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Fate/False Order

Accidentally killing yourself is a bummer, dying due to not reading the terms of service is embarrassing, and selling your afterlife is depressing. Now, let's follow Alistair, who, in his great wisdom performed the former while drunk, on his great quest of cleaning the Holy Grail of its corruption. And if that wasn’t hard enough, he needs to clean it during the 4th Holy Grail war, you know, the one with the worlds most feared assassin as a master, a psychopathic murder master and servant duo, a priest who goes on to hide kids in his basement, two of the knights of the round and fucking Gilgamesh in the mix. Safe to say, he’ll be acquiring premium life insurance, before stepping foot into Fuyuki. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Update schedule is three chapters a week, on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

Leylin_Blackwood · Anime & Comics
Not enough ratings
50 Chs

Vol. 1. Chapter 11 The Barthomeloi.

Gently, I slid my new spear into a large silver tube-shaped container with a sling, before screwing on the cork.

The container was naturally a Mystic Code, meant for the sole purpose of keeping the mysteries that the spear continuously spewed out contained.

Of course, it had the side benefit of making the spear go incognito, allowing me to actually bring it with me to other places, specifically for our little hunt we're starting today.

Throwing the sling over my shoulder, I let out an annoyed huff.

The Mystic Code's shape was... unfortunate to say the least, as it was almost as long as me, at five foot ten, along with being 16-ish inches wide, making it incredibly uncomfortable to have on my back and had the side benefit of making me look extremely stupid.

But apparently, Altrouge said it was important to keep it close to me, as the spear seemed to subtly drain some of my mana from my core, and in exchange, the connection between us was strengthening, albeit at a very slow pace.

Opening the door to my room, I picked up the duffle bag containing my clothes and some useful mystic codes.

Walking out of my room while readjusting the Mystic Code, I walked into the entrance hall, where I was met with all of the house's occupants… which was very odd by itself.

The three, and Cath in Altrouge's arms, had a safe distance of 3 meters between the humans and Ancestors.

Raising a brow, I gave them a curious look. "Not that I'm unhappy with the send-off, but what are you doing here?" I said while looking at Altrouge, making her give a sly smile.

"Oh, I am leaving soon as well," she said while buffing her nails on her dress, before blowing on them.

"Got places to be, blood to drink, catalysts to find," she said the last part while raising her brows subtly.

"You know, the usual." She said airily, making me send her a grateful nod.

If she had found a trail for a useful catalyst for the Grail War, then I can only be grateful. I'll ask her later whose catalyst it'll belong to.

Before I could thank her or tell her to have a nice trip, her face gained that teasing look, which spelled trouble for me.

"But I'm here to make sure you have enough warm clothing for the north, wouldn't want you to catch Ligma." She said the last part with concern.

The fuck is she playing at? I taught her that, I wouldn't fall for such a obvious trap.

"What's Ligma?" Mother said with confusion.

Fuck.

Both Altrouge's and my heads slowly turned to look at my mother.

"Ligma balls," she said in a triumphant tone to Mom, making my brow twitch.

Why did I introduce her to memes?

Mother gave a confused look before slowly realizing what Altrouge had said.

"How crude," she said in return, only for Altrouge to shake her head in disapproval.

"Don't be such a mind-goblin," she rebuked, causing Mother's face to contort in confusion.

"No, don't! It's a tra—" "Mind-goblin?"

A triumphant smirk adorned Altrouge's face.

"Mind goblin these NUTS!" She cackled aloud like a witch, making both Mother and me grimace.

She seemed to use her free arm to wipe away a lone tear. "Oh, I can't wait to use these on Ortenrosse! Old bastard will pop a vessel." She said before slowly making her way towards the door.

Opening the door, she shot me a sly look. "Thanks for the ideas, Alistair. Now toodles!" She said before slamming the door behind her.

Her words made the two others in the room give me dirty looks.

Shit, why did she have to tell them that I taught her those things!

Best to divert the conversation.

"Soooo, when are we leaving? Can't leave the Barthomeloi's waiting, can we?" I said in a neutral tone, as if nothing had just happened.

The two shot me looks that made it perfectly clear what I was doing, but they seemed to let the topic go.

"Yes…" Mother said, before jerking her head in the direction of the door. "I have something to show you as well, a surprise if you will."

Raising a brow, I walked to the door and opened it, revealing an empty driveway. Holding open the door, I turned my head around to look at my mother.

"Wow, an empty driveway, now that is surpris—"

"I didn't say it was here." She cut me off with an annoyed tone.

She bent down to pick up her own duffle bag and walked past me. "Follow along."

Clicking my tongue, I glanced at Amelia and raised a brow. "You coming?" I asked, making her shake her head.

"No, I'm being paid overtime to do your mother's work, so I'll happily stay." She explained.

Shrugging, I stepped out and followed Mother.

The two of us walked in silence to the 'garage,' aka the car house.

The surprise seemed to be a car, or maybe a bike? I have been 'learning' to drive with Amelia, and I was 'a natural' according to her, so maybe I'll get one of the fancier cars.

Mother stepped up to the garage door and flicked the open button.

As the door slowly rolled open, I dropped my bag as I recognized the car on the other side.

Rushing past Mom, I gently slid my hand over the bonnet of this absolute beast.

Six feet tall, 15 feet long, 7 feet wide, and 2.2 tons of pure freedom, and the future beast of the soon-to-be war on terror, the High Mobility Multipurpose Wheeled Vehicle, or Humvee for short.

Turning to look at Mom, I shot her an eager look. "How did you get this?!"

According to what I knew, the Humvee was only made like six years ago, and only in the military camps of the States. So this should be the property of the American Military.

And I'll assume that she knew that I liked the car, thanks to me having pestered her about buying one for the last two years, so I'll just be happy that my spoiled tendencies worked.

Mother shot me a smug look before dangling a car key. "Let's just say I know a guy and leave it at that," she said before throwing me the keys.

Catching them, I gave an eager smile.

"Hop on in, you'll be driving us to the airport, and then to the hideout." She explained, making me frown.

"We're bringing this with us?" I said with surprise.

Mother sent me a confident smile in response.

"Of course."

~~Fate/False Order~~

"Opening the hatch!" came the pilot's voice over the speakers, followed by blaring lights, and the cargo hatch of the plane slowly lowered.

As the hatch fully opened, I turned on the engine and slowly drove out of the military cargo plane.

Funnily enough, this was the exact same airport I had been dropped off at during Cold Response in 2022, so it was a bit nostalgic.

The outside looked just as you'd expect from somewhere so far up north, with a thin layer of snow covering just about everything.

"Drive over there," Mom said, pointing at one of the hangars at the furthest end of the airport.

Smoothly, I turned the wheel, shifted gear, and sped towards it.

As we approached, the hangar door started to slowly open, allowing me to drive us through the gap and into the hangar.

Inside was one of those fancy small private planes, parked in the middle of the room, along with a few figures standing by the plane.

Making an educated guess, I drove up to them before stopping the car.

Turning off the ignition, I pocketed the key before stepping out.

There were four people standing by the plane. The two in the back seemed to be butlers, the other two were more interesting.

The most striking one was a tall, imposing man with brown hawk-like eyes and brown hair spotted with gray streaks.

Beside him stood a young lady around my age with brown hair tied in a ponytail and similar hawk-like eyes in a yellow hue.

The two were clothed in… I'm not quite sure how to describe it, they kinda looked like they just stepped out of one of those aristocratic TV series, during one of their sport hunting scenes.

Aka, what the fuck are they wearing.

Maybe I shouldn't judge, as their family has been known for killing Apostles for literal millennia, but bro, there must have been a more combat-effective design they could have gone with.

Maybe it was tradition? A stupid one if so, but tradition has never been known for making sense.

Mother walked over to the tall man and extended her hand, which was met halfway.

"Good to see you, Rosalind," the man said, making Mother give a pleased smile.

"And good to see you as well, Barthomeloi. I hope that the wait wasn't too long, the weather suddenly turned on us," she said, making the taller man give a low chuckle as the two let go of each other's hands.

As they spoke, I decided to make my way over and positioned myself next to Mother.

I still found it weird for the lord of the Barthomeloi family to dislike being referred to by their first name, once they have claimed the title.

Feels hella weird, but I'll try not to voice out my thoughts, worst comes to worst, I'll be used as bait if I'm too annoying.

"No worries, we only arrived a few minutes before you," he said before gesturing towards what I assumed to be his daughter.

"Now, Lorelei, introduce yourself." At his words, the now identified Lorelei took a step forward.

"A pleasure to make your acquaintance, Lady Pendragon, heir Pendragon. I am Lorelei Barthomeloi, heir presumptive to the family name. It's a pleasure to finally meet you." She presented herself in a strict tone, not unlike a drill sergeant, before giving a shallow bow and taking a step back.

God, if she wasn't formal. Like, I'm fairly sure she didn't need to call me heir Pendragon, nor refer to herself as heir presumptive, given the good rapport between our parents. But I'd look hella undignified if I didn't spew something similar.

Knowing a cue when I see one, I took a step forward to introduce myself.

"Greetings, Lord Barthomeloi and heir Barthomeloi. I am Alistair Pendragon, heir presumptive to the Pendragon name. I have heard good things about your family's ability to hunt the undead, so I look forward to working together with the two of you." I said in about as formal a tone as I could muster, without seeming like a total suck-up.

Seeing that the introductions were done, the adults continued their little conversation, leaving Lorelei and me to awkwardly stare at one another.

Well, I say awkwardly in loose terms, as she seemed to have no problems blankly staring at me, with no visible signs of discomfort.

Perhaps this was some sort of game of 'the weaker party will speak first,' but I can't be bothered, as this is an awful first interaction.

Gazing past her, I saw that the butlers behind her were holding bags, probably filled with Mystic Codes and the like.

Asking about what they are or do might be overstepping, but I'm bored and need to make a conversation start somehow.

Tilting my head to the side, I pointedly looked behind her before turning my head back to her. "Any useful Mystic Codes that I should know about?" I probed, making a slight frown plaster itself onto her face.

"No," she said stiffly, making me sigh.

"You know you are making it hard to start a conversation when you give one-word responses." I explained, making her tilt her head to the side while keeping the slight frown.

"Why do we need to talk? We have nothing to talk about," she intoned in a flat tone, which I was starting to understand was par for the course when it came to her.

Well shit, is she autistic?

Like, fuck me, can't she read a social cue?

Our parents are obviously not including us in their conversation so that we could get to know one another before the hunt, but she either doesn't care or is unaware.

Neither bodes well for me.

Sighing, I glanced at the adults.

"I think Lorelei and I are both eager to head off and start the hunt." I smoothly interjected myself into their conversation, completely ignoring whatever they were saying to one another.

The two glanced at us before looking at one another and shrugging.

"I agree with little Lorelei," Lorelei gave a slight twitch at the name, "and young Alistair, we should probably get going," he said.

Mother nodded at his words before gesturing at my car.

"Have your assistants pack your stuff and hop on in," she said, before turning on the spot.

Following her lead, I walked to the driver's seat, which was on the wrong side, damn Americans, and promptly seated myself before turning on the engine.

The boot's lock gave a soft click before being gently opened by the butlers, who placed their bags into the back of the car.

Swiftly, the two passenger doors opened, and the two Barthomeloi's entered the car while curiously studying the interior.

"This is a… unique… aesthetic," Barthomeloi said skeptically, making me give an amused snort from the driver's seat.

"It's a military vehicle, of course it's a bit spartan, but what it lacks in looks, it more than makes up for in reliability," I explained, as the boot's door was slammed closed by the butlers.

Taking that as my cue, I slowly pressed on the accelerator while gently releasing the clutch.

As the car sprang to life, I drove through the open hangar door and towards what I hoped was an exit.

As my gamble paid off, I finally drove onto the road, but as I was about to slide into the left-hand side of the road, Mother leaned over and grabbed the wheel.

"What?" I exclaimed in mild shock and anger.

"We're not in England! Norway has right-hand side driving!" she explained.

Swiftly, I turned the wheel, putting us on the 'right' side of the road.

Ah, how could I forget the savagery of the outside world?

They didn't know how to make their cars, putting the driver's seat on the wrong side, and neither did they know which side the car was meant to drive on.

Utter savages, and you wonder why we had to bring Britain to them. Clearly, they still need some good education.

Sighing, I glanced at my mother before asking an important question. "Can you plug in the address into the GPS?" I asked, before returning my sight to the road.

While I should have probably asked a bit sooner, there was only a single road to use, and it wasn't important until now.

Aka, I forgot to ask, and Mother had forgotten to tell me where we were going.

But my question only gained an amused chuckle. "Sorry, but the GPS doesn't have a satellite close enough to us for it to work." She explained, before pulling out a large map.

Fuck, I hate maps… or at least when others try to backseat drive me with maps.

I totally forgot that the GPS was actually relatively 'new', as in it was made seven years ago.

Focusing on the road, I could still see that Mother was folding open a giant map in the corner of my eye.

"Umm, take the first lef— umm." She cut herself off, before rotating the map and humming in approval. "Take the first right! And in the following roun—"

~~Fate/False Order~~

Barthomeloi ended up reading the map after Mother gave the wrong directions twice.

And that was for the better, as he gave clear instructions and actually could read a map.

Mother, of course, was dismissive about the fact that she couldn't read one properly, as the whole point of having Amelia was apparently meant to make up for her few, pronounced many, shortcomings.

As I drove us over a mountainside, a familiar feeling washed over all of us.

"Stop the car," Barthomeloi said in a low tone, making me hit the brakes.

As the car skidded to a halt, we all looked out and scanned our surroundings. We had all felt the bounded field, meaning that somewhere close should be its anchor.

The mountain ridge around us was jagged and spotted with boulders, but suspiciously lacking the layer of snow covering the rest of the mountain.

"Found it." Lorelei's voice sounded eager for once, but her words made us all look in her direction.

Her window faced the cliff wall, which looked kind of bland and unassuming, and for the life of me, I couldn't see the anchor of the field there.

She lowered the window and pointed her finger at the mountainside. Wind started to coil itself atop her outstretched fingertip before shooting off towards the wall.

The instant it made contact, it resembled a small explosion, as the spot it hit keeled in on itself, spreading long cracks along the wall. Followed by the feeling of a bounded field falling apart.

Holy. Fucking. Shit. What the hell was that?

Wind is not known for doing shit like that.

I have a few wind mysteries under my belt, and boy, they can't do that.

Could I do it with some others? Yes, obviously, but it's the principle.

I've tried to make something similar to what she just did with each element, and wind is the only one where the mysteries I use simply fall apart, be it due to overstress or incompatibilities among the ones I use.

And here is Lorelei, doing it as if it's the most basic thing in the world.

Safe to say, from here out I am going to use my eyes on every little bit of magecraft the two perform, as this is a golden opportunity to learn a thing or two.

"It should be a bit further up," Mother said, snapping me out of my daze.

Instantly, my gaze focused itself onto the road, and I stepped on the accelerator

Seeing no point in being subtle anymore, I started hauling ass.

No one seemed to complain, as the first bounded field was meant for detection, something like a doorbell for Louvre, so subtlety was out the window.

After driving up another hill, we were met with a disgusting sight.

Ghouls.

Half-frozen decaying ghouls, in the dozens.

Their clothes were tattered, their skin darkened, wrinkled and oozing with blood and other fluids, with flecks of frost coating their bodies. They resembled the ugly love child of a zombie from The Walking Dead and one from Game of Thrones.

Not hesitating, I shifted gear and flattened the accelerator.

Ghouls were stronger than the average person, as well as being more durable, despite being a pile of rotting flesh. So flattening a few of them with the car would be a good start, but we'd still need to clean up quickly, as they can somehow regenerate.

Ramming into the flock of ghouls, the windshield was spattered with blood and guts, making me flinch back in surprise.

Turning on the windshield wipers, I saw them move small chunks of meat, guts, organs, and a whole load of blood.

The sight, along with the 'improvised speed bumps,' made me feel my lunch start to make its way up my throat.

While I had been a soldier in my last life, I was not accustomed to seeing this level of gore. If I wished to see blood and guts on the daily, I'd have become a doctor, not a soldier.

Having driven through the horde, I continued forward, wanting to have as much distance between me and those disgusting things.

No one seemed to bother to comment on the horde, so I too, tactfully ignored it.

As we drove further into the mountain region, I saw something that spelled the end of our little road trip.

"That looks about right," Mother commented, drawing a hum of approval from Barthomeloi.

In the distance, there was a large stone stronghold protruding out of a cliffside, along with a monstrously large door at the bottom.

Slowly driving closer, I stopped the car about 15 feet away from the door.

Turning off the ignition and pocketing the key, I, and the rest, hopped out of the car.

All of us glanced at the door a bit blankly before I looked over at Barthomeloi.

"Is this normal for Apostles? Seems a bit overkill," I commented, making the older Barthomeloi give me an amused look.

"Not quite this… 'lavish, but yes'," he explained, making me nod.

Glancing back and forth between him, Mother, and the door, I let out a sigh. "How are we going to mess with the bounded fields?" I probed.

God knows the door is obviously double-triple protected with a fuckton of bounded fields. I mean, it's practically radiating with hostile intent. And like hell am I going to touch the damn thing.

At this, Lorelei seemed to perk up before walking back to the car. Opening the boot, she started rummaging in one of the bags before pulling out a metal square-shaped object.

As she made her way over to us, she glanced at Barthomeloi. "Father, can I test my own first? I'd like to gather some test results." Her tone was almost giddy as she caressed her cube.

Kinda creepy, if I was being honest, but I decided to mercifully ignore it.

Barthomeloi cupped his chin, then gave a nod. "Sure, I have confidence in your Mystic Code."

Lorelei flashed her father a smile before walking over to the door.

As she got within arm's distance of the door, she slammed the cube on it.

Knowing that now was the time, I flooded Od into my eyes. Lorelei's temperature seemed to peak as she shoved her Od into the cube.

The snow falling on her started to vaporize the second it touched her, causing steam to appear around her.

The cube morphed, gaining a few tendrils that started caressing the door.

Instantly, a visible bounded field sprung out of the box, encompassing the door, before turning transparent.

The sight, along with the information my eyes were feeding me, made my eyes widen in shock.

Fuck.

Holy fuck.

This type of magecraft is the kind that gets you slapped with a Sealing Designation.

If the information my eyes are telling me is to be trusted, then the Mystic Code Lorelei made could produce a bounded field that bordered so close to being a reality marble, that with the limited information, I can't tell the difference.

Now, I know a lot about bounded fields, but the library doesn't have much on reality marbles, as they are a big no-no.

The only thing I know for sure is that they are basically the peak of bounded fields.

And that is either the peak, or stupidly close to being the peak.

I find it a bit odd, but understandable, for the Barthomeloi family to be able to create custom mini-reality marble Mystic Codes, given the fact that they have been hunting them for generations.

But it felt a bit hypocritical, seeing as they were the ones to monitor the rules in the Clock Tower.

But fuck, if the information I'm getting from the Mystic Code is correct, then they are really fucking useful.

The pseudo-reality marble in front of me had the effect of not allowing any bounded fields in its vicinity.

Naturally, it is slowly destroying itself, due to being a bounded field as well, but I could already tell that the door was as good as harmless now.

After staring and memorizing as much as I could about the mysteries used in the Mystic Code, the box started to crumble, snapping me out of my haze.

Barthomeloi turned to look at the two of us and gave us a smile. "I hope the two of you will keep this to yourselves." He said while pointedly looking at me.

I quickly glanced at Mother, who didn't seem all too surprised, so I assumed that she already knew, and gave a small nod to Barthomeloi.

"Of course," I replied, making the older man give a nod.

"Good." He said, before placing a palm on the door.

Slowly he gave it a push, causing the door to creak open, just enough for us to enter through.

"Well then," Barthomeloi said while looking back at us. "Who wants to go in first?"

-----

A/N

Welcome back, my reader Overlords, please add this to your library and give me some comments, stones and Reviews, as it would be much appreciated.

Now that the mandatory begging is done, time to ask the hard hitting questions.

What do you all think of the Barthomelois? Impressive aren't they? And whats your thoughts on Lorelei, better known as The Queen of the Clock Tower in the future?

Any thoughts on what you wish to see in the apostles nest? Any sick desire of seeing something gruesome? If so, then I'll hopefully deliver. 

Btw, I have made a Discord server for the fic, come on and chat with me! https://discord.gg/wWRhZrbx

Now I'm tired, so have a nice day, and send me some stones or some shit, I need motivation, or some shit like that.