suicide attempt

Sitting on the top edge of a building thinking of  different ways to kill myself. I have tried walking in front of a moving bus, stabbing my self with a knife, slitting my wrist,and countless other things, nothing seems to work, It really annoys me that each attempt I make I seem to survive. Why? Am I cursed?. I'm tired of living, the longer I leave the more my desire to die grows, the urge keeps increasing. What's the point in living when everyday is nothing but suffering, regret, broken hopes and dreams, torture. Haven't felt happiness in years, eachday is worse than the last.

Still sitting on the edge,i took a glass bottle from behind me and threw it down. It fell so far, it shattered into so many pieces. I looked down at the ground, gauging the height of the building and the sizes of the broken bottle pieces, it was nothing but powder. It's now or never,I thought getting up from my sitting position. I looked down at the ground, the building was really high up, I could barely see the ground. Should I jump? maybe I shouldn't, I contemplated. I closed my eyes stretching forward my left leg, when someone spoke." My, my. what do we have here? So you actually want to jump? I thought you were just trying to gain attention, like all those desperate girls, but damn this is worth every second".

I carefully turning to see a tall light skinned man, his skin looked pale, it looked like he had no blood flowing in his body. He looked in his early thirties, but had grey hair and black eyes. His pupil was big that looking into them felt like I was going to be sucked in. who is this man? I have never seen him before, I thought. But lord the man standing in front of me was gorgeous, he's well constructed jaw line, pointed nose, marble white teeth, his deep voice echoed in my mind. I think he is a psychopath, because any sane person wouldn't just stand and watch a girl stand on the edge of a building and Instead of bringing her down or talking her out of it, he is encouraging her. I felt my curiosity eating up inside so I asked,"Aren't you gonna try and stop me or something?".

"Nah.. what your doing is none of my business",he replied placing both his hands in his pocket. Before he placed his hands in his pocket, I caught a glimpse of his hand, his nails were painted black and they was some writings on his fingers

"why are you here then?" I asked carefully turning towards his direction, any wrong step and I'll fall back. I have never met this man nor have I seen him before, how did he know I was here. I come here so often but never have I seen him before. "my sixth sense told me I'd find some one here, so I came. I saw the throw the bottle, I thought you'd chicken out after seeing the outcome of the glass bottle. But then I saw you standing up, I wanted to see if you'd actually jump, but it turns out you've got balls. I wonder what life has done to you to make you want to take this step" he said with a quirky smile, staring right at me. Alot. Life has done a lot to me, at least I have someone who supports my decision even if it's not the best. I took a deep breath carefully turning around to face the other way. But then I had so much to ask him, his mysteriousness intrigued me. I wanted to ask who he was, how he knew about this place, i turned my head to ask but he wasn't there anymore. Honestly if it was before when i haven't seen enough of life, i would have been scared to the bone. i've seen a fair share of life, trying to find it's not a bed of roses. I closed my eyes, feeling the breeze pass through my hair, " They is no turning back",I said taking a step forward.