heart had already become somewhat numb and strong enough to bear all of these hardships.

In the 4th grade, his parents visited him during the holidays, and that was the first time he went home. He finally opened up about everything and expressed his desire not to live in that hostel anymore. However, his parents delayed addressing the issue, allowing the summer holidays to pass.

One of the most peculiar aspects of Sam's life was his distant relationship with his parents. Unlike most children who naturally develop close bonds with their parents from a child age, Sam had spent most of his childhood living in a hostel. This separation had created a noticeable divide, preventing him from openly sharing his feelings with his parents.

Conversations with them were limited to formal inquiries even on phone or face to face like, "How are you?" and "I'm fine," followed by a quick disconnection of the call. As a result, the close emotional connection that most children have with their parents never fully formed for Sam. He often attributed these factors as the reason why he felt so little when his father passed away, as he hadn't even seen his father's face one last time. It seemed that Sam's heart had grown cold over the years.