Chapter 293: Of Choices Made

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I tend to upload drafts of early chapters on there to get people's opinions of them so you can read up to 20 chapters ahead as a bonus.

I would like to thank my beta, Awdyr, for his help in this chapter.

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23 November 1994, Rome, Italy

Harry sipped on his goblet, doing his best not to cringe at the bitterness of the juice… After all, it wouldn't do to insult the hosting school publicly. It came as a bit of a surprise, but he grew to like this school... Its library was sparse, to say the least, the spells were publicized, and he heavily believed that any sensitive tomes were hidden from the public… However, there was something nice about the lack of nonsense that was seen in everything around the school.

There was still a weird obsession with Ancient Rome everywhere, but there were no hidden passages, no secret chambers, no confusing corridors… Sure, a lot of the wonder was lost but it was efficient, spartan for the lack of a better word.

It provided a lack of distractions that Harry found to be very valuable since he had a lot on his mind. The revelation of Lily hiding pertinent information from him was weighing very heavily on his mind and he needed to delicately decide what to do…

The situation was delicate. Lily was possibly his greatest ally against Dumbledore. She had gained frightful control over the British Ministry of Magic in just a few months, and had an entire army of enhanced werewolves supporting her… He did not want her to be an enemy, and yet she had broken his trust.

It was probably the first time that he had tried to trust someone else. To be completely fair to himself, it was a very impulsive decision… However, he was so caught up with the allure that there was someone else like him, someone who could keep up with him and be on his side, that he ignored a lot of warning signs.

There was also Daphne to consider. She was very attached to Lily and was convinced that she was the key to saving her sister. As he had stated before, the entire situation was so delicate.

And to make all of this worse, he had to attend some mindless feast to celebrate the end of the task… The Champions all came and showed their prizes. It was funny that the Hogwarts Champions, who actually won the task, didn't get any prizes since they hadn't defeated any of the beasts in the arena.

It was just hours of showboating that Harry barely had the patience to sit through. Thankfully, no one tried to engage him in conversation. Daphne was surprisingly quiet during all of this…

Speaking of the blonde she spoke up, "Do you mind if we talked privately for a second?"

Deciding that it was a great chance of getting away, he nodded, and they snuck out of the hall under a notice-me-not charm. They ended up in one of the corridors and Daphne quickly put up some privacy charms, "You weren't kidding about wanting to be alone. Is there something wrong?"

"Yes. No. I don't know," she stammered, "It's all so complicated and I don't know if I should just go ahead and say it. I thought about not doing anything, but I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if something happened…"

"What's going on Daphne?" he asked, "Just say it and be done with it…"

"Your mother is working with Albus Dumbledore…" she quickly spoke up.

Harry froze. He hadn't expected that… No, that wasn't completely true, he expected that Lily was doing something else behind his back… But working with Dumbledore, the man that she had claimed was one of the main instigators in the Fire of Godric's Hollow, the man who had almost killed Harry numerous times… He didn't expect that much.

To be honest, he didn't think she was Dumbledore's subordinate… He had a good estimation of her personality. She was ruthless, pragmatist, power-hungry, and obsessive, but her most defining character trait was her pursuit of her freedom.

So, either Dumbledore was offering her something she desired, or his goals were also something that she wanted.

But no, there was no need for speculation without additional information, "Explain!" he simply retorted.

"Granger gave me this photo of her and Dumbledore talking to each other in his office… I wanted to tell you immediately, but she used some kind of compulsion charm that bypassed my family crest and made me tell her everything… She said that it was to help you, to protect you from Dumbledore and asked me not to say anything. But I just couldn't… What if she was lying? What if she wanted to hurt you? I just couldn't…"

Harry quickly analysed his friend's rambling… It didn't make sense that Lily would protect him from Dumbledore without asking him first. Sure, it was a plausible idea on the surface, but they both knew that Harry was a reasonable person and that he definitely wouldn't have tolerated someone going behind his back to Dumbledore to protect him. And she definitely wouldn't have hidden Maria's origins from him for no reason…

No, the former headmaster must have asked her to stop his investigation as much as possible… He wouldn't have done that if what he was planning wasn't delicate enough that Harry could stop… And Lily must have agreed to let his plan continue… She must have planned to use it to her advantage somehow…

The fact that it was Hermione Granger that told her was very interesting. He had no illusions that she was completely under Lily's control since she probably had the Diary… So, that meant that the girl must have wanted the leash around her neck gone and thought that his making Lily leave was the best idea to have more freedom.

But one thing was for certain. By telling him this, Daphne was putting her lessons with Lily, and the potential of a cure for her sister's condition, in jeopardy. He appreciated the show of trust and her dedication, "She threatened to stop her lessons, didn't she?"

Daphne looked down, "Yes… But what would they have mattered if we were both dead before I found a cure for my sister? We both know that it would have taken years to figure that one out… And Dumbledore's plan ends in June… I wouldn't have been able to help my sister if I was dead…"

Yes, and Lily also wouldn't have agreed to her lessons at all if Daphne wasn't his friend and held some influence over her decisions, but Harry didn't voice it. Instead, he gave her a warm smile, "I appreciate your trust in me, Daph."

"Oh, isn't that cute?" a familiar voice spoke up from behind him.

Daphne stiffened but Harry turned unconcerned to stare at his biological mother, "Hello, Lily."

"Oh, Harry dear… We're quite in the predicament, aren't we?"

He snorted, "You could say that…"

"While I admire Daphne's loyalty to you, she's not really giving you the full picture."

"And what is the full picture, then?"

Her smile became slightly more assured, "Alright, I made a mistake… I wanted you to be safe, so I made a deal with Dumbledore to keep you out of his, and in exchange, he wouldn't kill you… I know that this is a breach of trust, but you can see my point here…"

"I do see it, and I also know that it's full of shit…"

That seemed to take her aback, "What are you talking about?"

"Maria De Luca," he retorted, "You didn't seriously believe that I would take your word for not finding the girl… You're many things, Lily, but you're not incompetent. But imagine my surprise when I used a bit of scrying and saw you at the girl's orphanage and even obliviating the nuns there to hide her involvement. You were probably the one who made sure that there were no signs of her disappearance in the muggle authorities, weren't you? Now, there's misleading my investigation, and there's hiding evidence…"

Lily frowned, "Huh, you found out about that, huh…"

"Yes, maybe I am, but that's not it. The way you hid as an Unspeakable in our midst, the way you tried to obliviate me… You didn't think I'd forget about that, did you? You were never planning on me knowing you were there, or even alive for that matter… If you didn't want to speak with me, you could have had an actual real Unspeakable here, since you're in control of the department, instead of personally coming to find me… So, you need me for something…"

"You're my son!"

Harry hummed and continued, "Maybe, but you waited months and took over half of Magical Britain before even thinking about me. Maybe there's a part of you that cares about me, but there's something else, something more to it… Something that you want enough to go through Dumbledore's insane ritual."

"Don't pretend like you wouldn't have done the same! You're just like me!"

"You're right… Maybe I would have done something like this to protect Daphne. Maybe I am just like you, but there's one fundamental difference. You're ready to betray everything and everyone to achieve your goals, whatever they may be, but I'm not. Then again, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe you're telling the truth. Maybe you're an idiot who trusted Dumbledore enough that he would keep his word. Maybe you're even his lackey, one of his mad followers, and you lost your precious independence once more… Maybe you're not as smart as you think you are… Maybe you were dumb enough to lose your freedom once more."

"That's enough… I'm just using Dumbledore, exactly like I'm using…" she stopped herself in the end.

Harry hummed leadingly, "Like you're using who? Me?"

Lily stayed silent and her entire countenance changed. Her pleading expression morphed into a frosty neutral one, the slight passion in her eyes fizzled out and she spoke up in a monotone voice, "What a disappointment…"

"Because you couldn't trick me?"

"No, because you cannot see the bigger picture. You threw away an entire army and a nation supporting you because I did something without telling you first. I tried being the loving mother, I really did. But you made it so hard… It was the first time that I struggled while doing something. It was a frustrating experience."

Harry hummed, "One that mothers everywhere experience… But you're not a typical mother, are you?"

"And you are not a typical son… I was actually looking forward to meeting you, to see if you inherited anything from me. And you did, that mind of yours is spectacular… It's a shame that you waste it the way you do."

"How am I wasting my intelligence then?"

She snorted, "You're quick to judge the world, too quick. You're impulsive, but I guess you got that from your father… But you're thinking too small. You use your brilliant mind to mess with people, watch them slowly tie a rope around their necks with your tricks, instead of doing anything proactive. You're just so passive. Why didn't you try to actively go after Dumbledore? Why didn't you actively try to impact magical Britain to make it serve your needs when you graduate? You certainly could carve out a small piece of the world, a heaven for your own desires… You try to distance yourself from the game, while messing with people left and right, finding pressure points, and not using them. You live your life on a knife's edge, not accomplishing anything without it being a reaction, not realizing even a fraction of your potential."

"Then I should have been like you, then? Take over werewolf packs and ministries like some kind of shadow leader?"

"No, you should have a goal, an ambition to follow… Something to strive towards instead of just trying to find out what Dumbledore is planning and paranoia about being used as someone else's pawn."

That struck home, oddly enough. When was the last time he had a proper goal to strive towards? Sure, he wanted to be remembered, to be someone important, to discover the mysteries of magic… But he hadn't built a new artefact in months… He hadn't challenged himself without it being a crisis for so long…

No, this wasn't about him… He would deal with that later. Now, the main issue was Lily, "Maybe you're right, but you're still trying to distract me. Tell me what you really want from me?"

The redhead chuckled bitterly, "No. Maybe you're right, maybe I was planning on betraying you in a dramatic fashion… Maybe I was planning to sacrifice you for some obscure ritual… But maybe I just wanted to be a mother to you, to experience what it was like to be my son and you spit on my face… That's your punishment… You don't get to know. Maddening, isn't it? You're like me… You need to know, to unearth the truth… Not knowing is like this itch on the back of your head, one that you can't scratch... Maybe you revealed an enemy… Maybe you lost the chance at having someone to relate to and one of the greatest allies against your enemies. You'll never ever know… I'm not going to fight you because I know for sure that you'll regret this. One day, you will wake up alone and in danger, and you will see just how much you messed up. You will come to me, begging for help, and I hope, for your sake, that I will be in a generous mood then. I will not fight you because there's no reason to... No matter what you think my plans are, you will always come back to me."

She turned and started to walk away, "I will admit that I'm not a good person. I've done my share of atrocities and I haven't hidden any of them. But you're not a saint either, Harry. You have lied, just as I did, made hidden plans, just like you did, and manipulated people for my own ends, just like you have. And as much as you dislike me, all the paths you take, if you survive your journey, will lead to you becoming me… Don't worry, just give it time... One day, you'll wake up and see me in the mirror and I hope you remember this moment when you do..."

And just like that, she was gone, leaving Harry just as confused as he was irritated. This had definitely not gone well, and he might have just lost his biggest supporter…

This was a fucking mess.

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AN: I don't really like the resolution of this... Especially the way that Harry reacted, then again, he didn't really have time to think about what Daphne told him and he's not really rational when it comes to Dumbledore, since he tried to kill him and all.

I was also going with Harry being blindsided since everything happened on the same day, and both he and Lily lashing out... Still, Lily has her own reasons (no spoilers sorry :D) but it was supposed to be somewhat emotional, but I don't think I did it right since I didn't write any chapters that highlight her feelings. You should have a better idea of that in the next chapter but I probably should have found a way to put it before this one. Unfortunately, I couldn't find any way to do that without some major spoilers...

Still, the outcome was always going to be the same since it's important for the next arc, but I think I handled the entire confrontation badly, starting from the previous chapter. I think I didn't show just how desperate Lily was for Harry to not suspect anything and also grow to like her, it was enough to threaten Daphne, enough to lash out when he says something that she doesn't like.

Anyway, I rewrote this chapter twice and this was the best I could come up with. Anyway, I might rewrite this part (I'll notify you if I do), and I'd really appreciate your suggestions on how to make it better.

I've been in a bit of a rut since my trip, but things should be a lot better going forward. I feel like I have to apologize for how I handled this... Anyway, I'll have a lot more time and will put in a lot more thoughts in the next chapters. I'm really excited for the next arc (It's a lot more eventful, trust me).

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If you want to support me check out my patréon at https://www.patréon.com/athassprkr

I tend to upload drafts of early chapters on there to get people's opinions of them so you can read up to 20 chapters ahead as a bonus.

Thank you guys for your support in these hard times.