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Congratulations, You're Dead!

*Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding* *Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding* *Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding* "Uh, whatcha doing there System-chan?" *Ding**Ding**Ding**Ding* "You know they can't understand you right?" *Ding*

Farmer_Rebellion · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
37 Chs

#18

"The Capital, Finally." Amelia breathes a sigh of relief.

"And the line is only a kilometer long." Apricot exaggerates. "We should celebrate! Maybe with a new movie?" She asks hopefully.

"Hahaha. You know there's only so many Tinkerbell shows, right? You're going to run out eventually." I tell the tiny movie addict.

"But you've got other stuff right? I really like these cartoon things. Are there any others with pixies in them?"

"A few." I nod. "Tinkerbell is the only one with a Fae as a main character, though. The rest usually have pixies as side characters, or plot points at best. Most are made out to be human sized too; we didn't know any real pixies back there."

"That's obvious." She snorts. "But they're still fun. Can I please get just one more?"

"Oh fine, how about Pinocchio?" I conjure an image of Gepetto carving the famous marionette while a translucent Blue 'Pixie' flies over head. "It has an old wood carver, Gepetto, that makes a puppet and wishes it could be a real boy. The Blue Pixie then comes in the night to grant his wish and animate the puppet. Pinocchio must then prove his worth to earn a real body. Sound good?" I would have started with Snow White, but I don't want to offend any actual dwarves that we might pass by in the city.

"Looks alright." She shrugs. "Your people may be weird, but they came up with some crazy stories."

"Oh, you haven't seen anything yet. Just be glad that I used to watch a lot of cartoons, and that my little sister went through a big pixie phase." I start the film as we join the end of the Queue.

Amelia's Parents join us in the vardo while we wait. They've seen the movies I've made for Apricot and were quite surprised by them. But, I just told them I was practicing my magic by retelling old stories to keep her amused. I even showed them the flip-book butt-wipes I made for Charlie, that got a laugh out of Turner.

We're through the line before the movie is even half over, and apparently as Awakened we could have skipped it entirely. I just wave it away as one of the guards start giggling as Pinocchio falls down the steps. Another seems very interested in us, likely having been ordered to keep an eye out for the people who found the dungeon.

"You feeling okay?" Amelia asks me as we follow her parent's carriage to their new home. "It's a bit hectic after being on the road all this time."

"I'm fine." I nod, my eyes tracking everything they can. "The crowds are not that bad. I'm just feeling a bit claustrophobic I suppose. Got so used to keeping a sensory net up around us at Circle Orchard that I've been using one since we left. Pulled it in to pass through the gates, don't want to trip any magical alarms."

"Well, let it back out, at least a bit, you're scaring me right now." She squeezes my leg. "I'm sure they can differentiate between a scanning spell and something more offensive."

"Yeah, you're probably right." I take a deep breath. "Maybe just a fifty meter radius." I let out a deep sigh as my various magical senses come back to me. "Ah, that is so much better, I really didn't think it would affect me that bad. It's gotten so I barely notice it anymore, but not knowing what's going on all around me really freaked me out."

"I don't know how you kept it going all that time, just using the fog spell for a couple hours drove me nuts." She leans in close as I revel in the return of my senses.

"That's one of my least favorite ones too." I nod, my eyes closed as I add it in, then a few more. "It's good for a lot of detail, but it can get overwhelming."

"Uh huh, and that's why I can sense you so clearly not using it right now as we move down a busy city street." Amelia says, her voice laden with sarcasm.

"Heh, you caught me." I put my arm around this beautiful woman that's willing to put up with my silliness. "I may still have some unresolved trauma from before. I try not to think about it, but I guess the compulsive need to keep track of everything in a kilometer circle around me... Well, it's probably a bit of a clue that I'm not over it."

"Oh, babe." She hugs me back. "You cover this whole damned city if you need to, we'll deal with anyone that has a problem with it."

"It's not that bad." I try to re-assure her. "Now that I'm aware of the problem, I can work to rectify it. It just took me by surprise is all." I sound calm, but my face is stiff as I run all my sensory spells at maximum in this hundred meter circle I've given myself. And, even try to work out a couple more.

"Babe." She breathes out, her voice full of love, but still a bit exasperated.

"I know, I know." I cut her off. "I've got you, and I'm safe. We're safe..." My eyes start to water. "I really will be okay." Another deep breath, and I start lowering the intensity.

"I love you, you goof. But, no more closing down like that, please." She begs. "If you have a problem, let me know. That's good, just keep taking those deep breaths." She helps talk me down from the panic attack. "There you go, just let it flow out of you. There goes the fog, and what was that new one?" She knows I can't help but be distracted by new magic.

"Tracking people by heart-rate and blood pressure to see if they were stressed out without showing it. Like if they were planning an attack, or something." I keep taking slow, deep breaths, holding them in and then releasing a different spell as I exhale each one. "Thanks. I'm back down to just the air spells I usually use. I love you too." My breathing goes back to normal.

"I'm sorry, this whole thing was my fault. I was so caught up with my parents, it can't have been easy for you to-"

"Stop!" I snap out harsher than I meant to. "Sorry." I lower my voice. "This is not your fault. You are allowed to grieve with your parents. I didn't even realize this was an issue until it happened."

"It's not yours either." She tells me seriously. "You told me yourself that people don't just get over trauma, and you went through something that hurt me just to hear about. The fact that you came through it as well as you did is a miracle. So what if you're a little paranoid? Now that we're both aware of the problem, we can keep an eye on it and make sure it doesn't get out of control. Or branch out into other problems."

"You okay there lunker?" Apricot comes floating over to land on my knee.

"Shit! Sorry, I dropped the movie." I spurt out.

"I'm the one that needs to apologize." She holds up a hand, signaling me to stop. "It's my fault you had to stay there and derail your plans. You wouldn't be going through this if I hadn't planned that ambush."

"Oh, Apricot." Amelia reaches out like she wants to hug the tiny woman. "Babe." She turns to me. "Can you do the thing we were talking about?" She practically begs.

"Yeah, but I won't be able to hold it for long." I nod to her before looking back to the pixie, our pixie. "Don't freak out. But, I think someone needs to give you a hug. Embiggen!" It's a perfectly cromulent name for a spell.

I'm not actually making her bigger, but mapping all her senses and movement into a human sized shell which cradles her real body inside. This is actually a lot harder than it sounds, since humans have more than just the five basic senses everyone talks about, and pixies even more so. Made even worse because I've only had a couple practice attempts on the cat, and one on Amelia. Though, in her case, I just made her a second body, not a giant.

I need to use a mixture of all the different magics I've mastered, and then some. They swiftly coalesce into a glowing shape before it seems to compress. And with a small "eek" Apricot is now sitting on my lap, she'd be a few centimeters shorter than Amelia if she were standing up. I left her wings immaterial to all but the wind, or they'd just get in the way. And, boy am I glad I did that one test with Amelia, otherwise she would have popped up quite naked.

Amelia doesn't waste any time, and while the supersized pixie is still looking around trying to get her bearings, she's taken up into a tight bear hug. "We've long since forgiven you Apricot. We love you."

"We do." Is all I'm able to get out before losing the spell. "Sorry, pixie senses are a bit harder to remap than humans."

"What?" That seems to be all she can say as she catches herself mid-air. "Was that real? Is that what you feel like all the time? There was so much weight and momentum to even the smallest movements." Her eyes are so wide, that even without the magnify spell I can clearly see her surprise. "And, that hug... Dammit guys, I'm gonna cry." She flies of into her house, sparkles trailing behind as she goes.

"We really do love you Apricot" I call after her retreating form. We three had become friends over the weeks spent at Circle Orchard, and the bond they share just brought us that much closer. She's pretty much family at this point.

A loud honking sound comes from inside Apricot's little house, causing Amelia to titter. "And, here I thought I was loud when I blew my nose."

This gets a muffled "Shut it, you bloody lunker" from the tiny woman, in between sniffles.

"Sorry, I shouldn't tease. But, that's what you do to family, silly." Amelia shares my sentiment with our little winged companion. "And, am I back to lunker now? What happened to goddess?"

"Be nice." I squeeze the blonde "goddess'" hand. "People say silly stuff when they're desperate."

"Stuff like "Pixie up and fucking take it", you mean?" She squeezes back, a glint in her eye.

"Never gonna live that down. Am I?" I mutter. "Oh look, I think we're almost there." I change the subject as we turn onto a side street.

"No, but you can live up to that night any time you want to." She breathes into my ear.

"Nice place." I say after taking a deep breath. Trying to convince myself that it's not a good idea to jump her in the middle of a public street, just meters away from her parents. "This street wouldn't look out of place back where I came from. Remember that *England* place from Peter Pan? a lot of people there live in homes just like this"

"Spoil-sport." She breaths back before giving me enough space to regain my capability for higher thought. "Yeah, Daddy said it was off one of the main streets, but far enough back that noise wasn't an issue."

The street is filled with rows of semi-detached houses that could have come from modern day Britain. They're made from magically fused stone though, instead of brick. And, instead of garages with rooms over top, there's just an archway that leads to a shared courtyard. These are mostly filled with container gardens and a few sheds, but there's a few places with carriages. No horses though. Making me think there must be a nearby stable that houses them.

"You lunkers are weird." Apricot says, practically daring Amelia to comment, after she rejoins us to look at the neighborhood. "All these giant boxes, each just like the next. At least Sorrel puts some effort into his buildings. Even when his were the same, they were still different. Some decent gardens, though. I guess." She adds that last bit seeming like she felt obligated to say something nice about the street.

"Look they're stopping."

Amelia's parent's get out and walk over to us. "There it is, we're in the left side." Turner gestures to one of the homes on the right half of the street. "I don't think your wagon is going to fit through the archway though." He adds with an apologetic tone.

"That's alright." I say. "I was going to store it in my inventory anyways, just need to pack up all our stuff first."

"The whole thing?" Kaitlyn's eyes widen. "Just how big is that inventory thing you all have?"

"Heheh." I laugh. "It's not that big. Not right now, at least. Temmie-chan gives us more spaces and makes them able to hold more each time we level. I was going to shrink the vardo down before storing it. It's mostly empty space, after all."

"Well, that makes a bit more sense. But still, you're both practically walking warehouses. Just how much stuff are you carrying around all the time?"

"I'm about half full with wipes for Charlie, the rest is plants, crafting supplies, and a few odds and ends. Amelia carries most of our food stuffs. Pretty sure she's got at least two cows worth of meat in there, some pigs, and goats, plus a bunch of birds and game we hunted along the way." I rub my little carnivore on the head.

"And all my clothes." She adds.

"And all her clothes."

"Hah!" Turner barks out a laugh. "Meats and sweets, that's all she would ever eat as a kid too."

"I liked bread too." She sulks. Which just makes us all laugh.

"So, should we check out the house first?" I ask.

"Oh, I'll need to air it out first." Amelia's mother insists. "Why don't you unhitch the horse so Holt can take them all down to the stables. I'm sure he wants to get home and see his family too."

"Ma'am.. Kaitlyn." He corrects himself after seeing the look on her face. "The only reason we can afford an apartment in the city is because of you and Turner. You ever need me for anything, you don't even have to ask." That was the longest speech I've heard from the man since we met. After which he just takes the horses and walks off down the street.

"That man..." Kaitlyn says under her breath before turning to us. "Amy girl, you come help me and your father with the house." She grabs her daughter with one hand and her husband with the other, and starts towing them both into the house.

"Hey, Apricot. Wanna help me get a little revenge." A wicked smile covers my face as I hold out my hand and will some of my tendril tattoos to life.

"Oh, you wicked, wicked man." She flies right down to me. "It'd be a pleasure." She says, quite literally.

Amelia gasps, and almost trips. She then looks back to see what's going on with her bond only to see me waving back at her with an innocent smile on my face. And, a not-so-innocent pixie held up in my other hand.

"Mmm, thank you for that. But you know she's going to pay us back even worse for it later."

"One can only hope." I say before heading to the back of the wagon to start packing everything up.

"Mind restarting the movie for me? Just from when he was on the stage is fine." She's hovering lazily around me as I work.

"Sure." I agree readily. "I'll even throw in an extra one since it got interrupted. It's just a short one, so it won't be too bad." Figure I'll stick with the Disney theme and give her Dumbo next.

"I'm not gonna say no, but it really wasn't your fault."

"It'll make me feel better to do this for you. It's by the same company that made Pinocchio and Peter Pan too. They made a lot of popular cartoons."

"Well, if it'll make you feel better..."

"I love you, you silly little pixie." I blow a kiss at her and restart the movie.

"You too, lunker. Now hush, movie's playing." She tries to downplay it, but she really does care.

It doesn't take me long, and Pinocchio's just getting locked in the cage by the time I'm done. Apricot is so wrapped up in his plight that she doesn't even notice me moving her, Mittens, and the cushion they're sitting on outside, so I can shrink the wagon.

Taking out my staff to help with the complexity of all the carvings. I slowly shift the excess wood to fill the void in the middle, as I bring it down to under half a meter in length. This is the limit of my current inventory space. I have to cheat a little and make the wheels solid and add a bit of thickness to the undercarriage. But it still looks alright, fully functional too.

Pinocchio's just grown donkey ears and is diving off the cliff by the time I finish. I could have gone faster, but not while translating a movie. I actually thought it would take me longer, I really should use my staff more often. I've gotten too used to just taking it out for the big stuff.

"It's so tiny, I love it." Amelia comes running up once she sees I'm done. "Oof!" She tries pushing it, only to find it much heavier than she thought.

"Careful there, it still weighs as much as before." I walk up and help her get it rolling. "It's pretty much a solid log now. Let me guess. You want a new model at this size?"

"Ooh, yes!" She bounces up and down in joy at the idea. "Please." She begs, and pulls out the old one setting it on top of the shrunken vardo.

"Sure, it won't take me nearly as long to copy it as to shrink the real thing." I toss out a chunk of the original tree and a bundle of linen. Five minutes later and she's having me tow her up to the house in her new toy, Mittens in her lap. I offered to animate a wooden horse, but she'd rather have me do it. Likely just the beginning of her revenge.

The house is very nice, it has everything you'd expect from a modern domicile except for electricity and natural gas. But, city dwellers can buy long term re-usable spells they call Runes, short for Runestones, and use them to create Fire and Light. I'm obviously very interested in these, but they gave theirs to Holt's family before they left. So, I'll just have to wait.

It's starting to get dark, so I go around lighting the house up for everyone. We're all trying to decide whether it's worth the effort to try and find a restaurant, or just make something here. I don't really want to go anywhere, but don't care enough to argue against it. Apricot just wants us to make up our minds so she can eat. Turner is staying out of it. So, it's just down to mother and daughter arguing.