AFFRIGHTED.

Adora's pov.

It had been exactly fourteen hours since Tony and I had talked, and my day had just continued to worsen after that, he was like a curse.

We were to set off early the next day and there was apparently nothing I could do to change my situation if I still wanted to keep my job, at least that's how it sounded like when I had barged inside Rico's office, our supervisor, and demanded to have a quick chat with him, I had questions that needed immediate explained answers and my anxiety wasn't helping.

Missions were cautiously planned, especially these kinds of missions, you didn't just ambush an agent in the middle of the night and gave them stupid orders, with no explanations whatsoever and only a day to prepare and set out for a case that had no in-depth details attached to it, I mean what the heck did he think we were 'miracle workers or something? And he didn't even have the nerve to tell me this himself, considering I was the leader here, coward, all the lazy piece of shit had to say was,

" I am sorry you feel that way Adora but there is no one better than you in the field, you have an incredible sense of smell and vision which makes you our best tracker, your strength and healing process is by far unmatched, hell I've never seen you hurt before, you are a quick and critical thinker and your lack of emotions makes you stand out the most, minus anger of course, which makes you our perfect candidate, you were born for jobs like this, and if you can't do it then I really don't see what else you'll be able to in this agency then."

"I don't deal with dead bodies Rico, and you know that, you're overstepping a boundary here." I spat out at him angrily, it was the only request I'd ever made ever since I joined the agency, and they had fully agreed to it, saying that my skills were much better used in tracking and analyzing, and how I shouldn't worry about handling anything I wasn't comfortable with, Oh the irony!

"Well, Adora miss, this agency doesn't happen to revolve around you, you are an agent, a field one at that, the agency doesn't owe you an explanation it's the other way round, so please suck it up and do your fucking job, or you could always work somewhere else, you're not our best asset you know, you are so easily replaceable."

I wasn't even shocked, no I was angry, he had just threatened to strip me off what I had worked very hard to achieve, the only thing that still kept me sane all these years and he had threatened to take it away from me just like that, I never spoke back, no I did something even better, I smiled sweetly before punching him straight in his worthless gut catching him off guard and sent him flying backwards landing on the foot of his stupid table and then I did the most childish thing ever, I spat on his pretty face and flipped him a bird, now I was done. I had then calmly walked out of the agency building and began jogging home a little less angry, I wasn't worried about Rico I knew he would have healed by the time I got home' I hadn't even used five percent of my strength on him, he wasn't worth it, he was a weakling and a pathetic coward, a common combination.

My mind was racing, I didn't know why this mission made me so anxious, I didn't like dead bodies, matter of fact I never even got near them, I only sniffed them out and let the others deal with the rest, I paced all around my room, I could feel my skin itching as I tried to draw out every possible outcome of tomorrow's job but nothing seemed to make any sense at the moment. I hated surprises, I loathed not knowing what I was dealing with therefore not knowing what outcome to expect, I knew I could handle it that didn't bother me even a little bit being possibly the strongest were in existence, what bothered me was the how? I was afraid of my own strength and capabilities, I was afraid of losing control of my own body and mind, of losing to the unknown and waking up years later in a deep state of regret and confusion, of waking up completely alone, I was deeply scared of who I truly was. I knew however that I was never going to be that fifteen-year-old again, we were better now Vona and I, we had worked so hard and come so far, we weren't there yet but we were far much better than before, and that's all that mattered, we were trying, but what if it still wasn't enough?

I quietly stood up and went so sit by the mirror, it had been so long since I had truly looked at myself and not be afraid of the image staring right back at me.

My eyes were shut closed, and I could hear Vona's voice, whispering calmly that it was ok, she knew how I felt, because she felt it too, we were one after all. I took in really deep breaths before I finally opened one eye and slowly followed with the other.

I looked at myself, my black midnight eye's just like my wolf's staring back at me kindly, and I felt my eyes get wet, my brown skin looked soft and clear, my wild hair stuck all over my face but I didn't bother to brush it out this time, it was more white than red and it made me stick out all of the time, Everyone who knew or saw me always assumed it was dyed and I never bothered to correct them.

My hair always had a personality of its own, the white that covered most of my head was much wilder, just like my pops had been, I could feel my eyes begin to get wet just at the memory of him, it had been so long since I'd thought of him, of any of them. I raised my hand and began playing with the fallen strands absent mindedly as I let that one memory replay itself in my mind, as I imagined myself a happy10 year old again.

"Papaya, will you ever tie your hair?'' I asked my dad curiously, feeling envious of his long and curly pure white hair floating freely in the wind as I watched him train in our backyard, I wanted to have what he had.

"Nai mami, my hair is a wild one, just like you angel, how would you feel if I were to cage you, my love?" He answered, turning his attention fully to me, with a wide smile on his face, and I couldn't help but roll my eyes at his answer, it was always the same every time, what did I expect.

"Well, why do you always let mummy tie my hair then, is it not wild enough to be free, I don't like brown hair too papa, I dislike brunettes, I just want to wear my natural color again, it is way prettier right?" I questioned pouting my lips at him and giving what I perceived as my adorable puppy eyes that I knew he could never resist, I really hated that my hair had to be dyed so that I could 'fit' in with the other werewolves, I knew I wasn't a natural red head like my mum was and it wasn't like my father's either, but my hair was really beautiful and I just couldn't understand the need to hide it then.

"Hey, hey, now my love that is not a good thing to say about people," He answered coming towards me in a lightning speed and playfully tackling me to the ground, as he began tickling me making me laugh till my tummy hurt, he then carried me in his strong arms, looked me directly in the eye and said, "You will soon be able to wear your natural color love, and your hair will get to be as wild as you would like, just a little patience love, and you will get to do anything you like, I promise, ok?"

"Pinky swear." I knew he would never lie to me, but I needed the extra re assurance, "Pinky swear mami" and he held out his large pinky finger, entangling it with my small delicate one, while looking directly at my eyes with his intense coffee black ones that were filled with nothing but pure love for me,

"As long as you promise, you'll be a little patient." "I will" I affirmed confidently "I love you papaya."

"I love you the most, little bean." and it was one of the promises I never broke, I was patient.

It was disheartening how I always forgot that I was once a happy child, and I had parents who would have died for me, it had been so long sine I'd felt anything other than anger and loneliness, every time I looked at myself in the mirror, all I saw was a broken girl, who'd broken so many more in her thirst for vengeance and in her quest for healing, I saw a monster who resembled her papaya, they had loved me with everything they had had, and I had loved my parents too just as much if not more, If only I could...........

The vibration sound of my phone brought me back to reality, my face was all wet and my top was drenched with my tears, I quickly wiped my face off with the back of my hands and got up to recollect myself. It had been so long since I'd let myself feel any kind of emotions and now that I had, I didn't know if it was a good thing or not, I did feel a little lighter inside, just a tiny bit, but I knew that I could never let it happen again, especially not now, this was not the time to be weak. I picked up my phone to read the received text and my heart sank a little farther.

"Three more rogues were found dead Adora, we'd have to leave much earlier than expected, I'll pick you up, car or bike?" It was from Tony of course, the recent proclaimed bearer of bad news.

"What do you think dumbo?" I texted back rolling my eyes at his stupid question, of course the car was much more relevant.

"Thanks for offering." I quickly pressed send before I could think of deleting it, and now to partially forget whatever had happened in the last fourteen hours, I decided to take the only drug I knew I could rely on, running, and so I stripped naked, shifted and headed out towards the forest, to let it all go, and I did, at least for now.