3 Chapter 3: I guess I'm a baby cultivator...

Babies are the worst. There I said it, after spending a week surrounded by crying and screaming babies where you are expected to sleep through the crying and the only thing you can do when awake is eat, cry, and have *ahem* uncontrollable bodily functions. This I can confidently say was the worst week in either of my two lives, but it is finally time to leave this godforsaken hell hole.

During the drive home, I look out the window and have my first view of the world I chose to live in. Well, more specifically one city that god decided I would be born into. The city around me isn't massive like my past worlds LA or Houston or New York, but it was still a proper city. With a population of around a million or so, if I had to guess based on the number of houses, apartments, and high rises we pasted while leaving the downtown area of the city. it seems the city is called "Lone Star City" based off of the street signs we pass on the highway. From those same signs, I can tell that we are not too far from Lander University with it being only 50 miles north of Lone Star City. I wasn't really sure why I chose to go to this world but I'm pretty sure it had something to do with lander so I guess I will be going there for college.

After about a 45-minute drive consisting of me looking around wide-eyed at everything, we passed trying to get a glimpse of a hero on duty surveying the city I was let down. For all, I can tell there were no superheroes on duty today and if there where they were in another part of the city or they were not fliers. As we pull up to a nice gated community I get the first look at the house I will be spending my next 18 years in. The house was on the larger side but not obnoxiously big, with two floors a detached 4 car garage and a fountain in the front that has a wrap-around driveway that reaches the front doors pathway and the garage the house is nice. All white exterior gives it a clean look and with large windows facing the front and back, it gives it an open and welcoming feeling. If I had to guess my parents were upper-middle or lower upper-class people, so they had enough money to be stable and not have to worry about it but not enough to be able to do nothing and blow money as if it grows on trees in the back yard.

When we enter the house we go to the second floor where my new nursery is located. In the room is a crib, a changing table, and ... not much else. its a room for a baby, how much stuff could I need? After feeding me my parents leave the room so I can nap and so they can do what they need to do. Taking advantage of this time I go ahead and look at the Qi cultivation technique I was given, opening a part of memories I see in my mind's eye a technique called "Qi cultivation for the lazy and dumb." A little pissed at the implied insult I try to throw a tantrum but since I am a week old I don't really have the muscles required to throw a proper fit. So giving up and accepting the fact that Qi cultivation isn't my main goal and only truly there as a support function I open the technique. inside I see...

"Qi Cultivation for the lazy and dumb" stages

1st stage Has enough qi to increase or decrease gravity on self by 0.5x

2nd stage Has enough qi to increase or decrease gravity on self by 1.5x

3rd stage Remove impurities from the skin, can block telepathy of an average telepath,

increase life span by 50 years, can learn to fly using qi

4th stage Has enough qi to increase or decrease gravity on self by 2.5x

5th stage Has enough qi to increase or decrease gravity on self by 5x

6th stage Remove impurities from muscles, can block telepathy from an advance telepath,

and increases life span by 500 years. Allows access to "pocket" or personal space

to store items(non-living)

7th stage Has enough qi to increase or decrease gravity on self by 10x

8th stage Has enough qi to increase or decrease gravity on self by 15x

9th stage Removes impurities from bones and organs, increases life span by ???

How to cultivate "Qi cultivation for the lazy and dumb" you idiot.

first, absorb Qi or spiritual energy from the world around you and store it in your dantian. before you ask, you idiot sandwich your dantian is located in the middle of your chest below the sternum. you will feel it when you start to absorb Qi after you have absorbed 100 specs of Qi you will condense it into a "liquid" in your dantian. You will repeat this process for every stage and will get the rewards of that stage immediately after condensing your Qi. Please note you dote that you will not be in the first stage until after you have successfully condensed your first 100 Qi, so don't go throwing a tantrum if after you have absorbed some Qi you cant immediately effect the gravity being applied to yourself.

Looking at the Cultivation I feel both insulted and thankful, while this technique won't make me incredibly overpowered as it does not allow me to effect the gravity around me and in certain locations like someone with gravity powers would it does allow me to increase the difficulty of my future training. I can also use the gravity increase like rock lees ankle weights allowing me constantly train and have that badass rock lee drop weights moment in naruto during the chunin exams. except I guess no one will be able to tell I turned off the gravity on me except for the increase in speed since there is no visual effect. so thinking about it isn't as cool but it is still cool to me and that's all that matters.

Forgetting I am a baby I try to get up into a lotus pose to cultivate but I fail miserable so I simply sigh close my eyes and try to sense the Qi around me and what I sense makes me sigh again. There is very little Qi in the air and what Qi there is moves very slow when I try to absorb it. I can instantly tell that this process is going to take a long time, well good thing I didn't want to be a Qi cultivator because if I did there is no way I would be able to be a superhero or strong enough to pass the hero training course at lander. Deciding that there is no point in procrastinating this lengthy process I begin my journey as the WORLDS FIRST BABY CULTIVATOR!

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