Love is weird

"Hey," Erion started as we walked down the palace hallways. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"About what?" I asked.

"Everything…" He sighed. "Everything about earlier, my father and Alis seemed to know."

What is this? Does he really feel left out?

"Oh, that? I'm sorry, there wasn't any time." My gaze went to the floor, guilty conscience running down on me.

"I understand. Just..." The prince paused. "Never mind, it's fine."

Erion chuckled. When I turned to him, his eyes contradicted his actions.

I returned to looking ahead.

"I guess the three of you are going to join me in this mission."

"Obviously," The black-haired prince snickered. "We go where you go."

"Then I guess I can't stop you on that." I couldn't help but smile.

"Of course, the four of us are going to be the founding members." His voice was filled with excitement. "How many people do you need?"

"The Emperor said that it should be less than ten."

Erion stopped and when I turned to him, his fingers were on his chin.

"I know just the right people." His onyx eyes were lit with brightness.

I crossed my arms. "And how will you get these people to join us?"

The prince raised a brow at me and smirked. "All it takes is the right bribe-"

"Are you kidding me?"

Erion laughed and threw his hands in the air. "Relax, I'm just joking. Don't worry. You can count on me with this. You can just relax and think about your lovely lover."

I felt my cheeks heat up. "We are not a couple."

"But you like him?"

My eyes shifted to the ground. "Yes."

"Oh…"

There was a stretch of silence. I lifted my gaze at him. His expression was hard to read.

"What?"

Erion blinked. "I was just teasing you, alright? I didn't expect that you'd say it."

I rolled my eyes. "It's not like I'm trying to hide it."

As I turned my back and continued to walk, Erion caught up beside me.

"So what's it like?" he asked, his hands went to the back of his head.

"What is?"

"To like someone," Erion replied casually.

I sighed. "Do I really have to answer that?"

"Why not? It's still a long walk to my mother's quarters after all. Come on, humor me for a bit." I could imagine him grin from ear to ear.

How did we get into this situation again?

"Fine, but just this once,"

"I am honored." Erion teased.

"Well…" I thought about the things I felt every time I was with Sein. "It feels like my chest is always about to explode when I see him."

"Your heart aches at the sight of him? You should go see a doctor then."

I glared at him. "I thought we were going to do this?"

Erion smiled apologetically. "Sorry, couldn't stop myself. Go on."

"I feel like crying whenever I'm with him."

"Whoa whoa, stop." Erion heaved in a deep breath. "Are you sure you're in love? Why don't we sit down and think twice about this, hmm?"

I just stared at him with empty eyes. His crow-black eyebrows shot upwards as he mouthed 'What?'.

"I like him because he makes me feel at ease whenever I talk to him. He may look cold and sly when I look at him from a distance, but when I approach him all the ice around him just melts away. He's reliable, kind…" I shrugged. "You know what, he's everything nice."

"When did you realize that you fell for him?"

"I'm not sure. It's just… one day I woke up and my eyes were endlessly searching for him."

Erion snorted. "Wow, you're awfully whipped for him."

"How about you then?"

I wasn't just going to let this be all about me. This felt like a girl talk, only that I was with a boy.

The prince scoffed. "I'm already way past all that youth stuff."

"You're talking like an old man." When you're just a year older than me… "Don't old men have love experiences of their own?"

Erion scratched his head, the other went to his pocket. "Okay, you got me." He let out a breath. "There was one."

"Was?"

"You could say that it was only fleeting." He gave out a subtle laugh.

"Who is she?"

"I'm not about to name her now, okay?"

"Whatever. I don't know a lot of people anyway."

"We'll never know. Maybe you did know her." He chuckled. "I didn't just like her. I loved her. Every day was all sunshine and rainbows when she's around. She had a way that made her stand out in any crowd."

I looked at him and I saw that his eyes were distant and… so full of sorrow. The way he spoke was as if this person was now very far away and out of reach.

"Did she reject you?"

"No, I knew that she had feelings for me too."

'Then why do you look like you're in so much pain?'

He seemed to have read my mind when he said,

"She died."

My feet stopped. I didn't know what to say.

"I'm sorry, Erion."

The prince laughed, but his eyes didn't. "It's alright. It was a long time ago. Four months ago, maybe?"

My brows met. "Four months is not 'a long time ago'."

The sides of his lips tugged faintly. "I know."

I willed myself to continue walking, and so did he.

After a few seconds of quietness, he spoke. "I guess our ways of affection are different."

"How so?"

"I didn't really feel the emotions you described earlier. For me, it was more like always wanting to be there for her. But sometimes I also feel like all I could do was just to stare at her from a distance."

"You sound like a stalker at that last part."

Erion finally let out a real laugh. "Maybe I was."

I couldn't help but to giggle. 

"Do you still love her?"

"Yes, and I don't think I'll ever stop."

"Have you ever considered the fact that maybe the right one might just be out there?"

The prince fell silent for a moment.

"Someone who doesn't die? I'd like that."

I groaned. "Do you really have to joke about everything?"

Erion only cocked his head backwards. I can't help but think that maybe he just deals with his sadness by making fun of them.

Then he switched the topic so effortlessly. "Love is weird isn't it?"

"Mmm. Different for everyone else but, all the same."

The prince beside me cracked out a laugh. "You should be a love scholar."

"No thanks, I've got my own problems to deal with."

A whole empire threatened by war, that is.