Chapter 17: Indecision

Itadori didn't know what to say, much less what to think, he just looked at his hands covered in blood.

Something he was forced to do, the boy was in a catatonic state. - "What did you make me do..." - Itadori said.

"I'm sorry, Itadori. I had no choice..." - Irisviel said with her head down.

"Kiritsugu.... Do you really want to save humanity?!" - Itadori said extremely irritated.

"I didn't imagine my master would commit such an act... You are a demon!" - Said Saber irritated.

"I understood your nature, Kiritsugu. I was an idiot thinking our goals were the same... But I was completely deceived. Our paths and ideals are completely different. Until this moment, I have placed my faith in you both... And so , I didn't doubt your nature. NOW YOU WANT ME TO BELIEVE THAT A MAN LIKE YOU WANTS TO USE THE HOLY GRAIL TO SAVE THE WORLD?!" - Itadori shouted in anger.

"What will you do? Kill me? Just like you did with everyone else you killed in your life?" - said Kiritsugu to Itadori.

Itadori's anger grew. - "WHAT?! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!" - Itadori said angrily.

Kiritsugu lit a cigarette. - "Heroic Spirits are generally known not only for their deeds, but most of the time, because of their killing. And you are no different, Iri told me in detail about your story, since she dreamed about it." - said Kiritsugu without even looking into Itadori's enraged eyes.

Itadori looked at Irisviel who also looked away. "That's why you looked down on us before the attack in the forest... You see us that way. It turns out you're no different from us either!" - Itadori said, feeling betrayed.

"Answer me, Kiritsugu. What do you really want the Holy Grail for? Even if it's my sword or Yuji's raw that wins the Cup... If that means I have to give it to you...!" - Saber said after being interrupted by Irisviel.

"Answer, Kiritsugu. This time, you must give them both an explanation." - said Irisviel.

"If you only kill the Master, his Servant might try to make a contract with another Master. That's why I eliminated both the Master and the Servant simultaneously." - said Kiritsugu to Irisviel.

"Come on, Kiritsugu. Answer to Saber, not me." - Irisviel said, somewhat irritated.

"No... Honor, loyalty, glory... There's no point talking to assassins who pride themselves on such things." Said Kiritsugu.

"You speak as if I'm proud of this..." - Itadori said.

"You dare insult my honor in front of me, you demon?!" - Said Saber irritated.

"You cannot save the world. They say that certain forms of fighting are good and others are evil... Acting as if there is some nobility on the battlefield. Such illusions, perpetuated by heroes throughout human history, have led to countless young to bloody deaths, all for the sake of this bravery and glory" - said Kiritsugu.

Itadori remembered what happened in Shibuya and Shinjuku. His body is heavy.

"They are not illusions! Even taking a life, like such human acts, must possess laws and ideas! Otherwise, every war would only bring Hell to this world!" It said Saber.

Kiritsugu turned to talk to the golden-haired woman. "And there you go... You heard her, Iri. Our Heroic Spirit here thinks the battlefield is something better than hell... What a bad joke. It's hell itself. There is no hope on the field of battle. There is nothing but indescribable despair. Only a crime we call victory, paid for by the suffering of the defeated." - said Kiritsugu.

Itadori remembered much of the Shinjuku battlefield against Sukuna. What Kiritsugu said wasn't true, everyone fought for the hope of a world without curses, that's why they fought. They fought for everyone who would live.

"True human nature has not advanced a single step since the Stone Age." - said Kiritsugu.

"It's not true... You know it's not the truth, Kiritsugu! I'm not someone with glory, much less an honor not to tarnish. My job was to protect people from curses, I regret several bad decisions I made in my life, but I continue to fight and certainly in the afterlife, I will pay for all my sins that I committed. I'm sure you think so too..." - Itadori said.

"So your hatred for Heroic Spirits is the reason you force them both to endure such humiliation?" - said Irisviel.

"Of course not, I'm just saying that justice will not bring peace to humanity." - said Kiritsugu.

There is a lie in this sentence, Itadori felt it. - "If you act that way out of hatred of evil, this fury will only make a new conflict be born ... Kiritsugu, I have no idea what you did to stay that way. But your anger and anguish are one day that one day They swore justice. Like me, you believed you could be a hero and save the world, something I stopped believing for a long time ... I'm wrong?! - said Itadori.

Kiritsugu looked at Itadori very angry and said. - "I'll end this hate cycle." - said the man with black hair leaving.

Itadori went to Irisviel. - "Iri, are you okay?" - said Itadori.

"Kiritsugu has gone away?" - Irisviel said before almost falling to the floor.

"Iri!" - Itadori said holding Irisviel in his arms. - "Iri, wake up!"

After a long time...

Itadori and Saber they take Irisviel to their base. The pink -haired boy put Irisviel where they made the first magical circuit.

Irisviel wakes up inside a blue magical circuit. - "Itadori, Saber ..." - said Irisviel trying to speak.

"It's getting worse ..." - said worried.

"Irisviel, how are you feeling?" - Saber extending her hand to the girl with white hair like snow.

Irisviel tried to get up. - "It looks like I caused you a lot of worry, I'm sorry." - Say Irisviel squeezing the hand of Saber.

"It's okay. While you're really fine, we don't have to ask for anything else. But ..." - Saber said after feeling a strange presence.

"Who is it?" - Itadori said preparing.

"This presence is from Maya-san." said Irisviel.

Maya knocks on the door to call them.

Some minutes later...

"A tohsaka message?" said Irisviel.

"Yes. Tohsaka Tokiomi is asking for an alliance." - Completed Maya.

'That tohsaka ... the same man who burned the Lord killed...' "Itadori thought.

"An alliance? Now?" - he said know.

"Tohsaka must be concerned about how to deal with Rider and Berserker. We look like the team more willing to form an alliance, so he invited us to an encounter. In other words, he thinks we are the weaker when compared to others." said Irisviel.

"Alliance? The way this guy is, he must stick to us in the back anytime," said Itadori after remembering what he did to his daughter.

"Tohsaka said he wants to meet us is night at Fuyuki church. Tohsaka Tokiomi has made great preparations for this chalice war since the early stages. It is also likely that he is controlling Assassin master, Kotomine Kirei, of the shadows." Said Maya.

"So he tried to kill us before, and now want our help? How ironic ..." - said Itadori.

"If Tohsaka really has some influence on Kotomine Kirei, then we can't ignore this offer." - Maya said.

"Really ..." - said Irisviel.

"Kotomine Kirei..." Said Saber.

"Remember his name, you both. If there is someone who can defeat Kiritsugu and win the war of the sacred chalice, it's Kotomine Kirei." - Irisviel said getting up.

'Kotomine Kirei is the damn attack in the forest ... I'll remember that name.' - thought itadori.

"Let's accept his invitation." said Irisviel.

Hours later

At dusk, the trio goes to Fuyuki's church to meet Lord Tohsaka.

When they get there, they find Tohsaka Tokiomi, Kotomine Kirei and Gilgamesh waiting for the trio who had just opened the door.

"First, please let me thank you for coming on my order. Let me introduce you." - said Tohsaka.

'We already know the figures here...' - thought Itadori.

This is Kotomine Kirei, my student. Although we were once competitors for the Cup, that is now in the past." - said Tohsaka.

"We know him very well... He tried to kill my Master. After that I killed his Servant." - Itadori said with a frown on his face.

Tohsaka seemed to want to ignore that answer. - "The Chalice war is moving towards its conclusion. The remaining teams are, as anticipated, those of the Masters of the Three Founding Families, along with an outsider. Now, how would you assess the current situation?" - Tohsaka said to Irisviel.

"It's nothing we need to worry about. Since we control Saber and Itadori, one of the strongest Servants. We don't need to wait for an opportunity to attack. We will simply continue to win each battle." - Irisviel said confidently.

'Iri is good with words.' - thought Itadori.

"I understand. In my opinion, it is a shame that the Matous chose a wrong strategy. They forced a Servant that absorbs a lot on a weak Master, accelerating his own destruction. The Rider has a chance of being victorious. The Cup cannot fall into the hands of a stranger. We must both agree on that." - said Tohsaka.

'They want to focus on Rider? I understand his desperation, but for me, the most dangerous people here are you...' - Itadori thought.

"Any alliance is out of the question. But if you wish to discuss the order in which we will deal with our enemies, we can come to an agreement." - said Irisviel.

"Explain to me." - Tohsaka said curiously.

After a long conversation...

"Lastly, you will remove the Kotomine Kirei from the Holy Grail War." - said Irisviel.

This answer surprises Lord Tohsaka. - "Remove Kirei?"

"I will not ask you to kill him. But by the end of this war, I insist that he leave Fuyuki... No, Japan. Before tomorrow morning." - said Irisviel.

"Could you explain to me why that is?" - said Tohsaka.

"As Itadori had said before, there are several frictions between the Einzbern and the executor. If the Tohsaka continue to accept you, we will not be able to trust you at all." - said Irisviel.

After this conversation, supposedly, the deal had been made. And the trio left.

Saber was testing his new motorcycle. - "So, did you like Kiritsugu's gift?" - said Irisviel.

"Argh, NO WAY!... Kiritsugu didn't give me anything, he must be having a tantrum with me..." - said Itadori, clearly jealous.

"It's more like a horse than a car. It seems to suit me more. I should go ahead and make sure the route is safe. Climb up, Itadori." - Saber said, inviting Itadori to get on the motorcycle

"S-Serious?!" - Itadori said, blushing without realizing it.

Saber just nodded. The boy got on Saber's motorbike and they both left for the base.

Itadori was still quite thoughtful about what happened. - "Saber... Have you ever considered yourself a murderer?" - Itadori said being sincere.

"Yuji... When you become a king, even if you don't want to, people will call you a monster, a murderer, even a devil." - said Saber.

"It seems like you've gotten used to it, haven't you?" - Itadori said thoughtfully.

"It's been a long time... Have they ever called you a murderer, Yuji?" - Saber said while driving.

"Already... In a way, I consider myself a..."-Itadori said looking at his hand.

"You know something, Yuji. Ideals are part of us." - said Saber.

"Like this? I didn't understand.." - Itadori said confused.

"Our ideals are essential in shaping who we are. They give us purpose and our reason for being human." - said Saber.

Itadori seemed a little confused, as he couldn't forget what he did in Shibuya. - "I don't know..."

"What I'm trying to say is that because of the ideals you preach so much, I didn't consider you a murderer. And if you committed any bad act, that's inherent to us. There is no Heroic Spirit free from sins committed in life. That's why, Yuji... I don't consider you a murderer." - Saber said confidently.

Itadori didn't know what to say, he was still too thoughtful after what happened earlier.

"Arturia, could you stop here? I want to be alone for a while..." - Itadori said.

"Okay.." - Saber stopped near a square. Itadori gets off the bike and says goodbye to her.

"I won't be long, I just want to clear my head." - Itadori said.

"Don't you want some company, we have to be more careful now." - said Saber.

"Don't worry, I can manage." - Itadori said smiling at Saber.

"Okay..." - Saber says goodbye to Itadori and leaves.

'Hm... I can't trust Kiritsugu anymore... His ideals are completely distorted, I don't like to think about that possibility, but at some point, I'll have to turn against him. And if I do that.... I'll probably have to fight Arturia... I don't even like thinking about that possibility.' - thought Itadori.

Someone approached the boy. A hooded man, the same man who was saved by Itadori. Matou Kariya said:

  "It's Itadori Yuji, isn't it?"

End of chapter 17