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Creepy Pharmacist: All My Patients Are Horrific

[This world is steeped in mystique.] [Vampires, werewolves, technology, magical potions, ghosts, bioengineered beings, divination, and puppets; every terrifying element you could conceive of, exists in this world.] [One must carry a lantern when stepping outside.] [One must never wander far.] [Ten meters beyond the gates, darkness will consume you.] [Whether attending to humans, ghosts, or stitched monsters, one must maintain composure at all times.] [Should you ever lose your composure, it will give rise to malicious intent.] This is the translation of the Chinese novel "Creepy Pharmacist: All My Patients Are Horrific". It's a horror comedy with more comedy than horror. I hope you enjoy it.

Fish9527 · Book&Literature
Not enough ratings
85 Chs

Saving a Fortune on Lighting Costs

Could it be...

His expression became stagnant. And at the next moment, Lynne, with a cheerful smile, came out from the backyard holding several high-grade recovery potions.

"Sir, one bottle for 200 skull coins, no surgery needed. After taking it, it's guaranteed to make you feel invigorated, hehe—"

Bang—

A bullet whizzed past, grazing Lynne's ear.

Lynne: "???!"

The demon hunter stepped forward instantly, grabbing Lynne by the collar, his teeth clenched: "Crafty boy, you played innocent pretty well! I never would've thought, you provided the potion to that baldy?!"

Lynne, with a bewildered face, said: "What potion? I don't understand?"

The demon hunter instantly exploded with anger, saying: "You still play dumb?! I saw that baldy taking a potion before our duel, and the bottle of that potion is identical to the one on your table!!"

Lynneヾ(゚д゚)ノ.

Lynne cleared his throat, realizing that his secret was out, he stopped pretending, and curiously asked: "The baldy you mentioned... is he a black knight riding a war horse?"

The demon hunter, gripping his collar(〝▼皿▼), said: "What do you think?!"

Lynne closed his eyes, very calm, a smile appearing on his face, saying: "I see. A few hours ago, that customer did come to my shop and purchased a batch of potions, spending a hefty sum! He contributed quite a lot to my small shop's revenue! Hehe—"

Polite yet earnest. He completely regarded himself as an outsider.

The demon hunter ground his teeth, his eyes flickering, saying: "What potion did you give him?"

Seeing a sales opportunity, a professional smile instantly appeared on Lynne's face, saying: "Our store's newest product, the Critical Strike Potion! It can greatly enhance your combat abilities! Good quality and reasonable price, absolutely the essential choice for getting the upper hand! Trust me! You can't buy this outside!"

Lynne adjusted his monocle, his expression serious.

The demon hunter, with a sinister voice, said: "You actually assist a creature of darkness against your own kind?!"

Lynne decisively extended his hand, speaking earnestly: "Please do not make subjective assumptions, sir. First, I didn't know about your relationship; second, he came here seeking potent potions and was very generous, I had no reason to turn him away."

"Third." Lynne, with his eyes closed, raised three fingers. "My shop is open to all friendly customers. If he can buy this potion to deal with you, similarly, you can also buy this potion from me to deal with him!"

Lynne looked seriously at the demon hunter in front of him, his gaze sincere and moving. "Out of kinship, I can even give you a 20% discount!"

"..."

"..."

A moment of silence.

The demon hunter narrowed his eyes and said, "How much?"

Lynne earnestly raised two fingers, "2000 skull coins per unit! But considering you're my kind and a regular customer, I can give you a 20% discount, selling it to you for 1600 coins per bottle, practically a bankruptcy price!"

The demon hunter's eyes flickered, and after pondering for a while, he hesitated: "Or I could kill you now, rob your shop, that's also an option..."

Lynne closed his eyes, shaking his head: "Sir, we are of the same kind! We depend on parents at home, and on our kinsmen outside. Our relationship is not just as parents, it's more than that. It's the emotion flowing in the blood! And besides, I even gave you a discount..." Lynne was sorrowful.

The demon hunter's whole body was covered in goosebumps. He realized that in just one day, this kid's ability to disgust people had seen a massive increase.

"Enough with the nonsense!" The demon hunter clenched his teeth, massaging his temples, "However much that baldy bought, give me the same! Money is not an issue!"

"Alright!" Lynne was instantly overjoyed.

Ten minutes later.

[Ding! You have completed the task: Treat the Demon Hunter's wounds, and you receive rewards: Skull Coin +200, Experience +300, Demon Hunter Favorability +20]

"It's already prepared!"

Accompanying the system prompt, Lynne, with a smile on his face, placed the freshly made 10 bottles of Critical Strike Potion on the counter.

"Ten potions in total are 16,000 coins, or 16 black skull coins, plus six regular recovery potions for 300 coins, and two superior recovery potions for 600 coins, making a total of 16,900 coins. I'll round it to 17,000 coins for you. Thank you for your patronage!"

Lynne bowed deeply at ninety degrees.

The demon hunter, clenching his teeth, rustled through his money bag, pulling out money. He didn't know why he just always felt that this guy was trying to scam him cleverly.

After paying the money, he looked doubtfully at the potion in his hand and said: "If I drink this, will I really go bald?"

To be honest, he was somewhat reluctant. Because his glossy, black, and beautiful hair took many years to maintain.

Lynne earnestly said: "Going bald is a small matter, being strong is a lifetime matter. And it's just hair! If you lose it, you can come to my shop, and I can do a transplant for you!"

Lynne suddenly thought of a good industrial chain. Critical Strike Potion + hair transplant services = a continuous stream of money.

The demon hunter hesitated. But thinking about how he almost died at the hands of that black knight, who was far less powerful than himself, he felt choked up.

If going bald really could make one stronger, then it seemed it might not be an entirely unacceptable thing. Thinking of this, he popped the cork with a snap. And drained the potion in his hand.

Hum——

Instantly, red lights flickered all over his body. He was astonished, and then immediately felt an indescribable power surging through his body.

"This...this is..." He was astounded, breathing rapidly.

Boom, a loud noise.

Under that enormous power, his clothes burst open, exposing his explosive muscles. He could clearly feel the huge amplification in his body! It was unimaginable! At this moment, he finally realized the revolutionary level of this potion, and compared to going bald, it was absolutely worth it!

A breeze whooshed by.

Under Lynne's watchful eyes, his glossy, beautiful black hair was suddenly blown away by the wind.

Ding——

A ray of light immediately flashed from his shiny, bald forehead.

Lynne: "Pfft——"

But he held back and did not laugh out loud. Because he knew laughing would be death. But it was still hard to hold back. Because the one in front of him was obviously rounder and shinier than the previous one!

The demon hunter turned around, looking at his shiny bald head in the mirror, murmuring: "I'm bald... and also stronger?"

Ding——

A flash of light jutted from his forehead.

"..."

Looking at the demon hunter's stunned expression, Lynne patted his shoulder and consoled: "Sir, this is actually a good thing. Think about it, when you go out in the future, it's like you come with your own light source. This also saves you a considerable amount of lighting costs, doesn't it?"

It made sense what he said. But he didn't know why there was just an urge to get rid of this human kid.