Truly Worthless

I walked home and tears filled my eyes just by the thought that I will never have friends. I should have just heard them out, then stay mad at them for a few days afterward accept being friends with them, at least that is what a normal person would do.

Well I guess I am not normal, I am broken physically and mentally and because of that I am pushing everyone away, I am just scared, and I want my parents and I should not think of having friends because my stepfather would never allow me so I should just forget about that.

I know It seems pathetic right now but I do not care I cried my eyes out and I took my time walking home, I forgot that my stepfather expects me to be home before him and to have lunch ready for him.

I started jogging the rest of the way home. When I got home I was immediately pushed against the wall. "Why are you home late?" My stepfather yelled at me with so much hate.

"I am sorry." That was all I was able to mumble out.

"So you have a boyfriend and you have new friends now do you not?!!!" He asked tightening his hold on me.

"No I do not have any friends and I do not have a boyfriend." I choked out.

"Do not lie to me." He yelled. Eyes blazing, he pushed me harder against the wall causing my chest to hurt, I could not breathe.

"I can not breathe." I choked out.

"like I f**king care!!!" He spat out.

"Please let me go," I begged.

He dropped me hard to the floor, from the corner of my eyes I saw an empty bottle of stout and vodka on the coffee table.

Oh no, he has been drinking. "Please you are not thinking straight, you are not in your right senses right no—" I said shaking.

"Are you trying to tell me that I am crazy, that I am out of my mind!!!!!!!" He yelled, his voice high-pitched, loud and masculine, I'm sure you could hear him from two blocks away.

"N-o!" I said shaking. I peed myself a little out of fear.

"That is what you are saying right? you killed your mother!!!! You took her life!!!", he said and looked me dead in the eye "you are a murderer!!!!! And you are telling me I am not in my right senses, you killed your mother for f*cks sake, you are the one that is not in the right sense!!!!!!!" He yelled I think I'm going to collapse from fear anytime soon.

"No, I am not!! I did not kill her!! She died in a car crash." I tried to say as he dropped me harshly to the ground.

"You caused her death!! You killed my wife, you bastard, she died because of you, you killed my wife and now you will pay..., I will kill you too." He said in a low deadly voice.

"No, please!! I did not kill her please!!!" I begged.

He grabbed an empty bottle of vodka from the coffee table and he broke it on my head, the last thing I saw was his worn-out boots right before everything went black.

****

Three hours later.

I woke up with a throbbing headache I tried to move my body but every movement sent my brain to cry out in pain, I then proceeded to touch where hurts my head.

My head felt moist, I brought my hand to look at it and what I saw startled me, blood, my head felt like it was broken into two.

I tried to move again but this time slower and made sure I made very few movements with my head, I tried standing but I could not do it, so I just made myself as comfortable as I could be in a sitting position.

My head ached badly and every tear I shed caused pain to my head. I stayed in that position for a while thinking the pain will reduce but oh boy was I wrong.

The pain was not subsiding and I knew that if I did not treat myself I would just die, I tried standing again, and as I got on my two feet trying to move one foot before the other I stumbled and I collapsed for the second time today.

*****

An hour later.

I woke up from the never-ending darkness I was in, the pain was increasing, every second and I knew that if he comes and sees my blood all over the floor, he will break more bottles on my head.

And I can not dare go to the hospital what will I tell them what happened to me? I know that he will just deny it and makeup lies about me. I tried standing up again, this time I did not wobble too much.

I stood on my two feet, while leaning on the wall, one foot after the other, I kept on saying it in my mind to keep me steady, like that I got to the kitchen, I carefully took out the first aid kit and I cleaned the blood on my face with cotton wool.

I poured spirit on the part that hurts the most on my head and I hissed out loudly in pain, tears flooded my eyes, as my heart clenched, I closed my eyes trying to tolerate the pain, I moan out loudly, I had never been in so much pain like that despite the continuous abuse, this was the worst so far.

I then went on to gently wrap my head tight with bandages with shaking hands, my body was trembling.

I removed some shards of broken glass that was on my skin and I checked carefully and slowly for cuts on my skin, luckily there were none.

I then kept the first aid kit back in its place and I proceeded in cleaning the living room as much as I could, I cleaned it slowly and carefully, taking my time, making sure I didn't move too fast so I wouldn't collapse again, all the while my head felt like someone was hitting it over and over again.

I was feeling dizzy, I forced my feet to move, my grip on the mop stick was not tight at all, at one point I was using it for support, after I finished cleaning the mess, I made dinner. I made rice and spaghetti with tomato sauce and roasted chicken, I don't know how I did it in my condition but all I know is I did it.

By the time I was done my whole body was shaking so much, I had not eaten throughout today and I am nursing an injury, the pain is horrible, I pray no one ever goes through what I'm passing through. I need the energy so I can heal properly I still have to do my report and finish my homework, so I decided to eat to my fullest as I made food for two, but I tried too quickly.

I do not want him to catch me eating, he will destroy me if he does. Once I was done I washed my dishes and went to my room, I tried to complete my physics assignment.

I was smiling by the time I was done, now all I need to do is write a summary about the novel Mr. Walter was talking about, I know it is a story I have read before, "A look Beyond."

Yes, that is the story, I love the story because it is very very similar to my life story, I then went on to summarize it, I was worried I will not be able to write it the way I would if I was not nursing an injury.

But when I started writing I could not stop but I kept in mind that I was asked to summarize the story, I wrote 10,000 words and I was very satisfied with what I wrote, instead of summarizing it, I think I might just have written part of the story but I don't think I can redo it now.

I went through it again to check for errors and spelling mistakes after I was done, it was already late, it should be around 9 pm now, I kept my books in my bag.

I decided that I will go to the library to go search for a book about cyber hacking tomorrow, so I can understand what I missed out when I zoned out during Mr. Victor's class, and look for that story."

I did not finish the book the last time I had it, Mrs. Juliet lent it to me, but I gave it back to her after that incident. But for now, I need to shower and rest.

I was happy he did not come into my room tonight, I took off my clothes and went to shower.

I was practically jubilating, maybe he wants me to heal first before he goes back to abusing me, I guess he cares for me in his way, for once I wished I was right, as soon as I got out I saw him naked on my bed with his clothes on the floor and his sex toys were on the bed.

I thought he would not come tonight, I thought wrong, he motioned for me to come closer, I knew fighting him will make my head hurt even more and he might decide to beat me as he rape me but I decided to attempt.

I pleaded with him, and he yanked the torn towel from my body and threw me on the bed, he then proceeded in doing to me as he pleases, I am just grateful that he did not hit me on my face or head. After he was done with me.

He gathered his sex toys, and clothes, and he left me naked and cold, I covered myself with the sheets as I cried myself to sleep, I am a worthless piece of shit was the last thought on my mind before the darkness took over me.

Edited.

Hey, guys I successfully updated another chapter I hope you like it, I was thinking of doing Alero's POV what do you think of it? I hope you guys love my book keep dropping comments and keep voting thanks.

Bjay_love