Alone with My thoughts

Oxima POV

It was just a casual discussion that I should have forgotten as soon as it ended but no...

Here I am, smiling at the empty space. It feels like an eternity since I last heard from him. Hah, the truth is I have only met him once.

It was just the way we flowed together. It felt like I'd known him for ages, perhaps not in this world but in the world that existed before this one. It never felt like I was meeting him for the first time. The feeling is strange, but I feel we know each other; it's crazy, I know, but I am not Crazy.

We had talked on sweet nothing. I can't remember what we talked about, but it was sure one of the best conversations I ever had.

If he had not arrived at the bus station first, I am sure I would have gotten to know him better. Yes, I would love to continue the conversation. I would have loved the conversation to prolong further. I didn't want it to end. I wanted to gaze at his face and Rember all the details. There was something in that face that kept dragging me in. I melt on the inside, just looking at him. I don't know if it was the smile he had on one side of his full, pinky soft, looking lips or how he articulated each sentence. He sure knew how to switch from topic to topic without his audience getting bored.

If I follow my heart, I would ask the bus driver to stop ,then run straight to him and tell him that I have not had enough of him.

"Don't be ridiculous, girl; you would have sounded like a complete jerk, haha." Yes, he would have thought I was insane. There was no way I would have done that. It would have been a complete embarrassment. Who knows if he ever had a second thought of me the minute after i left the scene? Who knows if he enjoyed our conversation as I did or was only winning away time after all, the journey was so long yet so short for me.

How can I help my thoughts? Something about his look told me he would have wanted to stay longer,, but why didn't he say anything? He didn't even wave goodbye.'He never did turn. He could have asked for my phone number, right?' I watched him walk out of the door, hoping that he would turn back, look at me or say something. He just kept moving; he did not hang, not even for a minute. Not that I watched him all through as he walked opposite my direction, but my heart never missed a second of him as he stepped away.

My eyes followed him as the bus moved, but he got smaller until I could no longer see him. I felt a thump' in my heart when I could no longer see him.

"Will I ever see him again?" This is the only thought that has occupied my mind since that moment.

"Wake up, girl, and face reality. It was just a normal chat, nothing more. That guy could be a serial killer." this was not the first time I tried to wake myself up from my fantasy, but I just couldn't.

It's been a few days since that meeting. I know I told myself it was just a casual chit chat but who was I kidding? I can't get over it. At least my heart won't let me, no matter how hard I tried.

I wanted to see him again. I wanted that chit-chat. In fact, I have put some actions to my thoughts by always going to the same bus station. Hope against hope that we might meet again, but it has been nothing but disappointment.

I didn't give up and kept my faith alive, but it was no use because after a month, I could no longer really tell what he looked like. I just felt that I would recognise him when I see him.

Hahaha, it seems like I have become a hopeless romantic. Ahh! I never really believed in such attraction. I was of the opinion that romantic novels are very unrealistic here was i not acting differently from the pictures those romantic stories projects.

Five months later, I saw two lover birds who were chit-chatting like they had no worries in the world. That reminds me of my bus experience. I shook my head from right to left since the memory of that event felt far but close. Looking at the couple in front of me, I could not help but peep to see their faces.

.... I was shocked, like someone who saw a ghost. I have thought of many possibility of seeing him again. Maybe we could meet on a bus, or a park. I even once came down from his bus station, hoping against hope that I would see him.

But I never once thought of this possibility."Should I go and introduce myself?* I asked myself.

" But who would I say I am? We only chatted for a few minutes on the bus."

Shaking my head, I turned around and left without looking back. "Yes, I have longed to see him again, but now that I did, I realize we were strangers. But why does my heart still hurt so much?