Chapter 1

It was the feeling of the cool wind against Jaeho's face that made him open his eyes as a shiver ran down his spine.

Before him was a red sky, clouds twisted into white streaks that dissolved into the orange sun. Sand danced with the blowing wind, sticking to his clothes. His skin. His tongue. It was all around him, on the ground, in the air, no sight of anything else.

Pushing himself up from the ground, Jaeho looked around until he saw her in the distance. The skirt of her black dress swayed with the wind as her long, dark hair learned to fly, her face as beautiful as the last day he saw her.

"Hyerin!" Jaeho screamed, his arm stretching towards his sister.

Hearing her name, Hyerin smiled, her eyes holding a secret he wasn't privy to. She lifted her hand but it wasn't to reach him. Instead, it caused the wind to pick up speed, a sand story coming to life around him and all Jaeho could do was scream. He screamed for his sister who had once again left him behind. He screamed for the memories that the storm tore apart. But within the howling wind, no one could hear him cry. And as his feet hit the ground, the storm was gone.

The dying land within which he had managed to find Hyerin had disappeared as rain poured down on him, mud sticking to his jeans as he looked at two children standing before a grave. The faceless adults around them didn't move, they didn't cry. They were just there, irrelevant. In the blink of an eye, Jaeho had been forced to relive the worst day of his life.

Unable to run, unable to forget, Jaeho watched as his younger self grabbed his sister's hand, gripping it tightly.

"I'll always be with you," He promised her.

But Yumi never responded, instead she shed more tears.

"I'm sorry, Jaeho," she whimpered but he never knew why she was apologizing. She just repeated those words over and over again.

Until all Jaeho could hear was his name.

"Jaeho," someone called out to him and he turned around only to find himself alone.

"Jaeho," the voice was there again. "Jae! Wake up!"

And that's when the nightmare finally ended.

Breathing heavy, Jaeho woke up with a start and found Yumi staring at his face.

"We're going to be late for school," she stated while he stared at her wide-eyed.

"I--" he started and she raised her eyebrows, waiting for him to finish. "I'm sorry."

Jaeho knew that Yumi knew he wasn't apologizing for waking up late but she didn't say anything. She just nodded and headed out the door, already dressed for school.

Rubbing his face, Jaeho glanced at the photo on his bedside table, one where Hyerin was still alive. One where his family was still whole. A time when things were simpler. But things had changed now.

Pushing himself out of bed, knowing that there was no point in dwelling over things lost past Jaeho got ready for school as fast as he could and headed downstairs. Grabbing a piece of bread, he nodded at Yumi who was still waiting for him.

"Have a good day, you two," their mother said, dark circles under her eyes.

It had been 10 years since Hyerin had died but their mother had never recovered. From a strong and outgoing person, she had become paranoid and worried, always scared that once Jaeho and Yumi walked out the door, the two of them would never return. But after what had happened to Hyerin, she was right to be scared.

Kissing his mother's cheek, Jaeho gave her a reassuring smile before heading out with Yumi. Then, the two of them began their silent walk to school, having nothing to say to one another. There was a time when all the two of them ever knew was love and laughter. But now, Jaeho couldn't look at Yumi without feeling guilty.

He had made her a promise, one that he couldn't keep.

"Jae!" a shrill voice called out to Jaeho, making him freeze in his tracks.

Slowly Jaeho turned around to find Kim Hana waving her hand wildly as she ran towards him. He groaned internally knowing that she was going to hug him and he didn't like being touched so casually by people he wasn't comfortable around. But unlike every day, Hana just stopped a few steps away from him and instead just smiled sheepishly. It was shocking and Jaeho glanced at her brother Taekyung who just shrugged.

Maybe Hana had finally learned.

Taekyung opened his mouth to say something but stopped the moment he noticed Yumi. Their eyes met for a split second before she walked away and Taekyung's face twisted in pain.

"What's her problem?" Hana glared but the boys didn't answer, knowing that everything was their fault.

After that, the silence returned, heavier than before. Hana tried to make small talk but Jaeho wasn't in the mood, his mind on his dream. Taekyung on the other hand was busy drilling holes in Yumi's back but she never turned around to look at him. She continued to walk alone, away from people she once called family. Jaeho wanted to call out to her. He wanted to hug her tight and apologize but he didn't know how.

And before he could decide, before he could gather the courage to do the right thing, they reached school. Jaeho had once again lost his chance. Without a word, Yumi slipped away to where Jinwoo and Ayeong stood, her lips tilting into a rare smile, reserved only for the people she loved. Jaeho wasn't one of those people anymore. Hana followed after her to hug Hyungsik, her boyfriend, holding onto him while the boy looked a bit uncomfortable but that was probably because his friends were glaring at him.

"Come on, let's go we'll be late for class," Jaeho said, grabbing Taekyung's arm and dragging him away, knowing that the older boy could spend the whole day just staring at Yumi.

There was a time when the two of them would stand next to Yumi and talk to her without a care in the world. There was a time when Taekyung and her were inseparable. But that relationship had shattered because Taekyung had chosen Jaeho. Now there was rift between them that couldn't be filled.

Feeling sick to his stomach, Jaeho pushed open the door to his classroom, glad to see Jun.

"Ayeong awakened," Jun muttered as he approached his friends.

"Isn't that good?" Jaeho asked, not knowing why Jun seemed so annoyed.

"It is but she awakened before me!" he whined, lips setting into a pout as he revealed the truth. "Now I'll never hear the end of this!"

"Ayeong is like 10." Taekyung rolled his eyes. "Stop fighting with your cousin over petty things."

Jun stared at Taekyung "Ayeong is literally 16 years old. Tae, what the fuck?"

Hearing that Taekyung stared back. "Since when?"

"Since last month," Jaeho answered.

Taekyung lost himself to his thoughts. "Oh yeah. We had that party for her at the amusement park which ended with Jun almost puking on everyone. Yeah, I tried to erase that disaster of a day from my memories."

"Oh my god! Can you let it go?" Jun whined.

"I did but then you reminded me." Taekyung smirked.

As his two friends bickered, Jaeho felt the atmosphere lighten, the burden on his shoulders lifted for a while. But just as he began to feel calm, the door to the class opened and Yumi walked in, bringing with her that dreaded silence. Everyone in the class stared at her, the way they did every single morning. Everyone in the class judged her and as the silence was broken by whispers, guilt slammed into Jaeho, reminding him that this was all his fault.

While he flinched, unable to meet his sister's eyes, Yumi didn't react to the stairs, used to the judgement and the hate.

Some people looked at him, their eyes full of sympathy. They pitied him because Yumi was his sister. They pitied him because she hadn't been on his side when he was wrong. But to them right or wrong was of no consequence. It was only the rumours that they believed in. Who wanted the truth when a sob story was so much better?

Taking out her books, Yumi sat in her seat as the bell rang and the teacher walked in. But Jaeho couldn't concentrate in class. He kept glancing at his sister, wondering if things would have been better if he just walked up to her. If he talked to her in class, people would back off right? But then he remembered what Hana told him and he felt his throat go dry. People wouldn't back off. Instead, they would misunderstand him. Hate him.

He didn't know if he could deal with that. If he could be as strong as Yumi. So for now, things were better this way.

┈┈┈┈․° ☼ °․┈┈┈┈

Taekyung for it impossible to concentrate during class, his mind overflowing with thoughts. Every morning was hard but this one had been particularly rough. Now, sitting in the class instead of heading out for lunch break with the rest of his classmates, Taekyung glances out of the window and looked at the track field.

There Yumi was, practicing with the track team.

One minute her feet were on the ground and the next she was jumping over a pole, looking at the sky. Taehyung sat on the edge of his seat and groaned as the pole fell to the ground, her jump still not perfect. He knew she had been practicing hard for days, getting better little by little and he knew how frustrated she was as she rubbed her face, trying to catch her breath. There was so much he wanted to say to her to make her feel better but instead he looked away. He no longer had the right to comfort her so instead he focused on his food.

┈┈┈┈․° ☼ °․┈┈┈┈

Yumi lay on the mat, breathing hard and staring up at the sky. Since the morning, she had felt under the weather. There was a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach, fear and anticipation filling her heart as though something was about to happen. Something horrifying. Something wonderful. But she couldn't place her finger on it. So, instead, she decided to throw herself into practice, anything to get her mind off the negative thoughts.

"You know you need to eat," Ayeong said walking up to her, hair turning from black to red.

"I'm not hungry," Yumi said but Ayeong wasn't having it.

"You've been at this the whole day. I don't care if you're hungry or not, you have to eat." Ayeong was dragging Yumi off the mat when something happened.

For a second, Yumi couldn't breathe, the world around her disappearing until all she could see was white. In that nothingness, there he was standing, a few feet away from her. Their eyes met and finally, she could breathe again, colours spreading around him like wildfire. They danced and sang, blending into the white canvas like paint in water, moving to the rhythm of her heartbeat. And he stared at her, eyes wide, mesmerized.

In that moment, everything was forgotten. Each painful memory, every cruel word disappearing with the world. Lifting her hand, she reached for him but the spell broke and he moved away, shattering the illusion.

Taekyung was leaving her once again.

What was meant to be a peaceful awakening turned to pain as the world around her roared back to life, the silence ripped apart with voices, thoughts she couldn't hear before but were now ringing in her head.

"Are you okay?" Ayeong asked but Yumi backed away, grabbing her head.

Unable to handle the stares of the people watching, head feeling like it would split open, she ran away, going as fast as her feet could carry her. She ran and ran until a pair of arms surrounded her.

"Shhhh, you're okay," Jinwoo whispered, blessing her with the sweetest of visions.

"I'm scared," Yumi cried and he hummed, stroking her back. "I don't want to be alone. Tae, I'm so scared."

And she chanted his name, delirious and lost in a memory that was better left forgotten. Maybe when she woke up, she would pretend this never happened but Jinwoo wouldn't forget. He couldn't. So instead he would make Taekyung pay.