Dear Diary

"Stay a little longer with me… Please?"

Someone begged, his hand suddenly grabbed a hold of mine and I flinched before feeling all the heat and tingles spread up my arms. I sighed, his hold on me seemed to make all the misery in my life away. I was surprised when his hand didn't let go of mine and instead moved so that our fingers were locked with each other. His touch was feathery and soft and sent a wave of electric shock through my body, making me lean more into his touch.

I stared at our hands with wide eyes and felt my cheeks start to burn. God had created him in his spare time, perfecting each detail. I thought.

His muscular physics well-supported his stall frame. His eyes held so much depth; even the ocean could shy away. My heart held infinite longing and love for him, and the surprising thing is that I don't even know him properly.

"Just enjoy our beautiful moment love don't think about anything, you will not remember my face when you wake up, whatever you remember, it will be my feelings and affection towards you. That's it!"

He said, and sat down on the sand, pulling me down with him. We sat there in front of the calming waves with the sand covering our feet and a gentle breeze blowing through our hair… The sky was painted yellow, purple, and pink as the sun began to set. I felt comfortable around an unknown person. Like he is the only one who can fill the emptiness inside me with his presence. In my painful world, his love will be my light. I let out a breath and racked my head for any good memories, finally coming up with one.

"I can read your mind, I can hear thoughts. Rachel, you can share your every memory with me and I will change your every pain in comfort. It is my promise to you."

He said, but before I could answer, he mumbled something,

"Then I will hurt you in my way"

Even though he knew I couldn't hear him.

I shared my best memory with him, about my family, 5 years ago, my mom-dad and my little brother came to the beach for the whole day, spending the day playing in the water and building sandcastles. That was my best day ever. I remember when my father taught me how to swim. My only beautiful memory.

I shrugged, and he soothed a little closer to me and sighed.

"Look at me"

I did as he said and then felt him staring at me with eyes touched by snow, cold consumed in the shade of sapphire blue, like the many facets of a real gem. And on the briefest movements our shoulders touched, my breath getting caught in my throat, and soon he tugged my body gently towards him, and I loved every second of it when we were both enjoying each other's warmth and support. I buried my face in his neck while my finger was tangled up in his hair, breathing his scent, making me almost melt in his arm. I was a blushing mess as I have never been touched by a man like this before. He nuzzled his face in my hair and inhaled deeply. I wondered if he could also feel the spark that danced around in my body.

After a long moment, he lessened his hold on me, but he still made sure that he held me tight enough, so I couldn't push him away and when our eyes met again it seemed like I was unable to take my eyes away from him ever.

"Just one kiss will change everything, my angel, trust me"

He said sharply looking right in front of my eyes and I felt butterflies in my stomach. My blood ran cold at his word. Right then he came close to me and leaned down to match our body perfectly, his lips inches away from mine.

"Just a kiss, princess, may I?"

He whispered against my lips, causing chills to pass me. His large hand cupped my right cheek, making me shudder under his touch. I slowly relaxed into his gentle and soft touch, and my lips automatically parted for him. Inviting him to claim. Slowly looking into my eyes, giving me a reassuring gaze, he joined his lips to mine and I felt tingles erupt all over my body. Suddenly, blood rushed to my head and I felt every pain get clouded already. His other hand grabbed the side of my neck, causing me to wince with sparks as his left thumb stroked my cheeks. Slowly his lips began to move against me. I slowly moved my lips together, matching him, although I had nothing against his experience. His teeth nipped at my lower and opened my mouth, his tongue immediately started doing his magic, causing me to release a soft moan. It was magical for me. Something exceptional.

But not for so long, suddenly his hand roughly went behind me and held the back of my neck, tugging, making me forcefully face for his easier access.

"You are stupid just like your sister"

He whispered and started kissing me roughly and even a bit down my lips. I tried to resist but couldn't do anything as compared to me, he was stronger. He started sucking my lips brutally, there was no gentleness like before. I whimpered, but he ignored my pain. I can't help but cry and cry.

Furthermore, I felt hot tears spill out of my eyes as I looked at the same person who was holding me close and loving me just a moment ago, but now he became a heartless monster.

And with this same bad and strange dream which has become a part of my life now, I started by another day.

Dear Diary,

Lying in my bed. Just lost in my head,

staring at these walls. And wishing I was dead

I feel so stressed. And I feel so depressed,

I wish I could remember. When I last got some rest. I don't know how I got this way. I am disappointed that no one cares. Think about them, and gasp for air. I don't deserve all of this life. There are no angels up above

As every morning comes after the night, I wish that all the grief of my life could be lost in the same morning. May some lights come into my life and brighten every corner of it. I am waiting for the star that brightens my lonely sky with the light of his love. Now that you're gone, I realize how much you meant to me.

My loss is wide as a starless night sky, and deep as a stormy sea. I miss the comfort of your sweet love, your absolute devotion; Now I'm a fountain of endless tears, a pool of sad emotions. They tell me I should move on with life, That time will heal my pain; I smile and nod and agree with them. While I slowly go insane.

My name is Rachel Moon and right now, I am 17 years old. I live in an orphanage that is far away from the hustle and bustle of city life. I was never like the other children. When other children played on the ground, I looked at them standing alone because I didn't know how new friends were made. I don't know why, but I was afraid to talk to others, I was alone.

But thanks to God who gave me someone who is like my mother figure person in my life named Mother Mary. She is the only one who eradicates my loneliness with her motherly nature.

This orphanage belongs to Mother Mary, and she handles it with love and care.

There are 20-plus children in our orphanage in total. None of those children are my friends. Everyone is afraid or hates to come close to me except Mother Mary, I do not know the reason for this, but they say that I am a threat to them.

I always asked Mother Mary what my fault was, Why no one wants to come close to me?

Why doesn't anyone want to know me and come close to me, why doesn't anyone want to befriend me?

Am I so bad?

I was not always alone, I was not an orphan, I had my parents and a younger brother in my family.

But I do not know what happened 6 years ago due to which I am living alone in this orphanage here today.

Where is my mom, and dad, and how is my younger brother? I don't know!

All I remember is that we used to have a happy family. Where my parents used to treat me like a princess, and when I was 3 years old, then another new member came into our life. My younger brother

"Asher Moon"

Our life was going happily but On Asher's first birthday, we came to know that he had a serious lung disease. And he was battling for his every breath in this world. Every time we prayed to God and cried for his life, my little brother, at the age of 2, was suffering hard. I always tried my best to make my family happy and do everything perfectly.

I belong to a middle-class family, my father used to work in a bank. My dad was working day and night, working hard for his expensive treatment. We always needed a lot of money. In front of Asher, we tried our best to always look happy even if we were in pain. We always lived in fear that something should happen to him. If anything could have happened to him, we would not have even been able to live.

But now I have nothing in my life, neither my mother nor my father nor my younger brother.