♟️twenty-two | Tristan

♟️ Illusion by Dua Lipa

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"They don't curse, they aren't rude even less hostile, they are well educated, do well in school, are liked by everyone, I taught them French, Italian, Spanish, and dad... dad helped with the Greek. I taught them how to ice skate, but Atlas likes hockey and lacrosse, while Athena us more delicate and loves ballet and she was also in the choir of the church. I lost my will to be much of a believer, but they are catholic like father and you."

"They pray before eating any meal and before sleeping, and they are thankful for their life and everything in the world, they won't grow to be spoiled, I taught them how to value money, but they are competitive. They love classical music and pop, Atlas plays the violin and the guitar, while Athena plays the violin, the piano, and the harp," sigh. "They have a good appetite, eat their vegetables, love fruits, are moderate on the sugar, and I kept them far away from caffeine. While Atlas's favorite dishes are sushi related, Athena loves pasta, and their favorite ice cream is strawberry flavored, like you used to."

She swallowed, her voice losing potency, "They don't have bad eyesight like me, even less ADHD, OCD, or anxiety, I made sure the doctors would examine them to be sure they wouldn't be defective as I came out, so you wouldn't cut them out of your life like you did me, if one day they ever wanted to seek you out. I was afraid of them suffering bullying for being to damn kind, so, I taught them taekwondo, and overall self-defense. Athena had her period 13 months ago, she has soft cramps and her blood doesn't flows much, but I always help her with warm towels and she also likes warm jasmine tea."

"Atlas has soft pains in his back ever since he fell from the stairs of his damned school and hit it on the hard edge of it, he doesn't cry about it, but when he's in pain he scratches the back of his neck, and a soft massage helps, I do it with a ointment for torsions that I usually use in my muscle torsions from track and field, ice skating, and taekwondo. Your step-son probably has some, since he's a hockey player, every athlete has it, if you give to Athena, she'll know how to help him, since I taught her. They aren't troublesome in any way, I taught them how to respect rules, and,"

"Why do you speak as if you raised them alone?" She swallowed. "What about your father? Where was Dean?"

A silence befall the room, until the girl sighed, "You're lucky I'm too fucked up in the head right now with the grieving, or I would give you a horrible answer. However, as I'm too damn tired for that, I'll just say it as a normal person would. Father still loved you, he got depressed when you left us for your old money rich British husband because he couldn't provide you the life you... deserved it in LA, so, he grew hateful of himself. He... became obsessed with his own work, and the little time he had, he used up on being angry with me for not being perfect enough for you, and he would be around to give a goodnight kiss on the kids after I had put them to bed."

"I don't feel like it's right to talk about that right now, because I can't speak my mind, or that would be offensive to him, and I can't allow that to happen, not now. Besides, you don't get to say shit, Juliette, at least father was here, at least we slept knowing he was at home and working his ass off to provide for us the best he could, he tried to be more for us, in a way he was unable to be for you. So even if he had his shortcomings, he was still here, and he... he tried to make up in the past months, he was present and he was kind for a change, and the kids needed that."

"And I may not have been able to do the best job I could, because I still had to train and study, but I did my best, I did more than you ever did, for them and for me, because I didn't want them to suffer like I did. I don't wish that to anyone, not even my worst enemy. So, I may not be the best example, but at least I tried, at least I swallowed my own fucking problems and put them first in my life, like I would my children. They are my everything, and if you hurt them like you hurt me, Juliette, even if I can't do shit to you right now, I will hunt you down and make you pay for it. Don't fuck this up."

"And," another pause, "they always wanted to know their step-brother. I may have horrible thoughts about him, but they don't, I didn't mirror my own thoughts to them, that would be too cruel. But if Tristan do anything to them, or if he's nasty to them, I'll fucking destroy him, even if it takes me a lifetime to do it, I will not accept that your step-son dares to mistreat your real kids. Especially not when my siblings have always been interested in having an older brother, even if I hated the idea, they are not like me. They are better than I'll ever be, and I hope... you will cherish them."

"I tried," her voice broke again and she swallowed, "I tried, but I'm not enough, okay? I'll never say this again, I have my damn pride, but I'm not enough to them, they need a mother, and though my father will never be replaced, if your husband is okay with it, it would be nice if he could... if he could he nice to them. My father never blamed his son, never, sure, he did say I was insufficient and unlovable because I wasn't good enough to reach his level and make you stay," she chuckled sarcastically and I froze, hands clenching in fists, "but he never blamed the boy. Neither did he hate your husband, he just felt... inferior to him."

"I'm the hostile one, he didn't project his hostility on me, if you ever thought that, I'm the one who did that. I'm just glad that he only projected his thoughts about having inferior genes passed down to a kid on me and not on the twins, that was something I'm thankful for. I can take the burden but the kids shouldn't, because I lived 7 years with you, they didn't, so it was indeed all on my toddler perfomance as a daughter. I guess I wouldn't get a gold medal on that," she joked self-deprecatingly. "Either way, I don't matter in this, they do. Their health is strong, but they are both allergic to nuts and bees, please, be careful with that."

"Atlas likes to skate, as in the plank kind of skate, he likes that, while Athena is more of a roller skate kind of girl, I taught them both. They love soccer, what you all call football, they root for Manchester City and Paris Saint Germain, their favorite pop singers are Taylor Swift for Athena and Bruno Mars for Atlas, and taught them both how to cook, so you also don't need to worry about that. They really won't order much of your time, just a little bit with school assignments. Atlas struggles a bit with English and his favorite subject is Science, while Athena struggles with Math and her favorite subject is History."

She seemed to drink something, "Keep them far away from caffeine, I got the bad habit from dad, and they have a stupid craving to try mimicking me on it, so, keep coffee far away from them."