Chapter 13

"W-where am i?" I ask.

Pakiramdam ko binugbog ako na di ko malaman

"W-what happened?" Tanong ko ulit.

Diken is in my side. Holding my hand.

He looked like he cried.

"D-did you cry?" I ask, again.

He just look at me with full of love and admiration.

I can see that he's happy.

He smiled at me.

And i don't know but it make my heart thump.

Nakakagaan ng pakiramdam ang mga ngiti nya.

Humigpit ang hawak nya sa akin

I was about to say something, when the Doctor enter

"Please refrain yourself from doing heavy things, no stress, eat more healthy foods." She explain.

"This is the list of your vitamins and also the milk that i recommend" She continue.

Diken get the paper and seriously look at it.

"Hmm .. okay doc, what happened to me?" I ask.

She smiled.

"You're two weeks pregnant Misis" she said.

"A-am I?" Tanong ko. I touch my tummy.

"Diken .. we are having a baby?"I ask happily.

Oh! That's why he look like he cried.

"Yes hon! My angel is in here." He said touching my tummy.

He looks like he's very happy.

"You're crying." Sabi ko ng makita syang may luha sa mata.

I wipe his tears. I am too is happy and crying.

We're having a baby for christ sake!

"I'll leave you too alone. Just don't stress yourself misis ha?" Paalala pa ng doctor.

"Oh my god diken! Mag kaka baby na ako?" I ask again.

I can't believe it. Yes, i feel the sign. I am just so fucking hapy!

"Mag kaka baby na tayo." He corrected me.

"Kailangan mas mag ingat ka. I don't want you leave my eyes okay?" He said.

Tumango ako. I know he's doing it for the baby.

"I need to call my secretary to buy these for you." He said.

He was about to stand when stop him.

"A-ako na lang ang bibili please? I want to experience it" sabi ko sa mahina at mababang boses.

Huminga sya ng malalim.

"Bakit pakiramdam ko ayaw mo akong isama sa lahat ha?" He said.

"May problema ba tayo?" Dagdag nya.

"Because i fucking don't know what to do anymore!" He looks so frustrated.

And it pained me.

I don't know. Maybe its my hormones talking kaya parang ang tigas ko sa kanya.

Hindi ko sya sinagot o nagsalita. Napayuko na lang ako.

"Okay, fine. Bibili tayo pag labas dito mamaya" sabi na lang nya na umalis na.

Why do i feel so sad na wala na sya?

Ano ba naman to

Naramdaman ko na lang na umiiyak na pala ako.

I touch my tummy again, and i smiled.

Biglang nakakagaan ng pakiramdam knowing someone is growing in my tummy.

And its my baby!

Napabuntong hininga ako.

I feel so alone.

Nakakita ako sa tv ng commercial ng ice cream.

And i want one!

Tumayo ako.

"Bakit ka tumayo! Sabi ng doctor huwag kang magkikikilos! You need rest! Baka mapano si baby!" He said in a half shouted voice.

Para akong sinaksak sa sinabi nya.

He only cares for the baby huh?

"Wag kang mag alala. Hindi ko naman ipapahamak ang sarili kong anak." Sagot sa mas malamig na boses.

And it shut him up.

Bumalik ako sa kama, at tumalikod sa kanya.

I can feel his presence on my back. Pero hindi ako tumingin sa kanya.

"I am so sorry. I'm just ... So worried" he said.

I know i am crying again. I wipe my tears. I decided to be silent and not say anything kasi baka mas masaktan ako.

Nakakapagod pa lang masaktan.

Nakakapagod ng umiyak.

Nakalabas na kami sa hospital and we're now in her house in manila.

Hindi ko na nakausap si daddy. Kht si mommy hindi pa din.

Did they know that I'm pregnant?

Hindi ko na din pinapansin si Diken simula nun.

I don't know. I feel like he just wants me because of the baby.

At pinapabayaan nya lang akong ganun.

I smiled bitterly.

Hays.

I want Mangoes!

Sabi ko sa isip ko.

Nahihiya akong magsabi sa kanya ng mga gusto ko.

I feel so awkward in the presence of him

Sabay kaming kumakain. But we're not talking.

Or he is the one talking.

Nakita ko si Tatang Mario. He is one the cleaning the house. He's also the caretaker.

"Hello po tatang" masayang bati ko.

He smiled at me.

"Magandang hapon po Ma'am Leigh" sagot nya na nakangiti.

Ngumiti ako sa kanya.

"Maaari nyo ho ba akong ibili ng mangga Tatang? Nakakatakam ho kasi e" kwento ko.

"Ay naku hija, naglilihi ka kasi, ganyan din ang asawa ko dati sa panganay ko" kwento neto

"Talaga ho? Mahirap ho ba?" Tanong ko.

"Ay naku, mahirap ho, wala namang madali,  pero nakaya naman ng asawa ko kaya alam kong kaya nyo din yan" sabi nya.

Napahawak ako sa tyan ko. I have my baby bump and it looks so cute.

"Sige ho ma'am bibili na ho ako" sabi nya.

"Wait lang tatang, kukuha ho ako ng pambili." Sabi ko.

Pupunta na sana ako sa kwarto ng makita ko syang naka sandal sa hagdan.

He looks so serious.

Lumapit sya kay tatang at may inabot.

"Bumili na ho kayo ng madami tang"

"May gusto kapaba?" He ask.

Umiling ako.

Napabuntong hininga sya.