Three Years Later...

"Eh? You're going to transfer?" Ma'am Stella looked surprised. I mean, I would be surprised too if I were her.

"But why? Your grades are high, though," she looked worried.

"Ma'am, I failed the core subject of my course," I reasoned.

I'm a failure. I'm no genius. I'm only a useless girl who can't even be independent of my parents' financial assistance. I should just disappear from the face of the ear---

"No retention policy," Ma'am Stella grasped my shoulders with a forceful grip. I almost yelped in surprise with what she did.

"For three years, because of the pandemic, there's this no retention policy of the college. You still have a chance! You have high grades and only this one subject pulled down your records. But! I have my trust in you!" Ma'am Stella is really into this, huh?

"Out of all the students in the College, we only sponsored two students from your province, and you're one of the two. We chose you out of everyone else, Rae. You have potential, and I won't allow this mere setback to fully pull you off the pedestal," Ma'am Stella went on with her persuasion.

"Imagine this. If you transferred schools, how can you guarantee that you can pass the board exams after graduating their school?" she asked.

I thought for a while before remembering the news in the website of that school.

"There are ten passers from their school this year," I stated.

"How high are their passing rate? There are ten passers from their school, but how many students took the exam?" she asked with utmost precision. I cannot answer. Because I don't know the answer.

"Look here, Rae. If you graduate from our school, we can guarantee a lot of things. First off, there's a lot of scholarships and sponsors who can support you. Second, the school sends you guys off to a partnered Audit Company for training. It's certified and you'll learn a lot of things. And third, if you guys did a good job while at it, you might get offers in joining their workforce after graduating even without passing the board exam. It's a secured job," Ma'am Stella said.

Come to think of it, I think she's right!

"And, until you graduate and get a job, I'll personally support you! Come find me here in the office whenever you need my assistance," and I gained a backer.

This is a thigh I must hug! If a juicy piece of meat is being handed to me even if I didn't want it, I must accept! It's rude not to accept offerings and gifts!

"I won't transfer!"

Hello everyone, Rae Aurelia here, currently third year in college and moving on with life.

We never managed to graduate properly because of the pandemic. We did a virtual graduation and I didn't know my actual status. All I knew was that I'm a With High Honors awardee. Nicole did the speech for the ABM strand, and I'm fine with that. I'm not expecting to be at the top of the class anyway.

So, after senior, I continued studying via online learning in my chosen school. It wasn't fun at all. I can't concentrate properly and it's a first for me for studying online. I get uncomfortable during exams, fidgeting about my grades.

My first year in college went well. I passed my subjects, but the core subject is a bit of a problem. But I disregarded that because I still passed anyway. My nightmare started when I'm in my second year.

In my first semester, I flunked the core subject. My professor emailed me about an option of transferring to another course. It'll be a lesser damage for me. But! My current course is my dream course! I even took pride in managing to enter it in the first place! Among my class in senior, I'm the only ONE who managed to enter the course we were all working towards in that prestigious college. Flunking and dropping out is a huge blow to my pride.

So I wallowed in despair for months, hiding such a shameful thing from my parents.

I've thought of just ending everything once and for all, but I'm a coward, so the very thought of experiencing pain before I can end everything is scary. I jumped back before I can step into the road of no return. And I thanked my cowardice for that.

Because of that, I'm still alive and well.

I revealed everything to my mother one day and got my baggage off my shoulders. A lot of crying and apologizing happened, but I'm happier now that I'm not carrying a shameful secret. We've managed to talk to Ma'am Stella (she's my sponsor and backer now) and she persuaded me not to transfer out. I'll just continue my studies next semester and extend my stay in the College for at most two years after the expected four and a half year of college.

Ma'am Stella said that during the pandemic, even the upperclassmen had trouble studying. A lot of them are absent without leave until today, and that gave a lot of problem to the administration of the university. I think my neighbor who's an upperclassman too is AWOL (Absent without leave). With the return of normal classes, most of them are returning to schools and their daily schedules.

I realized that bottling up frustrations and your emotions isn't that good for the body. For the few months that I did, I turned gloomy, I lost my self confidence, my thriftiness turned for the worst, and I became an introvert. Even conversing with the customers of our family store is hard.

Right now, mom's whipping me up to shape for the next semester. I'll be correcting my daily schedule and improve my socialization skills with the neighbors. I have my books, so I'll study at home while waiting for the next semester. Everything will be fine, and I was given a new hope for the future.

Blessie is beautiful as always, and I'm currently stalking her Instagram photos. She usually posts her daily life, and it gave me the inspiration to also do my best.

I think I already moved on from her, but my heart still flutters whenever I saw her photos. We never met personally in the past three years nor have we talked in chat. It's as if what happened in senior was just a part of my imagination.

I might stay single for life though. Don't mistake that for me still having feelings for her.

I already moved on.