Chapter33
#Chapter33
Damien POV
Layla cleaned up all day and night. She barely said anything. I know in this form she has a bit of a language delay and I wonder if that is why. Her words scared me, and I have tried to get her to tell me what she meant, but she won’t answer.
Walking in the kitchen, I find her looking in the fridge. The hole in the wall is repaired now, but it needs painting and looking at it really grinds my gears. Everything needed to be in order, for it to stay that way and that wall was not in order.
Layla stands up, having found what she was looking for. I am shocked when she turns around with a beer in her hand. I was nearly tempted to take it from her, but then thought maybe drunk, I can get answers from her.
/"If you want to know when she is coming back, I can’t tell you because I don’t know,/" She says, turning around trying to work out how to take the lid off. I suppose she hasn’t mastered using fingers. I go to help her when her claws slip out and they go into the can and she peels the top back, using her claws like a can opener. I stare in disbelief. Not once I have ever seen a wolf do that.
/"What?/" she says, looking at me.
/"Nothing, they have a pull ring on top/" I tell her pointing to the can. She looks down at the lid in her hand.
/"Yeah, I couldn’t get these fingers under it, I have seen Lily do it, but doing it myself was a little awkward. These work just as well./" She says, lifting it to her lips.
/"God, this is nasty, tastes like piss,/" She says.
/"You don’t know what beer tastes like?/" I ask her, wondering how she doesn’t when Lily used to spend most of her time drunk.
/"No, Lily prefers vodka, tequila, the shit that burns. She only drinks beer when that’s all there is, and for the most part, I try to block her out when she is drunk. She makes me angry/" She says walking over and sitting on a stool.
/"Aria will be here tomorrow, she was held back. She is having trouble with the kids/" I feel anger roll off Layla at the mention of her name and I wonder why she is angry at Aria.
/"We need to know what to do for the funeral/" I ask her, hoping it might make Lily come forward.
/"Don’t people just dig a hole and drop the body in it and put some decorative crap on top,/" Layla answers, which doesn’t help at all. I suppose I will just have to ask Aria.
/"Will Lily be back for the funeral/"
/"No, I don’t know. I hope soon, because this skin thing is a little itchy, and she really needs to cut this hair. It just gets in the way,/" She says, swiping at her hair. I point to the hair Tie on her wrist. And she looks at me like I have grown two heads.
Gripping her wrist, I pull it off before standing and moving behind her. I pull her hair into a bun, well as good as it will get. I don’t have long hair so it doesn’t look perfect, but it will do, and I worry about Layla chopping Lily’s hair if it becomes annoying. I love her hair.
/"Thanks/" She mutters.
/"You don’t watch Lily much?/" I ask, confused how she doesn’t know some normal simple tasks. I know if I let Darian take over, he can do most things, could probably even cook. He just isn’t comfortable, says it makes him on edge and doesn’t feel right. Looking at Layla though, she looks pretty comfortable, relaxed even though she can’t do the simplest of tasks.
/"No, I usually block her out, unless you’re there or her father. He is funny or if she is in danger,/" She replies, taking another mouthful and scrunching her face up.
/"Why?/" I ask confused, Darian is with me constantly unless I shove him out.
/"Because I hurt her. Being there is a constant reminder of what Kade did to us. Lily likes to put on a front and I know you think I don’t know much but I can tell she is depressed; she always has been. Why do you think she gets shitfaced all the time?/"
/"To control you/" I tell her honestly.
/"No, well yeah, she thinks it does. But that’s not the real reason. She gets like that, so she doesn’t have to feel, doesn’t have to relive it and won’t dream about it. She sleeps better with you near her, your scent comforts her/" Layla says, and I realise maybe none of us really know Lily. Everyone always tells her what they want and need from her, what is expected of her and yet no one asks if she is ok.
/"Is that why she left?/" Layla nods before looking at me.
/"I offered to take over. It worried me she would hurt herself. I just didn’t think she would abandon me. And by the time I felt her leaving I couldn’t force her back/" Layla says and I can see the guilt in her eyes. Feel it through the bond. She feels guilty for not stopping her. Darian whines loudly in my head, wanting to comfort her.
Layla gets up and I watch as she leaves the kitchen.
/"Where are you going?/"
/"To shower, this skin is fucking itchy, and the blood is making it worse/" She says. I follow her and turn the shower on, knowing she probably won’t figure it out. Layla strips off and stands under the water. She is definitely comfortable in this skin, as she has no care that I am watching.
/"You forget Damien, we are the most primal side, Layla wants what Lily wants and vice a Versa. Just Layla isn’t held back from the restraints you humans are self-conscious of/" Darian says.
Stripping off, I step under the water with her. I feel her eyes trail up and down my body and for once I feel my face blush under her gaze, never have I felt so bare before as she literally looked at every inch of me.
/"You done?/" I ask, as her eyes meet mine.
/"Sorry/" She says, passing me the soap. We quickly wash and get out. When we get in bed though. Layla lays her head on my chest and I relax. Only suddenly she sits up before climbing on top of me. /"Layla, what are you doing/" I ask and she leans down and kisses me.
I try to tell her to stop. Pulling her face back to mine. I kiss her before rolling her on to her back and pushing my weight on her. Pulling back with my arms on either side of her head, I look down at her as she inhales my scent, lifting her head up, she runs her nose across the crook of my neck to my chin.
/"Lily, won’t forgive Layla if she takes this from her Damien, make her stop/" Darian says even though I could tell he wants nothing more, yet he loves Lily. She is our mate, so is Layla, but this isn’t Layla’s form to do as she pleases with.
/"Layla, we can’t do this, not without, Lily/"
/"I know and I wouldn’t do that to her, but thanks for assuming I would/" She rambles on for a bit under her breath and Darian feels bad which seeps into me making me feel bad for upsetting her.
/"Well, you read that wrong/" I tell Darian.
/"Nothing wrong with placing boundaries, at least while the rational part of her isn’t here/" Darian answers.
/"She seems more rational,/" I tell him.
/"I think she is just hollow without Lily at the moment, don’t let your guard down. After seeing everything downstairs, what she is capable of. It worries me,/" Darian answers.
/"She seems fine/"
/"Yeah, but what happens if Lily doesn’t come back for a while. I know Layla won’t cope. She isn’t safe in her own mind without Lily, just as Lily isn’t safe without her. Just imagine what it would be like if you only heard silence/" He says.
I pull Layla over to me and wrap my arm around her, hugging her tight, and I feel her breathing even out and her muscles relax at my closeness as she falls asleep. Darian is right, I would go stir crazy without him and it would be so lonely in my head without him. This must feel so foreign to Layla not having Lily’s guidance. I just hope Lily is surviving without her. Because after speaking to Layla, one thing I realised is Lily needs help.