21

I really was surprised by everything that happened that morning. I had to admit that as I sat in the den room downstairs. It was midafternoon now, and I had been staying there while Jade and those angels figured out their next moves. Hence my current status of sitting alone and trying to occupy myself.

I wasn't complaining about this. At least it was giving me time to think over everything that I'd been seeing and hearing.

I wasn't expecting the truth I'd learned about Jade and what had happened in the past. It had changed a lot of my perception of him. I'd spent so long believing that he'd simply appeared to Faith Evans because he wanted another soul to add to his collection, but there had been so much more to it. Jade had truly wanted Faith for himself, and not just for her soul. It was because he'd cared about her. In fact, it seemed like he actually had loved her.

I still had a hard time comprehending that. Could a demon really love someone?

I had always doubted it not only for what Jade was, but also because of Saffron's twisted way of showing his so-called love. Jade had now shaken up those doubts. He'd done so much for Faith back then. Even though he would taunt her and disappear at times, he'd always tried to make amends and keep her happy. He'd even had jealous fits over Saffron's involvement with her. It made me wonder if Jade simply didn't understand how to convey love.

But now the issue of Cass and Raziel was also weighing on my mind. They were the one element in all of this that I just didn't get.

Cass was the first mystery to me. What was his end goal in all of this? He'd saved Faith Evans before, and now he was doing all that he could to stop Saffron and Jade from taking me away. He may have been the guardian angel for my soul, but that seemed a bit much to me. There had to be more to him. I just couldn't figure out what it was.

Then, there was Raziel Renaldi. I had no doubt in my mind that he'd been involved with one of my past lives. In fact, I now had the distinct feeling that it was with my previous life as Faith Kent. I'd been getting flashes from that life too, and in them, I could've sworn that I saw myself with a slightly younger looking Raziel. It seemed like he was maybe fourteen or fifteen in those fragmented memories.

But if he'd known her, then what had happened back then? Did he know that Saffron was stalking her? Was he around when Saffron killed her?

Somehow, it didn't feel that simple. Something from that time had deeply affected Raziel, and I truly was believing now that it had been much more than just losing his friend.

The sound of the door opening brought me back to reality. I looked up from where I was laid out on the couch and saw Cass coming in. I laid still, studying his appearance as he closed the door behind him.

Like Malakai, he really was a beautiful man. Dressed in white, he reminded me somewhat of what people claimed an angel could look like. My mind flashed back to Faith Evan's dreams. He'd looked a lot like that in them too. There could be no doubt that he was the same angel who visited her in those dreams.

"I thought that it would be better if I checked to see how you're doing." he said as he walked over to me.

"I'm fine, but I'm a little bored right now, and I keep worrying about my aunt." I told him. I didn't bother sitting up.

"I understand, and I can tell you that she is still alive. As for being well, unfortunately, that's another story." Cass admitted.

I watched me closely before speaking again, "So you're really him? You're my soul's guardian angel."

"I am." Cass confirmed, smiling at me. It was the first time he'd done that since I'd gotten there, and it was a bit breathtaking. He really was a beautiful angel.

I managed to keep myself cool and composed as I sat up, "Okay, I get that. But I still don't get why you're going to all of this trouble now. I guess you're regretting things too, huh?"

Cass sat down beside me, "Well, I cannot say much against that. It's been over eighty years since this all began, and this is the first time that I've been able to move since your first death. I'd dare say that I've felt pretty useless since that time." he confessed.

"Maybe you should have let Faith die when her husband tried to kill her. She would've passed into the Heavens with you." I informed him.

Yes, I'd been thinking this a lot since Noah had told me that Cass had saved her all of those years ago. I actually blamed him a little for my current situation.

"I will accept my part in blame here." Cass conceded, "But to be perfectly honest with you, I am a bit selfish too. I couldn't see her die that way, and I didn't want to part with your soul again for a period of time, as I'd been doing for centuries, so I intervened."

There it was. My first inkling to what Cass was really thinking. But it surprised me too.

"You wouldn't have seen me then?"

"Not for long. Once a soul passes into the Heavens, it is out of the guardian's hands until the soul decides to be reborn again, and, as I said, I was being a bit selfish then. I didn't want to lose your soul again, so I allowed you life, and begged for the human justice system to figure out a way to catch Leo Evans. But unfortunately, Jade got to that before me. So, in the end, some of it truly did end up being my fault, which is what brought me here. I have to make things right." Cass explained.

I looked down. That last part wasn't sitting right with me.

"Is that the only reason that you're here now?" I heard myself ask.

"Hmm? What do you mean?" Cass responded, looking confused.

"You only came here to make things right and release me because you thought that you made a mistake that caused all of this?" I clarified.

The room became very quiet. Cass remained still, looking forward like he was thinking over his answer. Then he let out a long sigh.

"Not really." he admitted, "The truth is, I needed to see you again, even if it is for one last time."

"Then why didn't you do this before? You've been watching over my soul ever since then, right? Were you really not allowed to help me?" I pushed.

Cass shook his head, "I wasn't. To be honest with you, I've had my own troubles since all of this started. As you'd imagine, my saving Faith Evans brought much scrutiny on me. But after the events with Jade and Saffron, they gave me a bit of a reprieve, and I was eventually able to convince them to allow me to come down here and try to help you. My return is doubtful though." he admitted.

Now some of this was making a little more sense. But I also realized something very important as I sat there and listened to Cass. Namely, why he acted like he did whenever he saw Jade. At first, I had thought that it was because of them being polar opposites, the light and the dark so to speak. But now, I was beginning to think that there was something more here.

However, I couldn't voice that feeling. I was too afraid. So instead, I opted to comfort this angel who was obviously was ready to make a lot of sacrifices to save me.

"I'm sorry. I guess I haven't exactly been that nice to you since I came here, but it seems like everything's been happening for so long, so I thought that maybe you had given up on me." I apologized.

"I understand, and I'm not worried about it. I don't expect you to forgive me for putting you in this situation." Cass assured me.

"I was really surprised when I came in here and saw you too. I was kind of confused at first." I continued.

Cass chuckled, "I guess it was a bit confusing, considering that I was just using Noah's body before to fight with Saffron. But it had given me enough to level with my superiors and get them to allow me to come here. Besides, I wanted a good piece of him in this flesh. I owe him for times past as well as this."

"Times past?" I noted.

"Never mind. It's nothing for you to worry about." Cass assured me, "The important thing at this time is figuring out the best way to stop Saffron from carrying things out as he's always done. Just keeping you safe here won't be enough, and given Jade's presence, we may be able to work this to our advantage. As much as I can't stand that Fallen, he does come up with good plans, and that's why I wanted to speak to you now. I believe that we may have an idea of what we can do to bring all of this to an end."

"You do?"

I could feel my heart beat a little faster. They were really getting ready to end this now. Saffron might be driven away from me forever.

But I felt an ache inside of me along with that elation. It was horrible, but there was a small piece of me that felt sad over losing Saffron. Perhaps it was that tiny piece of Faith Evans who had come to dearly love him. I knew in my heart that Saffron had been the cruelest in the end. He was the one that I had trusted the most in that life, and he'd taken that trust and murdered it. It was stupid of me to feel any sympathy for him after all he'd put me through.

Cass easily caught onto my conflicted feelings, "You know Mari, there's really nothing to be ashamed of. As Faith, you trusted Saffron even more than Jade. He's a natural user, and he always has known how to manipulate those around him into doing whatever he wants. He even did it with Jade. If he had not, he never would've been able to get out of the Abyss and into the original contract. Everything with Saffron is a twisted means to an end, even this game of cat and mouse that he's been playing with Jade." he told me.

"I feel like a terrible person inside." I whispered, "Even though I want to get away from them, there's that part of me that still cares about both of them. It's so stupid."

Cass turned and pulled me into a comforting hug. I closed my eyes as I snuggled into his embrace. There was such a comfort there, like nothing in the world could hurt me.

"It's okay for you to feel that way. It's very hard to let go of the soul's feelings, and no one is going to blame you for them. But I know that you understand what must be done, and if Jade is indeed willing to let you go, then it is time to move on and allow yourself to be saved." he gently reminded me.

I let out a long breath as I pulled back to face him, "I understand, but what can we do now? He has Aunt Farah, right?"

"He does, but we may be able to help her if everything goes well. However, it may require a bit of sacrifice on your part. You know that I won't let him kill you, don't you?" Cass responded.

I nodded. "Yes. I know that you won't, and I trust you."

"I'm glad." Cass breathed. He closed his eyes and bowed his head. I had the feeling that I'd just made his day.

"What are you all going to do? Are you going after Saffron? Is Jade?" I asked him after a moment of sitting there while he held my hands in his.

"Actually, that would be both of us." Jade answered.

We looked over to see him sitting in a chair near us.

"You couldn't just use a door, could you?" Cass complained.

"I hate using them. Besides, I wanted to see what you were going to do in here once you had to face her. This doesn't really surprise me at all though. In fact, I would've expected much more. Are you that reserved in your ways Cass?" Jade asked him.

"Not at all, but I show respect. That's more than a Fallen like yourself." Cass countered.

Jade brushed him off, "It's whatever you say. But anyway, I think that we should get on with all of this. Time is passing, and I'm certain that Saffron has already started healing."

"So what's the plan then?" I asked him.

He was right. May as well get on with this now. Hopefully this would all be over soon enough.

Cass turned back to me, "It's quite simple. What it boils down to first is sending you back to your home to bring Saffron out." he explained.

I stiffened as I heard that. Go back and bring Saffron out? By myself?

"You're kidding right?" I managed to spit out.

"Why would we do that? It's a serious matter." Jade replied.

"Because he's going to kill me." I told him.

"Don't worry my dear. We won't let that happen." Cass promised.

"Not at all." Jade agreed, "Trust me. I know Saffron better than anyone. In all of this, he's delighted in having me witness what he does. It's part of his twisted little game. So I know that he will not kill you if you go back to that house this evening. In fact, I'm willing to bet that he has other things in mind now, so you should be safe enough to lure him out for us."

"You know, you thought you knew him before, and look what happened." I reminded him.

Jade shrugged it off, "I will admit to the one folly, but I am very certain of myself this time. I won't underestimate him again."

"Either way, we won't let him hurt you, and we won't let your aunt if she is under his control. But we need you to go back and do this. It's the only way to put an end to this without destroying your eye. I'd say that would be the better option, but I really don't think so in the end. Saffron's so involved in this now that such a destruction may not even matter to him at this point." Cass admitted.

I sighed in defeat, "All right. But you're going to save me, right?" I verified.

"I intend to." Cass answered.

"I want you to promise me. I won't forgive you next time if you let me down." I told him.

Jade chuckled, "Looks like you're going to have your hands full, but remember, you were the one who wanted her in the first place." he told him.

"Just shut it." Cass muttered. He then turned his attention back to me, "Don't be afraid. I'll be there when the time comes to save you. I promise you."

I look back on this moment with more of an understanding about Cass and his motivations. In the end, he was indeed willing to give up everything for me, even his own life. Perhaps he really wasn't that different from Jade.

But at that time, I could not have understood his reasons why. It would take facing Hell to allow me that. And little did I know that I was also getting ready to face it in an ugly past.