Desires

"No." I said to Giken. "No, I don't think I can."

"We must." He asked.

"No, I just can't right now."

"And why not?"

"I'm bleeding, remember?"

Giken breaks out of his spell-like state. "Oh, right. I am so sorry." Giken said as he withdrew backwards. "I don't know what came over me. It suddenly just wanted to taste your lips and.... Well…. the last thing I can remember is before all of this was…" he stumbles to remember what just happened.

"Niiganii!" He shouted as he was about to run off, but stopped to look at me. "Niiganii…"

I gaze at Giken as his expression changes in realization. "The blood moon. Niiganii. Our ancestors. THE PROPHECY!! Everything is happening now." he hollered.

*

We sat in silence for a short while until I finally said to Giken, " Talk to me. Help me understand what is happening."

"Niiganii has been our pact's alpha for years. There is a prophecy in the Ma'iingan Tribes. Every 100 years, when the blood moon beams down to us, a new alpha will be chosen. But I don't understand the fact that all of our alphas, since the dawn of time, have been females. Why me? It doesn't make sense!"

"What were those voices?" I asked.

"You heard them too?"

"Yes, who are they?"

"They are the guardians that oversee mankind. They are what people call karma. If you do good deeds, they will bring you good fate. But if you do evil deeds, the fate they'll give you will only end tragically."

"Why is it that I can hear them?"

"I don't know. I've never heard of them before tonight."

We look at each other.

"They whispered to me that Niiganii is dead. They said that it is my time…" he let out a big sigh. "MY TIME FOR WHAT?!?" He yelled out to the open area and his voice carried over the earth into an echoing ripple.

The red of the moon moves away and lifts some of the darkness around us. I grab his hand and we walk to a space between the boulders, shielding us from sight.

"We have to quiet down and remain hidden for now. Whatever hurt Niiganii is still out there. Let's regain our strength for tonight."

It was a really tight squeeze for the both of us, but our mutual lust for one another is binding so I slept in his arms once again.

Deep in the night when I was awakened by a noise. My eyes shot open and I felt Giken panting, his breathing labored as air puffed from his mouth and nose onto the back of my head, neck and upper back. It didn't sound like his usual breathing, so I slowly turned my head to peek at him.

He was steaming hot in the cool night air. His flesh glistened in the moonlight and the roots of his hair wet from sweat.

"Giken, are you alright?" I asked him as our eyes met. He is breathing so hard that I could see his breath fuming.

"Giken?" I said again, but he didn't respond. It was as though his mind wasn't there. I turn my body around and place my palm over his jaw. I looked into his eyes and saw nothing. "Giken, wake up!" I shook his head a little and he finally blinked. "Wake up…" I whispered.

"Uh…" he sighed. " It's so hard to fight this." he struggled to say.

"Fight what? Are you ill?"

"I don't know. Maybe I AM ill, but I can't help it. I'm just continuously fighting myself."

"Fighting yourself? What are you fighting?"

"YOU."

I give him a confused look. "What do you mean?"

"I am fighting the urge to be with you, because I want you...but I don't know what it is I want. I just want you!" His voice got louder. "I'm as oblivious as you are…but I just want you."

Giken is still panting and steaming in the night light. I stared at his beautiful body.

"Dddd…..do you think it's because we are man and wwwoman?" I stuttered.

"What are you trying to say?"

"Well, when I was very young, I was aboard a ship that had many women… who were always naked… sharing the same bed with our Master… and I heard things"

Giken looked at me tilting his head as he stared my body up and down. He lets out little groans as his breathing continues to labor.

"And??" he asked.

"Well, I hear people talk about men and women and some of the explicit things they do with each other...ttto each other...I mean to one another. You know like… They intertwine… But I was only a child. I don't know what I heard or saw. Just nevermind me."

Giken stood up and closed his eyes. "You smell so wonderful," he moaned.

"Giken, I'm not saying that that is what our body is trying to have us do. Logically, we are consenting adults who can control ourselves~"

"But can we?" he interrupted my spout of excuses.

I look at him just as he opens his eyes. We gape into each other's faces knowing what we both are longing for.

All I could think about is his lips. Those two beautiful sections of flesh, moistly covered that are so thick and luscious; and how I just want to kiss it. I gawked at him in a stupor and my lips parts open, making him chuckle.

"You are mesmerizing in every way. Even when you drool."

I look away and quickly wipe the drool off my chin in embarrassment. "Sereen, get yourself together." I mumbled to myself. Then I glance back up to him swooning at the sight of his dimples and his bright smile.

"I just love that YOU are so mesmerizing in every way too." I accidentally uttered.

Giken burst into laughter and I snapped out of his enchantment.

"You sleep here. I will sleep over there." Giken pointed to a spot nearby still, laughing. "I can't sleep with you because…"

"But what if I get cold?"

"Because I have a strong urge to want to…you know?"

"Want to, what?"

"Intertwine."

I blush at the thought and turn my gaze back to my place of sleep. He reaches his hands over to touch my face.

"Oh, if I could just do what we want. I would do it in a heartbeat. But we can't…"

"Can't?"

"The Ma'iingans tribe breaks down into many branches of the brotherhood. There are many different kinds of wolves, not just one. Our tribe is just one of the many Ma'iingans that are out there. There has never been a time in our history where a Ma'iingan partnered with a being that isn't Ma'iingan." Giken takes in a big breath, "I don't know if I can… with you."

He walked over to his spot, transformed into a wolf, and laid down.

I lay down, my back facing him. I know there is nothing between us. Yet, I can't help but feel like I have lost something very special to me.

*

I am running away from a white wolf that lays dead on the floor and its attacker, a black wolf, eyes shining yellow and piercing into my soul.

"RUN!" I told myself, "RUN!"

I don't look back, but I can feel it right at my tail. The blood moon is high in the starry night sky painting everything red and turning the water into blood.

I run and run until I get to the cliff. The very same cliff I fell off with Giken. Oh no, where is Giken? I look around and he is nowhere to be seen. Just then, the black wolf catches up to me and jumps to attack me. I leap off the cliff in my last attempt to survive.

But I don't fall.

I am drifting in mid air, away from the cliff. I look up at the blood moon and see a woman. She glides through the air like slicing water. Her red dress flowed against the wind gracefully at her side and she reached one hand out to me.

I reach my hand to her, hoping she'd help me, but instead of holding my hand, she reaches into my chest and disappears into my body. Her energy filled my entire body and I realized that that woman was me.

I wake up gasping for air with both hands pressing down on my sternum. I peered around me for the black wolf, but no one was there except Giken, who was still fast asleep.

A distressing pain burned from my chest and I moved the shawl away to look at my skin. A strange symbol was marked on my chest as though someone had taken a blade and drawn on me. I touched it slightly and I stung like a fresh wound.

"Ahh" I groaned, waking Giken.

He jumped up and dashed to me, transfiguring into his human form.

"It's nothing." I hollered, as the new opened wound seeped out through the shawl.

"What's this?!?" Giken shouted and pulled my shawl up exposing my breasts and upper body. I quickly tried to cover myself with my arms, but Giken was glaring at the bloody symbol on my chest, preventing my arms from covering it.

"We need to leave. NOW!" He pulled me up and onto his back and whipped away, transforming into a wolf.

After a few miles, I feel my heart flutter and a fever sets in. My vision starts to blur and I feel weakened.

I start to feel drunk in nauseousness, everything around me spinning out of place.

"Stay focus, Sereen. Stay focused! We are nearly there." Niiganii's soft voice breathed into my ear