Torn

SIA:

I looked on as Faust slumped unconscious in mine and Marrok's arms and I felt pure unbridled anger course through me.

Anger at myself.

But that would have to wait.

Summoning the last vestiges of my warforce, I gently took Faust from Marrok and flashed forward toward Sir Liam, who was strolling toward us with his hands behind his back as he looked at the fallen.

Stopping in front of him, I said, "He needs a warforc-"

"I know, girl," Sir Liam said, as he cut me off.

Opening my mouth again, I was about to speak when he continued, "He won't die as long as I'm around. But I'm curious to see how long can he survive after draining his warforce completely."

Closing my mouth, I looked at the man who was looking carefully at Faustus as threads of warforce played at his hands.

Looking at Faust and then at the fallen Maidens, I looked upward as my face scrunched up.

I was so confident that we were ready.

But each change caught me unawares, and I didn't make the best decisions.

Looking at Marana, I wondered why I never knew she was an iron ranked 2 star, just like me.

Glancing toward Ares, I wondered why he had picked her.

In fact, what was with the picking?

A sinking feeling in my stomach, I looked at Marrok, who smiled at me wanly before his eyes drooped and his head lowered.

The sinking feeling getting worse; I suddenly looked at Sir Liam, who looked back at me with a smile that didn't reach his eyes.

Urgently, I asked him, "I still have one choice left, right?"

Laughing out loudly, Sir Liam pitched his voice across the field as he asked, "Year 2. Would you tell this little girl here about the choices?"

The boy, Cahir Ironblade, grinned as he walked forward toward Marrok with the four other iron ranks following him.

Pointing to Marrok, who didn't raise his head, he said, "Our year… has suffered losses. To replace those losses, we get to pick 4 people from the fresh admissions." and as he spoke the last words, a fleeting expression of anger crossed his face before it resumed normalcy.

The sinking feeling growing stronger; I stared mutely as Cahir continued to say, "So I chose this one. Celine there chose that girl, Iole was it? Damon chose Celsus. As for Ares," here he paused with a thoughtful look before he said, "He chose Marana."

Desperately, I asked while trying to keep my voice steady, "What about my choice?"

Turning to face me, he smiled widely as he said, "You have your choice. You can… redeem… one of the four people we have chosen."

Looking at Marana, who looked at me quietly; Celsus, who looked at me calmly; Iole, who stood bemused; and Marrok, with head lowered… I felt my heart break.

They were all Maidens.

My Maidens.

How could I let them go?

Seeing the struggle pass over my face.. For the first time, emotion crossed over Ares, Celine, and Damon's face as they looked at me with pain in their eyes.

And suddenly I understood.

This had happened to them, too.

I just knew it had.

Because if I looked in a mirror, then the pain in their eyes would be in my eyes too.

Raising a trembling hand, I looked once again at Iole, Celsus, Marana, and Marrok… before my finger pointed at Marrok.

"I choose him," I said, as my eyes became wet at the corners.

Looking back at Marrok, Cahir sneered as he said, "Popular, aren't you?". Then, jerking his head at the other three who were staring at me sadly, he asked, "What about them? Abandoning them?"

Drawing in a rattling breath, I spat out, "They are Maidens. And we will get them back. You wait and you wash your neck… Cahir Ironblade."

Laughing, Cahir doubled over before he looked at Sir Liam and said, "Shall I tell her of the other rule?"

Eyes widening, I looked at Sir Liam, who looked at me impassively as threads of warforce danced their way to Faust as he lay there.

Speaking slowly, Sir Liam said, "You had two choices in the beginning. Because of your decision, one choice was lost. If you had won the battle, you would have gained another choice. But since you didn't…."

As I turned cold, Cahir finished Sir Liam's words as he said, "Since you didn't... we get to choose one more... along with one certain extra benefit that is allotted to us since we're seniors."

My heart hitting rock bottom, I looked at him as he pointed a raised finger at Faust and said, "For the battle victory choice, I choose this boy."

Then he pointed at Marrok and back to Faust as he asked tauntingly, "Now who will you choose, girl?"

Gritting my teeth, I looked up at the sky as a tear threatened to drop down to the ground.

Squeezing out the words, I asked, "What is the extra benefit?"

Laughing, Cahir said, "I'm not saying. No, no. Where's the fun in that?"

Lowering my eyes as my spirit deflated, I pointed once again at Marrok as I said, "I choose him."

Disbelievingly, Marrok looked up at me and I met his eyes as I gently nodded.

Pouting, Cahir looked at Faust and then back at Marrok before he shrugged as he said, "Well, I suppose I'll use the veto power benefit that we seniors have to say… Tough luck, you're not getting this dog back and oops, your choices are over!"

Stiffening, I clenched my fists as I breathed in and out rapidly, glowering at Cahir who raised his hands as he said, "Don't look at me like that… I'll feel scared, you know?"

"Cahir Ironblade. I will remember you." I spat out between clenched teeth as I stared daggers at the boy.

Suddenly turning serious for a brief moment, and then turning back to the smiling expression he had on, Cahir spoke as he turned his back to us and walked away. "One dog is more than enough and I don't want another dog that will bite me when it wakes up. So you can keep that boy. Faustus, was it?"

Pausing, he turned to look at me, before he turned back again and walked away, his voice drifting toward me as he softly said, "Remember me well, girl. Keep that anger and fuel yourself with it. And I'll put your Maidens down the same way that I did today."

The four other iron ranks stared at us for a brief moment before they too trudged behind Cahir, leaving Ares, Celine, and Damon, whose expressions wavered for a long moment as they stood.

Then, coming to a decision, they raised their hands and three groups formed behind each of them.

Whispering something to the students gathered behind them, they turned and walked toward me and Faust as the students behind them dispersed.

Silently, we stood regarding each other.

Until Faust coughed, and came back to himself, opening his eyes blearily.

And the tear that I had been holding back finally fell to the ground.