As Alluring As It Is Forbidden

"Shen Chi is back in China," Mrs. Tang, the family chef informed Shen Shu as she snacked on orange by the kitchen island.

The other half of Shen Shu's orange slipped from her fingers, dropping to the floor. Her eyes widened as she stared at Mrs. Tang.

Shen Chi…

Part of her was elated to hear about his return, while the other part of her was apprehensive. He was adamant about going to Russia, and he had been gone for over a year.

So why was he back?

Shen Shu understood his reasons for leaving.

Shen Chi was an orphan named Niko from Russia until her father brought him to their home. When she first saw him, he looked as if the world had already sniffled the light from him and left nothing but the cold and dark. A shadow cast over him over the years, and it tore him from the inside. Shen Shu always wondered if her father pulled him from a situation that made him that way. She never knew his whole story.

When Niko came, he only knew Russian and some English.

He called her Cat the first time he saw her. She never understood why until he pointed at her hair and eyes. That's when it clicked. Shen Shu's black hair and yellow-green eyes reminded him of a cat. So that's what he'd call her.

Shen Shu's father hired Niko, a tutor, to teach him Mandarin and to practice his speech and language, but he'd only stare and stay quiet and fall behind on his lessons.

She tried to speak to him, too, but he'd never understood what she'd say. He'd only tilt his head and look at her with wide fascination, and when he'd try to respond and couldn't, he'd grow frustrated and silent again.

That's when she tried to speak to him with her body language. She communicated with the sign of my hands and gestures. It worked whenever she asked him if he'd want to play, watch a movie, or do something—anything. He'd always been alone, and she did not want that for him.

One day, she brought home some textbooks from the library: Mandarin for Beginners.

Shen Shu splayed it out on a table opposite of Niko, and he looked at them cautiously. Her chest constricted at his sincere expression.

She then began teaching him the basics, and his face fell while looking at the logograms, the characters of the text. He looked as if he'd given up on the spot!

But Shen Shu was patient. Instead, she began with pronunciation tones and syllables and the different pitches to convey different meanings. Niko looked at her, lost and despondent until she spoke a sentence in butchered Russian.

He faced Shen Shu with wide eyes. She bit back a smile as she explained to him that she was trying to learn his language to not be alone in this. He stared at her with wonderment and then began to practice the syllables.

For months, Shen Shu and Niko worked slow and patiently until they could exchange words and sentences that they understood. When they spoke an entire conversation, his in Mandarin, hers in Russian, Shen Shu was so happy she threw her arms around him.

Niko froze when she enveloped him with her warmth. She realized then, whatever horrors he faced, he may not have wanted her touch. She was about to back away when he finally stretched his arms and hugged her back. She swore since then that she'd work hard to see him thrive.

Eventually, Niko gained the confidence to learn from a real tutor. He worked with his tutor in the mornings as we spoke Russian in the afternoon.

Her parents were elated to hear him speak and learn. But they were not too pleased to find out Shen Shu picked up a language they did not understand, mainly because when she and Niko were up to something or wanted to tell each other secrets, it'd always be in Russian.

Once Niko had a good understanding of Mandarin and Hanzi, he began to learn other subjects.

He studied like madness. It became his addiction, and whenever he was not learning, he'd join Shen Shu in art or watching films. Everything they did, they did together.

Then one day, her parents took them out to a special dinner and announced that they were adopting Niko into the family. He'd permanently stay, and he'd be Shen Chi.

Shen Shu was delighted for him. Her father recognized him. Niko became part of the family. He got everything he wanted. But another part of her was troubled by it…because Shen Shu could not bring herself to call Niko her brother.

And yet, everyone believed he was, as he publically went by Shen Chi.

"Shen Shu?" the chef—Mrs. Tang—called to her.

Shen Shu broke out of her daze and looked at Mrs. Tang, "Sorry. Yes, you were saying?"

"Shen Chi has been back for two months…"

"Two months?" She questioned. But he has not seen us…sought me out. "How do you know?"

Mrs. Tang leaned down and whispered, "One of my friends saw him at a farmer's market in the lower town. He was alone."

"Was your friend certain it's him?"

"She works here and says she saw him come once a week, and no one else has his frame, his eyes."

Hm. Indeed. Niko was half-Chinese with black hair and angular eyes, but his irises were as grey as some of the coldest regions in Russia. He was taller than average height, and some of his features resembled those from Eastern Europe. If he came back and went into hiding, it would not take long for someone to recognize him.

But was there a reason to hide?

Unless…

"Do you think he's here temporarily and did not want anyone knowing about it?" Shen Shu asked Mrs. Tang.

She frowned at her. Mrs. Tang has been working for my family for as long as she can remember. She knew Niko as well as she knew Shen Shu. She then smiled slightly. "I hope that whatever he's doing. He will come to see us."

Mrs. Tang missed him.

Shen Shu missed him…

When they were younger, they were inseparable. Niko held her hands. He'd hug her tight whenever she was sad, and he soothed her to sleep. That all changed when Shen Shu got older, as she started making new friends and wear pretty dresses. He got distracted by his schoolwork and martial arts, and he'd been distant from her since. Shen Shu never understood why he shut her out.

But Niko was a grown man now. He could do whatever he wanted with whomever he wanted. He never visited or called, and that's all she needed to know to see where she stood in his life.

Shen Shu was nothing to him.

She then slipped from my chair, picked up the rest of the orange she dropped on the floor and threw it into the compost. "I will see you later, Mrs. Tang," she said, as she waved goodbye.

Mrs. Tang waved Shen Shu away.