Chapter 12

To my relief the next man who asked to dance with me was someone I did not know. It was awkward, neither of us really knew what to say and to make matters worse I was accidentally shutting down his attempts at conversation by not having any memories of the brief times I had apparently talked to him before. 

The dance ended and I was greeted by a less welcome partner. When Leo asked me to dance, the way he asked told me there was no declining him. I was reassured by Anna who was watching me like a hawk despite being engaged in conversation with some ladies fawning over her outfit. 

"Quite the party you've got going on here," he said.

"Yes, unnecessary if you ask me. Leaving the door open is just an invitation for vermin to come scurrying in."

"I'm quite hurt that you would think of your future brother in law as vermin."

"Playing that card now? I thought you detested Anna. Why are you suddenly excited to leap into matrimony with her?"

"The same reason I do anything, dear Princess. To get under your skin. You try to imitate her iron defense but you're still full of holes. You keep looking at her, ah look, there you go again," he smiled his annoying smile at me.

'Calm down Kitty, don't let him get to you. Remember what Anna said, you're looking for weak points. If he believes he can always mess with you all you need to do is pretend you fell for it, rely on his overconfidence,' I thought to myself.

"Cat got your tongue? It's no fun when you're quiet so say something," he squeezed my hand so tightly as to be painful.

"Not very good manners to break the fingers of a woman who is just about to put a ring on one of them," I remarked dryly. 

"Fine, fine," he relaxed his grip considerably,"I almost forgot the reason I asked to dance with you. News of your sudden change of heart has been going around and causing a big upheaval in the social scene. You stand on a mountain of soft power and the country and destitute nobles are waiting for the chance to remake your acquaintance. My sister could use some of that soft power herself, if you wouldn't mind lending her some."

"And why should I do you any favors? There are no debts between the Bezuhevs and the Sherbatskys. I'm fairly certain Kitty gave her quite the tongue lashing last time she saw your sister as well."

"Yes, well that was Kitty and not you. She says she's willing to forgive you seeing as you've turned over a new leaf."

Because he didn't remark upon my purposeful lie of Kitty being the one to be mean to Natasha I was able to get a better grip on the rumors surrounding me. Outside of the palace there were no hard dates concerning my change of heart.

"Haven't you ever felt anything strange about her? Like you're driven to act differently around her," I asked, a sudden curiosity prompting me.

"Hmm? No, she's a perfectly normal girl. Too normal if you ask me, never puts up any resistance to me. Gets boring terrorizing such a perfect victim. That's why you're the perfect target, not too willing but not impervious. But why do you ask? You've never met her before."

"Just rumors I've heard. Anyways, I have no interest in this sister of yours nor any desire to continue fraternizing with you and your family."

"Fine by me, I was only doing this for my father in the first place. He's planning on having her be betrothed to Andrei and thought it would be easier if she's in your good graces."

If I had been drinking something at that moment I would have spit it out. Natasha marry Andrei? This was the first I'd ever heard of such a thing. Before I could press Leo for more information the dance was over and it was time to change partners. 

The rest of the dancing part of the evening I had no more interesting dancing partners. All the rest were men trying their best not to gawk at me to varying levels of success. After the fourth or fifth one I decided I was done with dancing for the night and went to hover around Anna until it was time to eat dinner. 

"Oh Princess, how unexpected of you to join us, I figured you'd spend the entire time dancing like usual," a noble woman I didn't recognize said.

"Oh don't be like that. You know very well the Princess has changed recently," another noble woman said.

It turned out I was unable to be free of the curious eyes no matter where I went. I wanted more than anything to be in bed right now.

"It's been nice chatting with you ladies but the Princess and I have some things to discuss if you don't mind," saying that Anna gently led me away from them.

I found a chair at the very corners of the ball room and sat down in it. Looking on at the party from a detached view gave the entire spectacle a dreamlike quality. Everything looked as if it had come from a storybook. 

"I saw you were chatting with Leo, an unpleasant conversation I'm sure," Anna said as the two of us looked at the dancers and partygoers.

"As always with him, you're childhood friends with him. Has he always been like that?"

"More or less, yes. I will say his sadism has become more pronounced recently; he'd never resort to the sort of physical aggression he's taken to using with you," she paused before adding,"he loved relentlessly bullying me as a child. I remember he once pushed me into a river and I almost drowned. Luckily there was a servant around who saw the whole thing and rescued me. After that he wasn't allowed to be alone with anyone for a long, long time. That was the only time I'd seen him look remorseful about something he'd done. He wasn't sad about almost killing me, just that he was caught," as Anna said all this she spoke with the air of the elderly telling a story from their youth. I supposed that if she had been living this same world over and over again it had indeed been a very long time since that incident.

 "You seem to have finally repaid him for all he's done to you, he really hates you now," I remarked.

"Yes, sadists rarely like it if you use their tactics back on them. Even better is the fact I nearly drowned him without getting caught,"she said this and smiled a bit.

The two of us sat in comfortable silence for a while longer. Eventually that comfort was overtaken by a feeling of existential dread, I couldn't figure out why I felt as if I was having a panic attack until I recognized the girl in the blue dress walking towards us: Natasha.

I got up to move elsewhere but Anna stopped me. I uncomfortably watched as Natasha continued her advance, a blank look on her face. 

"Hello, Princess. Hello Countess," Natasha said, lacking any emotion.

For just a second, I saw Anna show anything but complete confidence. It was hard to place what emotion she made upon seeing the woman in front of us, it was like a mix of seething rage, bitter sadness, and utter dejection. It was only a momentary lapse and she quickly remedied it, once again becoming the cool, confident woman I knew her to be.

"Hello, Princess Natasha Sherbatskaya," Anna returned her greeting but signaled to me to remain quiet, something I readily did. 

"It's a beautiful party, excuse my bothering you but very few of the attendants wish to bare my presence and Leo is nowhere to be found," she explained. She spoke with an unnatural lilt to her voice, almost like she was reading off a script. It was completely different to how she was the last time I saw her. Even more unpleasantly she was almost completely ignoring Anna, instead staring at me fixedly while she spoke. 

I could feel myself lose control of my body slowly despite not saying anything. I was beginning to open my mouth when Anna laid her hand on top of my own hand which was resting on the arm of the chair. Renewed, I continued my silence.

Continuing to stare at me, Natasha started talking to me with her strange intonation, saying,"this is your party Princess. Why don't you say anything? Aren't you mad that a commoner like myself is intruding on your party? You're supposed to be mad. That's how you're written to act. Why. Aren't. You. Mad?"

I could feel Natasha's strange influence begin to overtake my willpower. Even the strength granted to me by Anna was starting to be overpowered. The strain of keeping a hold over my own body and thoughts was a concerted enough effort that I broke out into a sweat. 

Just when I thought I couldn't hold on any longer, like I was finally going to be defeated by whatever eldritch powers this woman wielded, dinner was announced. Not even bothering to finish her line of questioning, Natasha mindlessly walked off and I was once again safe.