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Creepy Pharmacist: All My Patients Are Horrific

[This world is steeped in mystique.] [Vampires, werewolves, technology, magical potions, ghosts, bioengineered beings, divination, and puppets; every terrifying element you could conceive of, exists in this world.] [One must carry a lantern when stepping outside.] [One must never wander far.] [Ten meters beyond the gates, darkness will consume you.] [Whether attending to humans, ghosts, or stitched monsters, one must maintain composure at all times.] [Should you ever lose your composure, it will give rise to malicious intent.] This is the translation of the Chinese novel "Creepy Pharmacist: All My Patients Are Horrific". It's a horror comedy with more comedy than horror. I hope you enjoy it.

Fish9527 · Book&Literature
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100 Chs

About to Break

The fairy Yoyo, cradling the compass, sincerely said to Lynne, "Boss, you truly are a kind-hearted outsider. You're the first person I've encountered who hasn't thought of drugging me and taking advantage. I consider you a dear friend!"

[Ding! Trust level of Yoyo +30]

[Ding! Favorability level of Yoyo +30.]

Lynne: "…"

For some reason, hearing those notifications didn't make him happy. Instead, a sense of guilt welled up within him. Indeed, he might be morally corrupted.

Lynne massaged his temple, saying, "Since we're such dear friends, let me kindly remind you: those who claim they're not bad people might not necessarily be good. Those who say they won't deceive you might not be trustworthy. Don't eat anything given by strangers, never turn your back on them, and don't go home with them. Remember these rules, and you'll fare well on your journey."

Click—

Yoyo adjusted her knight's helmet, responding earnestly, "Your advice is genuine, I'll remember it koli."

[Ding! Trust level of Yoyo +10]

[Ding! Favorability level of Yoyo +20.]

Lynne: "…"

Clearly, she hadn't taken it to heart. But considering she traveled two thousand li without dying, she must have her own means of survival. Enough of this. Their fleeting encounter was just that. His goodwill had its limits.

Lynne's gaze returned to her arm. Once the blood was cleaned off, the gruesome, torn wound was evident. It looked as though some creature had bitten off her entire arm. Horrifying.

"How did you get this injury?" Lynne inquired curiously.

Yoyo, with closed eyes, replied, "During my adventure, I encountered a massive giant. I approached to ask for directions, but the giant tried to bite me. If not for my swift dodge, it wouldn't have been just my arm; it would've been my head. He's a creature far more powerful than I am. I stood no chance against him koli."

Click—

The visor of her knight's helmet dropped again, covering her face.

Lynne was rendered speechless.

"Alright then." Lynne closed his eyes, donning his mask and gloves, remarking, "Judging by your wound, you've administered preliminary first aid. However, to prevent infections, further wound cleaning is essential. First, remove your armor. I need to conduct a brief clinical check."

Click—

Yoyo raised her knight's visor, firmly stating, "Refuse. A knight never removes her armor koli!"

Lynne shrugged, "Alright, suit yourself. Do you want an anesthetic? Just a heads-up, it's going to be excruciating without it."

Lifting her visor earnestly, Yoyo said, "Refuse! Anesthetics will only impair a knight's reaction time. Plus, my pain tolerance is at its maximum! It's the result of a knight's rigorous training koli!"

Lynne remarked, "Impressive! You're the second bravest person I've encountered."

...

A few minutes later. In front of the operating table.

The fairy Yoyo lay flat, intently watching Lynne who held two scalpels in hand.

"Ready when you are! I am now at your mercy!"

Lynne rubbed his temple in exasperation. This fairy had a knack for making serious, yet odd statements. His expression grew stern, warning, "If you can't bear it, shout. Don't bite your tongue off. I'm making the incision now!"

Ding—

A cold gleam flashed from Lynne's scalpel.

Yoyo, with eyes closed, declared, "As I've said, my pain tolerance is maxed out! My resilience attribute is fully leveled up. I won't..."

Shiink—

"Kooooooli!!!"

With a single cut, Yoyo's pupils dilated, and she let out a sudden, ear-piercing scream.

Shiink—

"Ouch! Ouch!"

The fairy named Yoyo immediately sat upright. Tears streamed down from beneath her knight's helmet. Holding half her body, she (≧口≦) swayed and wailed, "Why does your incision hurt so much more than others?! Did you use some weird tool that adds extra pain?!"

Lynne sighed, "Let's use the anesthetic."

"Refuse." Yoyo lay down again, tears still streaming, biting her lip, "My pain resistance is maxed out. Knights possess the quality of endurance. I won't..."

Shiink—

"Ow!"

Shiink—

"Yame! Yame!"

Shiink—

"Ouch! Gentle! You're pressing too hard! Koli!"

[Knife Skill +1]

[Knife Skill +1]

"You said your pain resistance was maxed, right?! Don't squirm! If you do, I might cut elsewhere!"

"But, but! Even though my resistance is maxed, every cut breaks the threshold of pain!"

Shiink—

"Ahhhhh! I'm tearing apart! Yoyo's tearing apart o(≧口≦)o! I'm breaking!"

"Don't make such weird noises (*`皿´*)ノ! It's just a few scrapes!"

[Knife Skill +1]

[Knife Skill +1]

"Yada yada yada! You hurt me! The great knight is going to die from pain! Help! Help! I'm being torn apart! I want to go home! I don't want this anymore! Wah! I'll bite you! I'll bite you koli!"

Yoyo screamed, baring her sharp teeth, preparing to fiercely bite down on Lynne's arm. Evidently, under such intense pain, even the mighty knight commander was on the verge of losing her sanity.

Lynne was getting desperate. While trying to hold down Yoyo's head, which was snapping wildly with her teeth, he continued cleaning her wound with the other hand. Finally, to complete the last part of the treatment...

Lynne quickly grabbed a rolling pin from nearby and, in the instant that the fairy named Yoyo opened her mouth,

Shiink—

He shoved it in, effectively blocking those sharp teeth.

"Mmph—~~"

Yoyo, with widened eyes full of surprise, struggled vehemently.

"(`皿′) Bite down on it, just hold on a bit longer! We're almost done! Hang in there!"

Ten minutes later.

[Ding! Your knife skill has successfully reached the intermediate level, granting you 300 experience.]

[Ding! Your surgical skill has reached the intermediate level, granting you 300 experience.]

Yoyo lay on the operating table with a buzzing head, her dark eyes staring blankly. She was completely drained, her whole body wet from the sweat caused by the intense pain.

Thump—

Lynne removed the rolling pin, which had been placed in her mouth to prevent her from biting off her tongue.

He took off his gloves with satisfaction, "The initial wound cleaning is done. You can get up now. We can proceed to the next step."

Yoyo slowly sat up, her gaze empty. She shook her head, still wearing her knight's helmet, rubbing her eyes, "It felt like a nightmare... I was close to... breaking..."

Lynne, cleaning up the spilled blood, said, "That's a normal reaction."

Staring at the freshly cleaned wound on her shoulder, Yoyo shook her head and looked intently at Lynne, pointing at him, "You're the first man to hurt me this much. You've made quite an impression on me."

[Ding! Yoyo's Favorability towards you +20]

Lynne: "???"

She stepped off the operating table, squinting, and picked up the thick rolling pin. Observing the teeth marks on it, she said with a sly grin, "You're also the first man to shove something so large into my mouth!"