142 Chapter 1: Blank Slate l

-- AUGUST 2005, SENIOR YEAR --

I felt something tickle my balls, and with a start, I jerked awake.

"Mmph!" somebody groaned, and as I sat up, I realized I'd just shoved my dick an inch into a girl's throat. She took it like a trouper, gagging only slightly and keeping her head down, breathing heavily through her nose until I pulled back. And then she resumed rhythmically pumping my shaft in her hands and sucking on the mushroom head as if I'd never interrupted her.

My eyes fluttered for a brief second, giving me just enough time to see the golden blonde head bobbing up and down in my lap before my heavy eyelids closed themselves. The first thought into my head was the image of a young woman's face, astonishingly beautiful. Her eyes were a golden hazel and her smile so perfect that I wanted to fall in love with her at first sight. The second thought to enter my head was that everyone else who saw this face also fell in love with her at first sight. And because of this, I was going to have to get in line like every other poor schmuck gawking at her in this magazine.

Only I didn't have to wait in line. This was no magazine; the woman in question was really here, live and in the flesh. And unlike all those schmucks who had only come to know her from those magazines, I'd known her since we were children growing up on the same street in Orange County.

Back then, she'd become one of the first objects of my sexual desire. She'd been the girl next door, the hottest babe in school, and the head cheerleader all rolled into one. She'd been my first crush, at least in the teenage sense of ohmigawd-I-sooo-want-to-have-sex-with-her. And our lives together since had progressed through sex, betrayal, love, and even family.

Cracking my eyes open once again, I stared down the length of my naked torso until my vision focused. And I found that a gorgeous supermodel lusted after by the majority of males across the planet was the one giving me this exquisitely wonderful blowjob.

"Morning, Tiger," Adrienne Dennis crooned after popping off my prick. She lapped at my cockhead like a kid with an ice cream cone a few times before picking her head up to resume her up and down bobbing motions. And she hummed happily while caving in her cheeks to give me even more intense suction.

"Unnnghh..." I groaned rapturously, lifting a hand to caress her hair. She smiled around a mouthful of cock, giving me a few more strokes before pulling away one last time and then pushing herself upright.

The goddess of sexuality who had shared my bed last night was still naked save for a black leather choker with the words "Tiger's Pet" stitched into it. Her massive 36F tits were capped with erect pink nipples that jutted out from her heavy and yet firm mounds that seemed to defy gravity. I let my hands wander upwards to caress those globes and tweak their pink peaks while she hovered above my prick, holding me in her right hand and centering the upright rod at her gateway to heaven.

Adrienne closed her eyes as she slowly lowered herself onto me. She felt tighter than I remembered, although I seemed to be thinking that every time we'd been together lately. With Adrienne's self-determination to be a lesbian with only one dick in her life (mine), she really didn't get things as thick as my cock shoved into her pussy very often. So every time she did manage to find time to visit, it always felt like I was taking her virginity, stretching her out for the very first time. "Unghhh ... so biiig..." she moaned.

Grinning, I reached up to grasp the D-ring centered in the middle of her leather choker. The leash had been detached sometime last night, so that it wouldn't interfere with her comfort while sleeping. But the D-ring was fixed to the collar, and using it as a fingerhold, I suddenly tugged her body down against mine. Adrienne squealed as her chest slammed down atop my pectorals, and she continued squealing as I kicked my legs around her waist, bucking our bodies up and off the bed and rolling us over so that we landed with me on top and my dick still buried nearly eight inches up her cunt.

Giggling, Adrienne reached her hands up to cup my cheeks. With a sparkle in her eyes, she growled, "Fuck me, Tiger." And then she gave me one of her patented nuclear kisses.

Without releasing our lip-lock, I pulled most of the way out of her, dug my toes into the mattress, and then rammed my hips forward. I felt her lungs compress and a puff of air pop out of her mouth as I slammed into her. And while she fought to regain the lost oxygen, I pulled back and did it again.

Over and over I pounded the busty blonde babe. She, DJ, and Brooke had worn me out last night, but it's amazing how refreshed one can feel after a full night's sleep. Any cobwebs were gone from my mind as I'd now come fully awake. And all of my conscious energy was now focused on fucking the shit out of my supermodel lover.

"FUCK! ME!" Adrienne chanted in rhythm with my thrusts. "HARD! 'ER! HARD! 'ER!" she added.

I grinned. After a year working full-time as America's newest supermodel, Adrienne's body was in the most perfect condition of her young life. Every inch of her was toned and sculpted into a mouthwateringly beautiful figure that was the envy of most of the modern world. I held her narrow waist in my hands and gripped it as leverage for my thrusts. Every time my pelvis impacted hers, those massive tits bounced up to nearly slap her in the face. And I suddenly felt the urge to see if I could make Adrienne's own breasts spank her cheeks, so I hammered her harder and harder and harder, slowing down my pace but putting as much force into each lunge as I possibly could.

Unintentionally making my goal more difficult, Adrienne threw her head back as she howled in ecstasy, removing her cheeks another couple of inches further away. But I didn't mind. It wasn't whether I won or lost my challenge; it was how much fun we had playing the game. So I nailed the buxom blonde over and over again, driving my prick to maximum depth and then pulling almost all the way out. And with her legs rising up to wrap around my waist, Adrienne continued to verbally egg me on by pleading, "FUCK ME!!! FUCK ME!!! FUCK MEEEEE!!!"

"RRRRAAAGHHH!" I suddenly groaned as my orgasm overtook me, a little bit by surprise. I'd been so focused on driving myself harder and harder than I hadn't been paying attention to my ejaculatory control. No matter; I'd long since stopped trying to use a playbook with Adrienne. With her, the sex was always better when we both simply moved with each other, doing what came naturally. It was less mechanical, more intense, and always a great deal of fun. Fucking was just what we were both good at.

"AAAHHHHH!" Adrienne screamed as she felt me hosing down her insides. Her legs tightened around my waist, stopping my thrusts and trapping me at full depth within her. Her hands tightened around the back of my head, yanking my face down into the crook of her neck with those big tits squishing against my chin. And together, we made spastic humping motions while my cock continued to fire spitwads of spunk into the back of her womb.

A long time later, the world came back to me. It wasn't that I'd been knocked out. My conscious brain simply stopped bothering to track the passage of time. I'd reached some sort of Zen state of peace slumped over Adrienne's body, my nose pressed against her neck to let me breathe in her sweet scent while my cock slowly deflated inside her. My brain was a blank slate, fully emptied by the blissful ejaculation. And for a few seconds, nothing in this world could possibly bother me.

But the moment passed eventually, and my senses became aware of the sweat drying off my back, the fatigue in my muscles from the exercise, and the stickiness between our naked bodies. Picking my head up, I found Adrienne staring at me with a wondrous smile on her face. And after nuzzling my nose with her own, she gave me a quick kiss and then dropped her head away with a forlorn sigh.

We had a connection, she and I. It wasn't telepathy or any science fiction mumbo-jumbo. We simply had spent enough time together and reached a level of openness to be able to read each other's mood. I could tell instantly that despite our wonderful lovemaking, Adrienne now felt a melancholy sadness. And I could easily guess why.

"You're leaving again, aren't you?" I asked quietly.

Taking a deep breath, she picked her head up to look back at me. Giving me a helpless frown, she sighed, "I wish I didn't have to."

I shook my head. "You DON'T have to. There's a spare bedroom right across the hall. Or you could always just move in here with me." That last bit carried a faint note of hope on my part.

Adrienne grinned, shrugging. "Sounds wonderful, actually. But it's not realistic." She now looked apologetic. "I'm sorry, Tiger. But I've got to go. And I don't even know when I'm going to see you again."

"But you just got here last night," I whined.

"I know, I know. But I have to."

I frowned. "You know, for someone who officially lives in San Francisco, you sure seem to be gone from the Bay Area a lot."

Adrienne's face fell, and she gave me a wan smile. "I go where the work is. And that's what I was trying to say about not being sure when I'll see you again. I'm moving out of Felicia's apartment."

I arched an eyebrow. By now, my dick had fully softened and slipped out from her saturated pussy. Sliding off Adrienne's body, I settled onto my stomach beside her and propped myself up on my elbows. "Moving where?" Somehow, I knew she didn't mean to a different apartment in the same city.

She took a deep breath, gathering herself before saying, "I'm moving in with Caroline. I told you about Caroline, right?"

"Your new girlfriend. Works at Vogue or something."

Adrienne smirked. "I don't know about 'new' girlfriend. We've been together since May. But anyway, there's been a ton of work coming my way in New York – it's the modeling capital of the world you know – and it just makes sense for me to move my home base there. Plus ... well ... I miss her."

"Thought you missed me too."

"I do, Tiger." She laughed, stroking my cheek. "I'll still be around. You know I will. I just don't know how often I'll be able to swing by the Bay Area."

I took a deep breath and exhaled. "It just feels like everyone is leaving me. Dawn's off on her 'sabbatical'. I burned my bridge with Kim. Bert's hooked up with Lynne now. And without Dawn, I don't know how things are going to be between Gwen and Robin and me. Now, you tell me you're moving clear across the country!"

She gave me a warm smile, rubbing my cheek again. "You'll be fine. Your new school year is starting, and this campus is full of beautiful babes who would love to get to know you better. I'll ask Brooke to keep an eye on you, too." She giggled and threw me a wink. "And you know that I don't even have to ask DJ to give you a little extra attention."

I shrugged and smiled at that. DJ sure had been extra-frisky ever since coming back to Berkeley. Indeed, before she and Brooke went downstairs to their own bedrooms last night, the younger Evans girl gave me a look that said she'd rather have stayed cuddled up by my side.

But the last thing I wanted right now was another girlfriend. I'd done the rebound thing twice already since Dawn broke up with me. Yeah, I felt lonely, but artificially plugging some new girl into the hole in my heart wasn't going to solve anything long-term. And it certainly wouldn't be fair to someone as special to me as DJ.

Sighing, I blinked and brought my attention back to the real world. Adrienne had been watching me with a faint smile on her face while I'd been spacing out. And her smile got wider when I looked back at her. "You don't have to leave right away, do you?"

"Uh, no," she replied with furrowed eyebrows. "I wanted to visit you, of course. But I came back to the Bay Area because I need to pack up my stuff and arrange to have it shipped to New York. I'm not in any hurry to get started, but don't you have class soon?"

"Not until 11am on Mondays and Wednesdays. Perk of my Senior schedule." I grinned, and then reached up to fondle one of Adrienne's beautiful boobs. "Can we go one more time before you leave?"

Adrienne's eyes glittered as her hand slid down to pet my cock, which was already beginning to show signs of new life. "I'd love to."

We actually went twice more, and when Adrienne and I were finally done she gawked at the clock and scrambled naked out of bed, my cum still leaking out of her stretched anus. "Shit! I'm gonna be late!" she complained as she hastily dabbed at her leaking butthole with some tissues and tried to hop into her panties at the same time.

"Late?" I complained. "It's not even 9am. I thought we might grab a quick bite to eat or something."

"Sorry, Tiger. I'm meeting my agent downtown at 10. We've got a zillion things to discuss before I move to New York. I'll barely have enough time to put my face together and get into the city." Her naked bosoms jiggled beautifully before being tucked away into an industrial-strength bra designed more to hide than titillate. All part of the incognito-look. Adrienne smirked at the spaced out expression on my face and turned her back to me, smiling when I finally picked my gaze up to look her in the eyes. "I'm gonna be in front of your mirror. Think you can make me a cup of coffee without setting the kitchen on fire?"

"Don't bet on it," I replied. But I still got up, dressed, and headed downstairs. Working a coffee machine was one of the few things I was capable of.

Wearing only a T-shirt and my pajama bottoms, I arrived on the first floor just in time to see Brooke and DJ heading for the door.

"Morning sleepyhead. Quite a racket you two made this morning," Brooke commented dryly.

I shrugged. "You were welcome to join us."

DJ sighed regretfully. "Some of us have class this morning. Say 'bye' to A.D. for us, will ya?"

I nodded. "Will do."

The girls waved on their way out the door, and then I headed into the kitchen to make the coffee. Unfortunately, my goodbye with Adrienne fifteen minutes later was just as brief. I begged her to stick around long enough to fry me an egg or something, but Adrienne merely pointed me to the refrigerator and the frozen toaster waffles inside before giving me a kiss and racing out the door to a waiting cab, clutching a Cal Berkeley travel mug that she promised to return (eventually).

When Adrienne's cab was out of sight, I turned about and went back into the house. After the door closed behind me, I took a deep breath and looked around. Once again, I was all alone. As I cocked my ears, I realized that I heard nothing but the sound of silence. No footsteps on the floorboards. No TV or video games in the background. No roommates chatting about meaningless topics.

Just me.

I thought of the previous three years of my college career, this house full of sisters, friends, and lovers. I could count on one hand the number of times I'd left this house in the morning to go to class without somebody walking with me. But now I didn't know when I'd have a walking companion again.

Just me.

It was my Senior Year of college. It was supposed to be the best year of the best years of my life.

But it was just me. And I didn't know when ... or even "if" ... that might ever change.

"Hey there, stranger." Bert greeted me with a fist bump and then fell into step alongside as we trudged up the hill toward our first class of the new year. I was thankful I'd run into at least one familiar face before getting to class.

"Hey," I replied back while arching an eyebrow. "Why does that phrase sound familiar?"

Bert blushed. "Lynne told me to say that to you. She said she always--"

"--always greeted me that way over the summer," I finished for him with a smile. "How is she?"

Bert's smile ran from ear-to-ear. He was so happy he couldn't stop smiling to save his life. "She's... amazing."

"That she is," I agreed. "You see her over the weekend?"

Bert nodded. "I went to visit her yesterday, got introduced to the whole gang."

I whistled. "That must've been interesting."

Bert grinned. "Noelle told me not to come back until you'd taught me how to give a proper backrub."

I barked a quick laugh.

Bert sighed, his smile finally dropping. "You know, you're a really tough act to follow, man."

I frowned. "What do you mean?"

Hooking his thumbs into the straps of his backpack, Bert took a deep breath. And then shooting me a mysterious look, he intoned quietly, "I feel like everything I do is gonna get compared to you. Let's face it: you're Lynne's last boyfriend. You're the guy who hung out with her friends all summer. Kady wants to drink beer with me, Noelle wants me to give her backrubs, and ... well ... in the bedroom ... Lynne..."

I stopped walking and turned to face my friend. "Hey, there's no competition here. I'm not some superstar that you have to replace in the hearts and minds of Stanford's female population."

"Says you."

I sighed. "Look: there's only one opinion that really matters in this case: Lynne's. And no matter what paranoia you might be feeling right now, the bottom line is that SHE chose YOU over ME."

Bert screwed up his face. "What?"

I spread my hands out. "I wanted to be with her, but she turned me down. She picked you, dude. Remember that."

"Huh..." He let that thought roll around in his head.

I clapped him on the back, getting us moving again. "Forget about trying to be anything like me. She wants you for you. If she wanted me, she woulda kept me, okay?"

"Okay," he affirmed, lost to his own thoughts for a moment.

And I was lost to mine. Adrienne, DJ, Dawn, Lynne, even Amber ... If they really wanted me, they would have kept me, wouldn't they?

But they hadn't. So what did that say about me?

I felt my heart speed up the moment I saw her. It was inevitable, of course. I'd front-loaded my core curriculum, getting all the requirements out of the way early so I could fill up my Senior Year with electives. But Kim Fukuzaki was still in the Undergraduate Business Program with me, which meant that it was near-impossible for us NOT to share at least one class this semester. At least I was expecting to see her this afternoon. I'd gotten a late lunch with Bert after our 11am class and he told me he'd been in contact with Kim and gotten her class schedule. So I knew she would be in my 2pm UGBA 119 Strategic Planning class.

The pretty Japanese-American 21-year-old was standing just outside the classroom, out of the flow of traffic but close enough that it would be impossible for me to enter without her seeing me. There was no sight of her motorcycle jacket nor her typical black hoodie. Instead, she wore a crisp blouse with a high collar and dangling earrings, and after a moment's thought I realized both were articles I'd chosen for her last spring while proclaiming them among my favorites as they emphasized her willowy figure and graceful neck. She had also changed her hairstyle, cropping her dark locks just below shoulder-length while letting her bangs grow out so that they arced to one side of her face all the way down to chin-level. The blonde streaks were now gone, leaving her hair a single shade of shimmering black. And as she turned to look at me with a pleasant smile, I found myself wondering what else had changed about the girl I once knew.

Kim made no invitation for me to approach further. I'd come to a stop about ten feet away, taking in her appearance and mentally processing how I should proceed. It was clear that she was waiting for me, but she did not wave me over. Instead, she merely held my gaze, eyes a little wide, with a ... hopeful ... expression on her face.

I smiled and decided to go talk to her. I didn't have any concrete reasons for doing so versus ducking my head and blitzing into the classroom while avoiding her gaze, apart from my male ego telling me not to duck and run. I didn't take into consideration the nature of our break-up or the separation we'd gone through since the end of our academic Junior year. And I didn't know what the hell I was going to say to her. I just felt like talking to her. With few people on this campus I could truly consider a friend, I admittedly felt a little lonely. And if Kim and I could figure out a way to be friends again, I knew my life would be better for it.

She blushed and coyly turned her face away while I approached, keeping those long bangs covering her face until after I'd come to a stop right in front of her. But two seconds after I came to a stop, she turned to look back at me with that hopeful expression on her face once again.

"Hey," I greeted, doing my best to inject confidence into my voice. "How are you?"

"I'm doing well," Kim answered in an even tone, her eyes searching mine. "How are you?"

"I'm..." I began automatically before realizing I didn't know how to finish that sentence. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. And shrugging helplessly, I finished, "I don't know."

She nodded slowly. "I heard about Amber. I'm sorry."

I shrugged again. "It's okay."

"I heard about Dawn. I'm sorry," she added.

I took another deep breath, then exhaled and repeated, "It's okay. It's just a break-up. It's not like Hurricane Katrina landed on me."

Kim smiled at me, and I watched her almost nervously looking into my eyes. She started to gather herself to say something, but before she did, I spoke instead.

"Look, I tried to apologize to you the last time we met, but I don't think I really told you how awful I felt for just so bloodlessly dumping you at the end of last year. No matter what was going on between Dawn and me, you didn't deserve--"

She quieted me with a finger to my lips, raised eyebrows, and a glaring expression in her eyes that brooked no dissent. When it was clear I wasn't going to keep trying to talk, she pulled her finger away and took a deep breath. "I forgave you long ago. It's done."

"Kim, it's not that simple. I--"

She shushed me again with a finger to my lips, startling me as I now realized how out of character such an action was for a self-proclaimed submissive. Keeping the finger against my lips, her left hand reached across the gap between us, taking my right hand in her own. Finally pulling her finger away from my mouth and squeezing my hand, Kim stated softly, "You don't need to apologize to me any further. I understand. It's okay."

Raising my eyebrows, I exhaled. "That's very generous of you."

"You're welcome," she replied simply, then lowered her eyes demurely.

We started to lapse into an uncomfortable silence, but before it dragged, I inhaled and asked, "So where are you living now? Not still commuting all the way from Sunnyvale, I hope."

Kim gave me an enigmatic look, and then shook her head. "I hope not either."

"So you've found a new place in town?"

"Found, yes."

"Where at?" Kim didn't answer, still giving me that look. It suddenly hit me, and I arched an eyebrow. "You want to move back into the house?"

"Is the room already spoken for?"

I smirked and shook my head. "Uh, no."

Kim smiled. She didn't ask. I got the distinct impression that she wouldn't ask. I knew she wanted to move back in, and she knew that I knew. So that was already enough. The ball was in my court.

Instantly my mind was filled with ideas, some of them fantasies. I pictured Kim hooking her thumbs into the straps of her backpack as she walked up the sidewalk toward class with me in the mornings. I pictured Kim wearing an apron as she cooked one of the meals I had come to treasure in the past year. And I pictured a naked Kim beneath me, her skin flush and her bangs sweat-sticking to her forehead as she gasped each time my thick cock burrowed nearly eight inches into her pliant body.

Those images picked my head up rather quickly. I wanted to see them come true, and I instinctively knew it was possible to attain them. I recognized the look in her eyes all last year and I recognized it now: Kim would do anything for me. All I had to do was ask, and she would take Dawn's place in my life and in my heart.

But I couldn't do that.

Popping my eyebrows and giving Kim a serious look, I grimaced and began explaining, "Hey, I'd be happy to have you move back into the house."

Kim's face fell a bit as she read the expression in my eyes. "But..." she led me.

"But ... I know what you wanted from me a few weeks ago: You wanted me to take care of you. But even though I'm not with Amber anymore, that's simply something I can't do. I'm a wreck right now. Coming off this break-up and with Dawn leaving and everything, I'm in no shape to be anybody's master."

Still holding my fingers, Kim began using her thumb to rub my palm in soothing strokes. Taking on an amused little smile, she shook her head in the negative. And after stopping her head-shake, she brushed her long bangs back behind an ear and explained, "I'm not asking you to take care of me. I only want to be your friend."

My eyebrows popped. "Excuse me?"

Kim smiled wider, looking quite pleased with herself. Only now did I start to realize that her tone was casual, almost conversational. So often when Kim spoke as 'submissive Kim', her grammar became formal and her tone became meek, but not today. "I'm not trying to become your girlfriend again; I know that you don't have the same strength of feelings for me that I have for you, and this soon after your break-up a romantic relationship wouldn't be healthy for either of us. Really, right now I just need a place to stay so I don't have to commute back and forth every day. We were friends once, and I would like to be again."

"I would too. But are you sure you can just be friends with me?"

Kim took a deep breath and gave me a tight look. "I won't lie: I'm still in love you."

I winced immediately.

Kim shook her head. "But I won't ask you to be my Master again."

"Ever?"

She blushed and averted her eyes.

"So is that the idea? To be my friend and bide your time until I come around and show myself ready to love you the way you want to be loved?"

Kim scrutinized the ground and turned even pinker. "It's not exactly like that." She picked her head up and looked at me seriously. "I can help you. You may still feel broken down inside, but I know the man you can be. I want to see you become that man. I want to see you strong. You don't have to understand my motivations, but you already know that I consider your happiness to be my happiness. And I want to do whatever I can to see you happy again."

"Something tells me you've got a plan for how to do that," I commented with raised eyebrows.

Kim smiled, full of confidence. This was hyper-organized Kim. This was Kim with forethought. She'd been thinking about this for a long time, and had meticulously planned out where to meet me, how to dress, and what to say to me in order to accomplish her goals. Sometimes I made the mistake of thinking she was helpless, a submissive too afraid to make her own decisions. On the contrary, she was a remarkably capable young woman fully able to set goals for herself and take action to achieve them.

She was just happier believing that someone was looking out for her. And with that in mind, she explained, "With your permission of course, I do have a plan."

I gestured for her to go ahead.

Kim's smile got wider. "It starts with us going inside and sitting together for class."

I chuckled and shrugged. "Easy enough."

"And then after class is finished," she continued, a fresh sparkle coming into her eyes. "We go home and you fuck the shit out of me."

My eyes popped open wide. Blinking quickly, I muttered, "Uh, didn't we just agree to just be friends?"

She put a finger to her lips and put on a coyly innocent expression while looking off to the side. "Well ... maybe friends with benefits."

"Ohm! Uhm! Ngh! Ngh! EEEK!" Kim squeaked as she threw her head back, her neck straining in a vain attempt to embed the back of her skull a few inches deeper into the mattress. This left her neck fully exposed for my lips to clamp down upon like a bloodthirsty vampire, although I only sucked on her skin and did not actually bite her.

Feeling her pussy muscles spasming around my penetrating rod, I humped her once ... twice ... three more times before holding myself at maximum depth as my cockhead expanded and exploded. Hot firebolts of streaking sperm lanced out into Kim's sucking womb. And her orgasmic squeals mingled with my deep groans as the two of us thrashed on my bed in mutual climax.

Gawd damn this felt good. Little alarm bells had been going off in my head ever since Kim suggested that I fuck the shit out of her after class. Negative notions about rebounding and willful ignorance of Kim's true feelings for me had gone to war with my almost desperate aversion to being alone and the painful awareness that both Dawn and Adrienne were no longer in my daily life. My mental hang-ups probably would have precluded this sexual encounter, but Kim had been surprisingly persistent and in the end, I decided "Fuck it" and let the temporary bliss drown away my concerns for a little while.

And it felt very, very good.

Maybe I was overthinking this. Maybe rebounding again wouldn't really be so bad.

I shuddered as I squirted out the last few drops of spunk into Kim's massaging canal. Sighing contentedly, I slumped down atop her naked chest as my strength momentarily gave out. And Kim cradled my head in her hands as she giggled happily.

Turning my face to hers, we exchanged a tender kiss before I propped myself up onto my elbows, smiling as I looked down at the pretty Japanese girl's face. "I like the hair," I complimented, reaching up with my left hand to flick her long bangs to the side. "Who's idea was it?"

"Mine, actually," she replied with a demure smile.

I blinked twice in surprise and then grinned. "I'm proud of you."

"Thank you."

Just then, my bedroom door cracked open. Gasping, Kim huddled beneath my body as if she could disappear behind my bulk. I was consciously aware that my dick was still imbedded in her pussy with my bare ass visible for the world to see; but while surprised, I wasn't overly alarmed. Not bothering to try and cover up, I simply turned my head around to see who was entering my room unannounced. And I rolled my eyes when Brooke and DJ poked their heads in.

"Told ya it would be Kim," Brooke snarked, looking over at DJ.

"Fine, fine," DJ conceded. "You were right."

"Guess you're stuck in the room next to me," Brooke explained.

"Psht. Guess you're stuck having to ask permission to come use the vanity in my bedroom."

"Hey, that's only your bedroom because I gave it to you last year."

"Ugh, if I thought it was going to be such a bone of contention I woulda--"

"Ladies!" I interrupted harshly, gesturing down to the girl still trapped beneath my body. "Do you mind?"

"Oh, not at all. You guys go right on ahead," Brooke replied and turned back to DJ, oblivious to the fact that Kim and I were still coupled together. "Now seriously, that vanity was something that WE agreed--"

"Children!" I barked rather more emphatically.

"Fine, fine," DJ grumped, grabbing onto Brooke's elbow and leading her out while tugging on the doorknob behind her. "But don't ask us for help in moving Kim's stuff back into her room."

Turning back to my lover, who blushed rather nervously, I shrugged and sighed, "Roommates..."

As it turned out, rather than take her motorcycle to school, Kim had borrowed her brother's Accord and driven up with all her belongings inside, so there was no delay in getting her things unpacked into her old room. She always knew I would let her move back in if she only asked, and so far, everything was going according to her plan.

Bert dropped by in the evening after his last class. He and Kim exchanged friendly hugs, and he expressed his happiness for Kim's return and that we were getting things worked out. I joked that I was happier to see the Xbox get plugged back into my TV, and Kim slapped my arm.

Kim and Brooke collaborated on dinner for all five of us, and after everything was cleaned up, we started to go our separate ways. Brooke and DJ said they were going off to Vivian Wang's house to hang out with their friends (and boyfriends). Bert left to hop a BART and return home. And instead of finding myself completely alone, I smiled to see Kim beside me at the dining table.

Sliding a hand across the table, I covered hers and squeezed her fingers. "So what's next on this grand "Healing Ben" plan of yours? More crazy monkey sex I hope?"

Kim smiled and pulled her hand away from mine, shaking her head. "No. Now we study our materials and do our homework. And then we take separate showers and go to sleep in our own rooms."

My face fell. I'd certainly been looking forward to no longer having to sleep alone. "Wait, what?"

Kim smirked at me. "Was there something I said that was unclear?"

I frowned. While I certainly would never force Kim to have sex with me, I had to admit I'd been expecting she would share my bed again now that she had chosen to re-enter my life. After all, I was totally single now, without any girlfriends in the way. True, I was an emotional wreck at the moment, but this was her single best chance to make me fall in love with her. And after this afternoon's wonderful bedroom session, I wasn't exactly averse to the idea. "It's just ... I thought..."

"You thought that I would want to become your girlfriend?" The tone in her voice made me feel silly for thinking it, like a teacher who was asking her student, 'Are you SURE that's the right answer?'

"Uh ... well..." I stammered.

"I am your friend, for now," Kim explained patiently. "Hopefully, we will come to a point where you can once again be my Master. But I am not – and do not ever want to be – your 'girlfriend'."

Blinking rapidly, I gawked at the pretty girl beside me. "Are you serious? Last year you were talking about being a devoted wife to your Master and bearing his children. I'm not saying that the two of us should be jumping into a romantic relationship or anything, but I have to admit I'm outright shocked to hear you say you don't ever want to be my girlfriend."

Kim took a deep breath and tilted her head to the side. Looking sad, she explained, "I love you. I'm IN love with you. And I do hope that someday you will come to love me as strongly. But the last thing you need right now is another girlfriend, and I think we would make a poor couple besides."

"Why would you say that?"

Blushing, Kim glanced down at her lap for a moment before giving me an almost embarrassed look. "I've been talking to people. I talk to Bert a lot, but I've also spoken with Lynne and even Amber."

My eyebrows popped. "You talked to Amber?" I asked incredulously. "How the-? How did you get her number? Why didn't she tell me?"

"Don't be angry with Amber. I asked her not to tell you."

I seethed a little inside. Amber should like ME more than Kim – should be on MY side. As far as I knew, Amber had never even MET Kim. Heck, Lynne would have only met Kim the one time at my birthday. Once again it felt a little like the girls around me were going behind my back and keeping me out of the loop in their machinations. And having already noticed how Kim had a way of lurking in the background, always knowing a little bit more than she let on, I wasn't feeling particularly comfortable with her right now. "Go on," I said a little gruffly.

Kim took a deep breath, measuring her words. "When Dawn broke up with you, Lynne did her best to give you emotional ... and sexual ... support. She made it clear that she wanted to maintain a non-romantic relationship with you, but you two still became quite emotionally intimate."

I frowned, but nodded.

"Immediately after that, you started your relationship with Amber. You had known her for less than two weeks, and had broken up with Dawn barely more than two months prior, but you were already speaking of marriage and brought Amber to spend a weekend camping with your family."

"What's your point?"

"You can't keep clinging to the next woman who gets close to you. I can certainly understand that being in a relationship can feel quite emotionally rewarding and supportive and ... safe. But you are never going to be strong again if you can't remember how to take care of yourself."

"I'm not so pathetic that I don't know how to be alone," I stated defensively.

"Aren't you?"

I glared at Kim, but she didn't shrink beneath my gaze. She stared right back at me for a long while, and in the end, I was the one who averted my eyes. I didn't necessarily think I was being pathetic, but my rational brain had to admit that I'd been rebounding quite a bit lately. And when the hell did Kim become the less emotionally-dependent one between us?

"What do you want in life?" Kim asked quietly, bringing my gaze back to her.

"What do you mean?"

"It's a simple question."

I barked a short laugh and shook my head. "No, it's not. The words are simple but the meaning is ... pretty heavy."

"It is."

"And nobody can really know exactly what they want."

"I do."

That shut me up for a moment. Kim's statement was so firm and assured that I had absolutely no doubt in my mind that she meant it. But her words were nonetheless quite befuddling to me. The girl wasn't any older than me, younger by a few months even. She'd lived a fairly sheltered life throughout her formative years and had even become a submissive who practically lived to have other people tell her what to do. And she was claiming that she knew exactly what she wanted in life? It seemed an idea completely incongruous to her very nature.

Shaking my head, I replied, "You can't know exactly what you want."

"I do. I've had a lot of time to myself to just stop and think about it. I don't claim to have everything figured out. I'm still young and hopefully I will continue to live for a long time. I realize that what I want at present may change in the future. But for now, I have a very firm idea of what it is I want to make myself happy and what I need to do in order to see that happen."

"And what is that?"

Kim just gave me a mysterious Mona Lisa smile and shook her head.

I rolled my eyes and sighed.

"But do you know what you want?" she asked.

I shrugged. "To be happy."

"Everyone wants to be happy. Exactly how do you want to be happy?"

"You're not going to let this go, are you?"

"Nope."

"I'm starting to wish you didn't come home with me."

Kim gave me another Mona Lisa smile.

I sighed wearily. At this moment, I felt like the ocean. My emotions were in constant flux, shifting with endless motion in waves across the surface of my being. Kim, on the other hand, was a massive rock outcropping on the shore. I could push my waves up against her over and over and over again, but she would stand fast, unyielding, letting me break myself against her until I exhausted myself.

Shaking my head, I shrugged and said the first thing that came to the top of my head. "I want to be in love."

Kim's eyes glittered. "Go on."

"I want to wake up every morning feeling my wife's body against mine. I want to get married and have a family and have a nice job that I don't hate and yet provides a stable income for me to support that family. I want to have sex ... lots of sex. And I want to go about my days surrounded by loved ones with whom I enjoy spending my time. Okay?"

"All appropriately vague and American Dream-y, aside from the 'lots of sex' bit," Kim said with a twinkle in her eye. "But it's a start."

I sighed.

"Now who do you want to be married to?"

I popped my eyebrows. "Excuse me?"

"It's a simple question."

I rolled my eyes. "No, it's not."

Kim took a deep breath, reorganizing her thoughts before returning her attention to me. "Do you want to love someone, or do you want to be in love?"

I arched an eyebrow. "Aren't those the same thing?"

She shook her head. "Not at all. Is there someone specific you want to love? (active verb)? Or do you want 'to be in love', and the girl herself is somewhat interchangeable?"

I frowned, sensing where she was going with this. "It's not that I'm willing to be in love with just anybody."

"How about me?"

"Huh?"

"Ten minutes ago, you were hoping we'd take a shower and make love and cuddle together in your bed. Were you hoping to be in love with me?"

I grimaced, not wanting to lead Kim on. I did like her, and I'd always cared about her; but despite our previous Master/sub relationship I'd just never quite felt that spark of true love between us, not even ten minutes ago when I'd contemplated the notion of rebounding into a new boyfriend/girlfriend relationship with her. "Uh, well..."

"Or were you just hoping you could bang me to make yourself feel better for a few moments and then sleep beside me so you wouldn't feel so alone at night?"

My face fell. "Kim," I began in a completely apologetic tone. "I'm sorry if--"

She shushed me with a finger to my lips again. Obediently, I shut up again. And not for the first time tonight I wondered what the hell happened to the shy, submissive girl I used to know.

Removing the finger from my lips, Kim explained, "When Dawn left you, you tried to be in a romantic relationship with Lynne. When that failed, you tried again with Amber. I'm not saying that either of those two women aren't worthy of your love. I'm sure they're very nice, very special people."

"They are."

"But did you want to be with them because you loved them? Or did you love them because you wanted the safety, security, and companionship of a relationship?"

There was a challenge in Kim's voice, and I opened my mouth to defend them. But I found myself frozen with my jaw hanging open. I'd never actually told Lynne that I loved her, allowing myself to get to the 'girlfriend' point but not quite that far. I HAD told Amber that I loved her, and even now I truly believed that my feelings had been genuine and NOT just a byproduct of missing Dawn. But I couldn't deny the element of truth in Kim's accusation.

Instead of answering, I just hung my head in shame. A second later, Kim put two fingers beneath my chin and gently pushed upward, lifting my head back up.

"Don't be embarrassed," she said soothingly. "What you felt for both of them was honest. There's nothing wrong with that. But you seem to be putting the cart before the horse. You said you want to be happy, and in order to be happy you need to be married with kids and a nice job and yadda yadda yadda. But you're going about it the wrong way. Well, the job part will follow from you graduating and getting your degree. But the marriage and family part all comes after you find the right woman. And do you know who she is?"

I blinked. "Uh ... well ... I thought she was Dawn."

"But not anymore?"

"I..." I sighed. "I don't know anymore."

"Fair enough."

"So what does this mean? Before, when you asked me what I wanted, I told you that I wanted to be in love. So are you saying that rather than wanting to be in love for the sake of being in love, what I should want is to find right girl?"

Kim smiled. "No. Not yet. What you should want right now is to figure out how to be by yourself. No girlfriends. You need to figure out how to be alone for a little while."

My heart sank. "But I like having a girlfriend."

"Right now, that's your problem."

My shoulders sagged. "So that's your solution? That's your grand 'Heal Ben' plan? To force me to sleep alone and go without sex or companionship until I figure out how to be happy without a girlfriend?"

"Well, sleeping alone tonight, yes. I think that your dependency on someone to cuddle with is tied to your emotional clinginess. And you definitely shouldn't have a girlfriend – not for a while at least. But as for going without sex or companionship ... Well, I think a little recreational fucking would be quite healthy for you."

I arched an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

Kim nodded. "It's casual, it's physical, and it brings you satisfaction. I think the majority of males on this planet have the exact opposite problem, but YOU need to remember that having sex with someone doesn't have to include emotional commitment."

Now both eyebrows were arched. "Never thought I'd ever hear a woman say that."

"I'm not like most women."

I shook my head wryly. If I had all this straight, Kim wanted to take care of me, cook and clean, valued my happiness above her own, wanted to provide me sexual comfort without the burdens of treating her like a girlfriend, AND encouraged me to have recreational sex with other women. "You most certainly aren't."

Kim's Mona Lisa smile was back.

Moist.

It's a strange word, isn't it? For starters, it sounds kinda funny. Moist. The "m" starts off warmly enough ... inviting ... like the word "mama". The little "oi" in the middle sounds perky and quirky. The "st" on the end, though, is a little abrupt. As words go, "moist" isn't very clear cut. Everyone sorta knows what it means, but find it hard to truly explain. When I think of the word "moist", I think of warmth and wetness, without necessarily being all that warm or even all that wet. And as I slumbered peacefully in the dead of night, even I found it peculiar that this particular word was entering my head.

Clenching. That was the next word that came to mind. My eyes were still closed and I felt a strange disconnect from the rest of my body. It was as if my brain was not yet plugged in, so that my consciousness floated on an endless sea of black nothingness without any sensory inputs. All I had were vague concepts, as if there were abstract letters projecting into the empty void of my mind. And I wasn't sure what to make of the letters that spelled "clenching".

Warmth. Now there was a reassuring word. It's very hard to find a context where "warmth" is a bad thing.

Weight. A form of measurement, neither positive nor negative. An indication of mass exerted upon by the force of gravity.

Moans. This one wasn't quite so abstract. I suddenly felt as if I indeed had ONE perceptive sense. And instead of seeing words floating in my mind, I actually heard something.

"Nnnnghhh..."

"Mmmmm..."

"Ahhhhhh..."

Pressure. Like my sense of hearing, I felt rather than conceived of pressure. There was a tightness surrounding me ... squeezing me ... somewhere. I wasn't sure yet, but it felt like it was below my chest level.

"Ohhhhhh..."

Pleasure. As a word, it wasn't so different from "pressure". They even rhymed. But the concept was tremendously different, and as my sense of touch came more alive, I also became more aware that whatever was happening to me felt ... good.

VERY good, in fact.

"I'm cumming! I'm cumming!"

That sense of weight was back. I was gaining tactile sense of my own body, and as I did so, became aware of two distinct pressure points pushing down against my chest. I also gained a sense of my own hands, finding that I was holding ... something. I wasn't sure what yet.

"Ohhhunnngh! Fuck! Fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck!"

Moist. Clenching. Warmth. Weight. Moans. Pressure. PLEASURE!

My eyes snapped open, illumination blinding me even though there wasn't even a lamp on in my bedroom. Moonlight outside my windows cast an eerie glow through the various cracks in my curtains, aided by reflections off the mirror above my dresser. The slender but unfairly stacked young woman straddling me went still, her hands clutching my shoulders as she threw her head back and moaned her ecstatic release. And as my now fully-awake body felt the full force of her orgasmic vaginal spasms, I felt the pressure inside me suddenly go slack as I erupted burst after burst after burst of scalding hot spunk up and into her clenching cunt.

"Ohhhunnngh! Cumming!" DJ Evans crooned as her entire body vibrated with sexual energy. She'd fashioned her hair into her old signature braided pigtails, twin twists of fine blonde locks that hung forward and ended in pink ribbon bows atop the slopes of her breasts. Those breasts were encased in a sheer, silky camisole with no bra, the full 34DD melons proudly thrusting forward with DJ's arched back. Firm, conical, erect nipples protruded almost obscenely through the skimpy material, making obvious dents that seemed to invite me to suckle or at least pinch them. But my arms were busy holding onto her hips and keeping her body pinned against my crotch as my penis continued spitting wads of cum into her snatch.

But eventually my cock started firing blanks, my hips bucking twice more before my ab muscles finally relaxed and let me simply lay there on the bed in peace. Likewise, DJ's voice gave out and her shoulders slumped. With a few deep breaths, she pitched forward, her head suddenly dropping six inches before she caught her descent and found enough strength in her arms to prop herself up.

For about a minute, neither of us said anything. I didn't know when DJ had come to me tonight and I didn't know for how long she'd been fucking me before I awoke. I didn't particularly care. After fitfully forcing myself to fall asleep alone in bed, even knowing that there were three beautiful young woman who each would probably have been willing to cuddle with me if only I asked them in the right way, I wasn't about to complain about what just happened.

DJ, meanwhile, was busy trying to recover from her climax. After she caught her breath, she picked her head up and gave me a tired but satisfied smile. Bending over, she stole a kiss from my lips and then slowly pushed herself up, taking care to cup her mound with one hand to prevent any leakage as she rolled off me and onto her back.

"Should I bother to ask why?" I asked quietly, glancing at the clock. "It's after 1am."

"Couldn't sleep." She shrugged before giving me a wicked grin. "And I got this really naughty idea in my head: I'm gonna go downstairs and squat over Brooke's face, feeding your sperm to her while she's unconscious."

My eyebrows popped at the imagery DJ had just put into my head. But as much as the idea titillated the naughty part of my brain, I couldn't help but reach out and touch her arm. "Sure you don't want to just cuddle up beside me? I'm sure I can help you go to sleep."

DJ gave me a soft smile, and her eyes shimmered for just a moment in the dim lighting. But she shook her head in the negative. "Sorry. Kim's orders. No overnights with you until she pronounces you good and ready."

My eyebrows rose again. "Kim's orders?" Those were two words I never expected to see put together in that sequence.

DJ giggled and leaned over to peck my lips once more. "Yep. Besides, I want to do this special delivery. G'night, Ben. Thanks for the ride." And with that, DJ slipped out of my bed, picked up her panties with one hand while still using the other to keep herself plugged. And then she waddled rather awkwardly out the door.

I exhaled slowly, feeling the pleasant heaviness of prolactin filling my brain and making me drowsy. After a wonderful ejaculation with a gorgeous young woman, I was feeling pretty good about myself. Okay, so Kim was currently forbidding me from cuddling overnight with a girl, so as to break my dependency on such an act as an emotional crutch. But she hadn't forbidden me from having sex, from squirting off a round or two before falling asleep. I could still do that. And as I closed my eyes and began to feel my brain slowly disconnecting the neural links to the rest of my body, I decided that I just might live without the overnight cuddling.

Kim appeared in the archway between the hallway and the living room, digging both of her thumbs into the straps of her backpack. "Ready to go?"

I looked up and nodded. While my first class Mondays and Wednesdays didn't start until 11am, my Tuesday and Thursday schedule began at nine. Although Kim and I were not in the same morning class, our UGBA electives were in the same building, so for at least two days a week I had someone with whom to walk to campus.

Before I actually got to my feet though, I shoved the last piece of waffle (from a mix, not frozen Eggos) into my mouth, swallowed, and then was forced to let out a loud burp. It was loud enough to get Kim giggling, and for Brooke to roll her eyes at me and drawl, "Don't be gross."

DJ sat up straight, tapped her own chest twice with a fist, and then let out a loud, "[BRAAAAAP]."

That got everyone giggling.

I finally stood up, picking up my plate. "Just lemme dump this in the sink."

"Leave it," DJ offered. "I'm getting up in a minute anyway."

"Thanks, kiddo." I bent over and pecked her forehead, causing the beautiful blonde to blush. And then I swung my messenger bag over my shoulder and nodded to Kim. "Shall we?"

Kim nodded and started up the hallway. I merely smiled and sighed happily, looking around at the bustle of my three roommates.

No longer just me.

"Ben, can you please stay a moment?"

I was still bent over at my desk, having just shoved my binder into my bag. Looking up, I saw Professor Isakova gesturing to me. And after glancing around the room for a half-second, I returned my gaze to her and nodded.

One-by-one, the professor dealt with the students in front of her while I waited patiently at my seat. It was the first day for this UGBA 113 Managerial Economics course, and there were always more questions on the first day. But I had no other classes today until late this afternoon, so I wasn't in any big hurry.

Eventually, the class cleared out and I stood up to approach my beautiful brunette professor. I've said before that Viktoriya Isakova had the face of a 35-year-old and the figure of someone even younger, and a year later the same still held true. I couldn't help but give her the once over in her prim and proper business suit, fondly recalling the summer internship last year when I could bend her over her own office desk at will and violate her tight body at my slightest whim. But after allowing myself a single up and down visual pass, I took a deep breath and looked her in the eyes. "It's good to see you again, Professor."

"You too, Ben," she replied warmly. I relaxed as she didn't use my full name.

"How was your summer?" I asked with an arched eyebrow, clear innuendo in my voice.

She smiled demurely. "Enjoyable, although perhaps not as enjoyable as the previous one." For some reason, her Russian accent added even more innuendo to her comment.

Our eyes twinkled at each other over our little inside joke, but then a more sad and concerned expression took over Viktoriya's face. "How are you, Ben? I have heard a few things about your own summer."

My eyebrows popped in surprise. What could Viktoriya possibly know about my summer? Not sure what I should give away, I fumbled for a second about how to respond.

Viktoriya sensed my hesitation and explained, "I know Dawn took a leave of absence. And also..." Her eyes drifted past my right ear, focusing somewhere behind me.

I turned to look and found that Kim, waiting for me after the end of her own class two doors down, had appeared at the door.

"I also spoke with Kim yesterday," Viktoriya finished. As she said this, Kim approached after closing the classroom door.

"Viktoriya, Amber, Lynne..." I drawled to my roommate. "Who haven't you chatted with in the last few days?"

She just gave me a Mona Lisa smile.

Sighing, I turned back to our professor and stated evenly, "I'm doing fine. I miss Dawn, of course. But life goes on. Besides, Kim seems to want to do a very good job of taking care of me."

Viktoriya smiled and commented, "This is a bit of a role reversal from last year."

I glanced at Kim, who stepped alongside me and took my hand in hers. "Something like that."

"Well I will leave you in good hands," Viktoriya stated, nodding her head to indicate that the conversation was coming to an end. But before she returned to her materials at the podium, she gave me a warm smile that was everything her Ice Queen persona was not, reached out to touch my arm, and said, "Please remember that I am here if you ever need to talk. I have a little experience in these matters, and I would be happy to give you some advice. The both of you are very special to me, and I want to make sure that you are doing alright."

"Thanks," I replied, accepting her offer in the spirit in which it was given.

Kim nodded silently and took a step back while tugging on my hand. And with a last smile for Viktoriya, I let Kim lead me away.

"So what's the plan for lunch?" I asked casually as Kim and I strolled down the pathways in the direction of home. Our classes ended at 11am, and my next one didn't start until 4pm. So I had a lot of time to kill.

"That's up to you."

I arched an eyebrow with a smile. "What? Up to me? Our lunchtime isn't part of your grand master plan? I would have thought you'd tell me that you were sending me off to fend for myself and therefore 'learn how to eat alone without being dependent upon companionship' or something."

Kim giggled at my insinuation and shook her head. "No. No master plan. Just lunch. What do you want to eat?"

"I'm up for anything."

"No, really. What do you want to eat?"

I chuckled. "That an offer to cook?"

"If you so wish." Kim's eyes lowered deferentially.

I heard the shift in her tone. For a brief moment, submissive Kim was back, and I stopped us in our tracks. On instinct, I commanded firmly, "Kim, tell me what you want to eat."

I hadn't meant to give Kim a command. If anything, my intention was for Kim to actually make a decision without my input. But my tone came out stronger than I was expecting, and Kim stopped walking dead in her tracks, bowing her head. "I want what you want to eat."

Submissive Kim: definitely back. "Kim..." I sighed wearily.

She blinked, a slow smile spreading across her lips. "Burgers or pizza?" she asked with a twinkle in her eyes.

I couldn't help it. My mind flashed back – WAY back – to our old theories of self-interest, and the chuckle was out of my throat before I even thought about it. "Burgers," I replied, the first thing entering my head.

"As you wish."

"I meant pizza."

"As you wish."

"I'm actually thinking sushi."

"Of course, sir."

"You're having fun with me right now, aren't you?"

"Absolutely." Kim smiled. "But you know that this isn't an act on my part. I really would like to feed you whatever food you would like to have for lunch today. I'm not all that particular, and the happiness I would feel from allowing you to have your choice in this matter outweighs the happiness I would feel from eating something of my own choosing."

"Thought I wasn't your 'Master' anymore."

"You're not. But I still want to please you. You may not be ready to assume that role yet, but I am still me."

I rolled my eyes and then took on my own smile. "Fine. We're going home, and you're going to cook me a lunch that will please me. But I'm not telling you what kind of food I want."

"Burgers it is, then," Kim replied, taking my hand and leading us to walk once again. "I found a new seasoning sauce over the summer that I think you'll like."

"Wait, how do you know I want burgers?"

Kim gave me that Mona Lisa smile, the twinkle once again in her eye. "Because I just know."

She was right.