V. Consume Or Be Consumed

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***

It wasn't certain whether Irina was lucky or unlucky for getting caught up in a deadly situation, only to be saved again by Lucian. She looked at them: Lucian had a dead serious expression, as if he really meant to slash the woman's throat; the woman whom Lucian called Evangelyn seemed in pain and out of breath, yet she had a mocking grin; the man with red hair was just standing, looking as if he'd seen this scene a hundred times.

"Don't fucking play with me, what the hell are you doing?", Lucian asked again.

"I was going to kill her.", Evangelyn answered. "She seems to know what's going on, so she can't be a mere human. Hey!" she called to Irina. "Whatever you are, you're in violation of the Treaty."

"Don't push it, Eve.", Lucian threatened.

"You two, quit it.", the man with red hair said. "Eve, Lucian did confirm she's human. Sir Marcus himself tasked Lucian to watch over her. And you Lucian, you're lucky Eve honored the Treaty of asking questions first. Had she killed her, it would've been your fault for losing her. You know how it goes."

"You're right, Sieg." Lucian shifted his weight from pinning Eve. He released his sword which vanished into thin air, and helped Eve get up, while the latter coughed to catch her breath.

"Hey, can you stand?" Lucian asked Irina.

"Yeah, I think I could- Ouchh!!" she stumbled trying to get up. Lucian was in time to grab her one arm and her body, preventing her fall.

"It's only a flesh would. It should heal in no time", Lucian said, "and what's with you always getting wounded on your leg, are you trying to stop wearing shorts and skirts?"

She was caught off guard and laughed. Evangelyn and Siegfried who were ahead of them walking looked back at them with an amused expression, but she didn't care.

"I didn't know you have a sense of humor.", she said. A few more steps, she started talking in a more serious tone. "Are you going to tell me now what's happening? I mean, you basically confirmed the hospital incident with that leg joke."

"Let's get back to the manor first. It's not safe here yet."

***

In the manor.

"The trauma I have from the shooting and the fall was already too much to handle. Since I left home, it's tragedy after tragedy. I only wanted to know that I'm not going insane.", she pleaded.

Lucian thought for a moment and looked at her straight in the eyes. She felt chills on her nape. This guy looked like he's staring to her soul.

"I told the old man this would happen but he never listens. He did say I should take care of you and that includes keeping you sane."

"So you're going to tell me everything?", she asked.

"You might as well know everything you need to know." Lucian took some drinks and snacks from the kitchen counter and started to explain. They would be talking for a long time. Eve and Sieg were with them in the kitchen but they were letting Lucian handle it.

"Having experienced it yourself twice, I'm sure you no longer question the existence of the paranormal.

She nodded. It was, after all, easier to acknowledge its existence than her going crazy.

"We work under a shadow government organization called ARK that protects, contains, destroys, and maintains balance of the normal and the paranormal world. The three of us are working as Rangers." Lucian prefaced.

"Tell me, what do you think constitutes a human being?" he asked. Irina was confused but she answered, "Body and mind?"

"If it's as simple as that, then we're merely sentient beings like animals. While we have superior minds, that's just a function of the body." Lucian took a pause. "It's our soul. The soul is what makes a human being a human being."

"Okay. So how does that connect to last night and tonight's incidents?", she asked.

"Those men who attacked you in the hospital, they were no longer humans. We call them Nightmares. Their souls were tainted by so much darkness that it could manifest a physical form. Usually, at the cost of the flesh. That's why those guys disintegrated when I "killed" them. But they're already dead anyway so who's judging, right?"

"Hang on, you're too fast.", she protested. "Who's we? What do you mean darkness? Are you saying they were demons made by the devil? Oh my god! That makes hell real!"

Lucian sighed. "No, they were not demons. And demons were fallen angels, so they're not made by the devil. And even the demons and the devil can never hold a candle to those creatures when it comes to evilness." He took a glass and filled it quarter full with water.

"This is the human soul. Pure, untainted. As we begin to be aware of our consciousness, we start to have emotions. These emotions determine the "development" of our soul which in turn, reflects it to our actions."

He then poured some milk to it. "This is holiness, or that's what they call it, the state of being holy, or good to common people. You see that the soul has turned white. It's becoming holier."

"Right, right.." Irina said, affirming that she was following.

"Now, this", as Lucian grabbed the coffee "is darkness. The opposite of holiness, the state of being negative. Notice that a small drop of darkness almost turned the entire liquid black.

Did you ever wonder why happiness only lasts a few minutes while sadness can stress you for weeks, months, or years? That's because negativity is always more powerful than holiness. Misery destroys joy. Fear tramples hope. Despair shakes faith. Hatred taints love.

That's why even if we have faith, we falter at the slightest mishaps. We detest more those who we love when they hurt us.

When our soul reflects it into action, it uses and emits energy that we call "spirit". You may have heard it from traditional medicines already, they call it chakra or chi. And like the law of thermodynamics, this spirit energy cannot be destroyed. It stays in the air that we breathe, that's why sometimes you feel something bad when entering new places but can't explain it."

Lucian looked at her as if examining her reaction.

"Does that mean I'm emitting too much of this negative energy or spirit?" she asked worriedly.

"Yes." It was Eve who answered.

"Am I going to turn to one of those things?"

"Haha!", Eve laughed but she seemed genuinely amused. "You're thinking that once a person gets a certain amount of negativity, they turn to Nightmares, right? Theoretically, yes, but people go insane first before that happens and once someone loses her mind, she abandons the perception of negative and holy, thus she cannot taint her soul darker. Human but insane. That's how people with no medical diagnosis or history become crazy all of a sudden, so you're not off the hook yet. It's not worse than being a Nightmare but it's certainly not good either. Here, let me show you something else."

Eve grabbed the glass from Lucian and filled it with more coffee until it overflowed. She took another glass which was taller and poured coffee. "That glass is human #1. This one is human #2. Understand that humans aren't born equal. Some are naturally stronger than others. However," Eve continued to fill the second glass until it was just full, "everyone has her limit. You either let it overflow like the first glass", Eve picked up the glass and drank it halfway.

"Or consume it before it consumes you."

***

Irina was lying on her bed. She smiled, recalling the conversation. She wasn't going crazy, but was she supposed to be happy knowing that the creatures of the legends and lores actually existed? Worse, these Nightmare creatures seemed to be worse than demons, as Lucian described.

She must truly have a weird sense of humor. But really, she was just relieved that she's not losing her mind. That would be a poetic tragedy if she ended up locked in a mental institute like what her father did to her mom.

She had a glimmer of hope at thought of her mom. She was excited for tomorrow but now, knowing that the House of Vigil was a sacred ground and protected from those shadow creatures, for the first time in weeks, she finally slept in comfort.