DIDN'T CHOOSE TO BE SICK

3am to 5am Asthma hit me

The noise,the chaos

Nobody could focus

Mum told dad to go out

Search for a chemist about

But it was so late

It brought a fight

It was chaos that night

I couldn't help but cry

Till the sun came,my eyes weren't dry

I actually wished to die

Trust me the wish wasn't a lie

I had to pretend to be fine

I had to make it seem real

Had to hide the pain I still feel

It's my fault

It's my fault they fought

But Its not fault for the illness I've got

I abused myself

The day the break up began

And now am facing it

My memories are unstable

Remembering details am unable

But I've tried to gain weight

I still don't look that great

But it's better

Cause then I looked like a feather

I could heal from anorexia,I try to control my asthma,I could maybe heal from dementia

But what about depression

Always drowning

When am reaching out

Then comes the wave

Am binded with the shackles like a slave

It cuts deep like a blade

Until forever,the pain could never fade

Yh I feel empty

I feel weak

Most people think,it's a trick

Call me liar,fake,your pick

But know I didn't choose to be sick

Depressed,lonely as I watch the clock tick