The Soul
Where others sought pleasure from harming others, Ash found the whole process as being uncomfortable.
She did not like harming others and that had not changed ever since she was young.
Ash was brought up quite well by her mother and she was taught restraint from an early age so even when she was stronger than others in her age group, she knew how to control herself and not use her power to bully them.
She may have changed a lot since those days but the core of her remained.
Even if she did go against a lot of the things she previously believed in and was brought up to act like, there was a limit to how much of herself she was willing to throw away.
There was a part of her that did not wish to become anything like those who had abused her too.
She despised how they took pleasure in tormenting others and she wanted nothing more than to avoid becoming anything like them.