103. Harem Protagonists Must Die

Suddenly, Han De got an eerie feeling. A feeling that he should visit the nearest massage parlor, as soon as possible!

'Could this be… the famous cultivator's intuition?'

It was supposed to be a tongue-in-cheek excuse, but in reality, Han De was right. It really was the cultivator's intuition.

Unfortunately, he was not aware of this fact. In his mind, blowing up a mountain was doable, because that was simply spiritual energy interacting with the environment in a certain way. Intuition though, was a nebulous concept. It required one to trust their own gut, which was something against Han De's nature. To him, the so-called cultivator's intuition was complete nonsense. Probably.

Han De had inspected the maps of the convoy already and knew there was a city nearby. Though the map was unmarked, Han De immediately bestowed the name City A to that city.

'North-west-ish? Shouldn't be that far…'

In reality, any city or settlement would do the trick as long as they had the required services. While he kept his eyes open for signs of human life, a tiny sliver of energy interrupted his thoughts.

'Hmm? S#$%, it's getting closer… but also getting weaker? It's not a person that's for sure, is it a treasure? Surely a treasure can't rain down from the… sky...'

Treasure rain could mean only one thing. An MC was, is, or will be nearby. Han De matched his direction with the fading sliver of energy and followed from behind. Taking the treasure for himself was out of the question, obviously. His purpose was purely observational.

According to his previously created 'How to Handle Xianxia Treasures 101' guidelines, it was best to identify an unattended treasure first. An MC would move in mysterious ways. When or how they would claim the treasure was impossible to predict. Sometimes it would be instant, sometimes it would take centuries. Identification of the treasure was the crucial first step for establishing MC's origins.

Most of Han De's rules for MC-related treasures could be summarized as Don't Touch It. A little rarer version was Don't Ever Touch It. A select few were Don't F#$%#$ Touch It Ever. There was one version that involved life or death scenarios, and it ended with Put It Back After Use.

The flying treasure left Han De behind and touched down after a minute-long flight. The terrain was mostly flat and green. If Han De wasn't going after the treasure, he wouldn't have noticed that the land beneath him had patches of farmland scattered around. The area that the treasure landed had some ant-like dots. He realized those were humans after sending his spiritual sense towards them.

"Heh, this trash was weaker than I thought. Who knew he couldn't even take one punch! Hehe..."

"Brother Chun, won't the elder scold us for killing him?"

"Hahaha, are you an idiot?! The elder may even reward us, we might get double the rewar-..."

Han De filtered the rest of the conversation away due to the sheer awe he was feeling right now.

'Holy F#$%#$ S#$%… A treasure fell down from the sky because this guy was in trouble?! Damn, dat express cheat delivery...'

Han De only needed one look. One look, and he understood the gist of the situation! The person laying down on the ground was an MC. 100%. There was no doubt about it. Everything about him was screaming that he was!

'How to spot an MC 101.

Blue hair. Check.

Obviously handsome face. Check.

Beaten to death, but no visible bruises. Check.

A thin line of blood dripping from the corners of his lips. Check.

Thugs talking trash. Check.

Revival after receiving his cheat. Check.

Hero posture. Check.'

As an avid reader of Xianxia, Han De had played his own flavor of Xianxia trope drinking games. Watching the newly revived MC beating up the unlucky henchmen reminded him of his past. He would've taken about 7 shots already if this was back on Earth.

"To think that I, Yu Xian, would be betrayed by my wives! HAHAHAHAHA. To think that I would be cast out from my sect!! So be it! I don't know how my soul survived the Ancient Slaying Formation, but since it did… I-

Wha-... AAAARGHHH!!!…"

The new MC grabbed his head and started screaming out of his lungs. Watching him filled Han De with mixed feelings. On the one hand, this guy's power-ups were seemingly accompanied by considerable amounts of pain, which was a telltale of a classic MC. A refreshing sight after Ning Bi and others! On the other hand, he wasn't a locally grown MC, but a transmigrator, like Han De.

'Wait, I'm not even sure if I'm a transmigrator anymore…'

"Aaargh!!...

...So your name was Yu Xian too. I received your memories, and heard your dying wish. This God-King will not let you down. Be at peace!"

'S#$%, he's one of those types… Here I thought I was getting lucky...'

Han De clicked his tongue in annoyance after hearing the MC call himself god-king. Previously, he lucked out with Yao Qing due to her circumstances, but his meeting with the cockroach had been a disaster! Interacting with a third previous-life experience MC wasn't desirable at all. Statistically speaking...

"Interesting! So you survived as well. It must be through your interference that I found this body… Who would've thought that simple-looking hammer I randomly found was a Heaven-Defying treasure..."

The MC was holding a transparent hammer that materialized out of nowhere. He slowly inspected every inch of the hammer and mumbled some gibberish words at random. Han De, still watching from high up in the sky, could only swallow his irritation in silence.

'Are you done admiring your cheat? God damn, I really want to take a look at this guy's luck score…

Should I even interact with this guy? There is no way this guy will become someone's disciple. He is already at the level of monologuing by himself, AND unironically calls himself God-King.

And most importantly... He said wives, not wife. It was definitely plural... He seems to be a harem-protagonist…'

There was a rare glint in Han De's eyes.

'...Hehehe... Serves you right to be betrayed by your wives…

This guy will assemble a harem on this planet too. Once a harem protagonist, always a harem protagonist...'

Han De didn't hate harem protagonists. If he could choose how he would get isekai'd, he would definitely give serious consideration into becoming a harem protagonist himself. When it came to other people though, Han De, didn't like them that much. If they ended up not being alive, Han De wouldn't lose any sleep over it. Especially after being alone for the past few months in a Xianxia universe, his sympathy for the harem protagonists was at an all-time low.

'Get cucked for eternity you goddamn harem protagonist!'

Unbeknownst to Han De, Yu Xian, the harem protagonist in question, felt a chill in his spine. His new body was extraordinarily weak. Not many people could stand getting reduced to this below-average mortal shell after spending untold years as a Celestial Realm god. This level of discomfort was to be expected.

Yu Xian's new body was so dull, it felt like he had lost all his senses and became a cripple. He used to be a blacksmith god and relied on his spiritual sense far more often than the physical senses. Losing cultivation was one thing, but the loss of perception at this level was unimaginable. Unfortunately for him, this unimaginable scenario was his new reality. He looked composed from the outside but he was giving his all to persevere.

Han De instantly felt much better after internally blowing off some steam, and decided not to waste time with this guy. Even if he were to interact with him, this wasn't the right time. The sudden appearance of an expert right after the MC's arrival to this noob planet would definitely raise suspicions.

'Yes, let's ignore the green hat moron. By the time I return to this planet he probably would've left anyway…

He would leave this planet rather quickly, right? I mean, the spiritual energy is so thick… Even this random patch of land is as good as my old courtyard…

Sure, there aren't any resources, at all, but the richness of the spiritual energy...'

Han De's mind went blank. His first priority was different from cultivators. As long as he was safe, as long as he was far away from trouble, he wouldn't mind if he was stuck in the Nascent Soul level for the next 7-800 years. Worst case scenario, he would turn into the Xianxia equivalent of Master Roshi. An acceptable compromise for his continued safety.

Real cultivators though, were obviously different. Rich spiritual energy or not, cultivation needed resources, and this planet had none. This was the prime criteria for growing the Beginning and End Heaven Warding Lily!

Han De unconsciously whistled after realizing the shortcomings of this planet for normal cultivators.

'... What an unlucky guy… He can only spend centuries in bitter cultivation… Man, I really want to check his luck score now. Of all the possible worlds, he had to land on this one.

Hmm, I assume he was brought here by that hammer thingy he mentioned. Was the treasure duped by high levels of spiritual energy? Did it think it saw a liquid tiberium explosion?'

Han De really tried to restrain the movements of his lips, but all of his attempts resulted in failure. Enjoying others' misfortune wasn't very nice, but Han De gave himself a pass on this one. Why should he feel sorry for a harem MC?

Han De left the newly minted MC alone and headed towards the general direction of City A. Not long after he saw a rich-looking small settlement built around a palace. He thought of an idea and descended to the main palace courtyard.

By the time Han De met the locals, Yu Xian had mostly calmed down. Mostly. Getting completely adjusted to his new circumstances was going to require more time, but at least the worst was over.

A bitter smile naturally emerged after realizing how far had fallen. He, who once received the worship of millions, had ended up blabbering aloud to overcome his terror! Terror! Since when the God-King could feel fear?!

"Hmph. I became a God-King once, I can do so again. With the Divine Hammer by my side, my revenge is only a matter of time..."

The irony of stating his intentions out loud once again wasn't lost on Yu Xian. However, getting used to this new body was difficult, and there was that persistent chill on his back...