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Fiona Fleming Cozy Mysteries

I’m an international, multiple award-winning author with a passion for the voices in my head. As a singer, songwriter, independent filmmaker and improv teacher and performer, my life has always been about creating and sharing what I create with others. Now that my dream to write for a living is a reality, with over a hundred titles in happy publication and no end in sight, I live in beautiful Prince Edward Island, Canada, with my giant cats, pug overlord and overlady and my Gypsy Vanner gelding, Fynn. A Poo Poo Kind of Morning I tried not to look down the mouth of hell staring back at me from inside the glaringly pristine outer ceramic shell of the white throne, my throat catching, stomach doing half flips and a rather impressive rollover routine that would have gotten at least a 9.5 even from the Russian judges. Instead, I forced myself to smile and swallow and remind myself the elbow length yellow rubber gloves grasping the handle of the standard issue plunger were all that stood between me and Pooageddon. Suck it up, Fee. Big girl panties and adulting and all that. “At what point,” I waved the dripping plunger, wincing as droplets of yuck flew, “did I think owning a bed and breakfast was going to be glamorous and romantic?” Fiona Fleming is in so much trouble. Her recently inherited bed and breakfast might not actually be hers thanks to the underhanded misdealings of the local real estate bully. Despite her grandmother's last will and testament, Fee might me out of luck and on the street before she even gets settled. But when her new enemy floats belly up in her koi pond, she's the prime suspect in his murder! Can she uncover who the real killer is before the smoking hot new sheriff puts her behind bars instead of asking her out on a date? Dive into book one of the Fiona Fleming Cozy Mysteries, and don't miss the exciting sequels!

Patti Larsen · Realistic
Not enough ratings
492 Chs

Chapter 3: Obviously Some Mistake

My astonished and paralyzed state didn't last long and before I knew I was in motion I found myself jerking open the entry and hurtling down the front steps to the flagstone walk. Even so, the man's long stride had carried him a great distance and I only caught up as he was climbing into a giant monstrosity of a black SUV. I nabbed his arm, pulling him toward me, though honestly he was twice my size at least and had he wanted to just leave, there wasn't much I could do to stop him. But he did pause, still grinning, handing me a business card.

"When you're ready to hand over the keys," he said, "next day or two would be good for me, I'll be waiting for your call."

"There's obviously some mistake." My brain fired, spun, wobbled on its axis. This was nuts. My grandmother left Petunia's to me. Why would she sign it over to some stranger? I glanced down at the card in my hand. Pete Wilkins, Wilkins Construction, Inc. Did I even know him from growing up here? "You've obviously got the wrong place."

"If you're any longer than forty-eight hours," he said as if I hadn't even spoken, "I'll make sure the sheriff comes along when I take possession." He snickered at that. Like this was funny. "To give you encouragement to move out."

Move... "I'm not going anywhere." Heat washed over me that had nothing to do with the growing temperature of the day, the sun overhead, the July humidity. Now, I'm not saying I have a bad temper, but, well. I am a redhead. Scare me or push me or corner me? Ka-boom. I waved the envelope at him as he climbed into his truck with a grunt, slamming the door. "You'll be hearing from my lawyer." Because I had a lawyer. Yikes.

Pete Wilkins leaned out the open window, saluting me with two fingers. "Have a nice day, Miss Fleming," he said before laughing and keying a button, the whir of rising tinted glass cutting me off.

"Get back here right now!" Oh my god, did I really just stomp my foot on the sidewalk like a little kid having a tantrum? He backed into the street as if he owned it, squealing his tires when he drove off while I shook and shouted at his retreating license plate. "I want an explanation for this!"

"Fee?" Daisy's soft and worried tone didn't help at all. If anything, her timidity made things worse. I spun on her, spotted a pair of guests staring, Peggy Munroe observing from her front door. Confrontation was a spectator sport in Reading, was that it? "Is everything okay?"

She will never know how much inner strength and fortitude it took not to smack her with the damned envelope I clutched so tightly in my hand my fingers were tingling. She did have the good sense to back up a pace, though, and my guests, suitcases in hand, hurried inside as if I might blow at any moment. As for Peggy, she didn't comment, she and Cookie going inside as if disappointed there wouldn't be fireworks.

As for me, I inhaled. Exhaled. And dropped Pete Wilkins's card on the sidewalk before carefully and precisely shredding it under my sneaker.

"We have guests," I said abruptly to Daisy and stomped back inside.

Thursday was turnover heavy, one of my busiest days, and instead of being able to take my time and peruse the clearly mistaken document that remained hidden inside the large envelope, I instead shoved it into a drawer at the sideboard that housed the computer in the foyer and got back to work.

Cleaning and check-ins and a long, weary day later and I realized I hadn't had a chance to even change out of the stinky clothes I'd worn to clean the toilet in the Blue Suite. With a last sigh of disgust at myself, stomach growling from lack of dinner, I finally paused in the front hall near the desk and removed the envelope. Looked up around the beautifully decorated front entry with its delightful crystal light fixtures and vaulted ceiling, the bright, white wooden slats and soft blue walls. My grandmother's taste had been impeccable, to say the least. There was nothing old fashioned or creepy about Petunia's. In fact, I loved it, more than I'd care to admit, even after this short time as the mistress of this place.

If these papers were legit, how was I going to bear giving up this life I thought would rescue me from myself?

"It's going to be okay, Fee," Daisy said, coming to my side, voice still soft and apologetic. "Won't it?"

I had a very, very bad feeling it wasn't. But the initial burn of fury was gone, leaving behind the kind of sick knotting that usually led to me making terrible life choices. "Sure it will," I said. "Can you handle things here for a bit?"

Bless her, she didn't do a whole lot, really not suited to working for me on the physical, manual labor side. But I didn't have the heart to fire her-considering I hadn't officially hired her in the first place-when she'd bustled back into my life like an excited kid whose favorite toy had been found after a long absence. And she really was good with the guests. Like Petunia, they treated her as if her adorableness was endearing so I shrugged off her lack of focus and ability in the bed making and bathroom cleaning department and let her handle the desk.

"Of course," she gushed. "You can count on me." She saluted, cute little flowered sundress as flawless as when she'd arrived this morning, perfectly polished nails unchipped. And while leaving her in charge likely meant a disaster waiting to happen, I had to face this ridiculous prospect I might not really own Petunia's after all.

With the envelope clutched in my hand and the waddling pug on a leash at my side, I strode out of the front door and down the street at a smart clip. My temper pushed me faster and faster, only to hear the chuffing puffs of protest that spun me around. Petunia now strolled behind me-way behind me-her short legs plodding under her round body, tongue hanging at a comical angle, corkscrew tail wagging its jolly best as she tried to keep up. The harness around her chest sat askew, retractable leash at its maximum reach.

"You could have stayed home." Annoyance at her helped cut the edge of my worry as Petunia finally joined me and sat on her haunches, back legs tucked sideways under her as if she planned to stay a while. She grumbled a few pug things at me, ending in a soft growling bark that told me exactly what she thought of me leaving her behind.

"Fine," I said, spinning and marching on, though at a pace more suited to Petunia this time. "But don't you dare tell Mom you missed dinner. I know Betty gave you seconds."

The pug burped softly before farting with great enthusiasm.

Almost enough to make me smile.

I rounded the end of the block and past a short, white picket fence, the familiar sight of my father's pickup truck and Mom's cute little custom pink Volkswagen Beetle crowding their narrow driveway. At least they were both home. I was going to need the two of them on this, I had a feeling, even if just to commiserate on my loss if it came to that.

I wasn't expecting the sight of the big, white sheriff's truck parked across the street, nor of the tall, broad shouldered and white hatted uniform who strode out the front door of my parent's rancher with a tip of his brim, boots thudding on the patio stones as he sauntered down the walk as if he knew just how freaking delicious he looked 24/7.

Sheriff Crew Turner paused at the gate, grinning at Petunia who he bent to give a good scratch behind one ear before he squinted up at me, blue eyes narrowed against the sun setting behind the mountains. It gave him a rugged appearance, like he'd strode out of a cowboy movie though I knew for a fact he was from southern California and not somewhere as cliché as Wyoming or Texas.

"Miss Fleming." He'd yet to call me Fee, and while we'd only met once, in passing, a week ago when he took over as county sheriff from my dad, I figured first name basis was a good place to start.

"Just Fee," I said. "Sheriff."

He stood, frowning slightly, eyes catching the envelope, my obvious upset. Because I'd never been able to hide it when I was ready to lose my mind, uh-huh. The whole world knew when Fiona Fleming was pissed. "Problem?"

"Personal." I really should have tried harder with him, considering there weren't many manly options around here, but it had been a hell of a day. As much as I would have loved to flirt and maybe do something about that handsomeness that involved wine and dinner, not only was I in a terrible mood, surely I still stank, even after all the hours I'd put between me and the carriage house toilet incident.

Crew glanced back over his shoulder and I followed his gaze, to find my father, just as tall and wide through the shoulders, really a carbon copy of the new sheriff if three decades older, glaring at the two of us like having a conversation was against the law. Dad chose to retire, so it wasn't like he resented Crew for taking his job. Or maybe he did?

"Nice to see you again, Miss... Fee." Crew tipped his hat, black hair falling over his eyes before smiling down at the panting pug. "Madam Petunia." And then he walked away and I wished I didn't have this crap to deal with so I could find out if it was just the cut of his jeans that made his butt look so damned fine.

What? I was due some distraction, thank you.

With a heavy heart and a terrible feeling, I plodded to the door and looked up at my dad.

"I think I'm in trouble," I said. And handed him the unopened envelope.

***