LOSING MY MIND

I breathed heavily after I was out of the restaurant. I got into my car and signaled my driver to move.

"I knew it. It was suspicious from the start, the way this Easy Logistics entered my office. The sudden appearance of this unknown man, a handsome man " I grinned as his face flashed.

"No ....Don't fall for his looks!" I restrained myself.

I remembered a few faces looking at me, when I entered his office with Nate. I knew something's doubtful. I wanted to face him eye to eye, but his gorgeousness caught me off guard.

Yet I managed to find he was sent by someone, a bait for me! Who could it be? But he did me no harm ? What is his motive? What does he want from me?

I sighed.

"I'll know about it tomorrow. I should be cautious and be prepared for tomorrow's date! I should let him spill the truth!" I made up my mind, and directed my driver to go home.

As I walked inside my house, I was stopped in the living room by my mom, "Ash….Where were you? I need to talk….."

I looked at her, my insides throbbing to utter the words, 'Do you really care about me?' but I restrained myself.

"What are you looking at…..Sit..!" she commanded.

'Tch… As if…' it hurts knowing she didn't care but something else made her to ,"What's it?" I questioned sitting on the couch.

'Why didn't you tell me about Noah's reappearance?'

"Does that matter?" I turned my head in dismay.

'What did he tell? Why was he here after a decade? What does he want?' she kept questioning.

"Will you stop it mom? I don't give a damn about him, just go on with your usual routine!" I stood up annoyed.

'If not for him, your father wouldn't be in this state and what are you? Aren't you the daughter who should avenge your father? Noah can't come near our territory. Do you get that? And I won't allow you near him. Don't try to revive any feelings that have been buried years ago!' she warned as I walked towards the stairs.

My face emotionless. I moved up the staircase. My mind went blank as I opened my door and sauntered inside my room, plopping on the bed. My hands grabbed the sheets, my heart felt heavy, my throat dried by those words, Don't revive any feelings!

My eyes welled up. My lips quivered by the pain caused by her words. I closed my eyes letting the tears fall on the sides.

I am clueless and I feel like a fool to have little knowledge about the incident. I couldn't remember and I feel lonely whenever I am cast aside regarding this, yet I am blamed for everything.

I fired up by the sudden blast, from my bed, I felt hard to breathe and I calmed realizing that it was a dream. This nightmare, the incident years ago I don't remember a thing, Whom should I ask? Everyone of them was replaced and I have none, who could tell me what really happened then? I thought hard, 'Except the one!' My body shivered.

Or maybe I should ask the one, that detective mom hired. No he may inform her. I should ask for Nate's help, to find out each and every minute details of the incident without letting anyone know that I'm investigating my father's brutal accident and my engagement with Noah, which seems to be a conspiracy for his accident.

Was he involved? I mean, then why would he ask for my hand in marriage? If his intention was to kill my father, he could have done it anywhere, not that my father had much security. And what's the point in breaking off the engagement after he was blamed for the whole thing?

  If so, he could have married me, acted like he cared for us, or he could have done things using me. But he did neither of them, which means he can't be the one, I can't suspect him! Then who is it? What was the plan? Who is playing us? Why do I feel like I'm being dragged into a rabbit hole?

"Ah...My head spins!" I held my temples and closed my eyes. "Not knowing the truth is worse than this nightmare!" I exasperated, I could do it, I took the phone from the side table and called Nate's number, but ended the call, after I saw the time was 2 am in the morning and texted Nate to find out about my engagement with Noah.

I was wide awake. I was always insomniac for 10 long years despite the lost memory of the event, the fragments kept emerging in my dreams like puzzle pieces and I have only a few pieces to solve it. Though I secretly tried to investigate, somehow something came in, that prevented me from knowing the fact. Not anymore. Not this time.

  His reappearance has stirred up a lot of commotion. And that too showing up suddenly after so many years, creates suspicion and peril for those linked to the event. So I should be careful, I should be the first to learn about this incident, his plans, that keep haunting me.

  And also the reason behind Noah's showing up now. He must have decided to show up after planning everything. But his proposal to marry me is something I couldn't understand. What could be his motive? Why would he want to? Is he still single? Is he in love with me? Do I have feelings for him? I thought I was attracted to him for his godly look! Damn! I don't even understand what love is, but I worry if he is in love! Ah! I am losing my mind. I groaned.