The Rolling Begins
"Greetings, King James."
I swear I just blinked… and opened my eyes to a void of blinding light. Whatever voice echoed through the endless depths was taking the piss. Or maybe I was just dreaming…
"To think that one of such extraordinary talent could have fallen so low. Struck with such misfortune, you called out to me… and, I, being the omnibenevolent being that I am, have answered."
"You're God?"
I was tripping. I had to be… there was no fucking way God gave two shits.
"Not quite the God you believe in but this small matter is hardly relevant as of now. I offer you the opportunity to live up to your name… The opportunity to truly be King. The opportunity to gain fame, wealth and power beyond your dreams. Will you take it, King James?"
"What's the catch?"
"As with all opportunities, nothing is for certain… you can rule all matter under the heavenly sky or crumble in earthly soil. What do you say, King James? You can choose to take this opportunity or return to your failing and unfulfilling life. You can try and salvage your life, sure…-"
"I'll take it." I spoke with conviction. Honestly, I had nothing left. Whatever this opportunity was, it sounded very promising and better than whatever I had going for me. "Fuck Caroline the stupid slag, fuck my useless dad, fuck all those neeks at my school, fuck GCSE'S, fuck bending down and acting like people want me to, fuck the world… I want to be KING!"
I heard a chuckle echo through the void.
"... I was right to choose you."
And so, my new life began.
…
[King's System: Welcome to the throne room, my liege. I hope you find your accommodations befitting.]
'What accommodations!?'
James looked around, seeing an endless field of grass. The only things of note were those before him, most prominently a set of large rocks clumsily put together to form something resembling a chair. 'Resembling' was putting it lightly, though… it didn't even look sittable. In front of the 'throne' was a one foot tall fence which was made of smaller rocks and formed a shabby square frame. The only thing James found somewhat appealing was the beautiful blue sky.
"You call this a fucking throneroom? All I see is some rocks thrown together…"
[King's System: The throne room scales to your progress in regards to the might of your vassals, your fame, the lands which you have conquered and the like… so far, you have achieved nothing. Therefore, it is suitable for you.]
'... Vile.' James stroked his chin. "So… you're like an interface, right? Am I a video game character or something?"
[King's System: You may view it that way, my liege, certainly. I was assigned to be your guide throughout your journey and the bridge between you and God. If you have any inquiries, feel free to ask and I will give the most helpful answer I am allowed to. Of course, while I am almost all-knowing due to His blessing, there are matters which I am forbidden to share with you. I'm sure you understand.]
"Alright, sure. What am I doing here, though?"
[King's System: As previously stated, this is your throne room. This is where all your vassals will be summoned and stored… if you choose to keep them. Speaking of vassals, you have been given the blessing of summoning characters from across the multiverse into your service. These summonings are entirely random, although you will be able to choose between the male and female pools.]
"Across the multiverse… so like, real people? Fictional too?"
[King's System: Indeed, my liege.]
"Man like Optimus Prime?"
[King's System: Yes.]
"... Napoleon Bonaparte? Taylor Swift?"
[King's System: Yes to all.]
"Hmm… but getting what I want would be extremely unlikely, given that the pool to choose from would be vast. Right?"
[King's System: Precisely. However, with certain achievements, you may be granted a super roll which is suited to your tastes. These superrolls tend to have extremely useful vassals and it is unlikely that you would deny any of them. There will also be a store from which vassals of varying quality are available for sale. Of course, the higher the quality of the vassals, the more expensive they are. They may only be purchased through roll shards which are given whenever you reject a roll or completely dismiss a vassal.]
"So that's to beat the random factor… alright, I can work with that. Speaking of rolls, how does the process work?"
[King's System: You will see… now.]
[Starterpack received… +1 super roll!]
[Rolling…]
[From the Anime known as Bleach…]
'Anime? I know fuck all about that…' James scratched his hair.
The skies darkened as grey, ominous clouds emerged. James looked up and his eyes widened as he observed a beam of light disperse the clouds around it… shining down on the center of the stone frame. James was surprised as he found himself being able to look upon the radiant light without turning away. The light from above slowly dispersed all the way down, revealing a beautiful figure.
James' eyes widened as he took a closer look. She had the appearance of a slender, youthful and beautiful woman with long black hair that was adorned at the back by a large golden ornament. This ornament took the shape of a crescent moon, radiating numerous lines outwards. She had six golden skeletal artificial hands attached to her back which moved at her whim. She was pretty short even compared to James' teenager self.
[Senjumaru Shutara, Divine General of the North and Fourth Officer of the Zero Division.]
'GYAAAT… that's a baddie for sure.'
"Hey sexy." He grinned, tilting his head slightly. "Welcome to my… throneroom. It's a bit shabby at the moment but it'll be the most wonderful place in existence soon enough."
"You are not one to be shy, it seems." Senjumaru remarked, taking a closer look at James. As he was, he had medium-length golden hair and brilliant baby blue eyes with an almost perfectly symmetrical face. He had a fit figure for his age, resembling the footballers he aspired to surpass. "James, is it?"
"You can call me King James." James smiled, nodding. "So… you're my first vassal. What is it that you're capable of doing? Those golden hands look pretty useful."
"I suppose you'll have to see for yourself, won't you?" Senjumaru smiled slightly, speaking with a rather playful tone.
'Me gusta…'
[Would you like to keep Senjumaru Shutara?]
James nodded.
[Then your journey shall begin at last.]
~
I opened my eyes to the new world, seeing it for the first time.
"It's a healthy boy!"
"Let me see…"
A rather regal looking middle-aged man took me into his arms and managed a smile as he tapped my nose. I didn't make much of an expression so then he began to tickle me and I let out a laugh.
I was a baby… a fully conscious one, at that!
That means I had to pretend to be one, right?
"There, there…" The man chuckled as he raised me higher. "I present my youngest son, the Seventh Prince of the Blue Wind Empire! His name shall be…"
"Chao… Cang Chao." The woman who seemed to have given birth to me spoke. "He who leaps over and surpasses all. The prince who will make your ambition come true… and strengthen the Blue Wind Imperial Family to heights it has never seen before. Won't you, my son?"
I knew fuck all in regards to what they were saying… it didn't sound English, that was for sure.
Though, I did take note of 'Cang Chao'. It sounded like a name. Isn't that the first thing people do when children are born, name them? I couldn't shake my head and ask to be called James, could I?
I nodded with absolute certainty.
"... Cang Chao it is!"
The man who I assumed was my father eagerly agreed.
~
I was born as Cang Chao, the Seventh Prince of the Blue Wind Empire. Always wanted to be royalty… so it was like a dream come true, in all honesty. I despised being poor and lowly which is one of the reasons why I strived to be a footballer in the first place. It wasn't the main reason, though. I wanted to be a superstar… known across the world and loved by the masses. No, it wasn't just a desire I had out of a whim. I was born and raised to be one.
And now… I had a stage to shine from and prove it.
"Agoo-goo-gaga…"
… One step at a time.
"Aren't you adorable, my dear?" My mother smiled, stroking my head before handing me over to another woman who looked like a maid. "Be nice to her for me."
Again, I had no idea what the fuck any of them were saying. Though, I had a better idea when the maid showed her bare breast and moved my head towards it.
'Breastfeeding… ya'll don't have bottles!?'
I wanted to cry at first, pouting slightly.
I never sucked a breast… 'xcept for Caroline but that's another matter entirely. That was romantic and all that. I had no attachment to this woman!
"Hmm… he doesn't seem too eager. Maybe it's better if you were to do it, my lady."
She turned to my mother… that could quite possibly be worse!
Knowing that I needed that milk for my future growth, swallowed my pride and sucked them tiddies like a champ. To become a superstar, I needed to get past the baby stage, obviously.
"Oh-" The maid chuckled. "That was sudden."
*Suck*… *suck*… *suck*…
From hesitant… to shameless, I became a little greedy and swallowed as much as I could.
To my baby self, that shit tasted like nectar of the gods.
----------------
Name: Cang Chao / 'King' James
Race: Human
Titles: Seventh Prince of the Blue Wind Empire
Age: 0
Cultivation strength: Non-existent
----------------
Miracle Growth: 'King's Fame'
-The more well-known you are (in a negative or positive light) and the greater number of admirers that you have, the easier it is to breakthrough.
Side ability: Charm I (1)
-You have a natural charm that very few can compete with, giving you the ability to sway people to your side in many situations. The more you successfully use this ability, the more effective it becomes. Extra effective against those of the opposite gender.
----------------
King's Vassals
1: Senjumaru Shutara
----------------
Rolling System
Roll count: 1 (basic)
Roll shards: 0
Rank: Bronze
Requirements for next rank: Elementary Profound Realm
Rank Benefits: 1 roll per 60 days, limit of 1 summoned vassal at a time and limit of 3 total vassals.
----------------
After sixty days, I got my first ordinary roll.
The throneroom looked as shabby as ever… except there was a wooden baby crib with a bottle of milk inside of it alongside a brown teddy bear. Very funny. Also, instead of having my original body, I was a baby.
Senjumaru Shutara stood beside me, raising her long sleeve over her face.
"You think it's funny, don't you?" I raised an eyebrow, pouting slightly. "Fuck you."
"I admit, it is rather amusing." Senjumaru chuckled. "Your skill at sucking is rather proficient from what I have observed."
"Shut up and pick me up. I can't stand with these shitty baby legs."
"Of course, my King."
After speaking in a rather sarcastic tone, two of her golden skeletal hands moved forward and held me up.
"You intend to summon a second vassal?"
"Well… summon, yes… but keep? That all depends on who appears. I can only have three, as of now, it seems. Not a single spot should be wasted." I replied, shaking my head.
"If you find three who you deem superior to me, you will send me away?" She questioned.
"I mean… yes? It would be the logical thing to do in regards to my future. Though, you look like a very special person. I doubt it will ever come to that."
"You are right about that." She smiled, nodding her head. "Go on, my 'King', use your summon. Even I can't help but wonder who you will bring forward."
"System… go roll! Bring forward a vassal worthy of serving me!"
[King's System: Very well, my liege. Will it be male or female?]
"Uhh… female, I guess."
[Rolling…]
A slightly dim green light shot from the skies above, crashing into the center of the stone frame.
[From the Game known as Fire Emblem: Three Houses…]
'What the fuck is a Fire Emblem? That wanker Rokas would probably be the type of guy to know…'
As the green light dispersed, a rather pretty woman with green hair emerged from it. She didn't look nearly as impressive as Senjumaru to James… a bit disappointing.
[Sitri.]
'That's it? Sitri?' I frowned slightly. "Welcome."
[King's System: Believe me, it could be worse, my liege… it could most certainly be worse.]
'It could be better, too.'
[King's System: Do you wish to dismiss this vassal?]
'No, not until I get something better. It would be stupid to not give her a chance.'
"What a wonderful child…" Her green, grass-like, eyes glowed as she stepped forward. "I hardly knew my child before death took me away."
"... You died in childbirth?" I questioned.
"Not quite… my liege. The child which I gave birth to did not have a beating heart and so, I did what any loving mother would do and did all I could to ensure the child's survival. That… led to my own sacrifice. I don't regret that decision… although, I do regret that I did not see my child grow up."
That story… it hit me differently. It was a critical hit. My mother was the most precious thing in the world to me and she did not live to see me reach my full potential, either.
"Are you crying?" Senjumaru raised an eyebrow as she observed.
"No… someone must be cutting onions." I sniffled. "Regardless, I, King James have elected to keep you in my service for now."
"I will do my best to serve you, my liege." She lowered her head courteously. "Though, I will not lie and say that I have the best martial prowess."
"You seem sweet enough." I smiled slightly. "You can make this place more colourful."
"As you wish."
I was lying if I said I was 100% certain of her staying long-term… I only had one spot left, after all.
…
[From Yuuki Yuuna wa Yuusha de Aru: Hanayui no Kirameki…]
A grey light pierced the sky.
'Nigga what the fuck is that long ass name?'
[Sekka Akihara!]
'Dismissed.'
It was a petite, decent-looking, young girl. She was not my type.
…
[From The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess…]
'YOOO… I'VE HEARD OF ZELDA! Is it the princess!?'
A grey light pierced the sky.
And… out came a hideous, green goblin-like creature with glowing red eyes and horns where a person's ears would be.
[Bulbin!]
"That is NOT a female, you goofy, deceiving, system."
Senjumar Shutara couldn't help but laugh. "Hahahah… this is your newest vassal? Oh my, quite the beautiful lady."
"Ello, my liege." The Bulblin lowered his head. "I look forward to serving you."
"Shut the fuck up." I frowned. "Get the fuck out of my throneroom and return to whatever cave you came from you vile creature."
He vanished into grey particles.
I sighed, shaking my head.
"Why am I so unlucky?"
"Well, you still have us…" Sitri added.
And I wanted more… that was my nature.
…
[From Hololive…]
A blue light pierced the sky and out came a girl with moderately long dark, braided hair and beautiful pinkish-red eyes. She had black horns which stood upright. She also had large fluffy ears which were similar to a fox's. Or was it a goat's? I had no fucking idea.. Not an animal expert.
[Kyoumo Gyoza!]
Considering the rolls I was getting, she was decent.
"I look forward to serving you, my liege." She lowered her head and smiled. Her smile was pretty… so I nodded.
"Welcome."
Though, in the future, one of my two newest additions might have to get thanos snapped… I knew that full well.
…
[From Fujiko no Kimyou na Shosei-jutsu -Howaitosuneiku no Gosan-...]
'Yeah… okay.'
A grey light pierced the sky.
A nerdy looking girl with freckles and some weird ass eyebrows.
'No thanks.'
…
[From Metal Slug…]
A green light pierced the sky.
[The Memphis Bomb Princess…]
[Eri Kasamoto!]
Out came a rather… bold woman. She had blonde hair, brown eyes along with notable assets across her slender body. Most notably, she wore a green bandana on her head, a green vest and a white tank top which brought out her chest rather well. She also wore green short shorts which revealed most of her legs.
She held a glock in her hand, too… a GLOCK.
She looked like a woman who could fight.
"So you are 'King James', huh…" Eri Kasmaoto tilted her head. "Pleasure to meet you."
I glanced at Sitri and Kyouma Gyoza, silently picking between them in my head…
"With great sorrow, I must announce a dismissal…" I glanced at Sitri. "Sorry."
[Are you sure you wish to release Sitri?]
Yes.
Holy shit… this was going to get HARD unless I started getting my rank up. Just 3 people… what if I really had to dismiss someone I was truly fond of? I can't keep summoned vassals standing around, right?
[King's System: Indeed, you cannot. However, no one said that you had to immediately use any rolls you gain, my liege. They may be stored and accumulated indefinitely.]
Oh… okay.
I was addicted, though. Addicted to the point that I couldn't resist rolling as my baby months continued to pass.
…
[Olga Talm…]
Fuck off.
[Mao Asakura…]
Fuck off.
[Haruko Daichi…]
Fuck off.
[Ocoho…]
No.
[Magical Girl Riruru.]
No.
[Sakurako Miyagawa]
Mid.
…
With all the disappointing female summons, I decided to use my 2nd birthday's roll on the male pool because why not? It's not like I had much to lose.
[Christophe Giacometti…]
Bro… look at this goofy goober. Hell nah.
I dismissed him immediately and earned my tenth roll shard.
"Yo, when does the marketplace open?"
[King's System: Once you reach the Platinum rank, my liege.]
'... Fuck me.'
[King's System: I believe it's better this way as you would have gathered enough shards by then to purchase something to your liking instead of drooling and coping about not being able to purchase anything of note.]
'Didn't have to do me like that.'
I decided to do the wise thing and save my rolls after that, defeating my rolling addiction… or, at the very least, golding it back. From my experience, all the shitters emerg from a grey light, the below average ones from a green light, the decent ones from a blue light and Senjumaru from gold. There might be several tiers between or above… but I took note of this regardless. There was certainly a pattern going on here.
Then… I found out that cultivating before the profound veins properly developed was detrimental to one's future. Even more waiting ensued… but I used that time to do other things such as studying the world, making connections and standing out amongst my peers. It was only natural.
~
Ten years later…
James took his first steps forward into the true way of cultivation.
'Here we go.'
A deep, profound, breath began it all.