Chapter Nine

Letting go is never an easy thing to do but sometimes, it's the right thing to do.

- Grace Chanbee

[Justin’s POV]

If Grams was not the radio type, I would have gotten a television set a long time ago. I did not have much, but here I was, after trying so hard to save up money, contemplating on buying a TV for Amber so she will not always sit idly doing nothing or on the other hand, whether to buy her an android phone which was quite hard to maintain as WiFi was hard to find where we lived.

Grams termed Amber as the perfect daughter-in-law because she claimed I had changed for the best ever since I fell badly in love with Amber.

When I asked her why she thought so, she said I hardly complained or grumbled these days and did every work while smiling and humming. Did I ever hum? I could beat my chest and counter that statement but then, love made you do stupid things, didn’t it? And by the way, humming wasn’t that bad in my opinion.

Buying a TV set or a very good Android was going to cost me nothing less than 70 dollars which was quite a great deal of amount for me, but I still didn’t mind it at all. Damn! I might as well give my whole life to Amber and it wouldn’t hurt.

“Bro! Bro!” I heard what was undeniably Aiden’s voice call.

“Dude!” I responded, looking up from my notepad and seeing it was in fact Aiden.

“I wanted to inform you about something, I saw your grandmother going out, so I knew she wasn’t gonna be around to cite me as a bad influence for her grandson,” Aiden said.

“Oh! No wonder you barged into the house like that without feeling a tinge of fear,” I told him.

“What the hell are you even doing?” Aiden asked, picking up the notepad from the table.

“I’m making a budget or what does it look like?” I responded in a sarcastic tone.

Aiden eyed the list with disgust then dumped it on the table, collapsing beside me on the couch.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“I should be asking you that. What do you want to use a television for? You don’t make that much money from your clothing business and we both know that,” He said.

I ran my hands through my hair and licked my dry lips, saying nothing.

“Uh-huh. I know that look. Tell me, who’s the lucky girl?” He asked.

I chuckled, trying to choose my words carefully.

“You never chuckle. OMG! You’ve fallen really hard,” Aiden commented.

“I think I have. You have already seen her so you should know who she is and trust me when I say that she’s worth it,” I said.

“Really? I’m absolutely happy for you. Tell me, who is she?” He asked.

“Who else? It’s Amber of course,” I responded.

Aiden’s face suddenly changed from the cheerful one I was used to as his jaw tightened and his whole countenance turned gloomy.

“What’s wrong? Why’s your face suddenly so moody?” I asked.

“The Amber you are talking about, is it the same one you told me about? The one that you found in the boot of your van? The same one who lives with you?” He asked.

“Yeah, it is the same one. Why are you suddenly like this? What’s going on?” I asked.

“Where is she right now?” Aiden asked.

“She’s in the bedroom having a nap,” I replied.

Aiden buried his head in his palms and let out a deep sigh.

“Aiden, dude, you’re scaring the hell out of me. Will you just freaking speak the hell up and stop beating about the bush? What is going on? Why are you acting in this weird manner?” I asked, raising my voice as I had lost my patience.

Aiden brought out his phone and was scrolling through it after unlocking it with his fingerprint.

“Aid…..”

He stopped me midway by raising his right hand, signaling for me to hold on and I kept mute knowing he was probably going to give me an answer soon.

“Come here, girly,” I told Sally, waving my hand towards her, signaling her to come into my arms as she had just lay looking bored.

Aiden looked up for a moment. “Wow! You now have a pet as well,” He noted and went back to whatever he was doing on his phone.

I grinned as I picked up Sally and put her in my arms, placing my fingers in her mouth and removing them whenever she tried to bite.

“Here,” Aiden said, interrupting what I saw as a game between Sally and myself.

I stared at the phone he was handing over to me for a while then collected it.

“This is a news article,” I muttered.

“Yeah. Read what it is about,” Aiden said.

I scrolled down and saw the most shocking thing ever. My whole world seemed to pause for a minute as my brain was dead to any form of reasoning or belief.

I assumed that what I had seen was a total lie and summoned the guts to stare at the phone again, seeing the same thing I had previously seen that kept on playing and replaying in my mind’s eye.

Absent-mindedly, the phone fell from my hands and my mouth let out a gasp as regrets, anger and an overwhelming feeling of betrayal purged through my mind, enveloping and hanging desperately unto my whole being.

"Remember I told you I came with information for you? Well, that's what I came to tell you. I’m sure you guys haven’t had sex yet so it’s not that much of a big deal. Before you get any closer to her, do yourself a huge favour by letting her go,” Aiden advised.

My head ached badly as my brain couldn’t process any more information than it already had, hence paying little or no heed to his advice.

“Justin….” Aiden called.

“Get out! I want to be alone,” I said.

“Justin, are you okay?” Aiden asked.

“Do I look okay to you? When you came with this kind of heartbreaking information, were you guessing I will be okay?” I thundered.

“Justin, I did this for you. Send her off to a police station and make her promise not to ever tell anyone about all these. If she really loves you, she’ll understand. Do not complicate this whole thing by implicating yourself in a matter that does not concern you,” He said.

“Please, Aiden, this isn’t your business. Let me be!” I yelled.

“This is my business. For crying out loud, you’re my best friend,” Aiden said.

“We only just started dating, how can you expect me to let her go just like that?” I asked, blinking back tears.

“You are fierce, Justin. The Justin I know isn’t a weakling. Do not go down the same path as your late father, we all know the troubles that come with Amber and her likes,” Aiden said.

I shook my head. “She’s nothing like them.”

He scoffed. “That’s because she doesn’t know who she is. You didn’t know her when she had loads of money, I’m sure you’ll have hated her and won’t have enjoyed even being in the same room with her,’ Aiden countered.

I sighed. “So what am I supposed to do now?” I asked.

“Do the right thing, don’t be like your father,” Aiden said.

I heaved another deep sigh. “Fine then, thank you for informing me about all these. Even though it freaking hurts a lot, I know you always have my best interests at heart,” I said,

“You would have done the same for me. When I go the wrong way, you always turn me back around,” Aiden said.

I threw a faint smile in his direction without saying a word.

He patted me on the back as he picked up his phone from the floor and stood up.

“Are you leaving?” I asked.

“Yeah. There’s this old widow who needs me to service her engine, she hates lateness,” He said, cutting me an eye.

I gave him a knowing smile. “Okay then, I really hope she pays you well for the service.”

He grinned and began to walk out then stopped at the doorway.

Without turning around, he said, “Do what you have to do. She’s not the only girl around, there are many fishes in the sea.” He then walked out of the house.

“Yeah. There are many girls around, but there is only one Amber,” I muttered to myself.

I kept Sally on the couch after which I stood up and went to the bedroom then sat on the bed beside Amber, watching how she slept so profoundly like a newborn baby.

Why did I have to fall in love so deeply only for my feelings to get so trampled upon without so much as a consolation price? My heart was bleeding so much it could stop beating as there was no remedy for the pain and hurt I felt so strongly, so very much intense.

Hot tears slid down my eyes, blurring my vision.

My whole body and soul yearned for her but as usual, fate was too cruel to even give a damn about my feelings. I knew I had just clocked 18 but I loved Amber and no, it wasn’t infatuation. It was freaking real, goddammit!

Why did she have to come from such an awful family? Why had life taken away my parents at such an early age? Why was my sister in an abusive marriage? Why was my grandmother not experiencing the happy life she deserved? Why couldn’t I have enough to get a law degree? And now, I had been denied of something so trivial as love.

Why? Why?? Why??? Why the hell was life freaking so unfair?

“Are you crying?” I heard Amber’s soft tone ask.

I wiped my tears with the back of my palms and looked at her sitting up and staring up at me with so much worry in her eyes.

I cleared my throat. “When did you wake up?” I asked, my voice sounding hoarse due to the tears I had been shedding.

“Not too long ago,” She responded.

“I’m sorry if I disturbed your sleep,” I apologised.

She smiled. “You didn’t, it’s fine to cry,” She said.

I nodded my head without saying a word then she did something that surprised me.

She took me in her arms, making my head rest on her bosoms.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?” I asked, trying hard not to laugh.

“I’m petting you, numbskull,” She said.

I was about to laugh when I remembered Aiden’s words which pierced my very soul. He was right. If I didn’t stop what was going on between Amber and I now, it will be hard for me to stop it later on, thereby causing me to implicate myself in a crime I didn't commit in the nearest future.

I quickly disentangled myself from her embrace which lit up a look of surprise on her face.

‘What is it?” She asked.

“We have to stop this, Amber,” I said.

She rolled her eyes, apparently not getting the information I was trying to pass across. “Stop what?” She asked.

“Stop being in a relationship,” I said.

She started laughing, much to my surprise. “You’re joking, right?” She asked.

I honestly wished I could laugh heartily along with her and tell her I was only pulling her legs but inasmuch as my heart wanted to do that so badly, my head was the path I chose to follow.

She stopped laughing as she saw I remained unflinching, not laughing and in every way being honest about breaking up with her.

“Why? Did I do something wrong?” She asked.

I shook my head. “That’s how everything was preordained to happen, I’m very sorry, Amber,” I said.

She scoffed. “Are you really sorry? Well, I don’t need you to feel sorry for me, because this isn’t over yet,” She said.

“Please, be reasonable,” I pleaded.

“You’re the one who isn’t making sense here. One minute, you’re telling me you love me, and the next, you’re breaking up with me. Who does that?” Amber yelled.

“I understand you, babe, but I have a good reason behind ending this sham of a relationship we both knew was not going to work out,” I said.

She climbed out of the bed and walked to the windowsill, staring at what was going on outside.

“You have lost every right to call me babe and I never knew you had doubts about our relationship because I trusted you and believed we were going to work out just fine. You say you have reasons? Then for once, Justin, don’t be a coward, tell me the reason behind this sudden change,” She said.

Her voice was breaking but she tried to finish her sentence even though she didn’t look me in the eye but continued to stare out the window.

I stood as well and stayed right behind her, hearing her sob gently.

“Did… did you perhaps….” She paused then continued, “Did you find out I actually come from a rich family?” She finally managed to ask.

I swallowed hard. “Yeah.”

“Is that why you’re breaking up with me?”

“No.”

“Then why? I deserve to know, don’t I?” She asked.

I heaved a deep sigh and thought it wise to let the cat out of the bag, because in all sincerity, she deserved to know.

“My friend that I’ve always spoken to you about, Aiden, he came with big information for me today while you were asleep. Your family has published that you are missing and they’ll give anyone who finds you a huge amount of money,” I said.

“It’s a relief to know I have a family, but how does that relate to the fact that you want to break up with me when our relationship just clocked a week old today?” She asked, still not facing me.

“There were pictures of you and your family, turns out you’re an only child,” I said.

“Justin, will you just go straight to the point?”

I sighed. “Fine then. If you must know, the person who sent my dad to jail and caused my parents’ untimely death is Gilbert Sanders, your father,” I finally disclosed.

She spun around with her mouth opened agape.

I snickered bitterly. “You know I dislike wealthy people and it’s just so freaking cruel and unfair that I’m so much in love with the daughter of the very person who made me hate rich people so much,” I said as tears flowed freely from my eyes irrespective of how much I tried to control it.

Amber swallowed hard as she watched me cry, her hands quivering as she heard me say those words.

“Why are you acting this way? You made me promise that nothing will ever change between us,” Amber said.

“And how was I to know that something like this was going to happen?” I growled, causing her to move backwards.

I raked my hands through my hair. “I’m sorry for raising my voice at you,” I apologized.

She then moved forward and wrapped her arms around my navel area, hugging me so tightly.

“Stop it, Amber. What are you trying to do? Don’t you get it? This was bound to happen, we can never be together,” I said, trying to push her away.

“I love you and I’m never letting you go,” She said, adamantly.

“Am……”

“I am so sorry about what happened to your parents and I don’t even wanna know the monster that claims he’s my father,” She said.

“There’s a price, Amber. I’m sure the townspeople have already seen you with me and your father will be here in no time from now to come get you and I’m scared of what he may do to me,” I said.

“Why? You didn’t do anything wrong,” She said.

I hugged her back and stroked her hair. “I love you so much, Amber and I know you may not understand how the world works but you must know this.”

“Know what?” She asked.

“This is where we say goodbye,” I said.

“I’m not going anywhere,” She objected.

“If you ever felt love for me, please, let me go,” I said.

I pushed her out of my arms gently and I saw her face wet with tears and her eyes really red from all the crying.

“Tomorrow, I’ll drive you to the local police station and I'll go back home. You must go inside and say you were saved by someone, you lost your memory and you don’t want to disclose your good Samaritan’s name…..”

“No, Justin, no!!”

“I'm sure the cops already know your face since the news seems to be circulating fast. Your parents won’t even care about anything else as long as they have you with them. You’re their only child and they so much adore you, Amber……”

“Don’t send me away, I’m begging you, please…..”

“You will be better off with your parents who can provide you with all the good things of life ……”

“And who said I want those things? I want you alone,” Amber said.

I held her shoulders as we stared painfully at each other as bitter tears continued to ooze in torrents from our eyes.

“This isn’t easy for me either, Amber. I have never felt so much in love in my entire life for anyone, but I have to let you go. Promise me you will do exactly what I’ve instructed you to do by tomorrow,” I said.

She didn’t say a word and just kept on crying so hard.

“If you love me, Amber, please, do this for me, will you?”

She finally gave in by nodding her head.

“Thank you. Please, pack your stuff in preparation for tomorrow," I said and let go of her shoulders then turned my back on her.

I knew she still had a few things to say but I felt like I was going to melt like crazy and be unable to control myself if I stayed back and heard her say one more word.

I stepped out of the bedroom with weak steps and met Grams standing, just right outside, holding a leather bag.

She had teary eyes and from her sad countenance, it was apparent that she had overheard the discourse I had had with Amber.

She stretched out her arms looking at me with so much pity.

I ran to her and slipped into her embrace as she patted me on the back, being a very tall woman who stood way too straight for her age.

My sobs were muffled. “I really love her, Grams, I really do,” I said.

“Ssshh! It’s fine, I know,’ She said, still patting my back.

I let Grams see my weakest moment for the first time just because of a girl but not just any girl, it was Amber Sanders, the daughter of the same man that had made me an orphan so early in life, and the realisation of that kept on tugging at my heart so painfully and it was even worse that after finding out who she really was, the only person my heart beat for was still her alone.

And I didn’t think that my feelings were ever going to change even though fate had made it clear that we weren’t destined for each other