chaper 19: What is this emotion in his eyes?
I don't know how long we stared at each other but I am sure it was for a while, there was something about the old man that I couldn't quite place my hand on. I had always gotten that feeling.
He suddenly started walking towards me like he did the last time but it looked like he was trying to make up his mind on whether or not to come any closer, I wanted to move back but it was like my legs were glued to where I was standing. I couldn't even look away from his eyes, why couldn't I look away? It was like I was held captive by his eyes. He walked closer but continued staring at him I noticed his eyes for the first time, He had the most beautiful blue eyes I had ever seen. I had looked him in the eye before but I had not looked at him long enough to see how beautiful they were. I tilted my head a little without taking my gaze off him, I almost gasped at the site, I wondered what his eyes would look like if I stared at them in the sunset and help but smile. They were so radiant, how could an old man's eyes be so beautiful? 'please don't come any closer, please don't.' I thought as he came even closer though I could still see the uncertainty in his strands, as he took them one at a time. Why does he always do this, if it was to scare me I was already scared. The anger that filled his eyes just a moment ago was now replaced with an emotion I had never seen. I couldn't understand what it was, I knew he didn't like me or anything ' So what is it? lust then? Hell no, if it was lust he would have had his way on me since the day I got here' My heart had started racing the moment he started walking towards me but right now it was like it would explode. I didn't know I had moved my hand to my chest and was holding it. My action suddenly brought him back from wherever his thoughts had taken him and for a moment that emotion I had never seen was there, turned his head away from me instantly and started walking to his room before I could even say a thing or have things figured out in my head. I watched him go and suddenly felt the urge to go talk to him, I wanted to just stop him and talk with him. I suddenly remembered I have never really had a serious conversation with the old. Why do we never talk? ' Well, cause we both avoid each other obviously' I thought.
' What the hell? I should be happy.' I turned around and went to my room. Some minutes later I heard a knock on my door 'What if it's the old man? Have I caused trouble for myself by staying out? "I should have been quiet when he was going to his room but no I had to say something" I murmured running a hand through my hair. He was staying away from me for a while now, I shouldn't have upset him. I should have let him go when he was quiet. The knock came again, I hesitated then gathered up the courage to ask who it was. " It's Nancy, ma'am." I sighed in relief after hearing her reply. I placed a hand on my chest which was still racing. I walked to the door and unlocked it, yeah I decided it was best to keep my door locked not that it can keep the old man out if he wanted to come in.
"Hello Ma'am" Nancy greeted as I opened the door.
" Hi Nancy, how are you doing?" I forgot to call Nancy about my hangout with Liam, I bet she had made dinner thinking I would have some. " Am okay ma'am, you had a good yeah?" She was smiling now and I motioned her to come in, she came in still standing with her hands folded in front of her. I sat down "Come on Nancy, sit down" I smiled at her and she sat beside me. "I did have a good day and am sorry I didn't call to tell you I wouldn't be home for dinner, I forgot." She was still looking at me with a smile. " It's alright ma, Mr kelvin informed me you would be late. I came to see if you need anything." She was looking at me like she was expecting an answer. "Am okay Nancy, I thought you already slept. Get some rest okay?" I looked at her and saw she was battling with sleep even though she would say she wasn't sleepy if I asked her, I smiled at her.
We said goodnight and she left my room, I took my shower and went straight to bed then remembered I had a topic I hadn't finished studying before leaving the library. I got up again and picked up my books from my bag and sat at the reading table, I tried reading but I kept thinking about the old man. For the reputation he has why does he never touch me? not that I wanted him to but I was curious. I was an overthinker and never let my mind rest till I find the answer to whatever was on my mind and what has been on my mind lately had been why he married me of all people, I understand my dad owed him but why did he decide to marry me was the only way to get my his money. I stood up and went to my bed and just when I closed my eyes my mind went to Liam ' Oh, this is bad he's probably so angry' I thought. How do I start explaining? 'What would I do if I found out Hads got married to a man old enough to be my dad and is leaving with him and my two best friends hid it from me?' I pondered about this for a while " Yeah, I'll be upset maybe too upset " I murmured. I carried my phone and contemplated calling him but I couldn't, I didn't know how to start explaining. I closed my eye and said a prayer and waited for sleep to come but sleep wasn't coming. I picked up my phone again and looked at Liam's number for a while, still, I couldn't call him. I was scared of how he would react, he was a friend I never want to lose. After staring at the number for the next 10 minutes, I called Hads instead. She picked up on the second ring.
" Hey baby girl," Hads said yawning.
" Hey Hads, sorry I woke you up." I apologised
" It's fine Lis, Are you okay? " She asked concerned.
" Not really, am worried about Liam. I know he would be angry with me If he finds out but I don't know how to explain things to him." I explained. " Don't worry too much okay? He will be fine. We'll find a way to explain things to him" She said. "Okay, I just feel restless. My whole life is just in a mess" I said as my voice broke.