50
I sit with Gabi my whole body feels numb, I wipe my face again as tears slowly fall still, Ryan fell asleep again and I was trying not to wake her up again
The door opens and I look up too see Antonio and Jay walk in
I look down at Ryan as I was trying not to look at Jay at the moment
Jay looks at Ryan, I pull her closer to my body
"Ke-" Jay was about to talk but Antonio stopped him
"What did we just talk about" Antonio says and Jay backs up and my older brother steps forward and sits down beside me
"How you feeling?" He asks and I shrug looking at Jay then back at my daughter who's face was tear stained
"I'm fine" I say pulling my daughter closer to my chest laying my head on top of hers
"Jay do you trust my sister?" Antonio says looking at him
"I do" he says taking a step closer
"Than why'd you say all that?" I ask as Gabi took Ryan from me and walked towards her room
"I was mad at myself for something and I took it out on you and I am so sorry" Jay says placing his hands in his hair
"You never answered my question earlier why did you have my file?" I ask moving away from Antonio and leaning into the couch which basically swallows me up
"You dont talk alot about your past and I wanted to know more about it and I needed to know more about Michael before asking something, so I looked at both of your files" he says looking at his feet
"I got one more question" Antonio says breaking an awkward silence
"How much do you love my sister?" He asks as Gabi walks out of the room
"With everything I have, I'd give the world up for you Kennedy" he says walking closer until he was right in front of me
I look down at my lap where my hands were laid laced together
I take a deep breath in looking up to see Jay on one knee
"I know I messed up so fucking badly and I know this won't fix it but" Jay starts pulling out a small black velvet box
"But I love you so much and I want to spend everyday waking up to you, seeing you smile, I remember when I first met you I thought you were the most beautiful woman in the world" he says grabbing my hand
"Actually this isn't right" he says standing and I frown but I look up to see him walking towards Ryan's room
I see Ryan running out smiling, she runs and sits between Antonio and I
"This is better" he smiles getting back down on one knee and smiling
"I never thought I'd find someone like you and I never thought I would fall in love with someone so fast" he says I hear a sniffle and look over at Antonio wiping his eyes
"There was one person before you that hurt me so bad I thought I would never love someone like them again but I was wrong I love you even more than everything in this world, and you brought someone into my life that love just as much" he smiles looking at Ryan
"I want a chance to be an amazing husband and father" he says letting go of my hand as I do my best not to cry but tears kept slipping down my cheek he opens the small box revealing a beautiful ring
"This is my mother's ring and I wish she was here to meet you and Ryan, I know she would have loved you both" he says tearing up a little
"I wish I was able to do this in front of all our closet friends and family but this feels right just us and a few of our closet family" he says looking at Gabi and Antonio, Antonio places his hand on Jay's shoulder smiling in approval as Gabi places her hand on his forearm quickly, they both take their hands away and Gabi gives me a quick hug and Antonio reaches over kissing the side of my head
"So Kennedy Isabella Dawson will you make me the happiest man alive and marry me?" He asks and I look at my older sibling and they were smiling
"Yes" I say as Jay smiles slipping the ring on my finger Ryan smiles hugging me
"I have one more thing" he says pulling another smaller ring with a pearl on it
"Ryan Alexandria Dawson-Green" he says turning towards her and grabbing her hand, I realize what he was doing and smile
"I love you just as much as your mom and I love watching you grow up, I know I am not your father and I will never be able to fill his shoes but I would love it if you'd give me the chance to be there everyday for you" he says
"So Ryan will you let me be there for you as long as I live?" He asks and she looks at me and I nod my head
"Ya" he slips the ring on her right index finger
I kiss the top of her head and smile at Jay
He gets up hugging us both then kissing me
"I love you" he says as Ryan slips out of our grip
I look over Jay's shoulder to see Antonio with tears in his eyes as he held his niece
I smile looking at my sister and Jay, I've never seen her so happy before
I remember when Jay asked me for permission
We were called to a scene and it was more serious so we called the station
I see a few cars pull up and see Jay, Adam, Antonio, Alvin, Kevin, and Hank. For some reason Jay looked really nervous today
After 30 minutes Intelligence had all they needed so they were about to leave, and so was Sylvie and I
I closed the ambu's back doors and I hear someone clear their throat behind me
I turn and see Jay
"Uh hey I need to ask you something?" He says shuffling in place with his hands in his pockets